After saying goodbye to Judy, the group returned to their room. Alex gave Lilith an odd look before shaking her head and returning to her room.
Vithi, already back in her lair, began to talk. Make sure to get some sleep. Your classes are early tomorrow.
Yes, mom.
Don’t you “yes mom” me, you have no idea how taxing these classes can be. You won’t need to learn any conventional subjects, so it’ll be all magic all the time. It’ll be like working out the whole day.
Lilith grimaced. What about magical history or foreign affairs or whatever?
That’s my job. I’ll be helping you out with that whenever necessary. You’re kind of an academic wonder right now, so they want as much time to study you as they can get.
Great. I feel like a lab rat now.
Lab rat or not, this is still probably going to be the best magic education you could get for someone like you. Anyway, I’m going to give you some of my magical energy for now.
Why?
Lilith could feel Vithi rolling her eyes. It’ll give you a bit more stamina tomorrow, and I won’t be needing too much then. Besides, you can hold 10% of my capacity without any downsides and it’ll probably be mostly refilled by morning, plus you can just give some back if I do need it for whatever reason. It’s the most sensible thing to do.
Alright, if you insist.
Lilith could feel the magic filling her, another reserve of power appearing. It felt like her own, but it was nonetheless distinct – she could easily tell where her magic ended, and this new source began.
I think that should be close to 10%. Anyway, I’m going to hit the hay. Don’t bother waking me up unless you need me. I’ll get up in time.
Got it. Goodnight.
Goodnight.
With that, Lilith changed into some pajamas, set an alarm, and slipped into bed.
Wake up.
Lilith rolled over, trying to ignore the strange voice.
Wake up, child.
Lilith sat upright, rubbing her eyes. She quickly leapt to her feet, looking wildly in every direction.
She was no longer in her room. Instead, she was in a seemingly endless expanse, nothing but pure, undifferentiated white in all directions.
Vithi, can you hear me?! Get up!
She cannot hear you, child. It is just us.
“Us? What do you mean, who are you!?”
A chuckle filled the area, causing rolling waves of bright gray across the otherwise seamless nothingness.
A being of great power and influence, child. Your kind has referred to us by many names. The Great Old Ones. Elder Gods. Abominations. And, whether you like it or not, you’re one of us now.
Lilith shuddered. “And what do you want with me?”
A pink amusement washed over Lilith. Bold words, for one that does not understand the situation. I have come to deliver a gift, to celebrate your entry into our world.
Lilith felt a weight press against her palm. She looked down to find herself holding a book bound in red leather, titled The King in Yellow. She tilted her head slightly as she looked at it.
I see you are unfamiliar with my gift, my child. Fear not, for it cannot harm you. You are one of us now. Consider this a fast-track to power, should you desire it. No strings attached.
“And why would you give this to me?”
The color shifted to the black of a storm cloud ready to burst, streaks of white appearing and flashing across it before disappearing just as quickly. There are those that would seek to use your power for themselves, to harness that which should never be harnessed. I will not let them do this.
“And it’s OK for me to harness.” Lilith stated flatly.
The edges of the endless expanse became pink once again. You are amusing, child. Is the river harnessed by its path? No. It carves its own path, as do you. You are a source of power. Whether you choose to be a dam, or a flood is up to you. I would consider the book, my child. There is no evil power or good power. There is just power and how you choose to use it.
With that, Lilith awoke in her bed, clutching the book to her chest.
Vithi, get up. NOW.
Lilith? What time is it?
Not important. Get out here.
There was some grumbling, but soon Vithi was physically in Lilith’s room. “What’s going on?” She looked at Lilith and frowned. “Are you OK? You don’t look so hot. What’s that book you’re holding?”
Lilith wordlessly handed it over. Vithi hissed as she read the title, tossing the book aside and lighting it on fire. The fire crackled for a moment before extinguishing, leaving the book completely unharmed. “We’re going to see Tunem. Right now.”
“Who’s coming to see me at this time of night? Can’t it wait until morning?” Tunem grumbled, opening his door and rubbing his eyes. He blinked as he saw Lilith and Vithi. “What are you two doing here?” Vithi shook her head and handed the book over to Tunem. His gaze narrowed instantly upon reading the title. “Come inside.” He shut the door behind them as they entered and motioned towards a series of armchairs around a fire.
“Alright, what’s the deal with this book? Both you and Vithi freaked out the moment you saw it, and I’m getting worried.” Lilith asked, settling into one of the chairs.
“The King in Yellow is an old book that drives all those who read it mad. All known copies are currently locked up in high security areas. We actually have a few in my vault. Where did you get this?” Tunem asked.
