“What are you two doing with those corpses, Throw them to the damned pit alrea……. Why the fuck are you eating them”   Asked General Krieg in a horrified tone

 

“Sir! I and Myst were eating them due to curiosity of what the golden thing on their stomachs were and to see whether they were poisonous or not!”

 

“Corporal Stein, I have no idea whether you are just THAT braindead or Retarded” said Gen. Krieg

 

Myst then proceeded to reply with a blooded mouth “No sir! We are making sure everyone knows whether these can be useful for humanity or poisonous!”

 

Gen. Krieg then told the both of them “Get the fuck out of my sight along with these corpses, and i better not see even a goddamned speck of blood or i WILL make both of you run for 8 hours straight”

 

“Sir Yes Sir!” Shouted both

 

And so, the Two brought all the corpses with the help of other soldiers and out of  curiosity the soldiers that were helping asked

 

Lieutenant Elk asks them both “So, what was the flavor of it?”

 

“Bad decisions” answered Stein    

“Onions covered in white chocolate” Myst tells

 

“So it was shit huh”

 

Private Ark then asks them “Did you gain anything from it? Like diseases or something?”

 

“This bastard can make pebbles float and i can summon some liquid that works like a whip” Answered Myst

 

*Crack* “I knew that Bad feeling wasn’t just from my ass” Calmly spoken by Stein before a loud noise was but he shouted

 

*Shrieking of an Idiot” 

 

*Sigh* “I’ll take him to the medical unit seeing as to how painful that must be”

 

“We’ll take care of the corpses so go” Answered The Lieutenant and Private Ark

 

The day ends with Stein still stuck at the medical unit as his entire pelvis got dislocated with his spine and their driver with an 80-hour run around the camp and of course, all soldiers knew of Stein and Myst’s shenanigans in less than two days.

 

Gen. Krieg gets a visit and asks “So might I ask why you are asking all of the soldiers to eat those golden orbs you found?”

 

“Well we’re all gonna die so might as well do something fun right?” Answers Stein

 

“I will give your shenanigans Five soldiers, and if you don’t give me good results… just know it won’t be a fun time for you”

 

“Understood!”

 

The commander sits and wonders to himself ‘I Just hope those retards don’t do shit dumb enough to be prblematic’

 

And so, The division of the seven Retards commence and this is basically what the pilot chapters are supposed to be and not just start the actual novel at chapter 3, but it just works

 

 

 

 

 

 

Mini Skit 

 

Stein and Hidenori’s Dad jokes

 battle

Stein: What’s the best thing about dating a homeless woman? 

Hidenori: What?

 

Stein:You can drop her off anywhere

 

*Snickering*

 

Hidenori: What did the Ocean say to the beach?

 

Stein: Oh Come on

 

Hidenori: nothing, it just WAVED!

 

Stein:...

 

Hidenori: Why do muslims write from left to right?

 

Stein: oh i don’t know this one! Why?

 

Hidenori:that's why im asking

 

Stein:Oh

 

My turn Said Myst “What do a tick and the Eiffel Tower have in common?"

 

                                           “They're both Paris sites.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

AN

Btw, These are supposed to show what occurred before the actual novel started so it’s going to be better now, and that’s all for this chapter so see ya’ll next time on stein’s shitty upload schedule, and yes, we did actually have a dad joke battle on our GC, it was quite glorious.