There is a small trivia at the end of this chapter)

(Warning: This episode has a few non-wholesome and family friendly moments. And a Ara Ara. And some hand holding. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.)

Everyone is in class.

Roswaal:"Okay, let's get this talent show staaarted."

Roswaal puts his hand on a box.

Roswaal:"I've got pieces of paper in here with everybody's naaames. I'll draw them one at a time, and when your name is called, you'll show us your taleeeent!"

Roswaal puts his hand in the box and pulls out a piece of paper.

Roswaal:"The first name is.... Mr. Rerugen!"

Erich:"What? M-Mr. Roswaal, why do I have to participate?"

Cocytus:"Because Mr. Roswaal said, 'Wouldn't it be fuuuun?'"

Ram:"That settles it, then."

Roswaal:"We're all going to be friends here, after alllll. You should go first and set an exaaaample."

Erich sighs and walks to the front of the class.

Erich:"I am Erich von Rerugen, TA of Class 2. I humbly submit my performance of our Empire's national anthem."

Erich starts to sing.

Smaug:"Dear me, someone kill me."

Tohru covers her ears.

Ilulu is also covering her ears.

Dave:"I think this is nice."

Kobayashi:"At least someone is nice."

Smaug slams his head into the desk. Smaug's tail faints.

Erich finishes singing and he is off to the side with a depressed aura around him.

Roswaal:"Now, who's next?"

Roswaal pulls out a paper.

Roswaal:"Oh! It's Subaru!"

Subaru:"Heck Yeah! Thanks to Mr. Rerugen, anything I do is going to look great by comparison."

Subaru stands up.

Ram:"Sure, but I can't imagine you having anything worth showing."

Subaru:"I thought you'd say that, sis. But I do have one amazing talent."

Rem:"That was amazing, Subaru!"

Subaru:"I haven't done it yet."

Subaru walks to the front of the class. Then he pulls out a red string from his pocket.

Subaru:"Now, in my hands I've got an ordinary length of string. It hasn't been cut in any way and there are no knots."

Subaru then starts to mess around with the string.

Subaru:"But if I do this.... and this, and then this..."

The sting is now in the shape of Tokyo Tower!

Subaru:"Tokyo Tower!"

Everyone is silent and Smaug boos him.

Subaru:"No! I knew it was boring!"

Subaru goes back to his desk

Rem:"No, I was extremely impressed! I have no idea what you did, but still..."

Dave:"I have no idea what a Tokyo is, but I thought it was cool."

Roswaal:"OKay, next!" *He pulls out a paper.* "Oh, it's Reeeem!"

Rem:"Okay!"

She stands up and goes to the front of the class.

Erich is now holding a watermelon.

Rem's demon horn grows on her head and she pulls out her morningstar and throws it at the watermelon. She hits the melon exploding it, but not hit Erich at the same time.

Erich falls over and Rem pulls back on the chain and catches her morningstar.

Smaug:"Holy Poop."

Tohru:"That was impressive."

Ram:"Of course. Rem is very good at her job."

Rem goes back to her seat and sits down.

Rem:"But not nearly as good as you, sister."

Kobayashi:"Ram must be very impressive in combat then."

Smaug:"I wonder who's next."

Roswaal pulls out a piece of Paper.

Roswaal:"Dave is next."

Dave gets excited.

Dave:"YES!"

Smaug crosses his arms.

Smaug:"Just don't embarrass us!"

Dave stands up.

Dave:"Right."

Dave picks up his notebook and walks to the front of the class.

Dave clears his throat.

Dave:"Today, I drew my friend." *He blushes.* "Elma."

He turns his notebook around and shows his drawing.

(I don't own this.)

Smaug:"Hmmm. Impressive."

Rem:"It's a nice drawing."

Kazuma:"So that's what Elma looks like."

Albedo turns to Ains.

Albedo:"Lord Ains, you should draw me."

Kanna:"I like the drawing of Lady, Elma."

Dave blushes at all the comments.

Dave:*Embarrassed.* "Thank you."

Dave goes back to his seat.

Smaug:"You did good, kid."

Dave:"Thank you, Mr. Smaug."

Smaug:"Think nothing of it. Seriously, please don't."

Roswaal grabs another piece of paper.

Roswaal:"Oh, it's Weiss next."

Matheus stands up.

Matheus:"Yes, sir!"

Smaug:'I have a bad feeling.'

Violet:'He's going to embarrass, Major. I know it.'

Matheus stands at the front of the class.

Matheus:"I am Matheus Johann Weiss, of the Imperial 203rd Aerial Mage Battalion! I have no particular talents, so the least I can do is remove my first button!"

Mathues starts to take off his clothes and Smaug shouts in alarm and covers Kanna's eyes.

