Chapter 12
Come And Put The Blame On Me

“I’m delighted to see you’ve decided to grace us with your presence again,” Octavia said with a disarming honesty as I let her inside. She looked around curiously. Pancakes raised his head from where he’d fallen asleep in front of the fire, sleepy indignation in his eyes. “Your brother not home?”

“No, he had to head out for a few days. Uh, cousin.”

“Sure,” Tavi said. “Anyway, he mentioned you might be returning this-a-way, so I’ve been wondering if you’d like to head into town. With me.”

“Oh!” I’d been planning to do some observations and see if I could learn anything about my wolfish predicament. I hadn’t even had a chance to get a look at the sigils that must’ve been burned into the wood, and what more I might learn from it. 

On the other hand, getting out of the house for a bit and among other people did sound nice. Especially if I got to do it as Maya. I was more comfortable around others for some reason, like it was easier to be genuine when I didn’t have to be scared about creeping people out. 

“Uh, sure!” I said. “Anything in particular?” I went to grab my coat, when my stomach growled, and I had to give Tavi a sheepish smile. I hadn’t gotten around to actually eating yet. She put her hands on her hips and raised an eyebrow. 

“Am I going to have to make you eat, girl?” she asked, and then fished in her bag. “Here, folks have been meaning to hand these to you.” She retrieved a loaf of bread wrapped in cloth, several jars of preserved fruits, and what looked like weird misshapen purple carrots. “Well, to your cousin, but to you both, I suppose. He keeps waltzing into town, helping people, and then scurrying off before folks can say thanks.” 

She put them all on the counter. “I… thank you,” I mumbled. It hadn’t really occurred to me to really… get paid. People had occasionally stuffed something in my hands as a thanks for what I’d done for them, but I was already grateful for the fact that people seemed to be putting up with me being around in general. This was… “It’s too much,” I mumbled. 

“Nonsense,” Tavi said. “That’s not even a large part of it, neither. You and your cousin provide a service to our little town, now, and we’re aching to express our gratitude.” She took a step closer. “So that’s them sorted. As for me…” I swallowed nervously as she took off her coat and folded it over the back of a chair, then stood in front of me. What was she planning? 

Nervousness turned into weird excited anxiety when she put her hands on both my shoulders. “Wh—” I said, like a poet. She looked at me with that little mischievous smirk and those eyes, and for a moment I felt like she was about to close the distance a whole lot more. Then she steered me to… the same chair. 

“Sit,” she said. “We’re not doing anything or leaving at all until you’ve had something to eat.” She turned around and opened a few drawers until she found a knife she was happy with. “I’ll make you something quick and easy for the road, we can get you some soup or stew when we’ve reached town.” 

I hadn’t expected that. And a part of me really, really didn’t like what was happening. Sitting down while an (admittedly very beautiful) woman cooked a meal for me was strangely abhorrent to me. It reeked of the kind of relationships I’d seen my older relatives have, which framed me in the position of a kind of paterfamilias. No matter how much I looked like a woman, that role was not one I was familiar with. “No,” I said, and stood up. 

She spun around, realised she had the knife still out and now pointed at me, and then put it down. “No?” She frowned in confusion. “You don’t trust me to make a decent meal, Maya?” I bit my lip and tried to find a way to express how I felt without hurting her feelings, which seemed dangerously close to happening now. 

“That’s… that’s not it,” I said. “I just… don’t like… people doing things for me.” That was true at least, even if it was coming out extremely stilted. “I want to help. I can help. I’m not… I’m not so helpless that I can’t take care of myself, if that’s what you’re thinking.”

“Not at all, Maya,” she said, leaning against the counter. “I’m just wanting to repay kindness with kindness is all.” I took a step closer and put a hand on her arm. For a second I was worried she’d pull away, but other than what appeared to be the slightest jolt, all she did in response was look away. Her cheeks reddened, but I didn’t know if that was out of embarrassment or frustration. 

“I’m sorry,” I said. “This is just… not a kind of…” I was trying to find the words. “I have a really hard time accepting acts of service like this. I really do appreciate it.” I perked up a little. “Why don’t we both make something for the road. Have you eaten yet?” 

She shook her head. “Something small, last night, but nothing substantial this morning yet. I figured I’d eat when I got back.” I nodded, then grabbed the loaf of bread. 

“Then how about we both make something, and we see what we feel like on the road?” I offered. “That way, the both of us are being productive and I don’t feel like…” I hesitated. ‘Like I’m taking advantage of you,’ was what I wanted to say, but that felt deeply unpleasant to even say out loud. 

“Like you need others to take care of you?” Tavi offered, her expression softening. “I can respect that. It isn’t easy.” She flipped the knife in her hands and offered me the handle. “Let us make breakfast together then.” She found another as I stepped up to the counter next to her. 

Elbow to elbow, both of us were busy cutting up vegetables and salted meat in relative silence. I couldn’t help but blush at the domesticity of the situation. “Thank you,” I mumbled. 

“Don’t mention it,” she said. “What… what is that?”

“Oh, uh… a sandwich.”

“A sand what?” 

“Sandwich. It’s named after someone from… uh… where I’m from.”

“A witch?”

