Slowly, the red color of the Orc diminishes and vaporizes like fog into thin air, leaving a relatively normal, green corpse behind.

'Well then, time to penetrate it.'

'Come again?'

I turn to the still disgusted Jess. She's struggling to keep up her appearance, switching between the cold version and the one who just wants to turn away from this mess. It's actually a bit funny if you see her trying and failing over and over again.

"Hey, Jess." (Me)

"Huh?" (Me)

'Alright, here it comes. Getting stage fright.'

'Still not content with the "penetrating" part you just mentioned.'

I breathe in deeply in preparation to what's coming. My professionalism won't let me fuck this up.

I look her deep in the eyes, which she still tries to avert vehemently. Raising my completely crushed hands, which alone could already be described as 18+ content, I hold them in front of her face, which she doesn't seem to appreciate.

"Can you lend me a hand for a second?" (Me)

'No, you fucking didn't.'

"I... fuckin' wot?" (Jess)

"Thank you, I'll be here all day!" (Me)

She looks at me with judgment in her eyes, but soon a little smile appears on her face.

The smile evolves into a wide grin, and soon she starts laughing full on. It's always nice to have your jokes acknowledged.

"HAHAHAHAHA!" (Jess)

It's probably because of the sheer ridiculousness she's in right now that she's holding her belly in laughter. Situations like these can mess up your mind in several ways, with this being one of the more tame ones.

"How can you make such a bad joke right now?! People are dying!" (Jess)

"That joke was fucking golden, excuse you." (Me)

Even with all the shit that's going on around her, she still doesn't stop laughing. As if she wouldn't even mind the corpses lying around.

'Well, I actually do need her help, but I guess it can wait in this Orc infested dungeon.'

I open the shop in my status while listening to her grunt like a little piggy in between her laughs.

Congratulations! Due to achieving some outstanding things, you acquired (a) skill(s)! Achievements: Being the first one to kill a dungeon boss in your world (GREAT ACHIEVEMENT); First one to kill an Orc Chieftain; Survive a fight with less than 5% HP; Kill a boss barehanded Your reward will be calculated from these achievements! - Congratulations! You acquired the skill "Regeneration" (Lvl 1) (Active) Regeneration (Lvl 1): Heal all your wounds in a specific amount of time! If more damage is done, the regeneration will not heal you completely! (Time needed and cooldown is shortened as level increases) (Time currently needed: 25 hours) (Cooldown: 2 hours) - Congratulations! You acquired the skill "Orcs Strength" (Lvl 1) (Active) Orcs Strength (Lvl 1): Temporarily boosts your strength by 15%! (Percentage will increase with level)

 

You unlocked the "Unarmed mastery" Skill!

'Well, I guess fuck my choice of a class. Seems like I'll go full bulldozer...'

'What do you expect after bashing the head of a bodybuilder into a fucking pulp? A fireball spell or something?'

'Wow, look out for Ms. Grumpypants.'

'I don't know about you, but getting your body stolen doesn't really scratch my itch.'

'And that's what I like about meeting new people. We have different opinions. We learn from each other.'

'...'

'Some opinions are obviously wrong but don't get hung up on that.'

'I knew it.'

I immediately activate the "Regeneration" skill to start healing my overall wounded body. Creepingly, as if seeping out of a clogged faucet, droplets of energy enter my bloodstream. It's not enough to mend my broken bones in a heartbreak, but a certain warmth engulfs me.

Although I've had similar experiences before, to say the least, it's still nice to feel some power coming back into my sluggish body. Even after the stat boost, my body gets tired after fighting a methed up Arnold Schwarzenegger.

After checking in on the laughing hyena beside me, and waiting for her to calm the fuck down, I finish my request from before.

"Now that you're done laughing, can you do me a little favor?" (Me)

"*Snort* What is it?" (Jess)

She still has a smile on her face. Her tension from the beginning seems to be gone at least a bit.

"Would you mind ripping that guys ribcage open?" (Me)

'I swear to Satan, I never saw a smile vanish so quickly.'

