Kobal’s Shit List 16
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Andrea awoke early with a smile on her face. That smile stayed steady when she got out of bed and tripped on her boot. That smile stayed steady when she stubbed her toe on the chair. That smile only grew as she checked the interface for messages and found that she still had zero suitors.

Nothing could wipe away that smile.

She was intrigued by how intoxicating the idea of a private meeting with Tanner was. In comparison, she had been excited about meeting with Kobal, but this trumped that.

The strangest thing about it was she also had a fire in her gut that refused to fade. She didn't think of the dud E in a sexual way—not really—yet she couldn't deny that she had loved being in the man's grip.

Whatever she might have thought, her body wasn't listening.

In time she calmed enough to seek out her clothes and ready herself. She encountered one problem, however; her "new" clothes, bought a month prior, barely fit.

"Come on...come on..." she chanted as she tried to button her trousers. It was to no avail.

Their meeting was drawing near, so she decided to admit defeat and put on her old clothes. It was nice while it lasted, at least—being stealth, being lean, feeling small. Tanner had even shielded her with his own body and had tried to make her laugh a time or two.

Guess that's what it means to be a real beauty.

Although the recovery had been quite awful, she made a mental note of putting "unsure" next to the same operation on the list of things she would do to be slim, rather than "never again."

After ten minutes of searching, Andrea came to a grim realization: she had no clothes. The new, smaller clothes were there, but the older ones that used to fit her weren't. She couldn't borrow anything from anyone; she didn't want anybody to know that she had no clothes and no means to buy some.

Her brain worked a mile a minute as she tried to figure out where she could have put them. Then she caught sight of the opera poster by the door and her blood ran cold. She hadn't touched that poster or the one above her bed that she had to look up to at night as she tried to sleep.

Now she got the message.

Now she understood why and when someone had been in her room. They had taken her old clothes and replaced them with these posters. She'd gained too much weight, and now she would have to go naked.

"No," she moaned. "Not today, not when things seemed to be picking up."

This wasn't the time to go there squeezed into trousers that could barely close. The prospect of her pants perhaps splitting during a training session terrified her.

What's the alternative? Cancel? Can I really cancel on someone who's taking the time to actually show me something? Like Kobal cancelled on me? She concluded that she really couldn't.

She didn't know what it would take, but she had to find clothes that fit. She had to strike a deal with her mother for her to take some pity on her.

Pity and mercy were two things Marian wasn't known for, but Andrea prayed that her luck was changing.

She squeezed into the clothes the best she could and hurried down the hall to her mother's office. She knew her mother was awake. Marian was always the earliest one up each day. Andrea was certain that that woman had reached a level of evil that afforded her the added advantage of not requiring sleep.

Andrea was right. When she arrived, Marian answered pleasantly enough and bade her in.

Andrea kept her head hung and her voice soft and humble. "Good morning, ma'am."

Marian scowled, disgusted by the sight of her. "Your thighs are rubbing together again, I see."

Andrea didn't answer; she knew her mother wasn't finished.

"There's no use coming here to beg. I've already thrown all the other ones out."

Andrea was surprised but kept her head hung, knowing that if she showed any emotion, Marian would have too much power over her.

"With all due respect, I have some money left. I...I'd like permission to take this month's pay a bit early so that I can buy something or...or order something."

"And you won't be getting that permission. You know that."

Despite the pause, Marian didn't go into one of her usual tirades or self-righteous speeches about self-control.

She was done.

The matter was finished.

It was closed. Marian turned in her chair to retrieve a diskette from the shelf behind her and said nothing further.

Andrea wanted to leave, but her feet weren't listening. "Ma'am. I—"

"I know you can speak the Common, Andrea. English is the only language you ever learned. And I also know that you heard me."

Somewhere along the lines, throughout everything, Andrea had started seeing her mother's interest in her weight as a nice gesture. She knew it wasn't true. When Marian'd humiliate her, or throw Andrea's food down on the floor in front of her as a child, when Marian'd scold her for sneaking a snack, when the woman came into Andrea's bedroom and punch her until there were bruises on her body because she had a cookie under her covers—Andrea saw that all as Marian doing something motherly. Marian'd said as much before, and Andrea had actually believed it. Being overweight in the Colony, something that was very rare to see, was quite dangerous. Sometimes Andrea felt that if Marian truly hated her, she would just unchain the fridge and allow Andrea to eat her way into oblivion.

