While I am playing a coop game with Space Doggo. I began to truly understand how far her powers reach. She chains 1000+ frame perfect¹having a window of 1/60 of a second to press a button and angle perfect inputs ²having a joystick that needs to be in a 0.1 degree angle of a direction or the tricks fail sometimes more and sometimes less precise just to show a random unintended easter egg. I even asked her to beat a couple “perfect” TAS’es³ A TAS is a way to use cheats and hacks to perform everything in a much slower version to later speed up once more to essentially get the best possible speed run and she just did it. She even managed to beat super Mario in under 4:54⁴This is only possible using bugs and glitches that have yet to be discovered in a game that has been turn over and around over a decade..

I began to wonder.

“Whatever happened to the world I came from?”

“The short answer is global warming and 30 000 years after that the inflated egos deleted that world.

First some disasters happened in third world countries that disrupted the global food chains. After that people began hoarding and fighting for food and blaming governments. Shortly after that governments began to fall and the world broke out in anarchy. The only people that were sufficiently prepared were some rich snobs that literally took the lives of others in their hands. I mean with bombed collars or just implanted bombs. Those people eventually committed suicide and took the rich snobs with them. After that the people that managed to survived did not work enough together and stayed too far from one another and they all eventually died of too much incest.”

“That….. Somehow seems normal and predictable.”

“It happens way too much, I have seen it happen more than a few thousand times.”

“How old are you to be able to witness it that often?”

“853 Million eons.”

It takes me some time to process that answer. One eon is one million years that means she is older than our universe by 50 thousand times?

“65 Thousand if you want to know.”

“Thanks…. WHAT?!? h-h-how do you even remain sane all that time?”

“you don’t.”

I look to my side in confusion, she looks very sane and chill to me.

“It is just that my insanity does not bother anyone. And I keep taking and having human interactions like we have now to force myself to keep on learning and knowing how to interact with humans without forcing an entire universe to my whims.”

“I-i-if you do not mind me asking. What is your insanity?”

“Do not bother being panicked. If I did not want you to ask a question I would have made sure you did not ask it. It was my choice after all to mention how many worlds I have seen end that way and what my exact age is. My insanity is paranoia. I do not trust anyone and anything. So I keep on making myself stronger to be able to kill beings that would have killed me eons ago. And I gather information about the quantum state of people to enable me to fully predict what a person will do. And if they are no harm then why not let live. The less power I need to show the less likely someone will try and be able to kill me.”

“That seems both reasonable and logical. That would explain why you can read minds. You literally know them better than they know themselves.”

The Space Doggo agrees.

“Now want to continue that Sci-fi-topia save?”

I had long stopped wondering how she got the save data and original games and just enjoyed it. It did alleviate the pain from my death by removing some of the regrets I had. And playing games while having cosmic events happening around you that would normally be able to kill gods did feel strange. But what can one do about it when being next to an even stronger being?

Some time later I was done with every regret I had, it is strange that I did not have any regret related to people?

“So what kind of next life are you able to give?” I asked SD

“Well, everything you can think of. The inflated egos have worlds dedicated to some weird fetishes.”

Before I could stop her she continued, “one dude just loves to feel pussies around his dick so he set up a system that empowers women if they have a specific type of dildo in theirs. Of course all of those dildos are connected to his dick.”

“STOP, do you know SHAME?”

With a dead panned face she asked me, “No, is that edible?”

I fell silent. How do you answer that? I still tried, “No it is not, it is related to humility and humans. And not talking about things like that openly.”

She laughed hard, “of course I know it. I just often have no use for it.”

I calmed down and realized that she probably knows the meaning of that word better than me. After that I formulated what I wanted.

“I just want no people, I want to be able to move freely and have tentacles.”

“Well that is a short and open list. Seems like being an Octosquid on an fully aquatic planet with no other sapient being is something for you.”

“Seems like a good choice. Except, what is an Octosquid?”

“An Octosquid has flexible arms like an octopus. Tentacles for grabbing, a bigger brain and a flexible body like an octopus while having two round pupil eyes like a squid. Furthermore this is an evolving species. It takes DNA from all it eats and if it deems it a useful feature it can copy and incorporate it into itself. I will instead of that based on feelings make it in a system structure. It is also able to grow to any size as long as it defeats and eats an Octosquid of the same size. Do not get buddy buddy with the species they will backstab you. You get this ever growing boon in the system. Based on size you can get more tentacles. I will also drop you in a biome that allows you to survive on the other side of the planet of the normal breeding and hunting grounds. The system is only to take over what would normally be your instinct. So no investigation skills for you. The Octosquid can also choose between mutually exclusive things. Please remember that some parts of the DNA might automatically combine some things but not others at arbitrary points and moments. So killing something that has both of the features at the same time will be a benefit.”

“That sounds like a strong animal. Is it an apex predator?”

“Only when it gets big enough.”

“I will take that deal.”

Space Doggo makes the chill space disappear and turns to me.

“Good luck and I await the story that you will create.”

I blinked and I suddenly heard the sea outside of the transparent egg I am inside of. Time to get used to tentacles.