Vessel

Unlike souls, the 'Eye' of a Stormfolk was a very physical space. At the center of many large Storms lay a pristine expanse of solid terrain upon which trophies could be collected and spirited away. We just had to get past lethal winds and their preference for traveling over the bodies of water they fed upon.

With that much accomplished, fighting a Storm was the wrong word for what we needed to do.

Stormfolk complained the loudest about being dispersed or diminished in some way. The storm overhead, my creator, was too big to redirect or turn away. Lastly, we would have been hard pressed to find anything bigger to put between us and them for shelter.

Of the three traditional options for dealing with a Stormfolk, we really only had one path open to us. We needed to diminish them in some small way. Convincing them to leave would be something we figured out later.

Needing to start somewhere, I attempted to get their attention with my best booming voice.

"Hey! You ole windbag! It's been seasons since you've last spoken to family. Come on out. You've got guests!" The puzzled look Ruin gave me suggested the effect I was aiming for left something to be desired. What could I say to that? If I was good at being me, we wouldn't be in this mess in the first place.

The whole space shook as the clouds darkened. A thunderous voice bellowed and the winds that circled the eye drew closer. Ruin tightened her hold on me as the wind picked up and hit us with the full force of the Storm's voice.

"I SEE NO SCION OF MINE. WHERE IS THE ONE WHO BRAVED THE BANE OF LIGHTNING AND WASHED AWAY DEFIANT A DEN OF MONSTERS FOUR MOONS PAST? REVEAL THEM TO ME AND I MAY SHOW YOU MERCY."

Every word being a physical blow was one thing. But these words were something else entirely. Was I not being acknowledged? I was past the point of wanting anything to do with being their inheritor. Why did their lack of recognition still hurt? 

I knew I should have felt something. Instead I felt myself growing hollow and fumbled for words.

The Storm grew quiet and Ruin began to grit her teeth. It was her turn to shout. "You contemptable waste of a weather pattern! Have you no respect for the dead? Your child is hurting and that's the first thing ya have to say for yourself?"  The way her hand squeezed at my arm told me she was trying to be supportive. "Show me something physical so I can fish that self righteous voice from whatever you use for lungs!"

Clouds gathered and swirled overhead. A spiral of blackened wind descended to meet us at the Storm's center. Ruin and I were immediately in danger of being swept up in the tornado that was my father's undivided attention. There was nothing to grab onto but debris. Ruìn fought with her free arm anyways. She brushed the first stone projectile aside. Next to hurtle in our direction were the long broken remains of a ship's mast. Ruin caught it under her free arm before being swept off our feet and up into the swirling winds. The two of us were at the Storm's mercy now.

"Think ya can get the old windbag to try and drown us?" The sound of the winds around us were now loud enough that Ruin shouted to be heard. "Flying is more Verity and Whisper's thing!"

The mast did intercept the first bolt of lightning to come our way. It splintered before sending us flying free of the howling winds. Ruin broke the fall for me, tucking me into both her arms as we hit the ground and began to roll. With a grunt, Ruin found her feet and lifted me up moments before thunder sounded a warning. Another bolt was coming.

"Jump." I said, as soon as I could suck in a breath.

Ruin did and I allowed my free arm to explode at the shoulder, carrying us out of the path of the lightning bolt that scorched the ground where Ruin had stood moments ago.

We landed on a low hanging cloud lingering nearby. It was a soft and fluffy one that had been dyed pink earlier today. "Thanks sis." 

Ruin had never witnessed me fight. I guess I wasn't sure what I could have said to prepare her for that maneuver. With the lives of friends on the line, there was little I wasn't willing to do to gain an advantage in a fight. It was a little self destructive, but I hoped she'd go easy on me. The reprimand never came.

"You're soft."

A face I knew well poked out of the cloud. Verity made a point to stare with her furrowed brows. I blinked wordlessly. Neither of us offered Ruin anything more than that.

"I mean. Thanks for the save." Ruin scrambled to her feet, adjusting her hold on me before looking me over to make sure I was alright. Only then did she check herself for injuries.

"Where did you find this big softy anyhow? I don't think we were ever properly introduced." Verity looked the two of us over with a relieved smile. We were alright and I was in good hands. Better than I deserved.

