Chapter Twenty-four

Where Should I Begin?

~*~

 

 

 

In the early afternoon, Kelvaran received an unexpected visit from Tamyn.

Kelvaran didn't dislike Tamyn, but lately he'd felt increasingly tense around him for some reason he couldn't quite put a finger on.

But, Master Ilianus was his senior, and a Master Alchemist of the Queen, so Kelvaran must show him due respect. He restrained his irritation and invited Tamyn to a seat in his office.

“How may I help, Master Ilianus?” he politely inquired.

Tamyn hemmed and fidgeted in his seat a bit before beginning.

“About what happened last night...” he said hesitantly.

Kelvaran's face heated with embarrassment at the memory of last night's events. That shame had been plaguing him all day and now his hackles rose as he braced for what he assumed would be a scolding, but Tamyn raised his hands in a reassuring concession.

“The details are none of my business, I agree,” he said hastily. “Kazia did explain somewhat, but I believe that she left much unsaid - as she should.”

Kelvaran relaxed a bit at that. Tamyn seemed far more nervous than belligerent. Remembering other recent interactions with Kazia, though, Kelvaran became pensive.

“Is Lady Devratha terribly upset with me?” he asked. “Did she send you... I should be keeping my distance from her, if that's why you've come.”

“She's fine,” Tamyn assured him, “and not upset with you. I only wanted to speak with you... as Kazia's supervisor, I do feel a bit of responsibility for her well-being. She's an adult, of course, and will make her own decisions, but I have promised certain people that I would look after her. I wonder if you might accept a bit of advice, unsolicited though it might be?”

Kelvaran eyed him skeptically, but suddenly noticed how tired Tamyn looked, how red his eyes were, and how he held his jaws tightly to control a tremor in his lips.

“I'll listen,” Kelvaran said with a frown.

“Lord Meratha, Kazia will require an abundance of patience from you,” Tamyn said kindly, “and I would give her the same advice, regarding you. Having never been in a relationship with a woman myself, I can't speak generally on women in these situations, only what I know of Kazia herself.”

Kelvaran's eyebrows lifted slightly, and Tamyn continued with a smile.

“Besides having patience, you should not keep secrets from her. Include her in your decisions, especially if they affect her.

“You must be aware now of some of the difficulties she has faced, and you have faced many difficulties of your own. You both have made a habit of keeping to yourselves, and now you must learn to allow another person to get close.

“Under the best of circumstances, relationships do not magically fall into place, happily ever after. They require much effort on the part of both parties to make them work.”

Kelvaran's brow furrowed, still mistrustful. “You said... if you've never been in a relationship, then how...”

“I said not with a woman,” Tamyn replied in a meaningful but good-humored tone.

“I don't foll... oh!,” Kelvaran said, suddenly flustered. “Oh... I see.”

“You wouldn't think ill of me for that, would you Lord Meratha?”

“No!” Kelvaran replied defensively, then added with the utmost sincerity, “No, of course not.”

He became deeply thoughtful for a long moment before quietly saying, “Recently, I've begun to understand that for most of my life I've been... unduly self-absorbed, perhaps not quite the keen observer of my fellow humans that I may have thought myself to be.”

“You're young,” Tamyn said warmly. “Wisdom comes with years and trust me, those years will add up with no effort at all. Don't be in a hurry. Be patient with her, but be patient with yourself as well. You two will face some periods of separation in the days ahead...”

He broke off, drawing a deep breath as his already reddened eyes began to glisten.

“You may be tempted to rush things in the time you are together,” he continued, his voice now rough and mournful. “It may take some effort...”

Tamyn shook his head, collecting himself with a bitter smile.

“I digress,” he said briskly, “but I think you understand.”

As Kelvaran frowned at him, not sure that he understood Tamyn's mood at all, they were interrupted by a knock at the door.

Tamyn cleared his throat and quickly stood.

“I've taken enough of your time,” he said, and then upon opening the door, “Ah, Kazia!”

Kelvaran rose from his seat as Kazia peered through the door, her gaze passing between the two men.

“Everything alright here?” she asked with a smile.

“Quite so,” Tamyn answered. “I was just on my way out, so please...”

“Yes, come in,” Kelvaran said. “Master Ilianus...”

“Yes?” Tamyn said, turning back.

“Thank you,” Kelvaran said.

