Everyone in the Lever family’s barn is NAKED!

Wow! Everyone? Naked? I guess this is gonna be a pretty sexy sexy chapter, huh? With a whole barn full of NAKED people!?

Well, guess again. They’re just going to stand around talking the whole time. 

And who said it was a barn full of naked people anyway? There’s only three of them in there. Just three naked, talkative people in a barn. At least they’re three sexy naked talkative people. So there is that. I get pretty aroused sometimes just inventing them. 

So who are these people and why are they so nude?

Rutt the Minotaur! He’s a murderous mountain of man-bull with a cock seven inches wide and thirty five inches long. Over forty people have tragically died while Rutt’s tried to shove it up them, but the psychological issues he’s carrying around right now are more related to his failure to protect a merchant caravan from space robots.

He’s naked because that’s how he sleeps. He’s just woken up.

Tatiana the Milkmaid! The golden child of the village! Loved by all for her positive attitude, work ethic, kindness, friendly personality and 36J slutbags. She’s going through a lot of life adjustments lately, such as becoming the lover of her non-binary sibling, Nikola, and the sex slave of the Minotaur.

She’s naked because there’s not much point in getting dressed when going straight from the bed where you’ve been masturbating your girlybrother to the barn where you’ll masturbate your Minotaur.

A tree!

She’s naked because she’s a tree.

Not just any old tree though. A dryad. A tree animated and personified by a conscious nymphic spirit. The tree was speaking by making mouths appear on the pears hanging from its branches. Nobody liked that.

“You got a humanoid form?” the Minotaur asked.

“Yes,” said a pear.

“Use it.”

The dryad manifested her nymph body. The three naked people were now three naked humanoid people.

A big-dicked Minotaur, a big-titted Milkmaid, and a short, fat naked girlie with pear-green skin, a round face, and pretty eyes.

“Wow, you’re cute!” said the Milkmaid. She was sat on the Minotaur’s dick. It wasn’t up her cunny, because there was no way it could fit, but she was perched atop it like a parrot on a pirate.

The dryad was really cute. She had a bashful expression, big brown eyes, and a most huggable and curvy little figure. 

“Damn, you’re fat,” said the Minotaur.

“She’s thicc,” said Tatiana.

“You’re thicc. This cunt is fat,” Rutt clarified, then prodded the dryad in her round belly, “You’re what my father liked then, are you? Fat bitches with saggy teats?”

The dryad had been part of his father’s harem. And it was a little unfair to call her teats saggy. They were only drooping a little.

“Crackerjack liked all kinds of pussy,” the dryad said. Which wasn’t quite true. The Great Minotaur Hero Francis Crackerjack enjoyed girlies of all different body shapes, but they all had to be dryads or nymphs or wood elves or something foresty. Crackerjack had thought a harem should have a strong theme.

“And what’s your name?”

“Ubi-Ibi-Ibi-Ubi-Obi-Ubi-Ubi-Ubi-Ibi-Obi-Ubi,” said the dryad.

“I’m going to call you Ubi-Ibi!” said Tatiana.

“I’m going to call you Peartree,” said Rutt.

“I might just do that too,” said Tatiana.

Tatiana really liked the look of Peartree. She looked a really sweet and friendly girl. Tatiana needed more girlie friends. She was only really close to Joanna, and Joanna was a filthy slut who whored her asshole out for fairy books. Tatiana didn’t judge Joanna for that incident, but it would be nice to have some girlie friends who weren’t filthy sluts. And Peartree looked super wholesome!

“Did you say you wanted to be a mommy to my boyfriend?” the Milkmaid asked.

“Yes, that’s right. I’ve been searching for Rutt his whole life so I can be his mommy!”

Tatiana clapped her hands together happily.

“That’s so nice! Last night I started being a good mommy to my little girlybrother.” She gave her own left titty a playful, demonstrative squeeze, “It was real nice! She sucked this titty so good.”

Peartree smiled a confused but happy smile. She wasn’t sure she understood the family dynamics that the Milkmaid was trying to explain, but they sounded like they were based in love.

“This is such fucking manshit,” said the man-bull. “You’ve been searching for me my whole life? You wanna be my mommy? Manshit, bitch.”

Tatiana sensed something almost vulnerable in her master’s voice.

“What don’t you believe, babe? That this nice tree has been looking for you, or that she wants to be your mommy?”

“Any of this fucking crap. She’s a dryad, for Priapus’ sake! She can make her little magic tree grow wherever she wants. I’m over fifty years old. If this fat little cunt had been looking for me she’d have found me years ago.”

“Um… you’ve been kind of hard to reach, to be honest,” said Peartree, “Most of your life you spent in the desert lands of Ligature, where I can’t manifest my tree for ecological reasons. And for a long time you were fighting in the Idea Wars, which I couldn’t reach because it’s outside of Linear Time.”

She sounded really sad.

“Okay, fine,” said Rutt, “So maybe you were looking for me. But, like, what the fuck, bitch? Who the fuck asked you to? You’ve been stalking me to be my mommy? You know that’s not how Minotaurs work, right? You know what my real mommy is? What kind of womb I crawled from?”

“Crackerjack told me the legend of the Last Labyrinth, yes. I was his best bitch and knew all his secrets. I know of the Tauriarch. I know that you were born of a mama with no titties, and that made me so sad that I had to find you and offer you my own.”

Peartree’s words were unfamiliar to Tatiana but the feeling in them melted her heart. She didn’t know what a ‘Tauriarch’ was, but it was the saddest thing to think of her beautiful monster boyfriend being born to a mama with no titties. She wanted to give Rutt hers. She wanted him to accept Peartree’s. She wanted so much good titty for her man.

Rutt slapped Peartree’s tit hard from underneath.

“No way. No way does a self-aware tree go on a fifty-year quest to become a Minotaur’s mommy. It’s just not the kind of shit trees do.”

“I loved your father so much. Everyone in his harem did. He was the finest man, the noblest hero, and the most passionate lover these Lands ever knew. When he died… when he passed to the Last Labyrinth… I couldn’t bear it. I couldn’t accept it. But I knew I didn’t have to. I knew he went to the Last Labyrinth to sire a son. All I had to do was find that son… to find you… and be your mommy.”

Rutt looked hard at his Milkmaid.

“What did you think happens now?” he asked Tatiana, “What do you think happens to my fat green mommy?”

Tatiana thought about her boyfriend.

She thought about the inferiority issues he was dealing with after the Merchant Massacre.

She thought about his values and his emotional coping strategies.

She thought about how a man like him must feel about a lauded father he’d never met.

The Milkmaid looked at the pretty, plump dryad sadly.

“I think you’re going to brutally rape her,” Tatiana told Rutt.

Peartree gasped.

Rutt chuckled.

“Ha! You’re half right, girly girl,” he said, “We’re gonna brutally rape her.”