"Oh, that's Ruin." I craned my neck to look up at her. No words came to me. Why were some things so easy and others so hard? After a few moments I decided to channel something I'd heard Amari say. "She's a... very dear friend, even if she can be a big armful."

Ruin had the biggest smile spread across her face.

Whisper joined us, having retrieved my arm for me. I immediately began to invest precious sand into binding the limb once more to my shoulder. There was no time or material to waterproof it. I would have to make do.

"NO CHILD OF MINE WOULD DIMINISH THEMSELVES SO."

Verity looked like she had been struck by the words. It was how I felt, but Verity didn't see it that way. I could only imagine what this confrontation had been like for her. She had been here longer than I had. What had I missed?

"NO. IT IS FAR MORE LIKELY YOU FOUND YOURSELVES PIECES OF DIVINITY LEFT IN MY SCION'S WAKE AND THOUGHT WEARING OUR TRAPPINGS MIGHT ELEVATE YOU. ALLOW ME TO SHOW YOU THE ERROR OF YOUR WAYS."

A sustained torrent of wind threw everything the Storm had as us. Verity's cloud grew to shield us as much as she could manage with a series of hisses as she redirected wind and water off to the side. It was the physical debris that she struggled to do anything about. The end of the Storm's assault was punctuated by a sharp cry of pain as something struck home. I realized in that moment that Whisper wasn't just bracing alongside Verity. She was clinging to a stone at Verity's center for dear life.

The howling gale began to die down and the Storm fell silent. I had no hangups in projecting a sense of smug satisfaction as it took the opportunity reassess those of us who remained on our feet. Despite Verity receiving the worst of it, Ruin and I had been the ones knocked to the ground.

Whisper took a deep breath before turning to give us a look. She seemed relieved to know we were okay, but her smile was a fragile one. "Well, it's not as a bad as it looks."

"A Bolt Stone." Ruin whistled as she jogged back up to Verity and Whisper for a closer look. "Those don't break easily. They're the reason the town was built on the coast."

Verity looked back at the two of us, her gaseous form fighting to maintain its grip on a shattered stone at her core. "I was counting on it. Sorry." She maintained the trappings of a Storm, but her hair must have seemed a tiny excuse for a cloud. In a way I could see things the way the Storm did. We were so tiny by comparison.

Amassing all our might and approaching a town had been how we were expected to earn our name as a Stormfolk. I unconsciously found myself looking up at Ruin from my position in her arms. Her town would have come up with a name for the approaching Storm long before we arrived. Surely she would know it.

No, that wasn't me anymore. I neither needed nor wanted to know. Some things remained my burden to bear.

I turned my head back to Verity, a question had formed at the back of my mind. If I didn't ask now, would I ever allow myself to in the future? "That Bolt Stone. Is that um, how you did it?" I didn't have a perfect memory of the event. I only remembered the approach. We were pried apart before reaching the town's natural mitigating features. Everything after that was hard to remember beyond the pain. I only vaguely recalled what it felt like to be torn in half, but I still wanted to hear her side of things. If she did not offer up an answer, I decided in that moment that I would not press her further.

Verity gave me only a slow nod in reply, eyes averted. I tried to avoid projecting shame onto the motion. It would remain a messy subject for the both of us then.

I didn't so much as sigh as let go of the breath I had been holding. "It changes nothing."

"Does it though?" Whisper was the one to challenge me. "We've risked a lot just getting here. And if all this is from the Storm not even recognizing you, do we really want to provoke it further?"

I wasn't entirely sure what to make of that. Not that I could be trusted to be sure of anything. My grip on the glass knife loosened just a bit before tightening. "I think so. Yeah. We could mitigate this now, make it easier on everyone else."

"At what cost?" The black shapes in Whisper's deep red eyes grew still. The shape of some insect's wings presented themselves as large as they could. I bit my lip. There was something in those eyes that made me uncomfortable.

"I am not afraid of a few more scars." Ruin grinned from ear to ear, almost literally. She had a lot of teeth. "I'm game to brave facing off against this Stormfolk if it does some good."

"I can't run away from this." I said, hanging my head in an attempt to avoid being perceived. Being vulnerable was hard enough. "The Storm that spawned us being here is just a convenient physical representation of the problem. I get that. Amari pointed it out already. I'm still clinging to this thunderous core inside me and it is slowly tearing me apart. When this storm howls for its lost child, a part of me echoes their cries. I just can't be that thing anymore, but I'm not sure I'm ready to throw it all away." And I now suspected Verity shared my feelings to some extent.