"No, I won't do that." (Jess)

I made her laugh so much just a minute ago, and now she's being unreasonable again.

"Oh come on, I've got my hands full right now." (Me)

'STAHP!'

Her eyes dart between the corpse and my hands.

"Why?" (Jess)

"Cause I want to get my hands on his heart." (Me)

'FUCKING HELL! STAAAHP!'

'Alright, I'll keep my hands off the hand jokes from now on.'

'The worst thing is that I can't kill myself.'

'That's what you get for being a cheeky cunt.'

"Why do you need his heart?" (Jess)

She asks this question with a multitude of emotions on her face. Mostly disgust and curiosity. I do commend her, however, for showing the least bit of curiosity right now. And who am I to deprive someone of their education?

"Come on then, sit around the campfire! Ol' Nith here will teach ya something about life!" (Me)

I usher her closer to the imaginary campfire in front of me, though she doesn't quite get it at first. Nontheless, after gesturing her closer to the warm fireplace, she's ready to learn.

"So, you saw that monster deflating like my hopes and dreams, right?" (Me)

"...what is that analogy?" (Jess)

"Please don't ask." (Me)

My salty tears start to well up, I stifle a sniffle in sad nostalgia.

"Surprise, surprise! Monsters have mana and skills as well! And do you know what happens when they die?" (Me)

"..." (Jess)

She falls into thought for a brief second while I wait patiently. I would never think of interrupting someone right in their train of thought.

"Maybe-" (Jess)

"Don't interrupt me." (Me)

I do it after.

"Well, in some cases, the mana and life essence of the monster condenses upon its death and manifests in its heart. A sweet ol' bead, called "mana stone"." (Me)

"And those are for making armor and weapons I assume?" (Jess)

"Don't just assume things." (Me)

"..." (Jess)

"...but you're right." (Me)

"I've read my fair share of lightnovels." (Jess)

'Oooohhh, a fellow weeb.'

"Generally, the most basic use of them is imbuing gear with magical properties. And since I want to do exactly that, I need you to play "Operation" on our little buddy over here." (Me)

She glances over the room a few times, uncomfortable with the idea of what comes next. Even if she doesn't want to, she realizes that gear is something vital in an apocalypse.

Reluctantly, she points her hand toward a snapped metal rod near us. The sharp tip probably came from being snapped in two while falling.

The make-shift scalpel floats over the Orc's corpse, glinting with sharp intent. She closes her eyes, not able to bear what she has to do next.

"Or we could just take the corpse with us and wait for my hands to heal so I can do it myself." (Me)

The already flying rod halts mid-air.

"You're an asshole." (Jess)

"Born and raised, baby." (Me)

After struggling to get the Orcs dead body somehow on my shoulders and even needing to activate his given skill to carry him comfortably, I look at Jess.

The tips of her hair have already begun shimmering, showing how compatible she is with her received power. If it weren't for her disheveled looks and the fucky place we're in, I could explain what's happening to her right now. But nah.

"Wanna get out of this shithole?" (Me)

"No, I want to stay here my whole life." (Jess)

"We'd need a bed for that and we'd also have to-" (Me)

"That was a joke." (Jess)

"A terrible one. Come on." (Me)

I turn around and search in Tricks memories for the location of the exit. Although I'm giving it my best, her memories only come out hazily, as if I'm looking at them through a pinhole.

Behind me, I only hear quiet muttering.

"I don't think it was THAT bad..." (Jess)

'To be honest. it wasn't. But I need to discipline her and not let her be a cunt like the other girl I know.'

'I can hear your thoughts. We're both in one head.'

'Trust me, I know that.'

We descend the stairs together, while watching out for any monsters in our way. With every step I make, the sirens from outside get louder.

It doesn't even take 5 minutes to get to the exit, even though this school seems to be unrealistically huge. The merging probably tinkered with this place, changing its scale.

