Eventually everyone retired to their rooms, most wanting to get in a good night’s sleep to wake up early in order to reach the airport. This left Stanley alone in the living room where he relegated himself to sleeping on the couch. This time he wasn’t playing videogames or browsing the internet on his laptop. No this time he opted not to distract himself from his thoughts since unlike the previous day his mind was no longer going to dark places. This was ultimately for the best since the subject of his thoughts hadn’t changed. As he lay on the couch in the darkened room staring at the ceiling his thoughts were encompassed by Ezraphel.

After a long while he voiced his overall synopsis of his thoughts “this relationship thing is fucking hard.”

Before all this started Stanley really thought he and Ezraphel had their relationship under control. Sure it wasn’t perfect by any stretch of either of their perspectives but they knew that. Their relationship was more a compromise than an ideal but they figured they would iron out the wrinkles with time. Sure problems would occur because of course they would but God damn Stanley thought he would be a bit more prepared when the other shoe dropped. That quote from an old insurance commercial came to mind at that moment.

“Life comes at you fast.”

And wasn’t that the truth.

Who the hell knew a weekend with some friends would do this much damage to six months of progress?

‘Fuck me, if that’s all it took then what does it say about that progress in the first place?’

It reminded Stanley of the reason why he was not interested in relationships or having an intimate relationship with anyone in the first place. He vocally used the excuse of it being a waste of time or a bad investment and people would think he was just making excuses because he was unattractive and had a terrible personality but neither was really true. In the end all the reasons he gave for not wanting intimacy are excuses for the real reason.

That reason being a genuine lack of interest.

The thing is even if Stanley was always as attractive as he currently is he still wouldn’t be in an intimate relationship. He could certainly see himself giving it a try but ultimately breaking it off down the line and not trying again for many years if ever again. Why did he think this? Because after thinking about it, if Ezraphel was a normal woman Stan would have broken off the relationship a long time ago. Even now there was a part of him that just did not want to deal with this. He told Ezraphel that he wouldn’t give up on their relationship and it was true. Stanley genuinely wanted to make this thing work out but there was no mistake that he didn’t necessarily have a choice in that respect.

‘I’m locked in…I’ve been locked in to this relationship the moment she landed in my backyard.’

The thought came with a bitterness he hadn’t felt in a very long time followed by thoughts centered on the scenario of what if Ezraphel had not entered his life. There was no doubt that Ezraphel’s presence had been an overall positive influence on him. It was to the point where he couldn’t imagine a life without her…until now. What that life would be Stan knew it wouldn’t be good. Stan’s life without Ezraphel would be one of stagnancy, bitterness, self loathing and loneliness. He wouldn’t be a better man without her, he wouldn’t be a happy man without her…but he would be content.

Had he not resigned himself to wallow in the stagnant filth that was his life before?

Had he not consigned himself to living out the rest of his days doing what he genuinely enjoyed until his death?

Had he not already went ahead and drawn up a will that would see his wealth and worldly possessions distributed accordingly to the only family who gave a damn about him and had his best interest at heart?

The answer was yes to all those things but now all that ‘effort’ was rendered moot. He now had responsibilities he never wanted and worse a good chunk of said responsibility went beyond the scope of a normal relationship. He felt pressured and as history had shown Stanley Berkowitz did not handle high pressure situations well. The last time he truly felt pressured was back in college with his grades, his peers, his parents, society and the uncertain future. In the end he gave up on a normal life and became a recluse.

Unfortunately giving up and cutting his losses wasn’t an option here so where does that leave him?

He pinched the bridge of his nose ‘god fucking dammit Ez.’

Through this one act of hers Ezraphel has exposed the fact that their relationship failed the ‘litmus test’ so to speak. Their first time going out as a couple for more than a few hours and Ezraphel ended up corrupting someone and revealing her secret.

This incident with Amelia was just the straw that broke the camel’s back. He could certainly attempt to re-establish the status quo to before the weekend but he recognized how counterproductive that would be. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. He sees it now, how he’s been clinging onto the lifestyle he cultivated before Ezraphel showed up through sheer stubbornness and willful ignorance. He’s been staving off the change trying to fit Ezraphel into his life like a child attempting to push a square peg into a circular hole.

Fucking insanity.

‘Was I really that fucking delusional?’

Of course it wouldn’t work and deep down he knew that but he didn’t feel ready, he wanted the fantasy to last just a while longer. Now the bubble has popped and reality was setting in which was ironic considering the actual fantastical elements of this whole debacle.

‘Okay problem recognized, sort of, now how do I fix it?’

Well it’s already been established that he needed to change and the same thing can be said for Ezraphel. As much of schizoid weeb who wasn’t quite aware of what an actual healthy relationship looked like Stanley could at least identify that some of the stuff he and Ezraphel engaged in were not so healthy in the first place. For instance even someone like him can recognize that Ezraphel’s fixation on him was a problem. He knew this for a long time now but he excused it as her being a Mamono and their culture being different. Then he remembered this was the same culture that venerates mind control, rape and pedophilia.

Fuck Mamono culture.

So naturally the first order of business was to have Ezraphel appropriate more human culture into her life. And this time he wouldn’t just stick her on a laptop and have the internet do the heavy lifting. Of course this meant that Stanley would need to actively change his lifestyle too because clearly preserving his previous lifestyle wasn’t working out so well. In truth it hadn’t been working so well even before all of this but that’s just something he would have to deal with.

How fortunate for him then that she would announce her intent to go on some kind of globetrotting tour with Amelia. As much as the thought of leaving her alone with Amelia over a protracted period made him feel he couldn’t say that the woman didn’t have the right of it. This may sound hypocritical but Ezraphel really needed to get out more. People think it’s easy to be a recluse who has single digit averages when it came to human interactions over several months but it wasn’t so. Anyone can go out and meet new people but you have to be built different to not really be bothered by solitude.

Ezraphel was just not built like that.

‘Alright so Operation: Switch Up is a go’ he thought with a snort ‘Ezraphel has her tour plans and I have to change my lifestyle. Can I actually do that?’

Honestly aside from Airsoft, Ezraphel and his family there wasn’t much in this world as far as he knew that could consistently take him away from his PC.

At least that was the case before yesterday.

Raising a hand over his face Stanley concentrated and within moments a dark purple flame-like miasma enveloped his hand.

‘Yep I’m magic now.’

Well he’s been magic since he became an Incubus and technically that’s not magic so much as its Demonic Energy. It’s always been there but he couldn’t really access it like this until he had an aneurysm out of sheer stupidity. Stanley made the occasional joke that Ezraphel was going to put him the in the hospital with her antics but this time she almost did it. That’s right Ezraphel pissed him off so much that he gained an actual rage boost enabling him to manifest mana like a shounen character.

And speaking of his errant girlfriend…

“Are you waiting to make a dramatic entrance or something? Get out here” he spoke with a scowl while extinguishing the dark flame of mana.

A moment later Ezraphel literally stepped out of the shadows with a look of contemplation.