“Of course.”

~~~*~~~

It was lunchtime, but Abrizhen ignored the food getting cold on the table across the room, much to the displeasure of an enormous gray dog who sat on its haunches, shifting its shag-curtained gaze between Abrizhen and the food and occasionally offering a piteous whine.

Abrizhen ignored the dog as well. He sat at his desk, writing furiously, and even when the door opened he gave no acknowledgment.

Yilina peered over his shoulder to read a few lines and scoffed lightly.

Abrizhen ignored this too.

“You're not eating?” she asked.

“I ordered wine,” he said flatly. “It isn't here yet.”

“It's the middle of the day.”

“It's the dead of night somewhere.”

Abrizhen stopped writing and hauled himself out of the chair to lurch toward the door.

He had clearly already found some wine earlier.

He pulled the door open, but then pitched forward, catching himself with an outstretched hand against the door frame. A bright red line bloomed across the back of his shirt, and Yilina hauled him back from the door.

“Where are you going?” she asked.

“To find the maid I sent,” he said. “I'd like to know where my wine is.”

Yilina dragged him back to the chair and pushed him into it, then began to unbutton his shirt.

“What do you think you're doing?” he muttered.

“Looking at your back. You just pulled your wounds open. Stop fussing.”

“Are you my mother now?” he sneered. “No, my mother is dead. Do you know how she died?”

“I'm not your mother,” Yilina said indifferently. “Don't be a baby.”

She pulled his shirt off and began to unwind the bandages encircling his torso and shoulders. After examining the fresh whip marks across his skin, she laid a hand over the one that had just reopened and sent a gentle flow of ethereal energy across it.

Abrizhen winced as the flesh reacted. This wouldn't heal the wound completely, but would speed its process of knitting back together.

“There,” Yilina said in satisfaction. “What would you do without me?”

“Where should I begin?” he replied sullenly.

Yilina ignored him and retrieved a pile of fresh bandages from Abrizhen's bathroom.

“Lord Devratha?” a soft voice came from the open doorway, and the Manor's housekeeper entered the room carrying a large bottle. “I believe you ordered this, but...”

“He can't have it,” Yilina snapped.

She crossed the room and plucked the bottle out of the woman's hands.

“Don't listen to her, Avetya,” Abrizhen said, smiling at the woman. “Come in and wrap my bandages?”

Avetya nodded with a warm smile and came over.

“I'll do that,” Yilina said, attempting to wave Avetya out the door again.

Avetya was technically the assistant housekeeper. She'd been apprenticed to old Mrs. Ludel, the Head Housekeeper, since childhood and although Mrs. Ludel was retired now and Avetya managed Devratha Manor already, she wouldn't officially take the title until the old woman passed away.

She was only a year older than Abrizhen, still unmarried and quite beautiful, with honey brown hair, and the pale skin and piercing blue eyes of the far north.

Although Yilina knew that Abrizhen wasn't attracted to women, he and Avetya had always displayed a closeness that rankled her. She wanted to be the only woman with any influence over him.

Yilina often thought of trying to get rid of her, but Gorvan seemed to have a fondness for her too.

“I want her to do it,” Abrizhen said, glaring at Yilina. “And then I want you both to leave me here with that wine.”

“Abrizhen, I need you sober tonight,” Yilina said, sitting in a side chair as Avetya began to work on the bandages. “You're accompanying me to Yldratha for the Winter's End Festival.”

“I'm not going,” he stated.

“You are. It's orders of the Prince.”

“It's so boring.”

“All of your friends will be there,” Yilina said, exasperated now. “You haven't seen them in ages. You need to get back to your life here.”

Avetya tied off the bandage and gave Abrizhen an affectionate pat.

“I'll go find you a clean shirt,” she said.

“While you're at it, pick him out some clothes for tonight,” Yilina called.

Abrizhen suddenly rose up and leaned over Yilina's chair in a fury.

“You don't give her orders,” he said angrily. “Try to remember that you are a servant in this house too.”

The dog stood alert and growled, raising one lip to show Yilina its teeth.

“It's alright,” Avetya said, trying to calm the sudden tension. “I'm happy to pick you some clothes.”

Abrizhen gave one last glare to Yilina, who returned it in kind, and sat back in his chair.

“Only if you want to,” he called back pleasantly. “You really are good at it.”

“What has happened to you, Abrizhen?” Yilina said with a mixture of pity and disdain.

He only returned her a look of incredulity. How could she not know?

“Go away, Yilina,” he muttered. “Don't let me see you again until tonight.”

Satisfied, Yilina rose from her chair and practically flounced out of the room, taking the wine with her and calling to Avetya as she left, “See if you can make him eat!”

The dog slowly lowered its rump to the floor again, giving another low growl from deep within its chest.

“Byel... hush,” Abrizhen murmured, eyeing the dog affectionately.

“Good boy,” he added.

Listening to the sounds of Avetya rummaging through his wardrobe, he sighed and picked up the page he'd written earlier.

He read it over, then with slow and deliberate care, he rolled it up and set one end of it into a candle flame.

~~~*~~~