“Three days till the boat arrives in port.” Vern remarked reclining on my bed, wearing his pajamas still. We had been up for the last few hours in my room chatting amongst ourselves. Not like we had much to do until departure.

“We have a pier in the capital?” I ask, I was pretty sure we were a mile or two or seven from the sea.

“Eh, well there’s a giant canal or whatever that connects to the sea. Locals call it the Capital Port.”

“Oh.” I sip some of the coffee Vern had brought over up the lobby's bar. It burned as it fell down my throat.

We had been in the capital for the last eight days, waiting for the ship to the island to arrive. In that time Vern had stopped being an ass to me and Hayli whenever he saw us together, mostly due to Sairah scaring him into it. I hadn’t minded it, I was used to it as the youngest brother, but Sairah disliked him teasing her disciple. So, she held him out from a second story window by his legs and threatened to let him drop. (Why would you let her do that? - Vern) (Because.)

“Anyway, how are you and the lizard doing?”

“Water Dragon, and pretty great really.”

“You annoy her into hating you yet?” He makes a gesture.

“You get a date with someone yet?” I fire back.

“I could at any time with anyone. I have tons of admirers. Tons."

“No, you don't. I screen your letters. They're mostly from the Duchess and hers. Really though, only a psycho would be interested in you.”

“What are you trying to say?”

“You attract crazy people. I mean look at the Duchess. Obsessive.”

“Duchess Nathers isn’t crazy.”

“Would you take her offer up?” I ask.

“N-No.”

“Exactly.”

He stretched, “What about Fredericka?”

From behind me a reply came, “I’m not crazy!”

The female guard had broken into Vern’s room to watch him sleep, he woke up and saw her. After hearing him tell the tale of the “monstrous freak” that was watching him sleep, I confessed it was her and after confronting her in a café she was basically paying for everything to avoid Vern reporting her for stalking. She had tried to say she was just watching him to keep him safe but Vern pointed out that he was capable of protecting himself and also it was my job to protect him as his Shield.

“Normal people don’t stalk other people.” Vern said.

“Yeah, Ricka get some help, you’re too mental even for this cretin.”

“I’m mental? You’re besties with a girl you knew for twenty-four hours before she asked you to be friends which, by the way, is weird to do, Earth.” I like hearing my name, it’s nice. Also, weird coming from her. Makes me nervous.

“Both of you are off. Besides, Earth is the least weird one here. Only creeps break into people’s rooms to watch them sleep.” Vern interjected.

“But my sister did that to her wife. She thought it was sweet."

“Oh, so it's genetic then.” I comment followed by Fredericka locking me in a chokehold. After letting her nearly suffocate me, Vern separates us.

“I don’t need my Shields fighting.”

“Shield and Stalker.” I say.

“I’m as much as Shield as you are.” She was right, actually.

“Stalkers are less Shields and more Berserker, going forward and killing things in front of their master. Especially crazy obsessed ones like yourself.”

“I’m not crazy! Besides I’m not that obsessed with Vern.” She lied.

“Really now?” Vern asks, face drawn in an inquisitive position.

“I really just want to be a knight that will save a hero in his time of need making him fall in love with me. Vern just happens to be the only male hero I know.”

“Wow, that’s sad Ricka.”

“Hey, everyone dreams of fulfilling their childhood fantasies. It’s noble. You and I should hurry up and conquer the moon.” He joked.

“Nah, too far away. Besides, who knows if the grey circle has people to conquer?”

“I hate both of you. At least my dream is possible.”

“Yes, if I get brain damage. Unfortunately for you, I wear a helm in battle.” Vern said shaking his head.

“You are both asses.” Fredericka huffed.

“You just noticed that?” I ask.

“Ugh. Why do I hang out with you two?”

Vern answered, "Who else are you going to hang out with. Everyone else our age is terrified of you. And you hate everyone besides us, and even that seems questionable.”

