The world sometimes felt like a small place.

Behind me was a wall, in front of me was a woman, beyond her was a pile of unconscious men. Not a small pile, not weak men. Above my one shoulder was her arm, her face leaning close to me, leaning down, taller than me. Close, but in no danger of touching.

“How will you repay me?” she asked, her voice pretty deep and a little hoarse, husky.

Mistress Bishou, leader of the Virgin Flower cult. Bishou wasn’t her birth name. It meant dagger (according to the story, I never checked) and was from her initiation into a gang of street kids before cultivators found her. The story didn’t say why she was given that name, but she kept a dagger in her bedside table’s drawer, stained with very old blood, coated in resin to keep it from flaking off.

She was also someone Gou Dan eventually slept with to free his brother. Apparently, the truth was best told in the bed.

And she was gorgeous. Not like Fairy Liang, but gorgeous in the tomboy kinda way. Her arms slightly bulged with muscle even when she didn’t tense them, she wore trousers torn into shorts and a shirt with the bottom half torn off, showing off even more of her muscles, her abs especially hot. Her hair was cut short at the sides, not quite shaved, but maybe she did and let it grow out. On the top, it was longer, but still short for a woman and tied into a loose ponytail that flopped down on one side.

She wasn’t pale or scarred. A thick tan, a bit of dirt, streaks where she’d wiped something off, a spot of dried blood like a beauty mole by her nose. But her eyes were bright, vivid. A bit manic. She kept them opened wide when things were normal, squinting when fighting. And the iris, it was a dusty green. The story called it jade-like. I’d never seen jades before and thought they were like emeralds, but now I finally saw them, a little pale, but they looked like they were lit from inside, practically glowing.

“How about I repay you with my body?” I whispered, staring back at her through my eyelashes, a little smile.

She wasn’t my first since Fairy Liang, wouldn’t be my last.

After staring at me for a few seconds, maybe seeing if I’d break, she finally laughed. It wasn’t the beautiful and elegant laugh I liked. No, hers was a throaty chuckle. Her other hand came up, hooking my chin with a finger. I let her lead me, let her lean in close, never flinching.

Our lips met.

It was good, but wasn’t the same. Never was.

I let her lead me to a room upstairs, let her lock the door, let her take off my outer robe, let her take off my inner robe, let her pull down my bra, let her slide her leg between mine and grind against my vulva. She kissed me and touched me.

It was good, but wasn’t the same. Never was.

She pushed me down on the bed, kissing me hard, her tongue in my mouth like it owned the place. She liked my boobs, rubbing them, then squishing and squeezing, then lightly scraping my nipple with her nail.

She was good, the feeling intense, and she knew the right rhythm, not too quick and overwhelming me, not too slow and letting the feelings fade. Her leg still grinded between mine, never knowing when she’d brush against my clit, always a surprise that made my breath catch.

I was getting hot, really hot.

But it was nothing like with Fairy Liang.

“Purr for me, my kitten,” she whispered, then bit my ear, sharp. The pain made me gasp, then she softly blew, intensely feeling it since she left my ear wet, and it covered up the pain, made me think I liked it.

But it was nothing like with Fairy Liang.

She was good, worked me like she knew exactly what she was doing. I let her.

Then I didn’t let her.

I bit her lip, surprised her. She pulled away and I said, “You like it rough?” Her mouth quickly quirked into a grin, narrowed eyes opening wide again.

I dug my fingers into her back, pressing the short nails against her skin, and bounced my leg, pressing against her vulva, not too hard, but hard enough. Her face still close, I leaned up and sucked on her lip, sucked hard.

Of course, she didn’t take my actions lying down. Well, she did, but I mean she wanted to keep “topping” me. She wanted to be in control. She wanted to fuck me. And she was stronger than me, no way I could flip her over and press her down.

But did she think she was stronger than Fairy Liang? Did she think she could fuck me senseless like Fairy Liang did?

It didn’t matter how much she fucked me, how little I fucked her, I wouldn’t cum first. It was good, but wasn’t the same. Never was.

“Listen how wet you are,” I said. Every time my leg bounced, she squelched, her juices oozing out. “And I’m not even using my hands or tongue.”

She hated it, hated me for saying it, but she didn’t dare deny it. She loved it too much to deny it. “Little brat,” she said, growled, fighting off a moan.

“Mm, Mistress likes me being bratty,” I said.

Her eyes narrowed—she liked being called Mistress.

“Mistress can’t even punish me properly. Wasn’t I supposed to purr? Why does it sound like Mistress is purring instead?” I said, smirking.

She leaned in to kiss me, to shut me up.

I won.

She kept trying, but her strength wasn’t in it any more, and it wasn’t long before she just lay on top of me, shuddering, her moans loud in my ear. I sort of wiggled my leg, working her through her orgasm, gently stroking her back.

“Good Mistress, cum for me.”

Eventually, her shudders stopped, her breaths settled. If I wasn’t a cultivator, her body would have squashed me, like she was boneless how she just lay there, heavy with her muscles.

With her done, I slid my hand down and got myself off. She wasn’t a bad fuck toy. One of my best, really. Maybe she’d beat me after a few more goes.

But once was enough to know.

I knew it was stupid, that even I just thought of Fairy Liang as a fuck buddy at first. But if she couldn’t make me stop thinking of Fairy Liang, then what was the point?

“You’re good,” Bishou softly said. Probably not an easy compliment to get out of her.

“I know.”

