Anastasia:

After giving  the ornament to Ares, I stepped back a bit. 

The ornaments, not just a communication tool, I can also use it to sense vitality of the other wearer. I can feel his heart beat through it. It also have a tracking system. It’s not that I’m going to invade his privacy, I’ll only use the tracking system when he wants me to. If he says so, or he touched the jewel in the ornament I gave him.

I have a feeling that he will disappear after going outside, I gave him the ornament to see what’s really going to happen. I want to contain him here, he’s a monster physically, but mentally a human. I didn’t believe at first. I just showed him that I  believed him that night he told me. Not after a few days of thinking hard about it, there’s not a single explanation I can think so I just let my self believed his words too. It’s like it’s only natural for me to believe him. I mean, I’m not sure if he naturally believed me too. 

This Frogy, we accidentally got married as the turns of Fate changed. I finally came to accept that I got married to a monster that have human ego after 3 weeks. I don’t know but it’s what I think is right. 

It’s not that if I don’t accept it, the contract will be void, that’s how the God and Spirit of Contracts made them. The contract will only become voided when the duration ends. Such a selfish thing ever created, but well, there’s nothing I can do if that is Fate’s will. It’s also partly my fault that I cited that it’s permanent. I’m also the one who suggested that we do a contract. Well, I’ll put that aside for now. 

“Thank you Ana, I might need your help if something were to happen.” I replied, returning a smile. “Let’s meet again after this, okay?”

I smiled, I’m happy that I have a friend to expect to visit me, no, should I say a husband?  “Yes, I look forward to it.”

He then opened the door, and walked outside, the door slowly closed. 

He’s gone. 

The house gone silent again.  I don’t know if it’s because of the contract or not, but, I can’t help but feel sentimental about him leaving. Is this what I truly feel? is it how the contract want me to feel? Or my past self is coming back and it feel this way? Well, it’s no use thinking too hard about it. I don’t even know what kind of feeling is it. Is this  Hate? Love? Fear? Anxiety? What are they? Ever since I got reincarnated in this body, I don’t know how they really feel.

“Broomy, clean that part.” I said as I pointed, I ordered the living broomstick to clean the corner as I can see a dusts. I don’t know where they come from, I never even open the windows. The living broomstick never moves on it’s own, unless a command is given. 

The broomstick then moves to where Anastasia pointed to clean. 

I have lost in thoughts, and spaces out for a while. 

I’ve shown emotions and expression but, this past days. I can’t help but think they’re not mine. Is it this body’s? I’m still not used to it. It is I who created this in the past  but, I truly believe that it’s not perfect. I can’t even filter and identify what I’m truly feeling. I feel like I lack connection with my own self. I feel like forgot to add something in me. Why do I feel this? I feel like I’m my self but I feel like I’m not too. I’m suppressing the other feeling, but it’s getting more violent as I do. 

I’ve already adjusted my body to a more matured teenager. I don’t want to be mistaken as a little girl anymore, of course it’s not that it’s only my reason. I have a lot of them. My mana capacity increased after a few days of doing contract and naming Ares. Is it phenomenal? Or I just got lucky? I adjusted my body slowly, everyday in 2 weeks. As I shouldn’t use all my mana in a single use.

 I wondered if, 'Should i adjust my breasts too?' After thinking too much about it, I just adjusted it, so that my confidence will rise too! 

The process I did in adjusting, is controlling and letting my mana flow through the internal structure of my veins, muscles, bones and other parts that should be part of growth process. Mana is really a handful, it can even help you grow faster if you know what you’re doing and of course, you should know how to control it. If you fail to control your mana flow during the process, it might causes injuries in your system, worse, it can lead to death. It was hard  at first, but I slowly get used to it as I do it everyday. 

“Hah, I’m bored.” I said as I closed my eyes. 

After a few minutes of spacing out, I got to my bedroom and lay down in my bed as I can’t think of anything to do. I put beside me my witch hat. 

I already read and studied 1/3 of the book, there’s a lot of things I still have to learn from it. My plan is, firstly, read, study, and apply it. The matter of perfecting the execution will be after I learned and studied all of what’s in the book. The book’s thickness is about 5 inches, each pages contains all my knowledge in the past, some are diaries, memoirs of mine, about witchcraft, alchemy, magic spells, and skills. There are aldo notes and warnings for me. There are some pages that encrypted and hidden with some spell. I haven’t look at it yet. 

My past me is such a hard working person right? She even created a book of his knowledges. Well, I think  it’s not actually she done all the writing. I’ve seen one living pen left, and there’s the one’s that already ceased to function. 

Huh? 

I was perplexed that my eyes wide opened. I was about to fall asleep but I got disrupted when I felt something. 

I hastily touched the necklace I am wearing. 

I felt like my connection with Ares is severed, also I couldn’t feel his heart beat anymore. Why? 