Whisper turned her eyes to the shattered anchor responsible for allowing Verity to cling to a small cloud of vapor and water that filled out a nearly broken body of flesh. "Please don't push yourself for our sakes."

Verity grimaced, and the cloud around us withdrew. "It's fine." She said, her voice hoarse and eyes beginning to mist. "I'll be fine."

The three of us shared looks of concern. Whisper found the words before I did. "I need to know. What is this all worth to you?"

That got Verity to glower. "I won't go back. I refuse to see the world as Stormfolk do."

"You don't have to see the world like them. If it feels wrong to you, listen to yourself." Whisper leaned close enough to touch her forehead to Verity's. Something quiet passed between them as Verity withdrew the pink cloud inside herself.

Whisper's words touched a chord within me that prompted a clutching of Ruin's arm. She looked down at me with a raised eyebrow. "I keep wondering which I'll find first, what feels right or what breaks me. This feels like something I can make right, but I don't know if I can trust myself yet."

Ruin offered me a soft smile that showed no teeth. "Who are you trying to make this right to? You may think yourself small, but you knew what you were getting into. And still you swam until your legs gave out. That makes you bigger than them. Ves, you have dared to become so much more than what you've come from."

I wasn't sure what to say to that, so I turned the question back on her. "What about you? You're not just here to carry me like a child." It came out more aggressive than I intended. I might have felt like a burden, but a part of me was okay with it.

Ruin looked away with a focused intent. She wasn't brushing me off. Thunder was beginning to sound as the Storm prepared to renew its assault. "I'll accept scars for a little revenge. But I failed to save my friends once. I won't let that happen again."

My voice sounded so small all of a sudden. "Ruin. You know I don't deserve that."

She gave my arm a gentle squeeze. "Then keep going Ves. You've only taken the first step to finding your way. Don't turn back now. Make it worthwhile."

"Okay." Was all I had to say. I didn't feel okay. But never before did I want so badly to feel okay than in that moment.

Ruin turned her attention to Verity, thoughtful. "Whisper. Your dress is in tatters."

Whisper looked down at her dress and sighed.

The wind began to pick up. Ruin turned away with me in hand, steeling herself to brave the winds once more.

"Ruin you beautiful genius!"

Ruin cracked a smile. "C'mon Ves. Let us give these ladies some privacy."

I managed to steal a look at Verity. Her body was broken, but her dress remained entirely unharmed. "What?"

"You don't break Souls or their constructs by hitting them. Their sources are intangible. You have to hit someone where it hurts. So long as we don't get too reckless, I wager Verity's dress and that pretty knife of yours will be no worse for wear."

I looked down at the knife. It was holding up better than my hands were. A wager, I understood that. Stormfolk often traded dares and bets.

I squeezed Ruin's arm to get her attention. "I need you to understand that this whole place is a sham."

She smiled an easy smile, despite the situation. "Yeah, well, you might think your body is a prison but we've all seen you change over the course of just a couple days."

"No. I mean. Ruin, focus!"

Ruin turned to face away from the wind. Something broke against her but she didn't show it beyond having to adjust her stance. "I am." She took that moment to look me in the eyes. "And I thought you said confronting the Storm was just a convenient representation of the real foe eating at  you."

The wind grew in intensity. We couldn't have gone further if we wanted to. Thunder sounded. Lightning would be soon to follow. Before I could warn her, Ruin pulled me into an embrace so tight I dared not try the maneuver again. She then leapt into the air and let the wind carry us barreling out of the line of fire.

"YOU ARE TROUBLESOME LITTLE THINGS."

Verity and Whisper took flight, but the Storm wasn't having it. One of the many clouds overhead dropped all at once. Wind and water hammered the pair of them into the ground. Verity was quick to collect herself, the Bolt Stone at her heart bound by the dress spun from her soul. Whisper was the one having trouble now. Her wings didn't hold up well against wind and rain.

"Ruin!" Whisper called. They needed a distraction.

"I'm on it!" Ruin turned me to face the Storm and held me up. "You're searching for your lost little Storm right? Well you're looking at them! It split off as it approached the Bolt Stones. We named them Verity and Vessel!

"I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF YOUR MONSTROUS LIES."