“Sorry.” She rolls her eyes, sarcastic venom dripping from her words. Best to stop.

Vern walks back over to his room and reappears a few minutes later fully dressed, signaling for us to get up and actually leave the hotel for the first time since yesterday. I pull on my pants and Fredericka tosses her chest plate on over her head then we depart.

“Exactly why does the bonding exercise have to take place on an island?” I ask.

“They had a base already there and I guess they want it to be isolated from civilization or something.”

“It seems stupid to think cramming seven different people with different views, beliefs, and so on into a single island would create anything but chaos. I mean first time we went camping together you two nearly got me to commit a triple homicide.” Fredericka says.

“I think they'll be more mature than us. Also, it's fifteen people not seven. Unless some other Hero brings more people like I have.”

“That’s worse, Vern.” I comment.

“Yeah, but there is a house for Hero’s like me and then one for you guys.”

“Ugh. I have to be stuck with him?” Fredericka points at me.

“Rude.”

“Yeah, Fredericka, be nice to him. His wife and him have to be separated.” He grinned. 

"I think you mispoke. You're the one who won't be with his wife.” I complain slugging my fist into Vern’s shoulder.

“Aw, he’s getting upset.” Vern mocked me hitting me back. Then he smiled evilly. “You could probably stay in the big house. In fact, both of you idiots could stay with the big boys in the big house if the both of you agree to be our butler and maid.”

“I’m not wearing a butler/maid outfit!” Fredericka and I yelled in unison.

“Tsk. Well, not like I would trust you to clean or cook or anything or anyways.”

“Oh, yeah. Earth, can you ask if Hayli wants to join you and us at the theater.” Asked Fredericka.

“ I... what are you planning. I do not trust either of you around anyone I befriend. Especially you. You'll get Sairah to beat us to death."

“Actually, while you were busy with your new little humon friend, I won four tickets to the Lichner Theater to see ‘Last Week I Dreamt of War’ by Alphonse Alfred, for tomorrow night.”

“Four tickets.” I state, not really asking a question. Did Fredericka even like plays? 

“I’m being forced to go too.” Vern sighed.

“It’s like a double date!” Fredericka bubbled with excitement. I already knew Vern’s response. He wasn’t into her.

“I’m not dating you."

Yep.

“Liking someone has nothing to do with dating someone. The upper class dates people all the time for like, status and stuff. Think of it as a status date. Also friends go on dates all the time.”

“I’m the only one here with status!” He yelled back in her face. Some spittle flew out as he did so. "Also what friends do you have besides us?"

I wanted to hurry and end this topic. “Well, Ricka, I guess I can ask her. I think we’re meeting at LDC for dinner tonight.” It was either that or at the park over by Charles Street. I may have gotten a bit too much to drink when making the plans, thanks to a certain bear humon.

Vern groaned, “You spend way too much time with her, little brother.”

“Sorry Vern, she's just way more interesting than you. Besides if I'm writing your own story, I need to learn about the other Heroes, right.”

“Oh, I’m not sure staying overnight at the castle's guest house is learning.” Vern replied.

Fredericka smirked, “Oh, I am sure he ‘learned’ quite a lot.”

I made an incredulous and disgusted face at her, “I hate both of you. Unlike you I can be in the room with a friend without being a creep or a criminal.”

“Oh, come on Earth, you're being too defensive. Almost like you actually do like her.”

“Yeah, Dirty Earth. Wait, does that mean he doesn't like us?”

“She's more bearable to listen to than either of you clowns.”

“Ouch, I am so hurt. I am at least a jester.” Vern asked, doing a little dance.

“A jester is funny. A clown is just a creepy, sad little creature.”

“So, like you.” Fredericka chimed in.

"Look in a mirror, red nose." I reply rolling my eyes.

“I think clowns are funny. Dad worked as one at our parties.” Vern cracks his neck as we continue on.

“Yeah but dad was funny in despite of himself.” I reply back.

