A monotonous, meaningless life.

All my movements are watched and criticized.

I can't do anything without people watching me.

That's my life.

The life of the successor princess to the throne; Christina Von Teria.

***

I can't remember since when I realized my life wasn't normal.

It always seemed common for people to gather around me and watch my every move.

- ”That's how everyone lives, " I thought.

As I grew, all the unnecessary attention began to become oppressive.

I wanted to feel free.

Why?

Why don't you leave me alone?

I don't want to be seen.

Get away from me.

Please, please.

Nobody listened to me.

A life surrounded by unnecessary attention is what I would have.

Every look at me annoys me and makes me feel insecure.

Or so I thought…

Maybe it wasn't the looks that bothered me.

If not who they were looking behind me.

Were you looking at Christina?

Or did they look at the successor princess to the throne?

Those were the questions I asked anyone who contacted me.

I guess it was too much to ask to be looked at as I really am, not with the legacy I have behind me.

It's only natural that people don't look at me.

I'm just someone else who will be put on the list of succession to the throne.

It's normal.…

Completely normal…

- "Hello!”

It was a completely unknown voice that drew my attention.

It was a normal day while I was at the edge of the castle.

I always enjoyed having tea in this place as it was as free as I could feel.

Until an inadvertent voice burst into silence.

As I lowered my gaze I could see a boy talking to me through a small hole in the wall.

By the position of my body and chair, his face seemed to hide from the gaze of butlers and maids.

By looking at the boy better I could see a misaligned appearance, with messy hair and somewhat battered clothes.

Commoner.

It was the perfect representation of an ordinary commoner that my teachers taught me.

I had various lessons because of my position, and one of them was how to interact with these kinds of people.

- ”You mustn't speak to them."

- "They are inferior people to us“

- ”You can't let it touch you even a hair."

They were instructions that had been instilled in me so hard.

These are unbreakable rules.

Even I couldn't go against them.

- "Who are you?”

But there I was blinded by a new discovery leaving aside the guidelines that had been dictated to me.

- "John, my name is John!”

The boy still staying close to the hole spoke to me in a somewhat excited voice.

- "Hey, hey ... how do you live in such a big place?”

The boy seemed more interested in the castle I was in ... his intentions leaked easily.

He was impressed with the castle.

- "Hey, hey, what are you doing?”

- "Huh?”

I leaked a shameful voice due to the sudden change of subject.

The boy had stopped seeing the castle to see me and the tea on the table.

- "As you can see I find myself enjoying an afternoon of-”

- "Hey, hey, what's your name?”

Interrupting me in a somewhat rude way the boy had asked a new question.

This time he was staring at me.

It was kind of weird.

But ... curiously, I didn't feel restless.

It was almost like ... the look I'd always wanted to get.

- "Fufu~, Christina my name is Christina Von Teria”

- "Ooooh!”

The boy seemed impressed by my presentation.

- "Nice to meet you, Chris!”

- "Oh?”

The boy seemed to have changed to a friendlier tone.

Which changed my face to a slight smile.

- "It's nice to meet you, John.”

It was the moment I changed my life.

It was the first day I met John.

***

From that moment on John would come to see me every day without fail.

We used to talk a lot.

They weren't talking about awesome topics.

Rather they were a barrage of questions unilaterally by John.

John seemed to live in a house a little far from the castle.

He happened to run into the hole in the wall and that's when he saw me.

John asked a lot of questions about my lifestyle.

It was funny to see him amazed by every little thing.

Anything that seemed banal to me for John was something extraordinary.

John's talks stopped being a simple questionnaire and became more interesting and profound.

Or at least for me.

Thanks to the talks with him I became aware of the difference between royalty and ordinary people.

John changed the way I see the world.

With him, I managed to have the freedom I had always dreamed of.

Through it, I could see the outside.

So I decided to do something for John, too.

Since education was solely and exclusively for royalty, I decided to share with John everything I knew.

I brought my books and slowly explained to John everything I knew.

It was difficult mainly because John had no idea of anything.

But little by little he was learning.

Now he could add up large amounts.

I also taught him to read.

It was fun to watch him learn a little more every day.

A friendship between a princess and a commoner.

People would go crazy if they found out.

But I don't care.

In this place, only John and I exist.

It's our own world.

Here our friendship is freely allowed…

Or maybe not just that…

***

The years passed and I grew up.