Andrea understood her mother; she understood those actions, so when she spoke, she tried to convey that. Because even though her mother's actions were in some ways acts of kindness, she couldn't accept that offer now.

"You've always tried to take care of me, Mother. I know that. I've let you down time and time again, and for that I'm sorry. But please do not leave me to roam naked."

"You are not naked." Marian regarded her as if she were unreal. "Do you know how many people die in this colony every day? Do you know how many of them simply starve to death every damn day? And you? Your problem is that you can't keep your damn hands out of the cookie jar. You are a spoiled child. A parasite suckling off us, and I'm putting a stop to it. I am sick of putting up with you. Nearly twenty sheets of high-quality paper on your desk are unaccounted for. You have no pay this month. The clothes you previously had, they were mine. The new ones are yours; they were bought with your money, and if you need a large size, you will have to wait until your next payday and buy them then like everybody else."

Andrea was proud of herself for not giving anything away. She didn't let her mother see how much those words hurt or that she was desperate for clothes that fit today. For any clothes that could fit.

"I have some funds—"

"No," the woman answered.

"I know you—"

Marian sat up like a bolt. "You don't know anything! Absolutely nothing."

"The money here is my money anyway! I can buy whatever I want." Andrea took a step back as soon as the reality of what she'd said came into focus "I didn't mean that."

"Yes." Marian sat back. "I think you did mean it. I think you believe I'm freeloading off you. I think you meant I am the one who costs more than everybody else while being the least productive. I think that's what you meant."

Andrea hadn't intended to get her mother to stand, but somewhere in the yelling the woman had gotten to her feet. Andrea closed her eyes, ready to cry because it couldn't possibly lead to a good outcome.

"I...I meant no disrespect. I...I...I'm sorry. I meant no disrespect," Andrea muttered.

Marian's hateful expression made her face look twisted, and in the dimly lit room, she was a fright. "Since you don't like these clothes," she began.

Andrea brought her hands up, attempting to soothe her. "I did not say that. I...I'm all right with them."

"No." Marian reached into her desk for a large pair of scissors. "It's not the designer clothing you're used to. I know. But I'll see if I can't spruce it up."

As she approached, Andrea took a step back, voice quivering as she begged, "Mother, please...."

"I didn't kick you out after he died, did I? I didn't make you leave and go find money on your own, did I? All that I asked you to do was to keep your mouth clean and your waistline from expanding, but you couldn't do those two simple little things!"

***

Tanner wasn't very familiar with the culture of the area, so he wondered to himself why he'd be alone after offering his training services that morning. He sat on the same part of the wall as he had the night before. Time dragged on. He was supposed to meet up with Andrea forty-five minutes ago. He reasoned that he'd wait until the very end just to be sure there wasn't any miscommunication on his part.

The first wail drew him from his thoughts. Another cry broke through the stillness of the morning, rousing several people from their tasks. Tanner sat, quite comfortable on his perch, and waited.

With each second, the sound drew nearer. He jumped to his feet when the matriarch, the slender woman Tanner thought had little physical power, dragged someone into the courtyard. She needed both hands to clasp the ends of the whip wrapped around the naked woman's throat.

The distance over which she had dragged Andrea had served to bruise her bare body. Andrea could gasp for air after her mother took the whip from her, but she cried out anew when it came down across her body, ripping her flesh.

Andrea curled up into a ball as the strikes continued, again and again.

Gara scaled the wall and rushed to intervene. "Ma'am! Please, whatever she's done...."

Marian turned on Gara, eyes aflame with rage, and the smaller woman took a step back. Tanner stepped in, positioning himself between Gara and the woman with the whip.

Using his body to guide Gara, Tanner backed up until he was a safe distance away. Gara ran off, and Tanner only stood there, quite shaken by the situation. This wasn't how families behaved. This wasn't how a mother behaved, and for a split-second he was afraid because he was quite sure this wasn't how a sane person would behave.

