The flap swept aside again, and more boot-stomping thundered across the floor as Yanek rushed in.

“What the hell is... woah!”

Yanek stopped short as he took in the sight of Sevei lying on the bed and registered the state of him. Then he began to cackle with glee as Sevei's face turned various shades of red.

“Sir, you have got the Imperial tent pitched there,” Yanek hooted. “What the hell did he do to you?”

“He healed me,” Sevei answered through clenched teeth.

“And it did that?”

“It's not funny,” Sevei said pitifully. “It hurts. Stop laughing and get me a quilt or something. I can't move.”

“I don't know that a quilt will help matters,” Yanek noted, but he obediently fetched one from a cabinet of clean bedding and brought it to him. “Here, pull this over,” he said, trying to hand a corner of the quilt to Sevei.

“I can't move,” Sevei said again. His fingers twitched, then fell still. “I can't move anything.”

“So... you probably can't do anything about that then, huh?” Yanek began to snort with laughter again.

“Yan...”

“Sorry... Ah! I've been healed by Alchemists before, but nothing like that happened.”

“Well, whoever healed you probably wasn't a SADISTIC ASSHOLE!!!” Sevei shouted, eyeing the tent doorway with a malevolent glare.

Yanek shook the quilt out over him, then pulled it up to his shoulders. Sitting on the bed next to Sevei he tucked the quilt around him as if he were putting a child to bed., then leaned over him with a hand on either side.

“Vei,” he said solemnly. “I'm only going to say this right now... because you're paralyzed and can't hit me for it.”

Sevei's eyes narrowed warily. A sly smile played over Yanek's lips.

“If you want him, just go for it.”

Sevei's face froze, his chest filling with cold as a fleeting fearful expression slid across his face before he averted his gaze nervously.

“What...” he muttered, his lips trembling slightly, “what nonsense are you spouting now?”

“Vei,” Yanek said firmly, his previous mirth exchanged for earnest gravity. “How long have we known each other? We have trained together, fought together, eaten together, bathed together... you think I didn't figure this out about you a long time ago?”

The cold wrapped itself around every part of Sevei's body. If he hadn't already been immobilized, he certainly would be from this abject terror. He flicked a glance at Yanek's face, unable to meet his eyes.

Yanek squeezed his shoulders.

“You are my General,” he said. “The best I've ever served under, by the way. And besides that, you're my heart-brother. If you think that would change anything, then maybe this friendship has been one-sided all along-”

“No,” Sevei said, his voice rough from the knot gathering in his throat. “No, Yan...” His eyes had turned glassy, and he turned his face away to hide his pained expression.

“Hey!” Yan said, his tone alight with renewed humor, “are... are you crying?!”

Sevei blinked his eyes dry and tried to clear his throat. “What... of course not...” he said petulantly. “And why mention bathing? I never looked at you...”

“Of course you did. I'm gorgeous.”

“I didn't...!”

“No,” Yanek conceded. “You've always been meticulously careful not to look. That's what gives you away.”

Sevei stared at the wall, mulling this over. “Huh.”

He finally turned to face Yanek, who looked down at him with a warm smile.

“And I'm serious,” Yanek said, shaking him gently. “If he's the one, go get him. Not this minute, obviously, but when you're up again, just go... grab him and have your way with him. What are you waiting for?”

“I already did,” Sevei said, instantly regretting that he'd let that slip.

“You tried?” Yanek cajoled. “Wait... you succeeded? ...what!? ...how? ...when!?”

Sevei rolled his eyes and bit his lip. “In Tharlburg... the night before we came over.”

“That was him?!” Yanek was positively giddy with this revelation.

“I didn't know who he was. If I had, I never would have...”

“Oh, yes you would. It may not be my thing, but I've got eyes. If he's got a sister who looks like that... well, she'd be a fancy noblewoman who wouldn't look at me twice, but you get my meaning.”

Sevei tried very hard not to smile at that, mostly failing, but the smile faded quickly.

“He's not interested in continuing,” he said quietly.

“Zarayan Sevei, you are far too old to be that naive,” Yanek admonished. “Look at the state you're in. This is not normal Alchemist bullshit. This is that man wants you bullshit. Even for a prank, this is awfully... intimate.”

“He's my colleague.”

“Screw that! Where else are people like us supposed to ever meet anyone? If I stay in the army much longer, I'll have to try for one of those Sekkha ladies, and she'll probably want to hog-tie me and whip me and stick things... wait. On second thought, that could be rather interesting...”

“Great,” Sevei sighed. “Now I have to ask that Alchemist if he can burn that image out of my brain. And that's another thing – he's an Alchemist. And a noble. You know how I feel about them.”

“You think it's possible they're not all that bad?” Yanek asked. “I'm thinking he might be an exception.”

Sevei fought another involuntary smile. “Yeah...” he murmured. “He is... exceptional.”

“There you go,” Yanek grinned.

“So why would he want me?” Sevei muttered sadly. “And we're fighting a war here. That is so much more important-”

“Hey! He'll want you because you're a catch. You're a damn good friend, and a damn good soldier, and as for the war, all our jobs will be a damn sight easier if you two drop this hostility and get on friendlier terms. How friendly is up to you.”

A ghost of memory whispered into Sevei's ear, Who has time to think about that right now? He stifled a groan as his pelvis contracted, sending him squirming beneath the quilt again.

Yanek stood and straightened the quilt around Sevei. “Did he say how long you'd be like this?”

Sevei shook his head. “He told me to rest for two hours.”

“Shhh... two hours? Well, I'd help you out, but I don't think we need to be that close,” Yanek laughed.

“No.”

“And you know I'm strictly for the ladies.”

“Yes.”

“They're just so soft and squishy.” Yanek raised his hands to chest height and crooked his fingers in obscene clutching motions.

“Yes.”

“That is probably not squishy at all right now.”

“Yan,” Sevei said calmly, his voice revealing his exhaustion, “will you please fuck off?”

“Right away, General!”

“Oh, now you remember that I'm your General?”

Making his way to the door, Yanek cocked both forefingers in his direction with a cheeky grin.

“The best I've ever served under. Don't forget I said that part when you can move again.”