Thankfully, the total layout wasn't changed and we find the exit in a hurry. I open the wooden double doors and breathe fresh air in peace, for the first time in a few thousand years.

'Shit, the Orc on my shoulders stinks.'

I inspect my surroundings.

"Jess?" (Me)

She looks at the sight before us in awe.

"Yes?" (Jess)

"In what city are we supposed to be again?" (Me)

She hesitates a bit before answering.

"We should be in London, England." (Jess)

The regularly blue sky is tainted crimson. Bird-like creatures are flying through it. In the distance, a pillar of, what looks like, flesh towers a few kilometers in the sky. Even new mountain ranges have been added.

I admit that I haven't been in London for a bit, but I can tell that it definitely didn't look like this. A city that was once one of the world's hotspots is now ruled by carnage.

Screams echo in the distance, sirens blurt but quickly disappear again.

"You know what? I think you can scratch the "London" part. And I'm also pretty sure that England doesn't really work anymore either." (Me)

She just stands there, baffled at the sight in front of us.

"Wait here one second." (Me)

I leave her standing in front of the school gate for a minute and break into a car fom the parking lot. She might have some things to think about, but we don't have the time for that right now.

I start the engine and drive the car right in front of her feet.

"M'lady." (Me)

She snaps out of it since the car blocks her vision and looks at the top of the car.

"This would be way cooler if there wasn't a dead Orc bound on top." (Jess)

"I need the corpse. Take it or leave it." (Me)

She opens the door and takes the seat next to me in a sullen daze. I drive the old Jeep off the school grounds, the engine rattling unnaturally. This is most likely the last we'll see of this building.

I turn into the next corner and just drive off, haphazardly.

"I would turn on the radio, but... ya know." (Me)

The engine growls in our ears and I notice how my hands have already started to heal due to the regeneration skill. It seems like it prioritizes heavily damaged areas, as I can feel bones slowly popping into place.

"So? Who are you?" (Jess)

"Nith's my name, speed is my game." (Me)

I drive with over 60 km/h in a 30 zone, so I earned that. I don't think I have to look out for children in an apocalypse.

"I already know your name. But... you're kind of weird. I mean, you managed to kill such a huge monster so collected. You know about a bead in the monsters organs, even though there was no such information from God. You're not even batting an eye, even though your hands are completely destroyed. And most of all, you're wearing a skirt, even though you're a guy." (Jess)

"FUCK! I FORGOT THE PANTS!" (Me)

*THUMP!*

We drive something over, which wasn't a child... I think.

You have killed a Lavia (Lvl 2)! +11 EXP! +1 SP!

'Didn't commit a late abortion on your first day. Congrats.'

She stares at me intently. Her suspicions are justifiable and she picked up on quite a few things, considering that her hometown is drowning in flames right now.

"I'm just a small town girl, livin' in a lonely wooorld~" (Me)

Her attempt to hit my arm is beautifully dodged by yours truly. I won't let myself get hit by such an amateur.

'10/10. Magnificient form.'

"I'm serious." (Jess)

"*Sigh* " (Me)

I weigh out the options in my head. I do need a place to rest, although I could just take an empty house which there should be plenty of. But I just got out of hell after being deprived of social interaction for longer than anyone could imagine.

I'm not gonna go and spend some more me time here. I need an audience for all the shit I do, or else I get bored easily.

'So I don't count?'

'You know that's not what I wanted to say, dear!'

'IT'S OVER BETWEEN US!'

'NOOOOOOO!'

"Isn't it common courtesy to be the first one to introduce yourself, before asking the other to?" (Me)

Another hurdle on the road. I ignore the message.

She continues to stare at me.

"That's why I hate this generation. They just have no manners." (Me)

Another hurdle.

"I'm just a dude who chilled in hell for a few years and now came to this world after having merged with the previous owner of this body. Since the previous owner was a girl, I'm wearing a skirt." (Me)

"WHAT?!" (Jess)

"The previous owner was a girl, and that's why-" (Me)

"NOT THAT PART! THE PART ABOUT HELL!" (Jess)

'She should really learn how to be clearer with her words.'