Lilith explained her dream, causing Tunem to frown deeply.
“Did you not foresee this?” Vithi asked, puzzled.
Tunem shook his head. “No. The Great Old Ones are notoriously hard to predict with divination magic, and the more powerful ones are nigh impossible. Their thought process is just too incompatible with most lines of thinking to reasonably do that.”
“What did the thing mean when it said the book couldn’t harm me?”
“Hard to say. For all we know it doesn’t even view driving you insane as harm. At the same time, it might well mean that no harm would come to you by our definition of harm.”
“And what do you think it meant by power?”
Tunem tapped his chin. “Well, if this holds knowledge that drives ordinary people mad, that knowledge could be useful in the hands of one who has the proper Domain to use it. You might also gain some Aspect or something from completing it. Either way, I’m afraid I’m going to have to confiscate-” Tunem stopped as the book vanished from his hands and appeared back in Lilith’s. She handed it over to Tunem, who took it, only for it to once more appear in her hands. “That’s not a standard trait of the book. I don’t think we’ll be able to take this from you.” He sighed heavily. “I’m going to have to consult with the Protectorate’s Council on this. For now, leave it alone, and we’ll give you further instruction tomorrow. Just…try to get some rest, alright? We’ll take care of this, don’t worry.”
Lilith nodded, and headed to her bed once more.
Lilith blearily shut off her alarm, stumbling off of her bed. Despite her best efforts, she hadn’t been able to sleep well after the night’s events. She forced herself to get dressed anyway and, despite her grogginess, didn’t fail to notice just how…natural it all felt. That made her oddly uncomfortable. She subconsciously maneuvered her wings and tail to the most comfortable position, was able to easily adapt to new ways of doing simple things like showering, and even found that she was using feminine pronouns for herself more and more often. Honestly, she felt…betrayed, in a sense. She felt like she should be hating every moment of this change. Well, maybe not the wings, they had their own benefits, but the rest should be massively uncomfortable. She would expect to feel like a prisoner in her own body, but it all just felt as natural as any other day. Was her identity so weak that it could be this easily changed? Why doesn’t she feel more strongly about wanting to get her body back? Sure, there was a magical component to this, apparently, but if that was the case why did Alex hate her form so much to start with? What was the difference between the two of them? Running parallel to this train of thought was another – was…that really a bad thing? Instead of her sense of self being malleable, did it mean, instead, that her sense of self was strong enough that a change of body was not enough to erode who she was on the inside?
Her reverie was interrupted by a knock on the door. “Hey, Lilith, you…up?” Alex asked, almost hesitantly.
“Yeah. Be out in a sec.”
“Alright, cool, but, uh, you might want to hurry. There are…people waiting. Important people. Really important people.”
Lilith frowned. “What do you mean?”
“Just get out here, stat. You don’t want to make them wait any longer than they have to.”
A few minutes later, Lilith emerged into the main room, which was suddenly feeling rather cramped. The room itself wasn’t the issue – it was large enough to comfortably hold the ten people there – but the general feeling in the air. It was like she had suddenly been transported deep underwater, a heavy pressure weighing her down.
“Ah, Lilith. Excellent to see you looking…well enough.” Tunem said, standing up. “These are the other leaders of the Protectorate. Wake up Vithi, if you would. We’re going to be doing some more…hands on testing today and we’d like everyone to be ready in case something goes wrong. Now, we don’t have infinite time, so we must be moving. Follow me while you wake her up, would you?” Not waiting for a reply, Tunem strode out of the room, followed by Nashra, Alex, and the six people Lilith assumed were the other Protectorate leaders. To her surprise, Judy walked up next to her, grabbing her hand as they walked out of the room.
“Judy? Why are you here? What about work?”
“They took care of everything. Said it was vitally important I was here. I’m not exactly sure why either, but we can’t exactly say no to them, can we? More importantly, are you OK? They briefly explained the situation to me while we were waiting.”
“Fine, but, uh, how long were you waiting? Alex said we really didn’t want to keep them waiting.”
“Maybe half an hour?”
“Half an hour?! Why didn’t you wake me up?!”
“We thought you should rest as long as possible. They were getting me caught up on everything while we waited, so it honestly didn’t feel like that long.”
“Well, that’s…sort of a relief, I guess. I’m gonna wake up Vithi really quick, and then we’ll talk a bit more, OK?”
“Sure thing.”
Lilith smiled before mentally nudging Vithi. Hey, sorry to bother you but I need you to wake up.
What now? Vithi mentally groaned.
