[I'm back. You may have thought I quit- I didn't. Just had a really busy weekend.]

If this actually works I may just kill myself.

Doesn’t that defeat the purpose?

Did I ever tell you? My special skill is making false things true.

What does that even mean?

I don’t know, shut up.

Bang!

“The corpse is gone, are you sure it was dead?”

“Most definitely.”

“Did it have any signs of being a special variant?”

“None at all, it was a basic strength variant.”

“Check the hold for any signs of the cause.”

“Yes sir.”

Thump. Thump. Thump. The sound of boots hitting the floor slowly approached me. Please don’t check for a pulse!

I think… these guys are probably professionals.

So what now?

Diplomacy.

“Hello there, contrary to my app-”

“Freeze! Hands in the air now!”

He’s from the government for sure.

“I think, I’ll just peacefully lay here with no sudden movements.”

“Turn around!”

“Like- face down?”

I spun over and for lack of a better way to describe it I was now grinding against the floor.

“What do we do captain?”

“Was he dead when you found him?”

“Yes sir.”

“Kill it.”

Fuck.

My body jerked to the side and grabbed the mangled body of the other victim while holding it towards the soldiers as a shield.

“Can we not do this? I’m a reasonable person.”

“Hold! Convince me.”

It’s going to be hard, he looks like a tough nut to crack. Like a literal nut made of titanium.

“Uhh, I’m human? What do you want me to say? Oh no! I’ve been possessed by a mind control monster! Like honestly, what kind of answer would even satisfy you?”

“Leave it be.”

“Yes, leave me alone. Great choice!”

“How did you survive?”

“My sheer indomitable will and unconquerable desire to not die.”

“Your unconquerable desire to not die?”

“That’s what I said.”

“Let headquarters know we have a special variant on our hands. A sane one.”

“I am pretty special I guess, all my teachers s-”

“Follow me.”

“Yes sir!”

This place totally looks like some underground base.

That is more likely than not the case.

Look at all those soldiers, their gear doesn’t even look like it’s supposed to exist yet!

You’re right. They look way too advanced to be normal soldiers.

This must be where all the uncounted tax dollars are going. Maybe this is Area fifty-one.

What’s that?

You uncultured swine, of course you would never know about that.

Did you mean area sixty-one?

Huh, that’s interesting. Very interesting.

Where do you think they are taking us?

Our main concern should be why they are letting us see everything, it either means we won’t get out to tell people or they have some other way to control us.

Not like there’s anything we can do. We’re in the lion's den now.

You’re right. Let’s wait for luck to give us an opportunity. This is a pretty cool elevator though.

We’re going down though.

I know I know, harder to escape and blah blah blah.

The elevator doors opened and we were met with an entourage of people.

Dude! It’s a fucking woman! The main commander is a woman! Do you understand how little sense this makes?! It’s the same as if an anime became real life! Realistically it should be a guy!

Stop making so much noise! It’s just a woman.

No the fuck it’s not. It’s like she was placed in this specific position by the hand of god or something. The possibility of a secret organization that handles monsters is already pretty low, the chances of a woman running that operation is infinitely lower. That’s shitty light novel level type plot.

“You seem to be very engrossed in the fact that I am a woman.”

She can fucking hear me? I hate mind readers, so annoying to deal with. Speaking of which, I wonder what happened to Log. Porn! Dog sex! Dragon fucking a car! Man with face peeled off!

What are you doing?

Mental defense.

“It is a good attempt. But it doesn’t work.”

So condescending. I might eat you someday, but on second thought- you look very good so I’ll spare you.

Ah fuck! My head hurts!

Really? Mine doesn’t.

My fucking brain is being squished!

No it’s not, your brain is perfectly fine.

“You’re immune?”

“I am, he’s not I guess.”

“How very interesting.”

“Hey, don’t copy me. It’s cringe. What am I here for anyways? If I’m here to join some kind of special hunting squad let’s speed it up, I’d  rather not sit around wasting time.”

