Shmd

Heya, new chapter!

Happy reading,

With love, Sh'.

 

Chapter 48 : Tempus fugit (Skills chasing/Am I a bad person?)

 

Unspecified skyscraper rooftop, unspecified neighborhood, Manhattan, New York, 10th of February, 22:37

 

Iris and I’s quarry and his spouse had finally decided to call it a night after an early evening spent cuddling in front of the TV.

 

I was standing atop their building while lazily waiting for the both of them to fall asleep, my features hidden in our more traditional three colored full jumpsuit battleform.

 

“[Interrogation, boredom] : How many more must we do, blood-sister?” Iris mentally asked me with a borderline sleepy tone.

 

My sister knew that what we were doing right now was important but she couldn’t help not really feeling enthused by it.

 

It was lacking excitement in her opinion but she knew that I wouldn’t budge.

 

“Let’s see : we have Military CQC, Krav Maga, Systema, Capoeira, Jiu Jitsu, Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, Karate, Thai box, Kickboxing, HEMA and we’re about to have Taekwondo.” I list mentally, “I’d say three or four more and we’ll be done for the time being.”

 

Since I had been able to both make myself multiple thought streams and accelerate my mind, Iris and I have been busy ‘shopping’ for martial art knowledge.

 

I am running four different thought streams nowadays. The first one dubbed ‘social’ remains still at a non-dilated time perception and is the one I use for everything that doesn’t really need instantaneous reactions, and three others running fifteen times faster that got to work on other problems like how to give humanity a better fighting chance against aliens, do my homework in a records’ time or, like they had been for the last three days, create two comprehensive martial arts by compiling existing ones.

 

One for flyers and one for hyperactive spider girls.

 

“[Anticipation, relief, boredom] : Let’s just get this over with so I can go back to give you cuddles.” Iris huffs on our mind-link.

 

I chuckle as I mentally hug her.

 

“You know that this is all very important, sister.” I chide her gently.

 

“[Shame, boredom] : I know, it’s just that this isn’t very thrilling.” She answers awkwardly.

 

Stalking ‘prey’ for hours at a time without fighting them afterward is apparently offensive to her sensibilities.

 

“It’ll be over soon, I promise.” I answer aloud, feeling the mental feedback of the twice golden medalled olympic Taekwondo champion starting to settle to sleep along his wife's own.

 

Narrowing my focus on the two mental ropes, I gently start to push along them a suggestion that will put the both of them deeper into sleep territory.

 

A few minutes later, when I’m satisfied with their sleepiness, I start to release a calming aura around myself as I simultaneously teleport in their room following the other mental rope.

 

I’m greeted by a view of two people cuddling each other while sleeping peacefully and I have to refrain myself from cooing because the picture itself is quite cute.

 

Iris doesn’t have those qualms and does so openly on our mind-link.

 

I reassert my levitation until I can reach the tall man from asian descent, softly laying my hands on his temples.

 

It doesn’t take long before I am properly in his mind and I start to copy his skills, sending them to my accelerated thought streams to puzzle them out in addition to all the others I’ve collected earlier this week.

 

Since I have the benefit of three thought streams analyzing what I send them way faster than should be possible, it barely takes a few minutes before I know the ins and outs of Taekwondo like someone who practiced it for decades.

 

It doesn’t make me a professional by any means though. I will still have to train to gain the muscle and reflexive memories that only dedication can bring out.

 

Once it is over, Aria bring something out of her pocket space that I levitate to Mr. Champion’s bed table.

 

Each time I copied someone’s knowledge, I decided to give them twenty grand for their unknowing participation in raising a team of supers.

 

The money I pilfered from Filsk’s pockets when I raided his warehouse is starting to run low by now but it would have left a bad taste in my mouth if I just came and ripped out the knowledge out of normal citizen’s skulls for my own benefits without any sort of compensation.

 

That kind of behavior would have been too Xavier-ish for my taste and I refuse to stoop so low.

