Chapter 30: Singing with the bros
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The instruments flared! Waves of sound bounces in the room!

🎶🎵

Who cares about loving?

While I’m struggling living!

I got sick of working!

So, I ended up stealing!

The police ain’t bluffing!

Now I’m running!

Add some swimming!

Some more mugging!

Want that thing?

Buy a Wing!

Be a King!

Now Dying!

🎶🎵

Dewey and I are in a recording studio. How did we end up here? Drinks? I do not know. Doesn’t matter though. Dewey and I are both playing guitars.

We have a random guy we picked up on drums and bass. Plus a violinist and a guy with a trumpet somehow? He’s not out of place compared to the guy with rubber animals that makes noises.

“Let’s go play another song! We’ll make a hit album and show those women we don’t need em!” says Dewey.

Yeah!

We’ve been playing some pretty ridiculous songs. I mean, we titled of the previous songs we sang as ‘A step above a sex doll’. I’ll edit them later.

Another tune plays and Dewey sings.

🎶🎵

Who goes to the battle? Oh, that’s the footman!

Who’s there by the bushes? Oh, that’s a bushman!

Who’s that in the forest? Oh, that’s the woodman!

Now what do they have in common? They’re not a stupid woman!

HO HO HO HO!

🎶🎵

Dewey motions for me to be next. We’ve made five songs like this already. I got swept in by the flow. And I ain’t stopping now!

🎶🎵

Who begs in nighttime? Oh, that’s the poor man!

Who’s works at the hour? Oh, that’s a layman!

Who sails in the ocean? Oh, that’s the seaman!

He told me a cracking joke! And oh!

It was a good one!

They’re always so absuuuurd. Oh, that’s a woman!

🎶🎵

The lyrics don’t even make sense! But I like it!

“Give us a rubber ducky solo!”

Th guy with rubber animals squeezes two ducks with a passion. He rotates his arms in front so the ducks alternate their turn on the mic. It should sound ridiculous, but it doesn’t!

“Let’s make another song before we take a break!” says Dewey.

We hype ourselves up and a tune plays. Everyone then sings.

🎶🎵

Bros over hoes!

Hanging out with the Joes!

NO HOMO THOUGH!

🎶🎵

This is amazing! We are so in sync. We didn’t write the lyrics. Yet the same words come out! How beautiful. It brings a tear to my eye.

Dewey then starts to freestyle.

🎶🎵

So I was talking with my bro.

I asked him how to please my hoe.

He told me to talk to the crow.

So I did. The crow was white; he called himself Albino.

The crow said to get the cargo.

In there was a piece of dough.

Stick it in release my ammo.

He said that way my dick will grow!

Then I asked my hoe for a blow.

Kicked me out of our bungalow.

Sleep outside until tomorrow

🎶🎵

Everybody sings!

🎶🎵

Bros over hoes

Hanging out with the Joes

NO HOMO THOUGH!

🎶🎵

We relaxed after that song. A non-stop session. I don’t think they’ll sound good if we listen to the tracks again, to be honest.

“We could finally talk to each other uh… I don’t know your names to be honest bros haha!”

“Just call me drums.”

“I’m bass.”

“Just refer to me as violin.”

“Call me trumpet.”

“Cool! call me vocals then!” says Dewey.

“Well, call me guitarbackingvocals, then.” I say. It’s a silly joke.

“Sure guitarbackingvocals.”

Well, that backfired.

“How about you on the uh… rubber animals, bro?” says Dewey.

“Call me doom.”

“Alright doom.”

How does that even fit? How did I end up as the one with the dumbest name?

“It’s weird how all of us ended up here. You all got woman troubles?” says Drums.

Everyone nods to that. I don’t have woman problems though…

“We have been married a long time. It seems like she no longer loves me when I still love her so much,” says Drums.

“My wife and I love music. She was supportive of my playing, but it seems she’s sick of it now. It’s getting harder to play as she was and still is my biggest reason for playing,” says Bass.

“I get you bass, but differently! My step-mothe—wife seems to only value me for my violin playing. She does not even go to our bed anymore. I feel so unloved!” says Violin.

Hold up. This violin guy almost said something dangerous. Are we going to ignore that? Guys?

“My girlfriend cheated on me with a guitar player!” says Trumpet.

That’s rough, but are we ignoring Violin’s slip up?

“My longtime girlfriend moved to a different country and wouldn’t even let me say goodbye to her!” says Vocals (Dewey).

I know that already… Did I hear Violin wrong? Am I the only one?

“When my grandfather died, my grandmother became my only family. We went through the good and tough times together. My love for her transcends family. The time we spent in symphony are some of my best memories.”

Author bless you, brother.

I think he must have loved his grandmother a lot. He’s being confusing, but I don’t think he means—.

“Our married life together was the highlight of my life,” says Doom

He loved her way too much.

Author bless you, brother.

What in the author’s name! Violin? Who cares?

“It’s been seven years now since she died,” says Doom.

She’s dead?

Author bless her brother.

“Then two years ago, I met my long-lost twin sister.”

I don’t like where this conversation’s going.

“We ended up in love with one another… But I feel like I’m betraying her!”

“Author bless you, brother.

I think everyone’s brains malfunctioned. Mine included. It’s a good thing my turns not coming up. Everyone is done with stories for today.

My hands play the guitar. The other instruments, one by one, enter the music.

🎶🎵

I’ll love her till I die…

You don’t have to ask me why…

Love is something you can’t deny…

That’s why it hurts to say goodbye!

Oh! Honey/Lovely/Darlings/Mandy/Hilda/Mommy/Granny!

Image

[collapse]

🎶🎵

I think two of those are suspect. Maybe three of them?

In the end.

We started singing songs about love deep into the night.

Many a man’s tears were shed.

No homo though.

Mistakes? Where is it? WHERE IS IT!

7