Chapter 27

Why

Taking long strides, William locked himself in the bathroom. Slumping against the door he let his emotions wash over him, his legs felt weak and he slid down to the cold tiles. Tears running silently down his cheeks, he banged the back of his head against the door.

‘Why oh why did I have to fall in love with a straight man?’ He thought miserably.

Pulling his long legs up he cried himself out.

Some minutes later, coming back to his senses he felt like an idiot, then acted like an even bigger one, ‘what am I, a kid? No I’m a fully grown man, I will over come this.’

His new found confidence lasted about a minute, until he was stood in the shower with yet another boner.

William looked down at his unruly lower half and thought, ‘this is ridiculous, get a grip of yourself.’

But he couldn’t get a grip of himself mentally, as images of Mathew filled his mind.

Still not able to help himself mentally, William took a grip of himself physically again, thinking of the softly spoke, “it’s OK my love.” And the feel of Mathew’s body as he carried him across the bar.

As he released against the tiles, his heart and self respect plummeted. He couldn’t keep doing this, Mathew was the man he had deep feelings for, not an object of lust.

Once clean and dry and wrapped in a towel, with a jolt William realised that he didn’t bring any fresh clothes in with him.

Thinking he would rather not wear his stinking suit again, he quietly opened the door and stuck his head out, he couldn’t see Mathew and decided to risk it.

Getting to the closet, he flinched hearing the cupboard door creak. While putting on a long sleeved navy T-shirt William thought he heard a noise, but looking round he saw nothing.

Grabbing some underwear and trousers he retreated back into the bathroom.

Fully dressed he emerged back into his room and instantly knew he had been seen.

Mathew was sat on his bed, the look in his eyes was unmistakable, the look of shock and pity, but there was something else in Mathew’s gaze that he didn’t usually see.

William froze, he wanted to run back in to the bathroom and never come out again, “how much did you see?”

Taking a step towards him, Mathew said, “not enough.”

This was not the usual answer and William didn’t know what to say.

Taking another step forwards Mathew said, “I saw a little of your back, can I see the rest?”

William unconsciously took a step back, coming up against the bathroom door, “you want to see my body?”

His voice soft Mathew replied, “if you’ll let me.”

“But why?”

“I saw you one night while you were asleep on the sofa, the light was dim but I don’t think you look as bad as you think.”

“You say that but the look on your face says otherwise.”

Mathew stepped forwards again, now only three paces away, the look on his face changed to one that William didn’t understand, to add to his confusion Mathew licked his lips nervously and said, “I’m sorry William but I lied to you the other day.”

Completely bewildered at the change of topic, William stood rigidly against the door, “how?”

Taking two steps forwards, so he was right in front of the strong man, Mathew said tentatively, “William I am gay.”

William’s heart thundered in his ears and even while confused and slightly scared, a smile blossomed across his face, “really?”

On shaking legs Mathew took the last step forwards and placed a gentle hand on William’s chest, “yes, are you alright with that?”

Nodding dumbly, William covered Mathew’s hand with his own and smiled shyly down at the cute man’s bright green eyes.

“I take if from that smile, I’ve not misread the signs, you are interested in me too.”

Unable to catch his breath, William nodded again, “I really like you. Please can I kiss you?”

Putting his free hand on the back of William’s head, Mathew pulled him gently down till their lips were almost touching, his breath tickled William’s lips as he said, “are you sure this is what you want?”

In answer, William softly put his lips to Mathew’s, kissing him tenderly.

It was only a light kiss but to his embarrassment and shock, William’s body reacted again.

Pulling back from their kiss, he put his free hand on his crotch, going bright red, “I’m sorry, I don’t know what is wrong with my body.” He said, shame evident in his voice.

Pulling the hand from William’s crotch, Mathew moved his body forwards, pushing the bulge with his upper abdomen.

William moaned softly, it had been so long since anyone had touched his body, and no one had ever touched him like this.

Taking the hand from William’s chest, Mathew pulled the unresisting strong man over to the bed.

Taking off his suit jacket and tie, Mathew laid down pulling William after him.

Going on all fours, William held himself above the beautiful flushed man and slowly dropped on to his elbows, slowly bringing their bodies in to contact.

The feeling of Mathew underneath him made William’s mind fuzzy, in a sad whisper he said, “I’m not sure if I can do this.”

Pulling back from the big man above him, confusion, disappointment and a tiny bit of fear shot across Mathew’s face.

William hurriedly explained, “I really want to, but I don’t know what I’m doing and I’m already losing my senses, your too much for me to handle.”

Relaxing back onto the bed with a relieved sigh, Mathew reached up and encircled William’s neck with his arms, pulling him down on top of him.

“Let me guide you.”

Relaxing into Mathew’s embrace, William said shyly, “please be gentle with me.”

Mathew’s eyes went fierce and he kissed William passionately, sliding his hot tongue into William’s unsuspecting mouth, caressing his tongue and pulling their bodies closer together.

Wrapping his legs around William’s waist, Mathew rubbed his bum against his crotch.

His eyes going wide then closing, William moaned into Mathew’s mouth, and wondered what would of happened if he had asked Mathew to be rough with him.

Moving his tongue as best he could, William slowly moved his hips, pushing his bulging trousers against Mathew’s rump and felt the smaller man’s shaft swell against his abs.

Pulling back from their kiss, William asked in a breathless whisper, “are we really doing this?”

Licking the saliva from his lips, Mathew looked hungrily up at him, “I want to.” Rocking his hips, making the big man moan he said, “and there is no denying you want to.”

His eyes clouding with sadness, William asked, “what if my body puts you off?”

“Then you stay fully dressed.” Dropping a hand down, Mathew squeezed William’s man hood through his trousers and said, “this is the only bit I need. I just hope my body doesn’t put you off.”

“Why would it?”

Blushing shyly Mathew said tentatively, “because I’m a man, and all my intuition is telling me your not gay.”

Laughing in relief, William carefully undid Mathew’s shirt and slid his hands inside, while saying, “You don’t have to worry about that. I don’t know if I’m gay but I find you incredibly arousing.”