Smaug:"PROTECT THE CHILD!"

Tanya:"Interference Spell!"

Tanya knocks Mathues out and Tanya's other soldiers pick him up and drag him off stage.

Violet:"I knew it."

Tanya looks to the rest of the class.

Tanya:"I'm sorry you all had to see that!"

Darkness:"I hope she does that to me, too!"

Kazuma:"Why don't you shut up, Darkness?"

Roswaal grabs a paper.

Roswaal:"Next us is, Smauuuuuuug."

Smaug:"Finally."

Smaug walks to the front of the class.

Smaug:"I the great Smaug, will show you something amazing."

Suddenly smoke appears around Smaug.

Then the smoke clears and Smaug is now in female form.

Then he does a pose/

(Don't forget Smaug's voice changes with each form.)

Smaug:"What do you guys think.

Everyone, minus the dragon maid group, jaws are dropped.

Smaug:"Pretty amazing right."

Kazuma:"Smaug's the ultimate trap!"

Ains:'What is wrong with this world?'

Rem turns to Ram.

Rem:"I'm really confused, sister."

Ram:"Me, too."

Megumin:"Dad? Or is it Mom? I have no idea now."

Tanya:"Smaug, can change into a female?!"

Visha:"I'm confused."

Violet:"Is the world a lie?"

Roswaal:"Well, this was unexpeeeeeeeected"

Smaug then gains an evil smirk.

Tohru's eyes widen.

Tohru:"Don't do it Smaug!"

Kobayashi:"Oh, no."

Kanna:"Lord Smaug, is going to do the thing."

Smaug gives a sultry smile and brings his hand up to his mouth.

Smaug:"Ara~ Ara~ "

Kazuma falls to the ground with a bloody nose. Subaru has a big blush and a green aura appears around Ains. Dave looks down to his notebook with a blush and continues to draw.

Violet:"Major, are you alright?"

Tanya has a hand on her nose.

Tanya:"Yes, I am."

Some blood seeps through Tanya's fingers.

Ilulu starts imagining things and her face glows red.

Smaug laughs and changes into his male form and walks back to his seat.

Smaug:"I am the best."

Roswaal grabs another piece of paper.

Roswaal:"Next up is Darkneeeeess."

Darkness Stands up.

Darkness:"I can't do this along, so..."

Darkness starts to rub her arm.

Darkness:"Can someone help me?"

Grantz raises his arm.

Grantz:"Me! I'll help, then!"

Grantz stands up.

Tanya:"Why is he volunteering?"

Visha:"No idea."

A couple minutes later.

Grantz and Darkness are at the front of the classroom.

Grantz is holding a whip.

Darkness:"My talent is my strong body. In order to show this," *She motions to Grantz.* "I'm going to have this tough-looking man punish me with his whip."

Darkness sticks her butt out and shakes it.

Grantz:"Ehhhh?!"

Darkness:"Now, man in military clothes! Punish me mercilessly with your whip like you always do!"

Grantz starts to panic.

Grantz:"I do not always whip you!"

Ram:"That man is a scumbag."

Cocytus:"A disgrace to the warrior ethic."

Rem:"He really is a scumbag."

Smaug:"There is a child present!"

Grantz:"No, no, no..."

Subaru walks to the front of the class.

Subaru:"Hey, mister. You need to treat women with respect!"

Grantz:"I didn't do anything, though!" *He looks to his friends.* "Right."

They look away from him.

Grants:"Don't avert your eyes!"

Visha:"Lt. Grantz..." *She glares at him.* "You're a scumbag, aren't you?"

Violet glares at Grantz, too.

Violet:"Yes, definitely is."

Grantz cires.

Darkness:*Wiggles her butt.* "Come on, do it! Or is your friend going to join in? Are the two of you going to have your way with me?" *She blushes more.* "How terrible! But I shall endure."

Subaru:"How did I get caught up in this?"

Ram:"You really are a scumbag, Barusu."

Darkness:"Then Smaug can join. The way he ravaged me that night." *She moans.*

Smaug stands up.

Smaug:"Don't bring me into this!"

Everyone starts to yell.

A few minutes later.

Roswaal pulls out a piece of paper.

Roswaal:"It's Aqua's turn."

Aqua seems uninterested.

Aqua:"Really?"

Kazuma:"What's wrong? Just do you 'Nature's Beauty!' like you always do."

Aqua:"Listen, we've been over this. I don't do tricks on command."

Aqua crosses her arms and looks away.

Roswaal:"Well, that's a prooooblem..."

Then Aqua gets an idea.

Aqua:"Magic's okay, too, right?"

Roswaal:"Sure, as long as you've got something that'll surprise the claaaaass!"