“Why are we talking about this?” Fredericka asked bluntly.

"We just wanted to talk about stuff you know about.

Vern stopped Fredericka from answering back, then spoke himself as we pulled back up to the hotel, “Well, have fun with Hayli. Also, don't forget to ask- I don't want her to beat me."

I smirked. “I don't know, I might forget."

He shook his head and we departed back up to our rooms, me to clean the sweat off me before dinner and Vern to fall asleep. Fredericka I assumed would go and stand guard outside Vern’s room. I had made sure to tell Vern to prop a chair under the handle as an extra measure.

After that, I begin my walk to where I hoped Hayli would be- the LDC. She was standing outside the door as I approached. Noticing me, she ran over beaming as usual. The owner of the restaurant let out an audible groan as we walked through the door, obvious sick of us making off with his money due to the king’s decree. Feeling bad for him I gave him a few coins that I had stolen from Fredericka. He still seemed oddly upset.

“Why do we keep eating here?” I somewhat complain.

“Probably because we get to eat free, why else?” Hayli answered taking a seat.

I suppose I should ask now before we started asking questions. Hayli was insatiably curious about things, probably due to her being from a town that really didn't get many outsiders. In order to placate her I had convinced her into a sort of game where we took turns. “Hey, Hayli. You are free tomorrow night? Right?”

“Bestie, we spend every night hanging out, of course I’m free. Why are you asking though?” She leaned closer to me, disregarding a basic rule of etiquette and placing her elbows on the table.

“My brother and Ricka won two pairs of tickets to see that Alphonse Alfred play, ‘Last Wednesday I Dreamt of Peace.”

“Of course. I love plays.” She emphasized the word “love’ heavily as she replied.

“You do?”

“Oh, yeah.” She replied, “My mother is an actress of sorts. I spent a lot of time in our town theater watching her shows growing up. I love that play in particular. I think you’ll relate to it as well.” 

I glance at the waiter coming our way with our usual appetizer. We had been here enough to not have to order it anymore. I wasn’t sure if I was proud of that fact or not. 

“Well then, since our appetizer is here,” I point to the fried eitre balls, a regional specialty of the capital with a tomato and peppers-based sauce drizzled on top to make it one silver coin more expensive. It was also because Vern had suggested it to the head chef after I had mentioned how mom used to make us eitre and mix it with tomato soup. So, for once in his life he attributed to a food and didn’t ruin it. I even drew an award for him and stapled it to his door. He had bought a frame for it and put it in his trunk.

“I suppose you want to start the inquistion?” She asked.

“Of course.” I watched as she bit into a ball, before realizing it was still too hot and putting it back while fanning her face desperately. “I guess I’ll start then.”

“Go ahead. Just need a minute” She managed before chugging down water.

“When exactly- no, how old were you when you found out you were a hero?” I begin off easy, curious if the oracles found her fate before or after... well, the incident my brother and I caused at a party.

Finally cooled down she answered, “Like sixty some moon cycles, I think. Now it’s my turn. Um… Do you have any pets?”

“Me personally, no. Callie has a few pets though, all without permission. A cat and two dogs. Though, I guess we could count the horse Duchess Nathers gave us,” (That we left in a stable. I wonder if they’re okay.) (I think they should be returned to Nathers, they did have her seal on the saddle.- Vern) “Or those birds that stay near our windows because Vern and I feed them could count. Anyways, your turn. What is your last name?” I needed that for the book. People had last names, and what if another Hayli came along.

She laughed as I took a bit of the eitre balls, careful to blow on it. “My deities, we really haven’t done that yet have we. Well, I am Hayli Summer. Now, Earth Thornell, it is my turn.” She thought about it, “What is your biggest fear?”

I answer immediately, “Drowning. Or just big bodies of water in general, since I can’t swim. By the way expect me to cower below deck in fear from falling off while we are on the boat.”

“Really, you can’t swim?” She asks, tilting her head.

