Previously on the ShitShow part 2

Oookay . Are you ready Aaron ? You are not ? It is fine , I know you aren't.   7 weeks is too soon . Even I'm not ready. But look what I've got here on my table. Cosmic dust. 3 kilometers in each line by the way.

Cosmic duuust~ Cosmic dust

I've got a lot

Now you see it , now you're not.

Ssssnnnnnnnn... wow , and another one Ssssshhhhnnn . Uff , shit. Hooo.

So I'm ready my boy . Do you hear me Aaron ? Hey , Aa~ron ? A A Ron ? Nah , deaf bastard , still too young. But I'll sing for you anyway.

You're on the highway to hell ...And I'm your Uber , bitch.

And what do we have here ? Father , mother , freshly graduated from the highschool . Oh , and full set of grandparents  . We'll see.

Boring , so let's fast forward- 8 weeks , 9 weeks , 10 wee... STOP !

Abortion ? Money issues , you say ? To abort or not to abort ? Shakespeare sends a like

Nope , my boy . I'll make sure that you will touch labia minora of your mother with your own ears . Ears of ideal form , for a minute. Let's make your gramps move up on career ladder . Money ? Here , take it.

But , let's mess politic scene of your future homeland a little. Revolution is a good present for birthday , isn't ?

FAst forward , full throttle . 11 , 12 ...31 weeks . Oops , dark holes are so attractive , I suppose I didn't miss anything but let's watch some news .

"Ruling party is being overthrown by opposition , which mainly consists of sexual minorities. Country K is experiencing economic crisis and lack of trust in institute of marriage . Will our country adapt to abrupt changes till the New year ? God bless K ! And for now let's get back to the studio to hear opinions of our exp.."

Oh girl , you should make your wishes carefully. And New Year you say ? Hey , Aaron , will you forgive me if you pop out slightly earlier ? Exactly 31 ? Nope ? Who cares.Fast forward.

32,33,34,35 .Ho , Ho , Ho motherfucker. So , kid , what do we have here :

1) You are very much McClain , but you aren't John .

2) Vagina is not an air vent .

3) We have missed Christmas .

4) I don't have a machine gun. 

Aforementioned facts are solid signs of medical drama incoming .

Wow , your mom surely can scream .

" Victoria McClain , 18 y. o. , was sent to our hospital with acute migrating abdominal pain, high temperature. There are no signs of labor .Now she's undergoing ultrasound analysis What is your opinion dr. Condominium ? "

" It's not a Lupus. "

" Seriously ? "

" Sorry , old habit . Jokes aside , girl's situation is very tricky . I'm almost sure it's acute appendicitis. If  ultrasound  shows bad position of appendix , her case will be literally shitty. And pain in my leg tells me that Gods are not on her side . Get ready for operation and send notice to Chief of ICU about reservation for two "

" Two ?"

" Baby will say Hello world ! tonight "