—

Lying in bed, I looked at my apprentice’s sleeping face. Not, like, my actual apprentice. That was common here, but I still felt icky about the, what was it, abuse of power? That’s what my old world called it, right?

So yeah, she wasn’t my actual apprentice. Her name was Li. It meant pretty, and she was. Twenty years old, but she was the cute type with a baby face, really slim, and small boobs.

Why I say she was my apprentice, she visited me last night. I didn’t really know her personally, but I went back to the sect around when she joined, so I saw her around the last, what, ten years? A decent cultivator, energetic, also helpful and kind. So when she turned up, I sorta knew her.

I asked her what she wanted, she asked me how I looked so beautiful. I didn’t lie, told her I masturbate in the moonlight a lot, but kept the bit about cultivating yin energy to myself. Gotta keep some beauty secrets.

And she asked, “Could you show me?”

I won’t say asking another woman to masturbate in front of you is gay, but she also put her hand on my thigh and pouted, fluttering her eyelashes.

It never really hit me how hard it was for Fairy Liang to actually sleep with me until that moment. I felt like there were so many reasons to say no. She was twenty, I was over sixty. It felt wrong. But… that was my old world, you know? Like, age gaps are bad coz of power. Money, or being a boss, or naive.

Here, cultivating sorta means you have to be a good person. You can still be greedy and lusty and stuff, but it can’t go too far, otherwise you can’t break through to the next level. So age gaps aren’t, like, bad by default, if that makes sense. If anything, it’s usually the younger ones taking advantage to get help from the older ones.

Like how Fairy Liang helped me get rid of my wood root and boosted up my fire and metal cultivation.

I don’t think that’s why Li visited me, though. I was just a well-known slut for pretty women. And considering I was lying in bed, looking at her sleeping face, it’s pretty obvious my reputation was well-earned.

It was my first time with someone who was actually younger than me. You know, actual decades younger. I liked it. It reminded me of my goal when I first “woke up” in this world, wanting a bunch of “little sisters” who worshipped me.

That was what she did: worshipped me. She kissed me from my toes to the tips of my hair. She ate me out until her tongue was too tired to move, then fingered me until both of her hands cramped up. She said such nice things about every bit of my body. And when I pushed her down, she melted into the sweetest puddle, her watery eyes as she came, her legs wrapping around me, clenching on my fingers like she’d never let go….

If she was my first, I probably would’ve fallen in love with her too. Kept my goal of having a harem of other women just like her.

But she wasn’t my first.

Like always, everything reminded me of Fairy Liang. Every moment, I wished it was her. The whole time, I thought about how it was like the first time I slept with her, saw what it was like from her position—her role. I understood why she thought I loved her. I finally understood why she thought she loved me.

It was funny. After the first few women, I knew I was only hurting myself. Knew no one could make me forget about her from just one fuck. But it was, like, an addiction. Chasing her high. Searching for those moments where I’d remember her. Because, well, we’d fucked a lot, so it was easy to find things that made me remember. A moment where someone touched me or moaned or squeezed around my fingers or trembled in just the right way. Maybe an expression, a word. Anything to bring me back to those magical nights.

I wanted to make sure what I felt with her was real love, and the evil genie granted my wish, leaving this gaping hole in my heart. Half a year together and I was like this fifty years later. What would I look like after another fifty?

So, so pathetic.

—

After nearly a century, I finally left isolation, my body feeling lighter, yet stronger, than ever. My mind held a profound clarity, heart a profound peace. I had gained a glimpse of enlightenment and saw both myself and the world in a new and profound way.

However, who I did not see was my precious Xiaoxiao.

“Ah, Elder Liang, you are out of isolation?”

I smiled at my disciple. “Indeed, I have successfully broken through.”

“Incredible! We knew you would,” he said.

The other disciple happily clapped, grinning as she said, “We will inform the other elders—”

“Please let them know I shall rest for today and greet them in the morning,” I said.

“Of course, Mistress,” both said, bowing deeply while making a gesture of respect.

With my hint being hardly subtle, they said no more. I passed them and took a leisurely walk back to my residence. Of course, I could have flown, but I had spent a long time not moving my body and the exercise felt good.

For nearly a century, I hadn’t thought of Xiaoxiao once. That had been the cost of my breakthrough. What had eluded me before was the transience of the world, a place of endless meetings and partings, where my feelings did not matter.

No matter how much I loved her, I could not make her walk the path I desired her to.

I still vividly remembered her look of disbelief when I encouraged her to continue down the path she had chosen for herself. Of course, her disbelief had merit. However, my breakthrough hinged on not just saying that to her, but meaning it.

I had to accept that my feelings for her couldn’t change her, she could only change herself in response to my feelings. True change came from within. The opposite was also true. Her feelings had never changed me, I had changed myself.

The me who had met her was fundamentally different to the me who had yet to meet her. Not because of her, but because of me. I had learned to be tender and gentle, to be fierce and passionate, to be submissive and accepting. Those lessons I would carry with me for the rest of my life, regardless of whether or not our paths crossed again.

As would the memories of our intimacy. Not just our moments of pleasure, but the moments before and after, the natural flow of cause and effect as important as the memorable climaxes.

My idle thinking accompanied me all the way, arriving at my residence. Still deep in thought, I hadn’t paid much attention to my surroundings, but—

A ripple of water.

Without hesitation, I strode through and slid open the door to the courtyard and—

“Out of all the people in the world, it turns out I just happened to run into the one I want to spend the rest of my life with my first time,” Xiaoxiao said, softly smiling, sitting on the side of the pool with her feet in water.