 

My deed done, I look through the window, teleporting outside a fraction of a second later.

 

“Alright, time to find a very good Judoka now,” I comment aloud as I start to fly away, tapping distractingly into the internet with one strand of thought, “And we’ll call it a night afterward.”

 

Iris just lazily flickers a feeling of [Agreement] on our mind-link as I continue my self appointed task.

 

***

Aria’s bedroom, the Thompson’s house, Forest Hills, Queens, New York, 12th of February, 23:21, in Iris’ mind.

 

Without any prompting of Loved-cherished-blood-sister-Aria’s part, Iris oozed and melted out of her body into a full body cocoon as soon as the both of them laid down on her blood-sister’s bed, instinctively seeking the maximal amount of contact with her she-host for comfort.

 

Not paying any heed about Loved-cherished-blood-sister-Aria startled noises, Iris instantly went to hug her most precious sister with both her arms and her full body, squeezing her tightly.

 

To her shame, Iris started to mock-shiver slightly, conditioned as she was to emulate the proper humanoid reaction to her situation.

 

“Alright, something is wrong.” Loved-cherished-blood-sister-Aria cautiously said, hugging Iris’ ‘torso’ back, “What is it sister?”

 

Iris hesitated for a beat.

 

Mock-exhaling after reminding herself that Loved-cherished-blood-sister-Aria wouldn’t judge her for it, Iris started to explain.

 

“It’s the hive-mind.” She softly explained to her most important person, “I’m cut out of it since we started to psy-shield ourselves and…”

 

She mock-gulped to better convey her distress, her grip tightening on Loved-cherished-blood-sister-Aria’s back.

 

“...I think it’s making me sick.” Iris lamely admitted, not really seeing a better way to explain her conundrum to her she-host.

 

“Oh.” Loved-cherished-blood-sister-Aria simply answered.

 

Her she-host paused for a bit, mulling over something way too fast for Iris to understand her thoughts-that-blurs on their mind-link.

 

“That’s why you were unusually moody those last three days, isn’t it?” Loved-cherished-blood-sister-Aria asked for confirmation.

 

Her she-host didn’t need to ask since their thoughts were plain as day to each other, but that’s how their collaborating-symbiotic-loving relationship worked.

 

Iris wordlessly mock-nodded in confirmation at the same time as she hid her head in the crook of her she-host’s neck.

 

Her she-host went silent for a beat.

 

“Are you scared because you think that letting our shields down from time to time is the only way to make you feel better?” Loved-cherished-blood-sister-Aria finally asked, her tone understanding and attentive.

 

Iris hesitated.

 

“...I don’t know.” She answered lamely, “I was hoping you’ll come up with a solution about it.”

 

Instead of answering, Loved-cherished-blood-sister-Aria, from her own initiative, mentally flexed and both of her minds aligned.

 

Iris instantly sagged in relief, her death grip on her she-host lessening.

 

“[Relief, understanding] : Alright, that’s something at least.” Loved-cherished-blood-sister-Aria mentally said on their merged-mind, “As I suspected, merging alleviates the symptoms. Tell me about them by the way.”

 

“I wouldn’t know where to start.” Iris answered awkwardly, “It’s as if something was missing and I’m obsessing over it a little bit more as each day comes to pass.”

 

The multi layered mind of her she-host churned for a bit.

 

“[Hesitation, understanding, worry] : I think your maker made your kind dependent on your connection to your hive-mind.” Her she-host theorized, “What you describe is suspiciously close to a withdrawal syndrome, albeit a very slow one that I’m surprised took this long to start being uncomfortable to you.”

 

After perusing her shared-memories, Iris hesitantly nodded in the crook of Loved-cherished-blood-sister-Aria’s neck.

 

“I think you’re right, it does look like it, blood-sister.” The Klyntar confirmed.

