I scrolled through the pirate site hosting the TBATE novel, reading the latest chapter fervently, over and over again. 

Is this canon? It can't be...

The corners of my eyes burned, and I felt my throat tighten; clogging up with a warm lump. 

...Tessia is...

I yelled out, throwing my cellphone into the wall. It bounced against the wall, shattering into three pieces. 

"Nico!" I screamed, standing and raving throughout my small apartment. "What the fuck is he going to do to my Tessia...!!"

I stomped a foot into the TV screen, cracking it. Finally, after decimating most of my home, I calmed. 

"Fuck..." I muttered, curling into bed, blankets over my head. "This is frustrating... I can't take it!" 

'Maybe I should just kill the author?' I thought, fighting the panic swelling and pounding against my chest. 'No, that won't work! The bastard already wrote the stupid chapter...'

I hugged my knees, wheezing. 'I have to do something... Write a fic? No, that's fucking stupid and time-consuming.'

I clasped my chest tightly, my heart pounding; churning chaotically. 

Struggling to breathe, I stumbled up, tumbling into the bathroom. I opened the medicine cabinet, gulping down my painkillers and high blood pressure medication. 

'Calm down, this isn't the first time this happened,' I thought, glaring at the mirror, damp hair sticking to my head. 'It happened with... with...? Fuck! I can't even remember the name of the novel...'

Why would I? Mediocre crap doesn't deserve to fill out space in the Temple of my Mind; the House of all Great Fiction. No! I only remember things deemed worthy.

I sighed, exhausted, crawling back into bed. The medicine tiring my body. 'Well...I doubt I'll forget...Tess...' 

I closed my heavy eyelids...

...Can't... accept...

I...

...Hate this.

It was dark. I tried to open my eyes, but couldn't remember how to do that... Besides, eyes? What even am I? Something simple; physical...limited. A... life? Biological lifeform, of sorts—definitely.

...No.

No! I was not that—maybe I was, is—but what I really am... is angry. Angry at...Tessia!

An ominous feeling tore through my state of being. Blasphemy! I wasn't angry at Tessia, I was angry—outraged—at how Tessia was being treated!! 

I must fix this now! I have to! 

A light too minuscule to be measured suddenly sparked into existence, then expanded infinitely—before collapsing in on itself, giving birth to a brilliant sphere of energy.

I recoiled, trying to comprehend what I just witnessed, but it made no sense. The concept of infinity, trickling out of my consciousness, becoming more and more contradictory and convoluted.

Slowly, surely, I finally remember what—or rather who I am.

Connor.

The dumbass who has to work his ass off to buy a new TV and phone...once he wakes up.

'...Dammit, what kind of dream was that?' I thought, prying open my eyes. 'Did I fall out of the goddamn Matrix?'

I look around, the surroundings completely pitch black, safe for... My gaze drifted down and stayed there for a long time.

A faint, but visible white glow permeating from my skin as mist-like wisps. I softly pinched my cheeks, making sure I wasn't dreaming still. It hurt. But not as much as the hellish ache burning up from my abdomen. 

I stood, a hand against my luminous gut. I peered out into the distance, somehow my vision adapting. The place was desolate. A dense cloud of dust shifted formlessly a few inches above the dead, gray earth. 

I frowned, smacking my dry tongue on the top of my mouth; tiny grains between my teeth. 

'...This doesn't feel like a dream,' I concluded, sucking on my teeth.

Then again, did any dream feel like a dream while it was being dreamt?

"...Confusing as hell...and stupid," I shook my head, walking forward. "...For now... let's just get somewhere."

The earth swallowed my feet, leaving deep footprints. I walked for what felt to be hours until I realized I wasn't making any progress. And, frankly, the pulsing pain from his solar plexus made for an uncomfortable walk. Additionally, the desolate scenery was depressing. 

'I want to wake up,' I thought, plopping to the ground; pushing up a cloud of the ashy sand. Was my subconscious mind trying to tell me something?

Doubtful. I have quite the mental fortitude. If something was wrong with me on a mental level... I'd know. 

"I was wondering what survived my World Eater technique..." a voice came, tender and trembling ever so slightly.

I turned to the owner of the voice. An aged man that held a self-important air, which contrasted with the gentle gaze he used to study me. Though, the strangest thing about the man was the extra radiant amethyst eye on his forehead. 

I stared back at him curiously...I should've guessed. My subconscious brought me here to vent a fraction of my anger.

"...You said, 'World Eater technique', correct?" I asked, standing. He stared, motionless. "And your intent for using this ghastly ability was to...kill Eralith Tessia?"

My mental effigy of Aldir showed a confused expression. This angered me; the heat in my stomach flaring and bursting forth, rippling space as it made its way to the physical realm.

'Now I understand,' I told myself, glaring at the asura through churning space. He moved back a few hundred paces, obviously guarded. 'The 'mana core' really just represents my anger...' I raised a hand to the man who thought killing Tess was an honorable act, then imagined the charred corpse of the Sinner.

Black lightning crackled around the tips of my fingers, before shooting toward Aldir instantaneously. The influx of energy didn't incinerate him, instead, the electrical current seeped into his body. 

Aldir's body convulsed violently. He looked down at his hands with a dread-laced expression as they melted. It wasn't long before his entire body liquified.

I sighed in annoyance. 'What's the point of this if it doesn't fight back? Or at least put up some resistance.'

My gaze soon softened when I noticed how the dense smog of my mana embraced the dead earth. 

"...Look at what that bastard did to Tessia's home," I mumbled, scooping a hand full of dirt. "I should spawn him back and kill him more painfully..."

I tried imagining Aldir's figure in front of me, willing him into existence. Nothing happened. My mana simply wreathed around erratically.

Since when was my mind so...unimaginative?

Looking down, I placed a palm against the dead earth. 'Let's try this, then,' I thought, using my mental image of Elshire as a schematic for the 'spell'. 

The earth rumbled as it greedily swallowed my mana; just as a newborn babe suckled on its mother's breast.

"Eat," I whispered, rubbing the small blade of grass budding beneath my finger. "I'll take care of you for as long as I'm here..."