Yati

The music for this chapter Spotify link

“Why is everyone so quiet?” I asked while releasing the hands that I was holding. Somehow that suddenly felt very inappropriate in this atmosphere.

“It’s because 4 Saint Cecilia students just entered the room,” Axelle stated matter-of-factly as if it was the most normal thing in the world. “It’s even worse than yesterday. Probably because the conductor just made her first appearance. Every decision you make about them will determine their further careers. You decide who sits in the first or second row.”

I gulped. I looked around the room and noticed many people staring at me. Others were doing their best trying to become invisible. I could see some of the other cellists that Aleksei forced on me, and I could see they were happy that I, unlike Aleksei, greeted them.

Nastya seemed to be able to ignore all the stares, I really admired that part of her. But I felt incredibly self-conscious in this atmosphere. Sara also seemed really shy all of a sudden and said “This is why we asked to go and eat together. It’s scary to come here by ourselves.”

After taking a tray we moved through the line like everyone else to get our dinner. The friendly lady that was serving the food gave us a bright smile and said “Here, Tine told me you were feeling a bit under the weather, our kind has to support each other.”

 She gave me a handful of clementines for my dessert.

“Thanks, Ms.”

My mind started pondering like crazy about what “kind” she was talking about.

“Oh, Ms. Isn’t home. Just call me Annie.”

She was talking to me in such a familiar way as if she knew me. I noticed all the other girls only got one clementine.

She looked satisfied to have given me some extra. Like she had just done her good deed of the day, so I just took them and said, “Thank you, Annie.”

When we came out of the line, I was looking for a place to sit, but Axelle said, “Come, our table is over there.”

Apparently, all the dorms had their own assigned table, and Saint Cecilia, the smallest dorm in the school had just one large table, but since there was a window in which we were allowed to come to dinner only 3 people were sitting there already. They looked surprised when they were suddenly joined by 4 others and when they noticed I was among them I could see the look in their eyes change. They clearly felt nervous.

“What’s going on? Why are even the Saint Cecelia students scared of me?” I whispered to Axelle.

“Didn’t they tell you? Because you are the conductor. you will decide who among them gets to play a concerto at school concerts. Opportunities like that aren’t easy to come by.”

I sighed. I realized I would have to grow weary if people were friendly because they wanted something from me or because they really were my friends.

I decided to just introduce myself to the three that were sitting at our table. It would feel too strange otherwise. “I’m Fleure,” I said and offered them a handshake. The first to shake my hand introduced himself as Olle. He was the Swedish boy that played the tenor tuba that came in tenth at Flagey. I remembered Frank being really impressed with his performance, but I had not heard him play myself. He looked like a jovial type. His nervousness quickly dissipated when he noticed that I had just come over to say hi to my dormmates. It seems that all he needed was to see that I was a human being too.

The next one was a Greek girl named Ganna. She was a harpist and it seemed that she had been having a good time talking to Olle. I immediately got the feeling that she did not like me. All her answers were as short as possible clearly to end the conversation as fast as she could. Little did she know that that suited me just fine. It intrigued me a bit. I didn’t like those overly friendly people when meeting for the first time.

Speaking of which… Next up was Fabio, the Italian oboist. While introducing himself he acted like we were old friends and instead of shaking my hand he gave me a hug and a kiss on the cheek and started telling me about his summer with large gestures. Except for shaking his hand on the stage in Flagey, I had never met the boy before or after. I did not care about his summer, but I did notice that he had carefully slipped in little boasts about all his musical awards… Well, he sure made an overwhelming and unforgettable impression.

In the end, Axelle saved me from him by shouting that my food was getting cold. To my surprise Nastya then said “Let the girl eat her dinner, Fabio. You’ll have plenty of chances to talk later,” in a chiding tone that clearly showed they knew each other. I guess I should not be surprised that Nastya knew most of the international talents our age if you take all the competitions she played into account. But still… it made me a little anxious that the otherwise so distant Nastya had so many people that were close to her. It made me realize that I did not know all that much about Nastya. Well, she only just acknowledged me as her friend, but it seemed I had just taken the place of one of many… I shook my head. This should not bother me, now should it?

I thanked both Nastya and Axelle for rescuing me. Nastya just silently smiled and nodded, and Axelle replied more archly “No need to thank me. You just promised to have dinner with us, and I wasn’t going to let some boy steal you away from our first dinner date.” She gave me a little wink while she teased me, but I knew she helped me because she noticed I started to feel uncomfortable. She was a lot kinder than her womanizing Casanova front suggested. I started to wonder how much of that reputation was really true. I got the feeling she more using that front to hide her embarrassment.

While Sara and Axelle were happily talking away, I was happy to just quietly listen and only pitched in once in a while. Nastya, on the other hand, kept herself to herself and because of that she finished her food first and immediately excused herself to go back to the dorms. She told us she was already late for her evening practice. She was right I probably should do the same. As soon as I finished my meal, I gave an extra clementine to Sara and Axelle and wished them a good evening. On my way out I ran into Frank who, after asking how I was feeling, told me where I needed to be for my morning class tomorrow. He seemed to be well aware of my schedule. After all, he was the trumpet teacher, so it didn’t have much to do with him... Well, he was probably just being helpful due to my trip to the nurse’s office earlier.

“Is he harassing you?” A voice suddenly interrupted us. I looked up to see Annie with a large ladle in her hand.

“I wasn’t. I was talking to her about school stuff!” Frank said defensively. “I wouldn’t harass girls.”

“Well, you harassed my girl just this morning.” That allegation caused a serious ruckus among the crowd.

“Ahum” A nervous troat scrape resounded. “Your girl? What are you talking about?” Frank looked around a bit panicky. All eyes in the cafeteria were on us. Did he really make a pass at a schoolgirl? I knew he was a creepy old guy. But I did not think he was that creepy. I felt somewhat disappointed in him. I did not realize he could still disappoint me in the creep department.

“Tine. You made a pass at Tine! The school nurse!”

Somehow, I felt relieved that it was just that and not something to do with a student. I noticed that most people in the cafeteria had turned back around like nothing special was happening. It was true what she was saying. I had heard his cringy one-liner. I just hoped it stayed at that.

But that also meant… I looked again at Annie.

“Aren’t you a bit young to be Tine’s mom?” I asked flabbergasted.

Her angry face immediately burst out laughing. “Of course, I am. I am not her mom, she’s, my girlfriend!”

I cringed at my own stupid remark. Why was I always so incredibly dense about this kind of stuff?

Frank hastily started apologizing while he was nervously stumbling over his words. At the same time, Annie looked at him like he was the lowest of the lowest. I left him to clean up his own mess. I wasn’t about to feel sorry for him. I heard Aunt Christina’s story and I knew he could be really creepy.

When I got to my room, instead of my regular practice I started practicing in a different way. In order to give the classes that Aleksei made me give, I needed to get better at notation. I took out the score to Massenet’s Meditation from Thais that I had been working on.

Instead of just working on the piece as I would normally do, I started practicing playing the song like the score dictated, if I wanted to play something different, I made sure to first change it on the score accordingly. The score was the only way that I was allowed to communicate with my students after all, so I needed to get this skill under my belt. This was a lot harder than I thought and I often had to plow through my musical lexicon to find the exact term or notation that I was looking for.

I practiced until late when I heard a teacher making their way through the hallway announcing that it was time for curfew.