“I’m sorry for growing up land locked unlike you.”

“I really had wanted to do the Harvest Festival Swim of the Hill Valley Festival with you, but I guess we can’t.”

“Why does swimming have to do with a harvest?”

“Is that your question?”

I shrug, “Sure.”

“I have no clue.” She answers.

“That’s not even an answer.” I complain, glaring at her.

“We never agreed that we had to have a concrete answer.” She gave me an innocent look.

“I guess so.” I conceded.

“Now, what question were we on?”

“Um, Six.” I guess, having lost count way too easily. Not that I was trying to keep track.

“Yeah, six seems good,” she agreed. “Now, when… is your birthday?”

“Third day of Leci.” I replied.

“Leci?” She looks at me confused.

“Oh, right. You go by the Cycles right. It would be the Sixth Cycle.” I clarify for her.

“Okay. Thank you.”

“Good. Now it’s my turn and this time you better have an answer.” I watch her nod her head while rolling her eyes. I continue, “Why do you want to be a priestess?”

“Because I wish to do good for the world and being a priestess would allow a commoner like myself the most influence. Plus, if I get to the higher tiers before Sairah, I can boss her around” She looked overly happy about the last line, nearly bubbling as she pictured it in her head.

I stuff some more food in my mouth as the real meal approaches. The waiter sighs as he places down the whole grilled chicken on a bed of lettuce and leaves us alone again. Hayli and I both break off a wing and place it on our plates. I lightly pepper and heavily salt mine while Hayli goes at it raw.

“So, Hayli why-” I try to take another turn while she is distracted.

“Wait your turn.” She chastises me, mouth full of chicken and bone.

“Fine.” I roll my eyes at her.

She grins, showing her sharp teeth to me. My brain wants them to bite me. I am worried about my brain's de.sires

“Hmmm. What is your view on the Seven Heroes?”

“Read the book.” I reply forgetting that only the duo of idiots how kept using my room to hang out in the morning were the ones that knew about it.

“Huh? Um. W-What book.”

“Uh. The one Vern is making me write about this whole thing.”

“Oh, so is this in the book?”

“Will be.”

“What about last night. When Bianca was... you know."

“No. Among other things I really don’t want zealots to kill me for… you know.”

“Yeah, that would be smart. High Mother Bianca has some creepily loyal fans.”

I laugh, “Yeah. I’ve heard.”

“So, then I’ll know all I need to know about you if I read this book, right?”

“I’m likely to be stuck with you the entire time anyways, so what’s the point?” I ask her, peeling the meat off my chicken bones.

“Oh, come on Earthy, I’m sure you just have some secrets you want to hide from me.” She licked her lips and stared at me, like she was trying to make me answer her question.

“Why do you care?” I reply back before leaning back and looking up at the ceiling.

“I just do. Besides, I like talking to you. It's fun seeing someone blush at my teasing for once.”

“Oh, weird. Last I checked, the red one here is you.” I smile and lean towards her.

"My, my. Someone might get the wrong idea with you leaning in like that." She flicked my forehead.

I pull away and try not to look at her, "Sorry."

“See, blushing like a bride.”

“Shut up.” I move back from her personal space a bit more, since at this point I was feeling way too self concious.

“Fine.” She shrugs, then moves her tail underneath her chin. “I think we reached the end of Hayli’s Ten Questions.”

“Pretty sure we passed ten questions a while ago.”

She sighed. “And the chicken is gone.”

“Well then, let’s take a walk back to my hotel. We should take the long way.” I smile at her. "I want Vern to worry about me."

(Is that why I had to talk to Fredericka for four hours?- Vern)

Hayli dropped me of at the front of the hotel, hugging me goodbye. She held on long enough to earn us a few glance and snickers from passersby.

“See ya tomorrow bestie!” Hayli yelled walking away.

“Later!” I waved to her as she departed then turned around and retreated up the stairs to my hotel room.