Well-
Oh goodness, all seven are here. Alright, hold on, I’m coming out. Vithi cut Lilith off, materializing next to her and Judy.
“Why are all of them here?!” She whispered, leaning in closer to Lilith.
“No clue. Just woke up and they were here.”
“It’s about The King in Yellow.” Judy said. “Something about being watchful and needing a character judge.”
Vithi was silent for a moment before gasping slightly, the color draining from her face. “They’re going to make you read it.” Before either Lilith or Judy could respond, she sprinted up to Tunem, presumably to protest. After a short while, she returned to Lilith and Judy, shaking her head. “He said it was a majority decision by the council. He was dissenting but he said he has a lot less influence in eldritch matters. Says it has to do with not being able to predict the future like he can with most other things. They want Judy here as, among non-Veiled people, she’s most familiar with Lilith.”
Further conversation was cut short as they arrived at a large, intimidating metal door. Tunem recited some incantation, and the door swung open, revealing a long hallway lined with more metal doors. As they proceeded down, Vithi couldn’t help but stop and stare at one of the doors in particular, a strange expression on her face.
“What?” Lilith asked, nudging Vithi back into motion.
“This is the vault. They kept my lamp in that room for a long time.”
Lilith didn’t say anything, and the group walked towards the end of the hallway. When they reached the end, they found a large door inscribed with all sorts of runes, which Tunem opened with another incantation. He motioned for them to step inside, and closed the door after them, the runes bursting to life as it slammed shut. They were in a large circular room, the floor covered in what at first glance appeared to be a madman’s scribble, but upon closer inspection was a series of dizzyingly complex magic formations. Tunem ushered Vithi, Alex, Nashra, and Judy to an intricate magic circle near the edge of the room and had them sit on a few incongruously placed armchairs. He motioned for Lilith to sit in a similar armchair in the dead center of the room and took his place in a chair on the edge of one of the formations. Each of the Protectorate leaders sat down in a similar chair, causing a series of lights to rush from the chairs, spreading throughout the magic formations, which glowed brightly before dimming slightly.
“Lilith, the council has decided to have you read The King in Yellow. During this procedure, you must answer any and all questions directed at you by anyone outside your circle immediately and are not to speak aloud passages from the book under any circumstances. Should we determine things to be going awry, we will activate the protections in the circle and forcibly stop you from reading the book. You may begin.”
Lilith gulped, and opened the book which had conveniently dropped into her lap as she thought of it.
I hope this doesn’t go on for too long. It feels like Lilith is being used by these people like a lab rat and she doesn’t even know enough to care. Even the people who should care about her are totally fine about putting her in a circle of death with a book of madness.
Sorry to complain. Still like the story. I’m just hoping Lilith doesn’t become too passive.
I've taken efforts to scrub the passiveness away, and it's a bit of an effort and takes a while, but I'm happy to say that she's finally at a point where I'm happy with how active she is, so just stick with it, it gets better.
I love the Repairer of Reputations reference. When I got to that I just stopped, stared, and abruptly laughed out loud saying "Oh god" to myself.
I'll be honest, to my great shame I haven't actually read the book yet, but I've got a huge soft spot for the eldritch in general, so a lot of that knowledge has trickled down into me anyway. I really need to sit down and read through a lot of the classic works, but my reading list (of published stuff, anyway) is steadily growing and I haven't yet gone through it all so it's an in-the-future thing
@Fighterman481 I haven't read the "The King in Yellow", just "The Repairer of Reputations" (the first story in that collection of short stories). I understand a few of the other stories in the book are honest-to-god romances about art students. No, seriously, no horror or mystical elements at all.
@AnonymousIncognito Huh. Strange. I'll just have to skip those then, I guess.
Avoided being mind controlled by the society of light just to have to follow each and every order these guys give her. Win win.
Not a great position, sure, but definitely lesser of two evils I'd say. At least one side is a...probably trustworthy government and isn't actively using scummy methods and making you do scummy things.
Hi there Fighterman481!
I began reading this story today and eventually got the feeling that I am at a point where I can give you some feedback.
All in all, I enjoy the story immensely. You built a fantastic ... fantasy-ful(?) world and dropped a few interesting characters into it whose fate I want to follow. Up until now, I think that the story starts out well. Lucas/Lillith and Vithi got their introduction and their character traits mostly fleshed out. Well done! I also like how the story slowly meanders towards something big, possibly a great conflict, that looms in the future like a dark storm cloud at the horizon. I definitely want to read on and see what is coming.