Gara returned shortly after with a sheet but came to a full stop before Marian. They glared at each other as Gara circled her until she reached Andrea and covered her naked body from view.

There was only one problem now—getting Andrea away in one piece.

Tanner glanced at the sheet, then at Marian, and took a deep breath and walked over to Andrea. He picked her up with little effort. He hefted the injured woman until she was curled up in his arms and carried her out like a bride.

When Tanner glanced back to see Gara catching up, he felt confident enough to pick up speed as he hurried to Andrea's room. As soon as Tanner deposited Andrea into the bed, Gara rushed in and closed the door.

Andrea was Tanner's only focus as he crouched down and pulled the black sheets back to examine the damage. At the sight of Andrea's usually well-kept hair cut unevenly, he frowned. He knew how much Andrea took pride in her appearance, so he thought of the best course of action.

Something else took up his attention: Gara, who jumped around ripping off the posters.

"What are you doing?" Tanner asked, hurrying to stop her. "Her posters—"

"They're not hers! Those assholes were using them to torment her. They're not hers!"

The last poster was of the opera by the door, and Tanner stopped her from ripping it down.

"No. Leave this one."

Gara regarded him for the first time. "Your speaking has gotten better."

"Yes." Tanner admitted. "I'm healing just fine."

"What? How?"

"Don't worry about that. Let's get her dressed. She's bruised pretty badly."

"Can you heal her?"

Tanner hesitated. I'd—I'd feel better if Queen did it. I don't want to make it worse.

Gara took one look at Andrea, who lay curled up. "No. Please try. She doesn't need Queen's colorful commentary."

An hour later, Tanner was relieved to see Andrea's blue eyes open. Wrapped in a blanket, sitting with her feet propped up, Andrea wore a reluctant frown.

Tanner took pleasure in seeing it dawn on Andrea that her hair was being cut and styled. Maybe once she'd noticed that her skin was healed, she'd feel better. The emotion coming from her, however, made it clear to Tanner that Andrea couldn't bring herself to care about any of it.

Gara made a fast job of that and then picked up Andrea's feet and sat, positioning those same feet in her own lap.

"Nothing like a makeover on a rough morning, huh?" Gara asked, smiling.

Andrea's pale blue eyes stared through her.

"You've got your new hairstyle and everything." Gara forced a smile. "Now all we need is to pamper the rest of you." She produced a small pen and grinned. "How about a pedicure? What color do you like?"

Andrea still had no response; she kept on staring into space. The sound of boots dropping made the young noblewoman flinch, and she wore a look of shock when she turned to find Tanner sitting close by.

Tanner dragged his chair near, leaned back in his seat, put his own right foot in Gara's lap, and said, "Blue."

Sometime later, Andrea stared at her feet, her right toes red and her left toes blue. She glanced over at Tanner's long feet to a mirroring of the same colors.

They sat in a hushed silence for a while as Gara continued in her task, this time putting floral patterns on the colorful digits.

"You're such a sweetie, Andrea," Gara said, as if the situation hurt her, too. "And things will get better." At Andrea's snort and bitter laugh, Gara's frown deepened. "I mean it. Things will get better. I know you can't believe that right now and—"

"I don't want to talk about it." What is there to talk about? I don't need anyone taking pity on me or secretly thinking 'at least that's not me' when they see me. I don't want to be like Rene. I can't be like Rene.

Rene's not a bad person. And neither are you. Andrea wouldn't look at him, but Tanner persisted. You—

"Get outta my head. Now," Andrea growled.

Tanner sighed as he nodded. He sat back only to meet with Gara's disapproving frown.

"That's not really fair, Tan, using telepathy without her permission like that," Gara said. "She doesn't need anyone else treating her with disrespect."

It occurred to Tanner to argue that he had been given permission before, but instead he nodded and wiggled his toes.

"Sorry."

Tanner could tell that the look on Andrea's face broke Gara's heart every time she saw it. He appreciated that the smaller woman was desperate to try to take it away.

"We couldn't find any comfortable clothes for you, but you are the luckiest imppette alive." She nodded to Tanner, and grinned. "Tan's taller than you, but E's get issued clothes by the Colony. The fabric is very flexible, so it was a good fit for you."