Fredericka lay spread eagle on her bed, formerly my bed, as I entered our room. I sat down on the inferior bed that wasn’t the one furthest from the door and sighed. I had been forced to keep Fredericka in my room to keep her from “messing’ with Vern. It was hell, as she snored like a waterfall, wasted the hot water and stole all my pillows.

“Hey, Earth.” She greeted me.

“Mmmhmm.” I mumbled not really paying my roommate much heed.

“So, how was the date?”

“First, we had a conversation about this already. Today even. And second, if it was, why would I tell you? Don't want to give you any good ideas.” A pillow flies and smacks me in the face. I put it down on my bed having finally accrued a pillow again.

“Can it.”

I slam onto the bed and let out a hard groan. I was exhausted, my face felt hot, and my bod was sore.

“You did ask her, right Earth?” She asks as I scoot up onto my pillow.

“About that play, ‘Last Night I Dreamt of Pasta’ or whatever? Yeah.” I turn to face Fredericka who was now sitting up watching me.

“And?”

“She said sure.”

“That’s good.” She says as her lips twitch upward for a brief second.

“Exactly what time is this play?”

“Six-ish, I suppose,” She stood up and scowled at me. “I’m gonna take a bath now. Don’t peek.”

“Peek at what? Did you get a tattoo or something? In an embarrassing spot?"

She rolled her eyes at me and disappeared into the bathroom. 

A while later, a dripping wet Fredericka wrapped in a towel emerged from the bathroom. She pointed over her shoulder, “I’m getting dressed, go hide in the bathroom.”

“Fine, fine.” I say walking into the bathroom.

“I left you the water since I know your weak ass can’t stand a cold bath.”

Ugh, gross. But, a warm bath full of Fredericka Germs was miles better than a cold one. I close the door, get undressed and slide into the warm water and relaxed.

The water was slightly murk, and some black hair strands floated by. I fumbled about without looking for the bar of soap and lather up. After a few eighth hours soaking in the tub, I drained the tub and wrapped a towel around my form.

Fredericka was busy writing in my book journal when I emerged. Noticing me she quickly finished up and slammed it shut. I eyed her and sighed. Vern had a companion in his note writing apparently. I pull my pajamas on quickly, managing to not take my towel off during the entire process.

“Night, Ricka.” I said sliding under my covers.

“Yeah, yeah,” she said blowing out the candlelight. “Night, Earth.”

I closed my eyes and began to relax. Then Fredericka added, “Um. Thanks for coming tomorrow. I’d be awkward around Vern if you weren’t there. Guess hating you balances out my Vern obsession.”

“Uh.” I respond not really feeling like talking.

(The next few sentence of hers were muffled by my placing the pillow over my heads and the fact I was more focused on sleep. I have to the best of my ability, and because Fredericka is a dick, without help. At least syllabically it is right, or at least that’s what a grunt of approval from Fredericka told me. Besides that, it is gibberish I wrote down because I am lazy and unreliable.) (That’s for sure- Vern)

“Earth, vern do be oil like.”

“Yes, whatever.” Deities, let me sleep.

“Oh, well. Then do yarns. It is unabashedly a river. Cover urn?”

“I...” I trail of begin to doze off.

“She what light, goodnight? He hates me?”

“Go to bed! Deities!” I threw my only pillow at her. She shut up after that and proceeded to snore loudly. I was pretty sure she was trying to vent about Vern more. Seriously, I'd rather room with Vern and he loves to sing when he wakes up- and his singing is awful.

It wasn’t better.