I went from being a child to becoming a woman with one foot in adulthood.

Although I wasn't the only one who grew up.

John had grown up too.

He went from having around and childish face to having a more sharp and masculine appearance.

Although his hair grew a little, he still had the messy style that I liked so much.

His clothes, despite being mistreated, still looked good in him.

Even though the years passed our relationship remained the same.

Every day I would definitely come here and talk to John.

Our evenings of questions and teachings were over.

John already knew everything I could teach him.

But now our conversations had changed to be more personal.

John told me about his day, about his family, about his friends.

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little jealous, though my jealousy might have changed a bit.

I stopped being jealous of his freedom to feel jealous of the people who can be with him.

- "What I would give to be out with him one day.”

It was one of the phrases I kept in my heart the most.

Even if we only talked for a few hours, I felt full.

Even if we kept quiet it was still a perfect time.

Just being with John makes me feel at peace…

But this isn't just friendship.

I've grown and my feelings have been shaped.

I know how I feel about John is not just friendship.

This is love.

We've grown up together and we know everything about each other.

And yet I still want to know more about him.

This is definitely love.

And while I wouldn't like to be disappointed, I know how John feels about me is exactly the same.

But because John is a little clueless, he probably hasn't noticed yet.

Fufu ~ just thinking about John is enough to laugh like that.

What if John and I got married?

I'd like to have a house in the mountains.

Besides, I'd like to have a girl and a boy.

I'd like to spend our adulthood and old age together.

Although I can only dream it.

I am more aware than ever of our position.

I can't do anything.

This is useless.

- "Hey Chris, if you become queen what would you do?”

It was John's sudden question that got me out of my depression.

Having grown up together I also taught John about our position.

I remember seeing him ashamed of how he had spoken amicably to me in the past.

Though that doesn't matter to me…

What would I do if I became queen?

- "I think I would like to implement laws and rights that benefit commoners.”

A just government would step into a new era.

And maybe ... just maybe ... the queen's right to marry whomever she wanted.

Yes!

- "You're a genius, John!“

- "Huh?”

John just a word like he doesn't understand anything.

I don't care that you don't understand right now.

Someday.

- ”Someday it'll all work out, John."

John shook his head even without understanding what I want to say to him.

But I just stare at myself and talk.

- "No matter what you do I will always support you"

Through his eyes, I could see the strong decision.

Grab one of John's hands.

Despite spending many years together we hadn't done it very often.

- "Thank you, John.”

I know you always supported me.

We know each other.

I know that our love will overcome everything.

Because you are my other half that heaven sent me.

With John, I could do anything.

The problem is, I wouldn't know what to do when John was no longer with me.

***

My biggest fear came true.

It was a day like any other.

I was sitting over tea waiting for John's arrival.

The arrival never came.

Since that day John stopped coming.

No matter how long I waited, I never heard from him.

- "He abandoned me." That's what I thought.…

Maybe John had someone he really loved.

I don't know anything about him, so he probably went somewhere else.

But why all this sudden?

Why didn't he tell me anything?

Was he just playing with my feelings?

Maybe only I had thought we were meant for each other.

Ridiculously.

I'm ridiculous.

Idiot.

***

It's been a few months since John disappeared.

The king -my father spoke to me.

Apparently, I was engaged to the prince of another kingdom.

If I were the girl from months ago, I would have vehemently refused.

But I'm not the girl I used to be.

- ”Ok father."

I had no strength or courage to refuse.

No matter what I do, nothing will change.

---

Days passed and I met the prince.

He was a handsome boy with blond hair and blue eyes.

Though his mouth he uttered words of love, his eyes only coveted my body.

How sad.

The people of the castle only see my position.

And this idiot prince only sees my body.

What idiocy.

***

The wedding with the prince was approaching.

Everything proceeded flawlessly.

Although we were officially engaged there was no contact beyond a few exchanges of words.

I felt contaminated being in the same place as him.

The wedding progressed and the day arrived.

I was surrounded by maids who made touch-ups to my dress.

I could see myself in a mirror and I could only notice a woman without expression.

Since when I don't smile?

I don't know.

Despite the passing of time, I still think about John.

Why John?

Why did you leave me?

If you had fallen in love with someone, why didn't you tell me?

Not knowing anything about you is what hurts me the most.

After the touch-ups, I was alone in the dressing room.

I don't think about anything anymore.