“So you already know.”

“Of course I do. Look at the bunch of misfits behind you, it’s clear to see they’re a little superhero squad. Props for their stoicism, they maintain pretty good straight faces.”

“They will be your new teammates.”

“Wow, so no convincing me to join or forget about my past life? We’re just going with- I already accepted the deal?”

“You’re smart enough to figure things out.”

“Gee thanks. I didn’t know that. I have one request though, take care of my family. Please? I would give you puppy eyes but I never learned how to do it.”

“We will do our best to maintain your physical and mental state at the most optimal levels.”

“I sure do love promises from the military, so clear and straightforward, no hidden meanings at all.”

“Your training will begin shortly. Follow them.”

“Oh yeah, can you let my buddy go now? He’s still suffering, you know?”

You fucker! You couldn’t have done that from the start?

Pain is weakness leaving the body.

My ass!

Whatever, it’s time for us to train. I wonder what their regimen is like.

…

I mean. It’s- it’s not bad, but it looks so plain and generic.  Exactly what I thought it would be. Why’s he walking over?

“So what’s your ability?”

“That’s a really good question. I don’t even know how I got in without a screening.”

“Show me what you got then.”

“You aren’t someone I’m supposed to hurt or kill, you know? Teammates and everything.”

“It’s fine, I specialize in defense. I’m everybody's first training partner.”

“Sounds more like you’re a living sand bag, kind of unfair to you to be honest.”

“Just hit me.”

“Ok boss.”

He was suddenly wrapped in a skin colored rock like material and posted up in a defensive stance. My body sent a light jab his way and stopped.

“So what can you tell?”

“You… hit me again.”

“Do you want me to beat you up or something?”

“Yes, do that.”

In the next moment we were flying forward in a rush of punches, kicks, elbows, and knees.

He’s fucking tough. Maybe a grapple.

So far no damage had been done to our training partner. In the middle of one of the hooks we slipped past and quickly wrapped our arms around his neck. Unfortunately we weren’t able to get a good choke in either.

His neck isn’t even compressible! This is fucked!.. Maybe we should eat him. This might work though.

I bent over and got a good grip on his ankle then yanked it. Surprisingly, his foot actually got yanked out from beneath him and I was able to get some strong momentum going. It wasn’t just strong momentum, it was inhumanly strong momentum- I was practically tossing a whole person.

Haha! It fucking worked! Now, to fuck his shit up.

Instead of tossing him we used the momentum to start spinning him and pretty quickly we were spinning at speeds that were making me extremely queasy.

If only we had water. I figured it out, his defense is strong but he’s weak. Maybe I can just press him against the ground or something.

He’s a training partner, remember- not a victim for you to kill.

You’re right, I almost forgot.

Our spinning slowly stopped and we gently placed him on the floor.

“You ok buddy?”

“...”

He’s fucking leaking bro! Maybe we fucked up his organs?

That’s puke. It’s definitely puke.

Uhh. Sick, let’s get away.

“Where are you going?”

“I have no idea, I don’t even know where I am.”

“I’m your next training partner.”

“Do you want me to hit you too?”

“If you can.”

Once again, light jab. Except he turned into a fucking blur?

It’s speed, his power is speed. Now I know what it feels like.

“You’re too difficult for me to deal with right now. I think I’ll just go sit over there and relax.”

“You are not allowed to leave until you’ve trained with everyone.”

“Then I just won’t leave then. See ya.”

Whiz!

I hadn’t even registered what that noise was when I felt a sting on my body and the intense impact that followed.

Fuck, that hurts. I thought he would be weak, I forgot about the speed times mass bullshit.

Then remember it.

I will.

“Ouch. That stings, welp, you can continue doing that. I’ll just sit in my corner.”

What are you doing?

Whiz!

Just watch.

Whiz!

He’s still hitting us, you know.