“Not quite.” I chuckled. “It’s complicated.” I looked at my construction. I’d made a sandwich with cheese, dried tomatoes and salted pork, and then frown. It was missing something. “I wish I had mayo,” I mumbled. “Maybe aioli.” Another not-understanding look from Tavi. “Uh… Mayonnaise and Aioli are a kind of… flavoured… sauce.”

“For sand witches?”

“Well, not just that. Goes well with potatoes, too.” 

Octavia smiled. “I feel there’s a lot we might learn from one another, Maya. I wish you’d stay a bit longer this time. I would love to learn more about the food where you’re from.” I looked over at what she’d made. Well, it was definitely a salad, although it did have more bread in it than the usual fare. I didn’t even know I had mason jars. “It doesn’t look like much,” she added, "but you keep that dry and cool, and it’ll keep well.” She tossed a slab of pork on top. “And now it’s perfect,” she added with a grin. 

“You can eat that on the go?” I asked a little skeptically. She just nodded.

“Aye. I’ve had to make a lot of meals that keep on the road. Helping out on the fields with Da, there’s not always time to head into the house, after all.” She wrapped it all in cloth and put it back in her bag, and my sandwiches too when I handed them to her. “All done?”

I nodded. That made sense. I’d worked a very un-unionised job a few years ago that had demanded impossible hours and even more effort. I had spent a lot of ‘lunches’ just shoving something into my mouth before immediately heading back to the work floor to keep quotas up. “Hard work, I take it?”

Octavia nodded. “But rewarding,” she said. “Ready?” 

I grabbed her coat and held it out for her. “Ready,” I said with a smile as she turned around. It felt strange, helping her with her coat, but weirdly pleasant. She did the same to me, like a weird pantomime we were both acting out, not quite managing to hide our amusement. I walked to the door and held it open for her, then nodded to Pan, who came running over enthusiastically. 

I had fashioned something like a harness for him. He was used to it anyway, and I didn’t like the idea of collaring him. He wasn’t going to know how to deal with the constricting feeling, and I was worried he might hurt himself somehow. For now, it was a weird kind of sleeveless jacket I’d made out of a ripped coat I’d found, but I knew I’d have to make something more sturdy and durable at some point. Octavia laughed when she saw it. 

“Your wolf is wearing clothes, now?” she chuckled. 

I hooked the leash onto the harness. “Yup,” I said, “it lets me keep him close by, and it doesn’t hurt him.” I offered it to her. “You want to walk him?” She gingerly accepted it, and held on to it, seemingly ready for Pancakes to take off running. Instead, he simply sat down next to her and curled his tail around his legs, his head held high. It was easy to see the cat in him when he posed like this. I definitely hadn’t seen dogs sit like that. 

“You’ve a particular animal,” Tavi said. “That coat of his looks like it’s seen better days, though.” We started towards the village, and Pan walked next to us, the line slack between him and Octavia. “Maybe we can see about going by the tailor, get him something fitted?”

“Oh, that’d be awesome! I need to go see him anyway!” I said excitedly, and then slunk in on myself a bit. I didn’t like exclaiming loudly. “Sorry.”

“What for?” she laughed. “You’re… precious, when you’re excited like that. Please, continue. What did you need to see Marcus for?” 

“I’m thinking of making some kind of formaldehyde solution, see if it might help with tanning. Of course, I don’t have a proper distillery set up, but with what I have I might be able to work something out. The different vegetable tanning oil I… asked my cousin to bring him worked, but I think we can do better.” I rubbed the back of my head. “I just… like helping where I can…” I mumbled. 

“And we all appreciate you for it, Maya. You and your brother both,” she nudged me as we walked down the snowy path. “We’re glad he finally decided to come down from his mountain, even if it was in a snow-delirious haze. And then brought you into it, too.” I couldn’t help but smile. 

“Thank you,” I mumbled. “I’ve never really been… you know… part of something like this.” My heart sank a bit when I realised it wasn’t going to last. Well, not really. In a few days I’d turn back into The Witch, my ‘cousin’, and I’d lose the sense of comfort I’d found. I’d just have to make the best of it.

“What has you so glum, Maya?” Well, clearly my pretending-everything-was-fine skills needed some fine-tuning. I shrugged.

“I just wish this could last… longer,” I said, trying not to reveal too much. The last thing I wanted was for them, for her to discover my true nature and drive me out for being… something like a wolf in women’s clothing. “I might have to leave for a month again,” I said. “But I’ll be back after that!”

“I was worried about that,” Tavi said. “And for what it’s worth, if there’s anything I can do to help you stay, say the word.” She blushed again, although I couldn’t tell if it was the cold or something else. “I quite enjoy having you around.”

“Having a couple of Witches around can definitely be useful, I imagine,” I said, “and Pan is a delight.”

“I wasn’t talking about Pan,” Octavia said. “Or your cousin.” 

“Oh.”

“I’d miss you if you left again.”

“Oh.”

She stopped and turned to me. I turned to her. She looked like a vision, her windswept hair against the snowy forest road. She reached out and tucked a stray strand of my hair behind my ear. “I suppose we’ll have to make do with the time we have.”

“Do… what?” I managed. She smiled, then turned back to the road with chipper playfulness. 

“Well, visit Marcus the Tailor, for one!” she said. “Coming?”

Elamimax

Gosh our MC is so dense >w<

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