The clouds loosed their grip on Verity and Whisper, gathering into a swirl to redirect its attention to Ruin.

"So what if they're small? They dared to try something different! Shouldn't you be PROUD?"

Thunder began to sound. This time from more than one cloud at once. Ruin turned at the last minute to dodge the first bolt of lightning that came our way. "Verity, show this windbag what you can do."

Verity launched herself to intercept the next few bolts, absorbing them with ease. A much greater cloud attempted to swat her out of the sky. It didn't stop her, but it slowed her long enough for that last bolt to strike Ruin.

She crashed to the ground, the impact jostling my weakened arm free. Verity turned with an alarmed cry. "Vessel! No!"

"I got them." Whisper darted, this time on foot to collect my arm. But the damage was done. Ruin was down, I was pinned underneath her, and Verity was locked down.

"CLEARLY MY SCION NEEDS A LESSON IN FINISHING WHAT HE STARTED."

The sound Verity made was too raw to be coherent. The dress that had been binding her core together began to come undone. Was it the thought of not being able to save me or Whisper? Or was the willful failure of our parent to acknowledge us starting to affect her? Did their words carry enough weight to invalidate our existence? There were too many potential explanations. All of them made me retreat inward. I wanted to shut down and fall apart.

But I wasn't ready to let go. Amari's white robe may have been in tatters, my crystal hairpin long lost, and this blank body damaged, but I remained loathe to discard her work. A part of me was afraid what would happen if I came undone and got swept up in the Storm. Would my sense of self disappear entirely?

Ruin grimaced and pushed through the pain writ plainly upon her face. "Amari trusted you." She pushed forward despite everything, a determination alight in her eyes. "That knife is special. She plucked it from her soul because she sees something in you." Ruin closed her eyes tight as she tried to suck in a breath. Anything and everything to brave a few more steps. "I see it too. But none of that matters. Not me. Not her. And certainly not that Storm overhead."

A knee gave out from beneath Ruin as thunder sounded overhead. She pressed me down and took another bolt of lightning to the back. "That knife is," her breath grew hoarse as she pushed out what she felt needed to be said. "In your hands now. Your choice."

In that quiet moment before she fell to the side, I had to come to terms with how frail my body of sand, clay and flesh held together now only by hopes and dreams really was. My body screamed, and my soul sang with it until there was nothing left in my lungs.

They could take away my ability to walk. They could crush the air and words from my lungs. But I could grin and bear it when Ruin carried me in her arms. The world was a little less miserable. It made more sense. It wasn't quite right, but it was something I wanted.

Whisper was at my side now. "Just tell me what you need of me." She looked at me with a sort of calculated concern softened by a small smile.

I craved that connection. "You all being here for me was enough."

I knew what I had to do. There was no question what world I wanted to be a part of.

I plunged the knife and carved out a place for myself in this world.

When I first came here, I had hoped to carve out a piece of divinity for myself. But I did so misunderstanding the source of Verity's euphoria.

What held me back wasn't something I was missing. I had been carrying the source of my anguish this whole time. Verity had been right to discard it.

Another loud crack of thunder sounded. This time from me. This time for good. I expelled all of it.

Lights flashed. They would have been blinding had I not been struggling to keep my eyes open.

Such a brilliant gold and blue. I fought to stay conscious.

Was that daylight overhead?

No. It couldn't be.

It was the dead of night.

"IT SEEMS I WAS MISTAKEN."

The Storm sounded further away now. That couldn't have been my doing, could it?

"I WOULD RECOGNIZE SUCH THUNDEROUS STRENGTH ANYWHERE. MY CHILD, WHAT HAS BECOME OF YOU?"

Pain caused me to suck in one last breath. Enough for a few last gasps.

"I am. Your Vessel. No longer."

And with that, I relinquished my claim to heat and air altogether.

I was utterly spent.

Existing was hard. I needed rest.

After all this I just wanted to not exist for a while.

The others would have to manage without me for the night.

 

***

 

A sweet song of a voice sounded oh so gently in my head.

"It's okay. You're okay. You're safe now."

"Go away." I thought? Said? I was too tired to think. I just wanted to sleep.

"I was wondering when I would get to meet you, but that can wait. You can rest for as long as you like."

Someone cradled me in their arms. It was more than I deserved, but I was too hollow and spent to argue.