Andrea looked down at herself for the first time. She wore Tanner's shirt and trousers. She hesitated but asked, "What about you? What will you wear?"

Tanner gave off a sheepish smile as he blushed.

"Oh. He took your stuff," Gara answered instead. "Figured I'd cut them into shorts so he doesn't go around looking like a fool for wearing pants that are too short. Hope you don't mind."

"Probably never fit in them again anyway," Andrea grumbled. "Be my guest."

Tanner bowed. "Thanks."

"Attention," the System's voice chimed in, steady and cold. "Authorized Colony official for transport in three, two, one."

Nothing happened, and they ignored the announcement until five minutes passed and the voice was there again.

"All workers and guests, report to the main courtyard for assessment."

They traded glances with each other. Tanner was the first to lower his feet, then Andrea, who stood. Tanner made a fast job of rolling up his pants legs. He then dropped to his knees and reached down to do the same with the pants Andrea was wearing. When they were at her ankle, he repeated the process and stood.

Even as they approached and saw the assembly of men in the courtyard, they weren't aware of the implications. The men had vividly colored hair, and Gara waved to a few.

"Are those E's?" Andrea asked.

"Yeah," Gara muttered. "Pretty powerful ones, ability-wise. That's a lot of firepower. What the hell?"

One man, short but well built, walked by carrying a large metal object.

Andrea gasped. "Is that our database?"

Kobal stood at the center of the courtyard, his hands behind his back as he called out, "Good morning."

Marian was the last to arrive, opting to keep to the hallway. When Kobal caught sight of her, he smiled. "This is a good ole-fashioned audit."

"An audit?" The woman made her way to him, fists clenched. "On whose authority?"

"On mine." A man fell from the ceiling and landed crouched down with a thud. "Good morning."

Tanner kept his eyes on Andrea, who watched the scene unfold. He imagined that the young woman might have never seen her mother shake. Marian, frightened, continued to step away as the man stood to his full height.

The stranger was blond, blue-eyed, and not pleased to be there. Marian's unease resonated with Andrea; the fear drifted off her so strongly that Tanner half expected everyone to run around looking for safety. He wasn't surprised; Met, the Colony's top guard, had that effect.

"Met." Marian's breath hitched. "We...we've never had the pleasure."

"No. Can't say we have," Met answered.

"Wh-what would prompt our garnering the attention of a high ELETE such as yourself?" she asked. "Surely we fall far under your very careful radar."

"You have recently put in a petition to have the title of your house revoked from your current head-in-waiting."

"That only requires a superficial scan."

"True." Met's pale blue eyes glanced to Kobal. "Mr. Kobal, as is his prerogative, changed his mind and decided to do a deep scan of your files. He spent all night yesterday being quite thorough with his inspections of your facilities, and it appears you have discrepancies."

"No." Marian exhaled and stood to her full height. "No. We've always been legit. We don't need the Colony on our backs. There are no grounds for this. None."

"Andrea." Met focused on Marian, and the name made her freeze. "It would appear that five years ago, one of your staff applied for and was denied a teaching license, but then magically, the next month, one was issued."

Marian gasped, eyes wide. "No. No one can fool the Assembly. There's no way she could have. That was five years ago, so she would have been fifteen. And no one, be it adult or child, can fool the Assembly. Especially not that moron."

"But you do see my problem, if someone can?" Met didn't get an answer, and he smiled. "And you're right; no child could. So that means it was probably a coordinated effort. Meaning that this place will be scanned, double scanned, and triple scanned, and once we've established that she did in fact act alone, then we will take her. If it turns out that your business has been forging Colony files, well...I don't have to spell it out for you. Young face or not, I don't think you will live long enough to reach the end of that jail sentence."

At her wide eyes and mute response, Met nodded in satisfaction.

"Take everything that's not bolted down," Met commanded. "And the stuff bolted down...take that, too. Let's go."

Gara still gaped in shock. "An audit." He looked to Andrea for help, but the noblewoman was gone. Tanner met Gara's gaze and darted for the hall.

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