Aqua stands up.

Aqua:"Okay, I'll show you something special, then! An ultimate spell only usable by a goddess!" *She starts to cast a spell.* "Sacred Turn Undead!"

Kazuma:"Are you trying to vaporize your classmates?"

Kazuma wacks Aqua on the head.

Aqua:"But it's not fair that I have to be in the same class with those defiled creatures! I'm a goddess, you know!"

Roswaal:"So there you gooooo. Aqua's talent was a husband and wife comedy routine.

Aqua:"Wait!"
Kazume:"Hang on!"

A little later.

Roswaal:"We're almost out of time. I wish there was time for everybody, but I think we'll call it a day after the next twoooo. Anybody who wants a go, raise your haaaand."

Megumin raises her hand.

Kazuma:"Darkness has already humiliated us. Aqua's already made us look like idiots. Megumin, how about you don't make it any worse?"

Megumin:"Don't be silly. You know I'm not going to miss an opportunity like this."

Kazuma:"You don't have any hidden talents, though."

Megumin:"I do."

Kazuma:"Do not."

Megumin:*Slams her desk.* "Do, too!"

Kazuma:"Fine. What is it?"

Megumin holds up her staff.

Megumin:"I have my explosion magic, the strongest, most powerful magic in the world!"
Kazuma:"That's the same thing you always do!"

Later everyone is outside.

Roswaal:"We don't want you firing that off in the claaaassroom. So I've prepared a target for you heeeeere."

There is a bronze statue of Pandora's Actor.

Megumin:"I'd prefer a target that wasn't a bronze statue, but thank you!"

Kazuma:"You sure about this, sir? She may be off her rocker, but her explosion magic really is amazing!"

Smaug:"And it hurts, too."

Ains takes a few steps forward.

Ains:"I'd love to see it, then."

Megumin:"You undead guys are in for a real treat, then! Behold the power of the daughter of Smaug, Megumin!"

Megumin starts to cast her Magic.

Megumin:"Within this power dwells a shining light. It guides the unseen to me, and calls to me from within the chaos. In this moment, explosion magic beckons me!"

Megumin aims her staff at the statue.

Megumin:"Strike my foe! Explosion"

A massive explosion goes off and when the smoke clears a big crater is now where the statue was and Megumin is on the ground.

Megumin:"That felt so good!"

Kobayashi:"Wow."

Roswaal:"She wasn't lying. That was really impressive. Perhaps this is a good time to end the show...."

Ains:"No, not yet."

Roswaal:"Oh?"

Ains:"That spell was incredible."

Smaug goes over and puts Megumin on his back.

Ains:"I feel fortunate to have witnessed it. I would like to take this opportunity to show a talent of my own."

Roswaal:"And what would that be?"

Ains:"Let me see..."

Ains then heads over to the middle of the field and starts to cast some magic.

Smaug:"Wow."

Megumin:"How can he use so many magic circles?"

Kobayashi:"So bright."

Kanna:"Pretty."

Tohru:"It's not that amazing."

Dave:"Wow! This is so cool!"

Ilulu walks next to Smaug.

Ains finishes the spell and it glows brightly blinding everyone.

Smaug:"I'm Legally blind!"

Everyone opens their eyes.

And it suddenly starts to snow.

Smaug:"huh?"

Smaug puts his hand out and some snowflakes fall into it.

Ilulu:"Snow?"

Kanna is making snow angles in the snow.

Tohru made a snowman that looks like Kobayashi.

Ilulu grabs Smaug hand and holds it. She then puts her head on Smaug's shoulder and Smaug puts his head on her head. Megumin snuggles in between them.

Smaug:"We're like one big happy family."

Ilulu:"Yes, exactly like that."

Megumin:"Best parents ever."

----------------------------

Trivia Time!

For those who are big fans of the Dragon Maid's Brother series. Here are some questions for you, see if you can get them right!

Question 1.
What is Smaug's favorite food?

1:Turkey
2:Chicken
3:Fish
4:Omurice

Question 2
What does Smaug love the most?

1:Food
2:Ilulu
3:Gold
4:Kanna

Question 3
How Long did Smaug sleep in Erebor before looking for Tohru?

1:10 years
2:45 years
3:30 years
4:I can't do math

Question 4
What did Smaug get Ilulu for christmas?

1:A book
2:A beating heart with their initials in it.
3:His love
4:Cookie.

Question 5
How did Smaug get his Scar on his left side?

Type in your answers

Question 6
Who is the best dragon?

1:Smaug
2:Smaug
3:Smaug
4:Smaug

Question 7
What does Smaug do to people who make Kanna Sad?

Type in your answers.

I'll give you guys the answers in the next episode.

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01-23-2022

2124 words