I opened my eyes and it was dark. It was dark and quiet. I woke up early again it seems as I heard no sound of the alarm.

"Another day to praise you Lord has finally come" I hum softly while I`m searching around the bed and slowly getting up then down on my knees. Praying was something my mother taught me. She said that as long as I am willing to talk, there will be Someone willing to listen and that was God she said. 

But appreciating the praying and praying constantly to Him came for me with time.

"God, thank you for another day. For giving me the chance to breath and be a better person"  

"Be it good or bad I know it will all pass so God please be by my side and I by yours"

He was and is my solace.

I got up and with small and steady steps I got towards the window. I withdrew the curtains

'I don`t even know why I am still closing them at night, it makes no difference to me' I opened up the window and taking my time I started admiring the wind that I could feel entering the room, the chirping of the birds, leaving birds, the sound of the swaying branches. It was September, the beginning of autumn and I could not get enough of its harmonious ambience.

The coldness waked me up from my stupor and I knew it was time for me to close the window.

Washing my face, brushing my teeth, wearing what came at hand and slowly going towards the kitchen all came easy.

I started setting up my breakfast. Some fired bacon and eggs with some bread.

Crunch, crunch, crunch

That was the only sound heard and it felt lonely.

I lived alone since I was 24. Even though at one time I have gone back to my parent`s house for some time.

'It never felt so lonely for a long time now, maybe it`s the Fall' I murmured. 

it`s not the first Autumn I spent alone, but the feeling never changes. It sometimes brings back more memories.

~

"Han, you are like a lady, come we are running late for school!!" Ever since I found out that he lives in my neighborhood we started going together to school and sometimes he will sleep in.

"I`m coming, I`m coming, stop yelling, you`ll wake up my lilttle brother"

And then like I always I would be apologizing. Then grumble.

"Isn`t it your fault for oversleeping? Ya, bumpkin!" After hitting him over his back I started running to school.

"Hey! Be careful, I am quite fragile you know?" We liked joking around, even if our jokes may sound lame to others they were funny to us.

It was fall around that year too. One year after he transferred to our school and moved in our Hometown.

~

I once missed those times. But not now. 

I learned to move on, and I did because what it`s not meant to be won`t come to fruition.