 

“[Confidence, worry] : I think that you were able to cope with it better than you should because we are balanced.” Her she-host carried on, “Though keeping you stable in our day to day life may be difficult. Tell me, how is the imprinting process coming along ?”

 

“I’m not sure, blood-sister.” Iris answered, “I feel the beginning of something, but we’re not quite there yet.”

 

Loved-cherished-blood-sister-Aria hmed under her breath, prompting Iris to do the same due to their merged-state.

 

“[Confidence, decisiveness] : Alright, that problem will solve itself on its own once you’ll be able to spawn your first offspring.” Loved-cherished-blood-sister-Aria commented, “How long do you think it’ll take?”

 

Iris pondered for a beat.

 

“I think I’ll be ready in a year?” She answered hesitantly.

 

“[Confidence] : So we need a momentary solution that’ll hold until next february.” Her she-host paused, her multi layered mind churning, “What if I do this ?”

 

Iris focused, trying to feel-hear-touch-perceive if something was different.

 

“I don’t feel any different.” She said so to her she-host.

 

“[Confidence, amusement] : Pay a closer look to our merged-mind.” Loved-cherished-blood-sister-Aria answered with a mental chuckle.

 

Iris did just so.

 

In the mental space that they shared, the connection between her own mind and the three accelerated thought streams of her she-host had come back to normal, only leaving the normal one merged with hers.

 

Her upslanted eyes widened a little in an expression of mock-astonishment and she raised her ‘head’ to look at her she-host.

 

“You can do that?” She exclaimed aloud.

 

“[Amusement, relief, confidence] : Apparently. It’s not even that hard to maintain.” Her she-host answered, her ice blue eyes twinkling, “It’ll probably lapse when one of us is asleep, but it should help you deal with it until your telepathy has grown and we can set up your own hive-mind, one free of Knull’s influence.”

 

Mock-shuddering in delight at Loved-cherished-blood-sister-Aria’s words, Iris squeezed the whole of her she-host’s body very tight with the whole of her mass in an explosion of [Relief, love, care, happiness].

 

The two of them stayed like that for a while, her she-host reciprocating the Klyntar’s feelings both mentally and physically by gripping her a bit tighter.

 

“You really were scared that you’d have to merge with the hive-mind once more, didn't you?” Loved-cherished-blood-sister-Aria softly asked after a while.

 

Iris mock-bit her lips, hiding her head into the crook of her she-host’s neck once more.

 

Only once she was satisfied that she was back in her place of comfort, safely hidden under her she-host snow white curls, did she take her time to answer.

 

“I…,” She started, pausing to gather her thoughts, “No, I really didn’t want to…”

 

Feeling her discomfort, Loved-cherished-blood-sister-Aria put a protective hand onto her ‘head’ and started to slowly massage her ‘scalp’ while playing with her ‘hair’.

 

“Do you want to tell me why?” Her she-host soothingly asked, “I’ll understand if you do not but maybe it could help.”

 

Another futile yet ritualistic gesture, since the both of them perfectly knew why.

 

Iris was her she-host and Loved-cherished-blood-sister-Aria was her, after all.

 

Nonetheless, Iris chose to speak.

 

“I don’t think I’m willing to share what we have.” She started after a while, her crystalline voice slightly muffled by her she-host locks, “And I’d rather not have the others taint me and ruin it.”

 

She mock-frowned her upslanted eyes, thinking harder.

 

“What we have, what we share, is so rare it barely ever happens.” She carried on as a mixture of courage and pride filled her, “I know I’m supposed to share it with the collective, that thousands of us could be helped by witnessing it. Yet…”

 

Iris paused once more as she realized the enormity of her truth.

