I... wasn't a good person, that was something I had accepted a long time ago, since Layla had left us my mood, which in itself was never the happiest, got worse every day, the stress of work, the insecurity of not knowing if I would see her again, the feeling of uselessness, seeing my daughter's face, and knowing that she would not grow up next to her mother, all the weight of those negative feelings invaded me, making me more distant and embittered.

I was aware of that, but I lacked the will to do something about it, every little problem began to look like something more annoying, every thing that didn't go the way I wanted or planned made me lose control of my emotions.

I knew that if I stayed by my daughter's side sooner or later I would end up doing something that I would regret for the rest of my life, so consciously or unconsciously I moved further and further away from her.

Every night staying later in my study reviewing documents, and every business trip lasting a little longer, I had to keep my mind occupied, I had to do it so I wouldn't think about the failure of the man that I was.

Unable to save my wife, unable to give my daughter the support she clearly needed, and unable to do anything but wallow in my bitterness and self-pity.

And of course, I couldn't forget one of the people I hated the most, a child, of all people.

Jean Faure was a name I heard a lot in this house during the time my wife was still with us, Layla, Lucy, and the mansion staff all seemed to have positive opinions of the boy.

I had no particular grudge against him then, of course, the idea of a boy being so involved with my daughter disgusted me a little, though not enough to drive me to do anything drastic.

I really didn't know at what moment that displeasure turned into a real rejection of him, perhaps it was because my own family seemed happier by his side, perhaps because I noticed the way my daughter looked at him, maybe it was simply because our case was one of those in which two people never understand each other, I didn't know.

But what I did know was that I would prefer to keep him as far away from me as possible.

And everything escalated the day that Layla returned from the capital, her condition was more than serious, and I had no idea how to handle the situation, that day I had an important meeting with a possible investor, and I canceled it before giving the guards at the entrance the order to not let anyone in, and to notify me of any visitor with the idea of excuse myself with the investor when he arrived.

But when I saw the child there, my already bad mood worsened even more.

I didn't have the time or the patience to deal with him, and I didn't have to explain anything to him, so I threw him out giving explicit orders not to let him pass before I got back to Layla.

But when I was about to go into his room I heard footsteps behind me and saw the child, how did he get in? This was a delicate family moment and he had nothing to do here, so I wanted to get him out of my house.

But when he asked about Layla I stopped, I didn't know how he would have found out about my wife's condition, but I didn't want him near her, however, it seemed that she had already heard his voice, so even when he had a sword in his hand I was forced to let him pass.

The diagnosis he gave was even more fatal than he expected, Layla's life was escaping from her hands and I didn't even know the reason for this.

But what bothered me the most was that when the child asked her the reason, she hesitated to tell him, even when I asked her, she replied that she couldn't tell me without hesitation, but with this child, did she consider it?

I... I knew it was wrong, that there were more important things, but still, I couldn't help but get annoyed.

Shortly after, the child left my house promising he would find a solution, and due to my bad mood I left Layla alone to lock myself in my study, that night was the first time in 15 years that I drank to the point where I didn't even remember the moment when I had fallen asleep.

The following days I isolated myself, what else could I do? I was in no condition to be by Layla's side or to comfort Lucy.

The days and nights passed, until someone knocked on the door of my study, I ignored the noise and poured myself another drink, but it went on and on until my head started to hurt, so I walked to the entrance and opened the door, ready to fire whoever was bothering me.

In front of me, I could see one of the guards at the gate, my pain deepened, first, they were unable to stop the child, and now they bothered me?

"You're fired, get out of here". I snarled at him before trying to close the door, but his foot was planted in front of the door stopping me, my teeth ground, and I was about to call more guards until he spoke.

"Miss Layla sent me, she wishes to speak with you". He said before turning and leaving.

My eyes widened when I heard her name and I was about to run to her room, but after taking a couple of steps I felt dizzy, my head gave a pang of pain, and my mouth felt dry.

I couldn't let her see me like this, so I did my best to resist the hangover and went to the bathroom to wash my face and teeth in an attempt to hide the smell of alcohol, after that, I changed as fast as I could and went to her room.

When I opened the door and saw her I couldn't help biting the inside of my cheeks in frustration, my Layla, once radiant and vivacious, was now haggard, she looked tired, and I hadn't even had the courage or decency to be by her side in her most painful moments, but still, she gave me a small, concerned smile.

"Jude". She said, and I couldn't help feeling a pain in my chest from the tired tone that her voice.