(That is at least better than half of the pages I’ve found in the trash. I can’t believe you’d cut out the speech I made at the inn. Even if you made it a ramble about cats and rocks as soon as I used them in a metaphor.-Vern.) (I like this better than what I actually said… I’d have killed to keep my half-awake mumblings away from the pagea and away from Vern. - Fredericka)

The next evening I arrived in really thin fabric shirt and slacks that Hayli and Sairah had basically shoved on me after showing up in my normal attire. It wasn't that nicer looking. The shirt was comfy, thought i didn't get why the tie was attached. I stared at my hair, still unsure of the style Sairah had brushed it into. It was… nice but it looked a bit feminine- and I really didn’t want Vern to have more ammo. I held the hand of Hayli, who was dressed up like a princess or something. Her hair was in a bun, kept taught with a hairpiece borrowed from the High Mother, long, elbow length peach-colored fingerless gloves covered her hand and arms kept together by a ring on each middle finger. Her dress was shining, with pinkish lace shoulders and a tight bottom that barely fell to the floor. I was pretty sure it was beyond the pay even Hero’s make in a year. She must have saved for a bit for it. Her face was covered in makeup, most noticeably a light pink lipstick on her lips. And her slight skewed eyeliner and mascara that Sairah had tried to do while the dress was being tightened. 

I pulled at my tie, it was way too tight. Hayli chastised me as I let it slack a little. Apparently looking good at a play is important or something. Not like the actors would be able to see us.

“Wow, you two look nice. Even you, Earth. Shirt's a bit long.” Complemented Fredericka as we approached. She was in a nightgown-like red dress, with nothing else out of the ordinary. She probably had brought guard clothing mostly. “I mean good compared to my date that is.”

“I’m not your date.” Complained a red faced Vern. He wore a black suit jacket wide open with his tie somehow tied so wrong that we had to cut it off him later that night.

“The jacket is fine, it fits your lazy style. The tie though...” I chastise him.

“Learning to tie a tie is not something I need to worry about while I’m kicking demon butt.”

“And after you kick all the butts? What are you going to wear to all the feasts, balls, galas, and parades they will hold for you?” I ask.

“I’ll show up in full armor and make sure my sword keeps people from asking.” He mimes stabbing people with a sword. I laugh and shake my head. 

Behind us Hayli and Fredericka were engaged in a conversation.

“Oy. So, this is Dirt’s lizard wife.”

“Sh- His name is Earth. And we aren't dating. I don't even like guys.”

“Hmm. You’re a lot cuter than I thought you’d be. Kinda assumed you’d be nowhere close to what Earth described you as. Besides I always assume only hideous demons would be his other friends.”

“You’re even ruder than Earth described you."

“Thank you.”

I look over at Vern again who shrugged. I sighed; this was going to be a great time.

The placard in front of the theater read in large metal letters, Exclusive: Grand Revival of “Last Hour I Dreamt of Happiness”. The font made my eyes bleed. Hayli and Fredericka continued to chat as we went forward into the large open doors.

After entering inside the usher took our tickets and ushered us to our seats. We had been placed in a box that was so far away that the people setting up the stage looked like little dolls.

“How the hell are we suppose ta see the play?” Whined Fredericka sitting down in one of the two chairs close to the stage.

Vern sat down in the chair next to his date Frederica. Hayli and I sat down on a short bench next to the back of the box. Hayli leaned on me and smiled, “That Frederica girl is rude.”

I chuckled, “That’s Ricka for you.”

“Why do you hang out with her?”

“She's fun to mess with. Plus, she was only kid our age that could stand the two of us.”

“Oh.” She scooted her body even closer to mine like she was using me like a prop to hold her up. “So, you think you'll enjoy the play? I think the main female is someone you'd like.”

I respond, “I’m here so Vern and Fredericka don’t cause a scene so, I don’t think I’ll have time for a play.”

Hayli sighed and looked disappointed, “Right, of course. I wish you'd hurry up and figure yourself out so you could be even more fun to hang with."

“Um. Yeah.” I replied trying to figure out her disappointed expression. 

“Fine, fine.” She sat up. “I’m going to get drinks. You can stay here. Watch the play. It was my mom's favorite.” She got up and left leaving me alone on the bench. I lay down on it.

A voice yelled from ahead and below. The once loud audience quieted.