Whiz!

I do know, just be patient.

Whiz!

Whiz!

Whiz!

It’s starting to feel less like flesh damage and more like permanent damage.

It’s fucking fine, we’ll recover.

So now what? We’re in the corner. We began throwing jabs with both arms in perfectly straight lines. Was this really the master plan?

You’re a fucking idiot.

As the blur weaved side to side through our jabs one of my fists that had just flown past his head unballed itself and came back while hooking onto his hair.

Can’t believe that worked.

And- now his spine was in my mouth. Isn’t this a bad idea? Like we are right in the middle of their base.

Who fucking cares? We’ll just eat all of them if we have to.

“Stop!”

“What are you doing!”

All of them were rushing forward or launching attacks my way but the moment my teeth sank in and his blood trickled down my throat everything changed.

Finally, I’m back to hyperspeed. I missed this. Guess we don’t need to kill everyone here.

I tossed the man towards the incoming attacks and slowly took a seat back on the ground. Why was I sitting so slowly?

The reason I’m here with you is because too many beings knew what I was capable of. We aren’t repeating that mistake. I’ll figure out how to turn the speed off in a moment.

…

Got it.

Everything resumed to normal speed and the chaos slightly dampened once they realized he was fine.

“Don’t worry guys, I know my limits. I was just making it clear which of us is better.”

“Try not to harm your own teammates.”

“Sure. Can I go home?”

“You can go after we place a tracking device on you and a briefing of our operations.”

“I have a question though. Why do you trust me to do good?”

“Because if you don’t you will be wiped from existence.”

“That’s reasonable. How long has this place been established?”

“You’ll learn that eventually.”

“If that tracking device is anywhere near my spine or head, I’ll kill as many of you as I can before dying.”

“It will simply be placed on your wrist then.”

“That’s a great idea, more people should do that.”

…

That’s it? That’s all they want me to do?

What do you mean that’s it? For the rest of our lives we are going to be fighting those monsters.

That’s the best thing that could have possibly happened for us. Look at this watch- it’s so fucking cool.

Are you not worried about the fact that our world is being invaded by manifestations?

It’s an opportunity for evolution. We just have to make sure we do a really fucking good job of keeping people safe.

So what? Now we just go home and wait for the signal to go catch a monster?

I guess we can also play with the money we got from Ms. Lickwell.

Lime- nevermind. Do you even know what to do with it?

Of course I do. I’m the fucking main character. Or, we could go pay a visit to Eva.

Let’s not do that.

We should definitely do that.

‘Hey Eva, I have something cool to show you. Where are you right now?’

Do you really think she’s going to tell you?

She’s going to see me again at school anyways.

What are you going to show- no way right?! No fucking way you show her that.

I’m definitely showing that to her.

You fuckwad! How far will you go to humiliate me!

As far as I want. What are you gonna do? Cry?

Do you have no shame?

No I don’t-

Buzz!

Wow, she really just sent her location. I wonder if we should just run there… probably not, this thing is definitely monitoring us. That does leave us with one small problem though, how are we going to get there? Why didn’t they just drop us off at home? Whatever, let’s just call a taxi.

…

Hmmm. This is her house? It’s even better than ours.

The reason no ones done shit to her even though she’s an annoying brat is because her parents are stupid rich.

She’s not as rich as my old girlfriend though.

I’m starting to think that you aren’t from this world.

You’re starting to think well then.

‘I’m here. Want me to crawl through a window or something?’

What kind of suggestion is that?

My old girlfriend would have wanted me to do that, me and her parents weren’t exactly on agreeable terms. Oop- I forgot about her mom, me and her mom were on very agreeable terms.

Do you have a fetish for moms or something?

I have a fetish for powerful women.

Not as bad as I expected I guess.

A game with no challenge isn’t fun.

“Hey Vaun!”

This feels familiar.

“What’s up Eva? It’s been quite a long time since I’ve seen you.”