She holds onto the hand-grip at the roof of the car in panic. It stings a little to be target of such prejudice. Yes, I was in hell, but I'm not such a bad guy, ya know?

'Give me my body back, then.'

'Finders keepers.'

"Oh that? Well, some things happened here and there and I ended up in hell." (Me)

My grip on the steering wheel tightens at the thought of that damn reason.

"SOME THINGS?! WHAT DID YOU DO THAT YOU ENDED UP IN HELL?!" (Jess)

I disregard my wounded hands and grip the steering wheel even tighter.

"I didn't do anything wrong. It was me, who wanted to make everything right." (Me)

I remember the unrightful things that were done to me. Hate wells up. Memories flash through my head like napalm flames.

Her panicked reaction settles slowly, her eyes glued on me and my body language. It seems like she got the clue after I made it painfully obvious.

Another hurdle.

"But hey, at least I've got a sweet life ahead of me now. I mean, being able to just drive around in this free world is pretty nice." (Me)

'Yeah, if you ignore the corpses all around and the screams for help.'

"Oh, since we're at the topic of merging, your merging isn't finished yet either." (Me)

"My what isn't what?" (Jess)

I point at the tips of her hair. The part that was only shining a few minutes ago, is slowly turning a metallic silver, creeping its way up.

Merging people usually takes a few days at least, coming with several side-effects, including pain and change in emotion.

'Why did we merge so quickly then?'

'Good question!'

'Thanks!'

I was lying.

'Cunt!'

In the whole process, there are several things to consider. Emotional and physical compatibility, mana signature, what power rules in the soul supreme etc. The more compatible your souls are, the smoother the process will be.

'But our's was involved with an extreme amount of pain. If it wasn't for my ability to deal with it like a champ, things could've gone a bit~ tense.'

Even considering everything that's involved, somehow I still merged with this body although it rejected me.

'Good choice.'

'Not really a dealbreaker for me tho. Rather a bonebreaker.'

'...'

'My bones were-'

'I know.'

"This actually doesn't look so bad." (Jess)

I set aside the unappreciative voice in my head aside -

'Joke was kaka.'

-and turn my attention back to the girl with fresh tips.

"I need to admit, it's kinda hot." (Me)

She plays with the tips of her hair for a few seconds, silence rules over the car while she's at it. To be honest, kinda disappointed not to see a reaction after my eloquent compliment.

"Well, I don't really know what happened to you, but you didn't rape me on sight, so I don't think that you are such a bad person that you belonged to hell." (Jess)

"I know right? I'm a gentleman." (Me)

We drive over another small monster.

"And I'm sure I'll at some point know mor- where are we driving? " (Jess)

I step on the gas.

"Good question. To be honest, I was just drifting around while "Deja Vu" was playing in my head. Enjoying the little things." (Me)

"Well, actually, my house is quite near, so we could go there if you don't have anything against it?" (Jess)

Even though she's inviting a guy into her house, there's not a single shred of shyness around her. With the whole world going through shit, it's only natural to want to go home, but I still only met her today.

"I'm getting to third base already? Still got it in me." (Me)

And now she's blushing a little bit.

'I love it when a beauty blushes.'

'What a horndog you are, young lady.'

'You do remember that I became this way because of you, right?'

"Alright, where do you live?" (Me)

I refuse to gratify such a comment with a response. She explains the way to her house, which doesn't seem to be very far away. According to her instructions, and my knowledge of the nearby region, it should only take a few minutes to drive.

I follow her directions, and soon we arrive at-

"Damn, you're rich." (Me)

'That's a castle, not a house. Holy shit.'

"Eh, it's alright." (Jess)

She shrugs at the compliment, clearly still bragging about it like the little shit she is.

"By the way, I might get very emotional in the act. I might cry." (Me)

"Not gonna touch you or let you touch me." (Jess)

"Bummer." (Me)

And like this, I found my first base and the house I'd live in for a while.