"I…"

"Don't worry, you don't need to excuse yourself or say anything, I wanted you to come because I wanted to be the one to speak, would you grant me that wish?"

Every word of hers hurt me more and more, I wanted to run away, I didn't feel worthy, and I felt that just being here was something I had no right to, but still, I buried my pain and my shame and stayed because she wanted me to.

"I don't have much time left, Jude, every day I'm more tired, with each passing day, the hours that I'm asleep increase, I… I feel that I will not last more than one more day". She said, and it was like my heart broke.

Was this really the only thing I could do? Look? Being left behind to be a simple spectator of the end of my wife's life?

"Somehow I have a feeling that Jean will appear tomorrow"

The mention of that child managed to displace my frustration, if only for a moment.

"You... do you really expect him to have a solution?" I asked, incredulous at the idea, did she really trust him that much?

"I don't know how to express it, but I think he saw how much time I had left, so if he is going to come, I think he will tomorrow"

The idea of having to entrust the life of one of the people I hold most dear to someone I disliked was hateful, and I felt like my bitterness would drown me, but if he saved Layla I would do anything, even if he asked me to kneel in front of him I would do it for Layla, so for the first time I really expected something from that child.

"I understand it". It was the only thing I could answer.

"Jude, do you remember when you proposed to me?"

"Eh?". I found myself confused by her question, but after a second I regained my composure and answered. "How could I forget, it was the most embarrassing day, but also one of the happiest of my life". I answered honestly, and she laughed a little.

"Nothing you planned went according to plan that day, the actor working in the play you took me to tripped off the stage while holding a torch and caused a water mage to shoot a stream of water to put out the fire and we both ended up soaked, in the restaurant where we had dinner you ended up locked in the maintenance closet due to the confusion of a waiter and the bridge where you proposed to me collapsed and we fell into the river". She said as she chuckled a bit.

"And even with all that, you accepted my proposal, although I still don't understand why". I sincerely asked, after all, in my opinion, as a date it was terrible and as a proposal it was questionable.

"Of course I did, I had already decided that you were the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with"

"I don't know if I can really go on, but I want to tell you that even though all these years weren't perfect, I wouldn't trade them for the world". She assured me at the same time that she was smiling and a tear fell down her cheek.

I couldn't take it anymore, I hugged her and burst into tears before the only person I would allow to see my weakness.

I had no idea how long we were like this or how tired I really had been until I opened my eyes again and realized that I had fallen asleep holding her, I hadn't been with her in the last few days, so if this would really be the last night I would spend it with my wife, I wanted to spend it with her, just holding her and sleeping next to her, just like we had in the past; when I had everything, but I wasn't even aware of it.

The day came, and the moment I found out that Grammi had arrived I left her room, leaving her so she could talk to Layla calmly.

I didn't know what else happened until Grammi and Aquarius found me in my study a couple of hours later.

In the end, he didn't save her, my fists clenched, and I felt stupid, but even so, there was still hope, Layla could still come back, so even if I hated him, I was grateful to that child.

So I decided to do it, even if I hated doing it, I wanted to have a proper conversation with him, I… I needed to do it, I thought a lot about what I would say to him, and I believed that it was time to make amends.

So when we were in the same room after Grammi left us I took a breath and got ready.

But after saying the first sentence, he interrupted me, didn't let me continue, and he started telling me how horrible I was, that he would work for Layla's good, and implying that he wasn't worthy of being Lucy's father.

I was surprised but mostly annoyed, when he left the room I growled as my teeth ground and my fists clenched.

I had come here to offer a consensus, a form of ceasefire in our tense relationship, and yet all he did was criticize me? I felt stupid, all I wanted was to go after him and throw him out of my house making it clear that he would never be welcome here again, but I knew that Layla had made it clear to all the employees that this child would always be her personal guest so he should be received as such in this house.

My annoyance didn't stop growing, but I couldn't let her out here, not in this room, not in front of Layla, so I left her room after a few seconds and went to my study, slammed the door, and threw everything that there was on my desk before I uncovered a bottle of the strongest whiskey I had, I knew that tomorrow I would have a hell of a headache, but I didn't care, this was going to be a long night.

#####

The years passed, and I felt more and more the need to keep my mind occupied, I didn't want to think about anything, neither about my inability to help my wife nor about the loneliness that I knew my daughter was experiencing, I didn't want to face any of that.

But in a corner of my mind, a question kept repeating itself, why can't Layla wake up yet? The few times I saw him I couldn't help but scream in my head.