“You saw me this morning.”

“Really, I didn’t know.”

“Whatever, what have you got to show me? I’m not interested in watching you kill more people.”

“Holy shit, is my reputation that bad?”

“You tried to choke me to death.”

“I did, can’t even lie. But that’s in the past, I’m reformed now. Let’s go inside, you’ll like what I’ve got.”

“Just so you know, we have guards inside so don’t try anything crazy.”

“Yes boss! I’ll be your obedient little dog today.”

“You’re making me sick. Let’s go.”

What the fuck? An obedient little dog? Are you sure you’re still the same person?

No, I'm not sure.

Wow, they really do have guards.

These one’s don’t look very amazing though. The one’s I knew were all stone cold killers.

How can you tell?

The other ones tried to kill me.

I should’ve expected that.

I did nothing wrong.

I’m not even going to argue with you.

I swear, I’m good boy.

Now this is just going too far. My brain might melt from all this nonsense you are spewing out.

Whatever then, I’ll just show her the video.

Don’t you fucking dare!

Doesn’t this kinda look like a bedroom?

“Hey, are you sure I can go into your bedroom?”

“I take care of my business.”

“Uh, cool I guess.”

“What did you want to show me?”

“Look at this.”

He was really- god damn it! It’s my own fucking body! Why can’t I move it!?

“Are you going to show me or not?”

“Well, I’m trying but your friend isn’t letting me.”

“It’s you?”

“No it’s Jesus Christ himself- for I have descended.”

“What did you manage to get your hands on this time? I don’t want to be an accomplice to murder.”

“First of all, you already are. And second, this isn’t a murder.”

“...”

“...Can you help pry my hand off?”

Not if I can do anything about it!

Let’s see just how strong you are then.

Now I could feel an intense fatigue building in the arm I was using to cover the screen, an abnormal fatigue.

This actually feels like an efficient way to train our body. Remember this feeling, we’re going to be doing this a lot in the future.

I was losing strength. Now it was simply a matter of when.

Don’t give up so easily! I believe in you!

That would be more motivational if you weren’t the one doing this to me.

Motivation is Motivation! Whether you like who it comes from or not.

I’d like to imagine the reality where we become a motivational speaker.

No, let’s not. There’s a reason teachers show those to us- and it’s most likely to just waste time so they don’t have to do any work.

Please, I’m begging you. Don’t show her that video.

Are you fucking stupid? You think I would really show her something that without a doubt would disgust her? Your future woman? Your lack of faith in me is somewhat hurtful.

No reasonable person could have faith in you.

You make a very reasonable point. Have a little faith though, I’m not as unreasonable as you think. I just do things in a very particular way, you’ll understand sooner or later.

“There we go, I’ve finally got control again. Now look at these goodies.”

The naked pictures of Ms. Limewell flashed on the screen of my phone and I knew right then and there that I had been wrong to trust him.

“How did you get these?”

“It’s a trade secret, do you want them?”

“No! Why would I?”

“I don’t know, maybe for leverage or power or something.”

“I already have all of that. This is just going to get me in trouble.”

“If that’s the case why have you been spreading rumors and videos of my buddy?”

“Because it's fun.”

Did you hear that? Your entire reputation got destroyed because- it’s fun. Do you get it yet? Please tell me you understand by now.

Be quiet.

Ooh, scary.

“Did you know I was being bullied?”

“Everyone did.”

“And that was fun for you?”

“Well…”

“What if I had died? Why were you even there that night? Was it to record my suicide?”

“I can explain.”

“Really? Then go ahead.”

“It’s because I wanted to see if you could change.”

“Change? How?”

“I thought that maybe you would get tougher.”

“So I was supposed to be your little dog in the fighting cage?”

Little dog.

“It wasn’t like that.”

“What was it like then?”

“I wanted you to grow the balls to ask me out!”

See! I fucking told you! I fucking told you so!