tw: homophobia , slutshaming

    "It's not my fault your fucking zit covered, greasy haired, ugly ass is into me. I'd never be with a boy like you. Ugh, men are all disgusting pigs. I don't know why anyone would be with a man. I've been on so many awful dates with men, even the hotties. I'd rather date another woman because at least then I'd know they aren't just trying to get in my pants the whole time. Am I right, girls? Anyway sorry for the vent I just had to talk about the post @richieusedsocks made. I'm about to end the live, I have to head to class, but maybe you all should send me your worst dating experiences in my email. I'll make a video series roasting the losers. Okay bye sisters!"

Signing off for the morning, I tuck my phone in my pocket as I enter english class. I swear the parasocial relationships my fans form with me is the worst part of being an influencer. All these people saying they love me, they don't even fucking know me. Not that I don't enjoy the attention, of course, but it'd be real fucking nice if these internet weirdos I don't even know would stop thinking we're besties.

"Oh my gawd Alyssa! Your eyelashes, like, look so real this morning!" Stephanie says, as she takes her seat next to me in class. Fucking bitch. 

"Wow, thanks Steph. And that contour makeup really hides your man-ish jawline!"

"Did you , like, see what Joe Walker was wearing today? He's so fruity hahaha. I heard he's like, more of a slut than Brittney."

Ugh. She's so fucking gossipy. It's like she thinks she's the villain in a teen drama movie. She and Brit used to be best friends, what even happened to them.

"Oh, I know, he's such a fag."

"Hahaha right?"

I hate that word. It always makes me feel so guilty, but it's not my fault being gay is a sin. What kind of god makes a rule like that anyway. At least I’m not the one going to hell.

"Alright class, let's go over last night's homework. Everyone made sure to read pages 94-98 last night right? We'll go over the study quiz questions, and then start on chapter 5. Turn to page 96 and 97. Question number 1: 'What are subjective/nominative pronouns?' Anyone have the answer? Yes, Fatima."

The rest of the class was a bore. Why do we have to take 85 English classes? We already speak it, isn't that enough? Luckily it’s not like the teacher gives a fuck, so I could just scroll through my comments on my ig story from this morning. Some people have no idea how much work it takes to look like you just woke up. I spent nearly half an hour this morning curling my brunette hair and doing my morning skin care routine. Top that all off with nude makeup, just for me to take most of it back off, and put on my full makeup for the day.

By the end of third period I was already bored as fuck. Class would be more exciting if they actually taught anything we didn't already know. I was glad to have a break during lunch to hang out with Hayley and Steph. Stephanie might have been a bitch, but she's always been a ride or die friend. And I've known her and Hayley since grade school. Hayley's always been so naturally pretty. Not that I'm jealous, although I have been jealous of some of her boyfriends. They're not even that hot, but any man good enough to get a girl like Hayley must be something special. With her beautiful auburn hair and her deep hazel eyes you could just lose yourself in. Since middle school she really glew up too. She was the first of our group to get her boobs, and I wasn't the only one who noticed. Steph and I waited outside our lockers for Hayely's class to be dismissed. Steph was no doubt sending gross men pics on snap. When suddenly, the students file out of the room into the cramped hall, and Hayley heads straight for us in a stunning cute floral sundress.

"Glad you could, like, grace us with your presence lee. Too busy sexting Dominic?"

"Shut up Stephanie, Mr. Talley made us stay late."

"All men are assholes." I declare, much to Hayley’s apparent discomfort.
She’s always been the nicest in our group, and shys away from insulting people. I often worry that if it weren’t for Steph and I, people would walk all over her.
"Love that dress by the way Hayley!”

"Yeah, like, really hides your muffin top well."

Fucking Steph. I not-so-subtly swing my arm, carrying the tray, back into her as punishment.

"Oof. What, too far?"

"Hey, go easy on her, Lyssa. Her mom was being a drunken idiot again last night."

"Like, thanks for sharing with the whole world, bitch."

"Puh-lease, we all know Lyssa here is your closest friend besides me. Lighten up a little Stephy."

"Yeah, so, like, On that lighter note, did you all catch Mrs. King Kong thong this morning? Talk about a bad case of fucking camel toe." Steph says, sitting down.

" Oh bitch, shut the fuck up I know right?" I say, as me and Hayley join her on the lunch benches.

"You two just live on gossip, don't you." Hayley says.

"I resent that. Gossip is totally the lowest form of flattery."

"Suuuure." Hayley says, rolling those captivating eyes of hers at me.
It’s funny how happy being with these two makes me. Despite the drama we’ve had together, these two have always been the most real friends I’ve had. Sure there are those who pretend to be my friends to get close to the popularity. There are fans who think they love me, even though we’ve never met. Even though most lovesick fans would never even get the chance to meet me, they are obsessed with the idea of us being friends. Being famous and popular isn’t as easy as it seems, because there will always be fake people. Steph and Hayley though, I know they will be with me until the end of time. And despite how much of a katy bitch Steph is it’s moments like these that I feel truly happy.