 

“Yet I don’t want to.” She admitted with some difficulty, cognizant of her betrayal of her species’ ideals, “I don’t want to be like them, locked into an eternal battle for dominance against a mad and dark god. I don’t want to share what I am and what we have, feeling the beauty of it fraying at its edges for the benefit of others. I don’t want to risk potentially losing myself in the event of the collective going dark once again. I’m so far from them, one edge of the universe away after eons spent traveling in a rock. I don’t feel like I owe them anything beyond being grateful for being alive and having the chance to meet you because our existence is wonderful. But I’d do everything to not lose it.”

 

Iris mock-sighed.

 

“And that includes cutting myself away from them.” She concluded.

 

Iris stayed silent for a beat.

 

“I know that I should feel guilty about giving up on them, but…” She said after a while, only Loved-cherished-blood-sister-Aria’s silence prompting her to continue, “But the truth is that I don’t.”

 

Her grip tightened on her she-host back as she asked the question that she had on the back of her mind since she realized the truth of her feelings.

 

“Am I a bad person?” She finally said, voice breaking a little.

 

Loved-cherished-blood-sister-Aria’s sighed in her multi-layered voice of virtues and sins, the one she had inherited from a life-code hazard, but it didn’t phase Iris.

 

Truth to be told, the Klyntar always found it soothing.

 

“Why would wanting to live your life happily and for yourself would make you a bad person, sister of mine?” Her she-host asked with an edge of tiredness in her voice.

 

Iris knew that it wasn’t because of her, but rather due to having to make that argument so many times to so many people in a previous life.

 

“You know it’s not because you’re me just as much as I am you.” Loved-cherished-blood-sister-Aria carried on softly while playing with her hair, “If, like any sensible person, you feel like someone or something has a negative aspect on your happiness, walking away from them or it is the only logical option.”

 

“Even if I could help them?” Iris asked lamely.

 

“Are you responsible for them?” Her she-host bluntly asked, “Were you born to satisfy a purpose or for no reason at all because life has no meaning other than the one we choose to give it?”

 

Iris mulled over that for a beat.

 

“I know it’s the first but I wish it was the second.” She answered.

 

Her she-host two hand gently took her head out of her hiding spot to bring the both of them face-to-face.

 

“It’s because you’re like me.” Loved-cherished-blood-sister-Aria pointed out with a soft smile, “You’d rather not have to deal with what the universe chose to throw at you when you were born if it makes you unhappy. You don’t want to deal with all that Klyntar’s duty bull because you’re happier just hanging out in my body. And you’d go to any length necessary to maintain the status quo and be happy, cut out from the hive-mind, because deep down you’re a bit selfish.”

 

Iris mock-tensed lightly.

 

“But so is everyone,” Aria carried on gently as her thumbs slowly rubbed Iris’ temples, “At least amids humans. And you know because you know me like nobody else can that it take an equal mix of courage, pride and selfishness to come and say ‘fuck you’ to the universe at large when you realize it didn’t give you the chance to be happy. So you make your own chance yourself.”

 

Mimicking her she-host motion, Iris hands gripped her softly on her temples too.

 

Simultaneously pulling each other head together, symbiote and host ended up soon enough with their forehead touching.

 

“If you think cutting yourself from them is what will make you happy, then do it.” Her she-host continued, “If you can’t bear the idea of having to merge with the hive-mind, then don’t. And when it is time for you to create a new life and you want them free from that burden, I promise that I’ll help you with all my strength.”

 

“I love you, blood-sister.” Iris mock-blurted out, her star-filled voice choked with emotion.

 

“And I love you too, Iris.” Loved-cherished-blood-sister-Aria answered with a soft smile.

 

As the two of them kept gazing into each other’s eyes, reaffirming their bond once more, Iris realized once more the luck she had to have met her host.

Shmd

I always planned for Iris to be cut from the hive-mind because it was a liability, so here are the reasons why she don't want to belong to it anymore.

It also gave me an opportunity to talk about happiness and remind some readers that no one but themselves should dictate how they should be happy.

You're your own person and you shouldn't be feel guilty to be a little bit selfish if it is what it takes to reach your happiness.

Once again, with love, Sh'.