But there is also something I felt less enthusiastic about: You spent a great portion of the story explaining to the MC (and by proxy to me) how the magic works. I learned about Domains, Traits, Skills, and Aspects - and I feel like that this knowledge doesn't help the story overly much. You basically defined a gameplay system as if the story were an RPG, where a player would have to know these things to develop their character.
When you do these things for yourself to keep up a consistency in developing Lilith, that's fine. But I personally felt a bit overwhelmed. You might want to consider to leave these parts out.
On the opposite end of my critique, there was a bit, where I would have liked something more elaborate: This part was when Vithi decided for Lilith new name. It is okay and perfectly understandable, when Lucas couldn't come up with one on her own. But Vithi didn't really give a reason for it, either. For me, as the reader, I know of Adam's first wive in paradise and her damnation. But for Vithi, the name might carry a different meaning. Maybe an old friend she knew from eons ago? Whatever this was, you can easily flesh this part out a bit.
That's all for now! Thank you for doing all the work of creating this wonderful piece of entertainment. <3
Hey, thanks for the feedback, I appreciate it a bunch!
You are 100% correct, there does not need to be nearly as much explanation on magic. In my rewrite the plan is to gut that whole section mercilessly and leave in only the bare minimum required to keep people from being too confused. It's just not relevant enough.
And expanding more on the name is a great idea, I've made a note! The reason, as underwhelming as it is, is just that it's a common name for demons that starts with L and sounds nice, so it was a pretty easy jump to make.
Hi again, @Fighterman481 !
Tis I, Alexia from the future. I traveled back in time from the chapter 41 (which I guess is still past for you) to relativize a few of the things I said.
While I still hold the opinion that a novel, fantasy or not, doesn't need thorough explanations of how the fundamental clockworks of its world work, I have to say that I also probably did not really understand what a litRPG is. I saw it as a novel whose narrative follows the rules of roleplaygames. But now I see it more as a roleplaygame that is played by someone else. So, a non-interactive game, from my perspective.
This doesn't change the joy that I feel while reading. But it explains why there needs to be a certain level of background explanations, help screens, status messages, and the-like. It explains why a character gets hundrets of abilities while ending up with not even using half of them.
So, yeah. I still would suggest to tone them down a little - in general, not just this section. But I see that they actually do belong.
@Lexi Yeah, the explanations can probably be toned down quite a bit, but I'll admit I'm torn on how much I want to show abilities that won't be used. Because on the one hand, I do want to show that, yes, all these new abilities are being gained and not just gloss over them, but on the other they're just filling space and it isn't really important. So, in more recent chapters I've gone with the compromise of just showing the most important ones and writing a sentence or two of acknowledgement for the others, and I think that's working for now. Maybe I'll find something that works better, but until then I...think I'm going with this.
"Instead of her sense of self being malleable, did it mean, instead, that her sense of self was strong enough that a change of body was not enough to erode who she was on the inside?"
Is the "her" here referring to Lilith or Alex? Is she speculating that Alex's sense of self is strong, or that her (Lilith's) sense of self is strong?
In this case "her" is referring to Lilith.
@Fighterman481 so she's thinking that her sense of self may be strong enough to remain the same even if she's changed physically or mentally?
@FallingLeaf The idea behind it was 'even though my body may be different, I still feel like me'. It...wasn't communicated well and IMO doesn't make the most sense, so it's for sure going to be touched up when I Get around to rewriting this section.
Okay good to know Nyarlathotep looks out for his own in your world.
SCP!!!!!!!! the king in yellow is an scp, that drives all who watch the "real" ending of the play to murder each other!
There is a real book, called the King in Yellow, with a dozen or so short stories in it. The first 4 or 5 (been a while since I read it) having the play as the motif connecting them.
But that isn't really what we are looking at since an Oldie showed up. Means we are looking at the version from H.P. Lovecraft Mythos universe and that is a Great Old One named Hastur.
@SneezyOfTie I'm not that well versed in Lovecraftian Mythology, the [King in Yellow] i was referring to was [SCP:701 The Hanged King] which was inspired by KiY.
@joary ooh. Interesting site. Lots and lots of inspiration if I'd ever go for an X-files or hidden world campaign.
@SneezyOfTie theres f*cking everything there. i just went on for 3 hours reading one 001 entry which lead me back and forth through linked articles until i ended up in the Kenowhere Hub. And i still have 20 untouched tabs of linked articles to go through...
@joary The SCP Foundation is a great rabbit hole to go down if you like horror content. Lots of really cool stuff there. I worked some of it into my D&D campaign and I was generally happy with how it turned out. Made for some unique encounters, to say the least
@Fighterman481 not just horror