“Ladies, gentlemen, neither and either; welcome to the first new showing of A.A.’s masterpiece ‘Last Night I Slept for Fire.’ Now enjoy our pit orchestra preform the main theme while our actresses and actors finish readying themselves.”

The band struck up and the crowd resumed.

“So, are you enjoying this?” Asked Fredericka to Vern.

“I can’t say if we haven’t seen what we came here for yet!” Vern escalated his voice until he was yelling at the end.

“Vern, she’s talking about your date.”

“This is not a date.”

“Sure, lover boy.” I roll my eyes at him.

“Speaking of dates, where’s your cute lizard?” Asked Fredericka.

“Getting drinks.” I say. "And it's not a date. It could never be a date."

“You think she can carry them all.” Asked Vern.

“She told me to stay.”

“Oh, now you'll listen to someone who tells you not to go somewhere. Truly you have started to mature.” Jeered Fredericka.

“Look four drinks is too much for her. Go help. ” Vern commanded me.

“Ugh, fine.” I stand up. “Which way?”

“Left.” They say in eerily perfect unison.

I turn stage right and walk past the talking socialites and ushers into the “bar”.

“Hey, snake, let me eat you up.” Said the male Eagle sitting at the bar in to his Snake companion.

“Ssssshut it, sssssstupid.” They responded.

“Hey, chucklenuts here are your drinks.” Announced the bartender slams two glasses filled with a weird green liquid onto the counter. “That’ll be forty coins.”

“Forty? That’s highway robbery.”

“They’re usually ten but I really don’t like you two. Bothering all my customers. Not everyone that comes in here wants to sleep with you dolts. It's not worth it, now is it?"

I glanced over the bar and spotted Hayli in a corner the glasses on a table in front of her. I walk over and pick up two of them.

She frowned at me, “I told you to wait.”

“And you expected me to stay? Besides you seem like you need help. Either that or you forgot where our balcony was.”

“What part of watch the play did you not get? I could have gotten them by myself while all of you got some culture. Now gimme."

“No!” I called back walking with the two glasses in my hands.

Cheeks puffed out, Hayli walked briskly to catch up cups in each hand. “Let me carry them.” She demanded.

“You’re acting like a kid.” I laugh.

“No you are.” She responded.

I stopped and turned to Hayli, “Why are you mad with me?”

Below us the play was in the prologue. An actor was on stage babbling an info-dump to the audience. (Frederica and Vern said it was about war and love lost. Cliché crap.)

Hayli blushed, “Because I want you to enjoy things I enjoy. That's part of friendship, right?”

My eyelids and eyebrows lowered. “That's not friendship. Enjoying spending time with someone regardless of what you do is friendship."

“Yeah, but that feels hollow. Besides it's a good play, you'd enjoy it.”

“Maybe, but you've met Vern- I need to watch them.”

“What if I watched them?”

“You're the one who actually likes the play.”

“Ugh, come on- watch the play. You're ruining the advice Sairah gave me on making us the best of friends. Forcing you to enjoy everything I enjoy. Te- Earth, please just try to watch it?”

That sounded more like advice on creating a worshipper. “So, if I make this even slightly more like the horrible advice the giant bear gave you, you’ll be happy?”

“Perhaps. She also said sleepovers are great for friendship. That one's from the High Mother.”

“No.” I start walking again. “Definitely don’t listen to her advice. She’s awful at it.” (Seriously, Bianca is the last person anyone can trust for advice on anything interpersonal.)

We reached our box and walked back in.

“That help sure took a while, Earth. You take a detour or something. Get lost?” Vern said as we entered, voice crisp with punchability.

“I can spit in your drink.” 

Fredericka turned her neck to look at us, “You two are late. The first act has already begun.”

“And? What did we miss?”

“Overused dialogue, overcomplicated plot for a simple story, and an awful sense of pacing.”