My life from now on won't matter to me.

* Knock * * knock*

Someone knocked on the door and it was the king.

When he entered it only noticed that I was perfectly sitting in a chair.

- "My daughter I am very proud of your wedding”

- "Thank you, father.”

I have nothing more to say.

- "You are about to live a new life with your beloved beside you”

'Beloved' haha.

- "Ever since I got to see Prince Louis, I knew he'd be the perfect man for you.”

- "Yes father“

The king looked away from me as he approached the window with a view of the wall.

He had a distant look as he spoke.

- "Despite talking to that commoner, I'm proud you haven't changed your responsibilities.”

Although his tone didn't change, his face kept a smile.

A rotten smile.

- "What?”

Words came out of my mouth as I was paralyzed.

- "You know it's a disgrace to talk to the commoners but I was in time to get him away from you and keep him from infecting you with his bad influence.”

The king took words out of his mouth, but I didn't care anymore.

It was him.

He was the culprit.

He took me away from what I loved most.

I couldn't control my anger.

*Crack*

I don't remember what happened.

I looked around and could only see blood on the ground and the inert king to the side.

Look at the scissors in my hand.

Those that had been used to touch up the dress were now stained with blood.

I did.

I never expected this but I did.

Although h never behaved like a father I did not hate him, rather I was indifferent to him.

Now he's dead.

- "Now I am the queen”

***

A few weeks have passed since the king's death.

When I became the queen, I silenced all information and spread rumors about an alleged disease that killed the king.

I would become mandatory with every right.

My next step was to cancel the wedding to the prince.

Their kingdom seemed to be angry and threatened us to break relationships.

It's not important.

His kingdom was an inferior kingdom.

We were just on good terms to avoid trouble.

But that doesn't matter anymore.

My final mandate was to find John.

According to the words of my father he was exiled from the kingdom and his home was destroyed.

Remembering that made my blood boil.

I sent spies to the border of the surrounding kingdoms in search of John.

I needed to find him.

I won't lose him this time.

***

It's been 5 years since I ordered find John.

Evidence was found that John was in a neighboring kingdom bordering on the right of our kingdom.

According to what was collected after being exiled and having migrated to another kingdom his parents died.

They were sick people.

It broke my heart to know John had been through so much.

But it doesn't matter.

When he's back with me, his life will change.

His status will be superior.

The queen's consort.

He will have royal highness status.

- "Excuse me my queen we have located the town where the comm- Prince John are located”

- "All right, take me there.”

- "Excuse my queen, but-”

- "Take me there.”

- "As you wish”

Following the knight, he led me to John's residence my heart kept beating.

A reunion after more than 5 years.

I've changed a lot.

My body has matured and my hair is even longer than when I was with John.

How much has John changed in my absence?

Will he be taller?

Maybe he can be more muscular, although I've always liked his slim appearance.

No matter how it is now I will love him.

- "Excuse my queen thanks to testimonies of neighbors it is presumed that Prince John lives in that house over there”

After the knight pointed towards a place I could see the house.

It wasn't a big house.

It seemed to be cozy.

The house seemed to have overlapped with the house I once dreamed of having.

The door suddenly opened while we stayed away.

I could see John come out.

He seemed to have matured, he was taller and has a more adult face.

In spite of making being a serious face, I could still see vestiges of that smile that I liked to see.

After John came out, a woman followed him…

Immediately my alerts rang.

My head wanted to turn; I didn't want to see what was coming.

The woman held her hands clasped to two small children…

No more than 2 years old they seemed to be fraternal twins.

They were a boy and a girl.

- "No...”

- "My queen?”

-“No... No... no... no... no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no”

I began to deny hard as I shook my head.

Please don't do this to me. Please don't do this to me.

John ... John!

My dream vividly overlapped with reality but this time I was not next to John but that woman.

- "Is my queen all right?”

The knight next to me was still worried.

But I couldn't reason anymore.

I am tired.

I'm tired of losing everything.

I don't want to lose anything this time.

- "Burn down the house.”

I didn't think much about the political problems this would create.

I didn't care what would happen next.

They won't take away my beloved.

- "Will you support me, John?”

You promised.

Please, John.

- "Please look at me”

 

---

                                                                                                    

This is the story of the origin of the war between the kingdom of Teria and the kingdom of Dodel.

The cruelest war at the hands of the tyrant Christina Von Teria.