'WHAT ARE YOU DOING?'

'DID YOU NOT SAY YOU WOULD DO EVERYTHING YOU POSSIBLE TO WAKE UP LAYLA?'

'WHY DO YOU WASTE TIME?'

'WHY YOU DO NOT DO ANYTHING?!'

Every day I grew more impatient, every day I felt that we had all been fooled, and that Layla would never come back, but against all my wishes, I kept holding back, kept waiting for a solution that never seemed to come.

But the straw that broke the camel's back was when I found out that he was going on a trip, and worst of all, I found out neither from him nor from my daughter, but from a conversation that my house staff members were having about how he would be leaving the next day.

That day I lost control once again and left my house, I couldn't stay there, II felt like I would be doing a stupid thing if I stayed, although I didn't know what kind of stupid it would be.

He, who filled his mouth with broken promises was going to leave her? After all this time, after all that talk, just like that?

I came home drunk once more and walked into Layla's room with a bottle of cheap liquor in hand.

"Layla, is this really what you expected? In this classh of liar did you place your trust and hopesh?" I asked her as if I expected her to answer me as I walked towards her with irregular steps due to the amount of alcohol I had drunk.

"Thish miracle child ish nothing more than a fraud, incapable of keeping hish word, incapable of saving you, who knows if he doesn't keep you in this state for bad intentionsh". I blurted out whatever came to mind as I looked at the sword she was holding in her hands.

"If I take thish from you, would you wake up? Please answer me Layla". I ended up pleading tearfully before falling to my knees next to her bed, resting my arms and head on the mattress. "Pleashe come back". I said before falling unconscious.

When I woke up the next morning the only thing I could feel was shame, I didn't even dare to call the maids to change the sheets that were now stained with the alcohol from the bottle I had had, and I ended up doing it myself.

I left the room hoping no one would see me, and took a bath before changing, my head felt like it was being hit with a hammer, so I went back to my room to sleep for the rest of the day, I didn't want to do anything else for today, but I already had plans that would start tomorrow.

I had decided, I was going to talk to Lucy, as far as I knew, she also knew that he would leave, she did not know how she had taken it, but for me, it was a clear sign of disengagement from his promise and responsibilities.

I would look for a solution to save Layla, so I didn't care if he came back or not but I didn't want him to see my daughter anymore.

####

"WHAT DID YOU SAY?!" He screamed as his fist slammed into the study desk.

"M-Miss Lucy left, from what the other employees told me, they saw her leave last night with a suitcase and the only thing she left was this note in her room". Said one of the employees that he had hired that same day to be Lucy's personal guard.

Someone who would make sure that she did not go near the Faure store and who would reinforce the manners that she had stopped practicing years ago, he had been too soft for too long with his daughter, so from now on he wanted to take control of her life.

He took the note with all the contained fury his body could hold before reading it, all it had was a prayer, one that contained a declaration and a request.

"I'm going with Jean, don't look for me". His hand clenched the paper and crumpled it as he felt his palms sting from the force he was using.

He had first failed Layla, then abandoned her, and now he had taken her daughter? He didn't want her near that guy, not only because of the grudge he had for him but also because he would never entrust her safety to someone like him.

He quickly got to his feet, dropped the paper, and walked out of the room, leaving the newly hired guard nervous about what he should do next.

If that irresponsible liar wanted to take his only remaining family, then he would have to do it over his dead body.

---

And cut, as you see Jude even though he's a complete jerk to Jean, that's not to say it's completely bad, in fact, as this chapter makes clear, if Jean had let Jude talk, maybe their relationship, although it definitely hadn't been friendly, they would be on more peaceful and comfortable terms for both of them.

But Jean is not perfect, as he said in the previous chapter, in this situation he was immature, but of course, that does not mean that Jude also hasn't quite marked flaws, but after all, he loves his family, the problem was that Layla wasn't there to act as the voice of reason and counterweight in all of this.

And in the end, the man has reasons to think that Jean abandoned the idea of saving Layla, after all, he left without telling anyone about the place he was going to or his objective in this place, although everyone understands that he is still looking for a solution to Layla's problem, everyone except Jude.

In the end, although Jude has his faults, very pronounced if you ask me, it is also clear that he loves his family, but from time to time he needs a wake-up call to react appropriately, whether this wake-up call comes from his wife or his daughter.

Anyway, in the next chapter, we start with the "What If", which will consist of 3 chapters, see you next time, Ciao.