“Huh.” I sit down after handing them their drinks. Hayli tests both drinks and hands me the left one. She sits and continues her leaning on me. I try to look towards the two but her nails dig into me and force me to at least look towards the stage.

“Oh, Vesi. My darling. Where do you walk in this void?”

“My lo- My lady, there is no one there. Come in, come in.”

“No! Vesi is in this dark void, she is alive.”

“Vesi is dead, she died saving us. Come in, lady, before a cold you go and catch.”

“Vesi is not dead. A warrior like her could never die fighting in a common battle. She is in the void, calling to me. Beckoning me.”

“You’re mad, my lady. Freeze you shall if you continue this.”

I look up from the stage. That had been so cliché that it was impressive this was a masterpiece. Critic usually hated clichés. Perhaps they had originated in this play. I felt a kinship with the main character- though the time we had to spend with her as a man was annoying- it felt like before the spell turned her into Lana all she did was complain and be and asshole. Really the fact she got a wife at all was impressive. 

I look over at Hayli who intensely watch the play, paying no attention to me. Apparently, she actually had not lied about this being a play she liked. I had to question her taste so far. Fredericka looked like she was casually viewing it, and I think Vern was busy looking at the audience.

The scene changed to a gathering of the upper class. 

“Landa, it’s been ages since I saw you, what corner of this world did you hide friend?”

“It is Lana, dear friend. I hid not. I stood always by the void grieving for my true love lost forever, for with my heart death has tinkered and played. So, sorry friend for me absence, truly. But, you would be scarce too, in my heels.”

“I can see you’re still upset, Lana, friend. You have grieved for forty four plus four days, Vesi would not wish you to be sad, right?”

Vern at this point had started to read a pamphlet about the playwright. Fredericka was leaning forward in attention and Hayli was still ignoring me. I had her glass and mine on my lap now. My pants were wet with the perspiration.

Another act though and she fell asleep. I guess she hadn't slept in anticipation for watching it. She had her head at the end of the bench and her bottom half on me. I placed the empty glasses under the table. Every so often she would kick in her slumber, coving my face with pink fabric. This was probably punishment for something.

A few more scenes and acts passed as Vesi and Lana converse on the stage.

“Lana, my love, why do you grieve? My life was not wasted saving thee.”

“You didn’t deserve to die such ignoble an end. All you leave me is a broken heart to mend.”

“I saved you because I love you my foolish lady, I do not regret my death at the demon horde.”

“I watched as the tore you, ate and burned you and turned the sky a darker hue. Your body desecrated and my heart in two.”

Wow. Was it necessary to say what happened to her body? Was it hard to find a line to replace it? Also how did Lana escape?

The play ended on Lana killing herself out of grief after three and a half hours. Wow, incredible. Bury the only queer characters. That's good. I poked Hayli awake and we left the theater.

“Sorry for falling asleep, Earth.” She yawned and stretched. We had split off from my brother and his date. 

“I wish I could have fallen asleep.”

She shook her head. "Did you enjoy any of the play?"

"I did like the main character. The tragedy of their love and going from a worthless lord to a happy lady to a depressed widow was one that... I was able to relate to more than the side characters stagnant arcs."

"Well then, if they ever stage the spiritual sequel, I'll take you."

"I enjoyed one character Hayli, not the whole play."

She shook her head. “So, you want to eat at my place or see if LDC is open?”

I smiled, “Your place, just don’t wake Sairah.”

"I'm not the one who banged the pots together last time."

"I was drunk."

"And you aren't now?"

"Fine. Let's check LDC."

Hayli smiled and whistled as we walked. "So... any other reasons you liked Lana?"

"What." I stare blankly at her.

She shook her head, "Yeah, you wouldn't recognize that would you. By the way, I'm ordering this time."

"Ugh. Fine. No seafood please."

"Got it, seafood."

I groaned as we entered the restaurant and sat down. I wished it hadn't been open if I had to try to stomach seafood.