“No way, his heart beat…” 

When you do a contract such as marriage, you will have an invisible connection, example like a threads of fate. If the other one can’t feel the connection with the other person they contracted with anymore, this only means one thing. Death. In permanent contact like we did, the connection will only return, if the other one is resurrected or is reborn. 

I quickly stand up from bed and picked up my book. To rush on him, forgetting my hat. I used the tracking system of the ornament necklace I’m wearing without his consent, as I want to know his location. 

As I got down stairs, in the living room. I stretched my left arm, and in the direction to where the living broom is that already finished cleaning. 

“Broomy, come here.” I commanded the living broom stick, then it float quickly and got it to my arms. 

Then, I walked outside, as I’m holding both the living broom and  the book. 

Please don’t be true. I thought as I felt a slow build up of heat in my chest. What is this feeling? My breathing became abnormal, I feel like I’m suffocating. I think I felt it before in my past life, when everyone is dying.

As I got outside the house, I snapped my fingers to add concealment for the tree. Then, I controlled the living broomstick using mana, I controlled it to float in horizontal position. I sat in it then began moving in speed. Heading to where I tracked down Frogy. 

I closed my eyes then after a moment, I located his body through the ornaments. I located his body but I don’t feel any response from him. 

He’s still nearby here.

 I opened my eyes, as I’m heading towards him.

I encountered some monster in the way, but I swiftly dealt with them as I already become accustomed in using offense magic. I used some Fire element and Wind elemental as offense, I also can use other element but, it’s not that I’m looking for fight. My current objective is to find Ares. 

After a few minutes in locating Ares, I finally be able see him, but he’s not moving. 

Then, finally , I got a little near him. I jumped out of the broomstick I rode, and the broom stayed at the same position. 

Ares is just laying on the ground. 

I walked slowly towards him, as I feel like I my body don’t want to move. 

I dropped the book I am holding while walking. 

I feel like the book suddenly became heavy to hold, it’s not like that before. 

My eyes are fixated to his body, it looked like an empty shell. No signs of turning his body to greet  or talk to me. 

Suddenly, I feel like my eyes are itching. I rubbed it, but after that, I felt something wet. 

Why? What’s this liquid flowing in my eyes? Are they tears? 

Tears  uncontrollably flows out from my eyes, it’s my first time in this body, I’m confused. 

Am I crying? No, stop! There’s nothing to cry about, he’s fine. He’s just sleeping right? 

I tried to calm my self, I wiped my eyes to stop the tears but, it’s only getting worse. 

My legs, knees, won’t stop shaking as I get closer to Ares. I feel like it want to just kneel on the ground. 

A wind blown strong, I am sweating and  it felt cold. 

I’m feeling cold, Am I sick? 

I hugged myself for a moment. 

Then I finally get to Ares’s body, I sat on my knees then I lifted his head a little, ‘Guh, too heavy.’ I put his head above my legs, it’s not his whole head but a part of it. 

They’re heavy, his head is heavy. My legs are going to be crushed. 

『Physical Enhancement』

I casted a magic spell to help me lessen the burden in my legs. 

I rubbed his head. 

He have such a rough skin, is this their special feature? Come to think of it, I just poked around him when we first met. I smiled as I reminiscent our first meeting. 

He don’t have any injuries or wounds, there’s no sign of struggle. Also, the other monsters seems like to avoiding this place. Still, I tried to heal him, but nothing changed as I expected. If I use the same method as giving life to an object, he won’t be the same person anymore.

I leaned towards Ares, and then I tried to hug him but his body is bigger than mine. It looks like I’m just leaning to him. My eyes continues to pour down tears. I just closed my eyes, and let it be. It’s not like I can stop them at this moment. 

“Your body became stif. Your skin is hard and cold even hit by direct sunlight.”

“Why did you lay down here? You’re gonna get sick you know.”

“How long have you been laying down here?”

“You just woke up from you sleep for a month, now you’re sleeping again outside.”

“You’re really such a sleepy head.” 

I smiled. 

I mumbled to him, he didn’t respond.

Only a wind blowing, and some forest noises surrounding us. 

“It’s okay, I’ll sleep with you here.”

Unfortunately, we haven’t been able to talk that much or even create some memories, but still. Why do I feel like it’s been so long? 

I feel like the time had slowed. I don’t want to notice and feel anything but him. 

I feel like there’s a hole in my chest, no, I feel something heavy, no I feel like I just want to continue to burst out, no, I don’t know what to feel. I can’t do anything, and I don’t understand. My eyes, I can’t stop them. It’s hard to breathe, this feeling is suffocating, please stop. 

I feel like I don’t care about the world anymore. 

Why do I feel like this? Do I own them? or is it that my past emotions are  already returning? My memories? 

Well, I’ll just let this feellings do what they want. I will just let my self believe on what I believe. And I will let my self feel on what I feel. After all, this is me.