The night after Razuko had realized she was trans, and written the letter to Pama nga Togaika, author of The Orphan Actress, I was finishing reading the books the family had acquired in their recent trip to the bookstalls, and attempting to make contact with the spirits of the nearby houses. Since Duzoso had made contact with me some days earlier, I had been trying to initiate contact, but had so far only succeeded in communicating when one of them reached out to me. They assured me I would eventually get the hang of it, but that it sometimes took newly settled-in spirits years to develop the ability to extend their voice and senses beyond their natural boundaries.
I proved to be an anomaly in this as in some other ways, however, as I succeeded that night in contacting Torgaimu, the youngest spirit in the neighborhood besides myself. We talked for several hours about the humans who lived in our houses, and they congratulated me on projecting my voice clearly at such a young age.
“I am used to doing so from back home,” I said modestly. “Although it was easier there; one could speak with household spirits, vehicle spirits, and people all over the world, not just in one’s neighborhood.”
This led to questions about vehicle spirits, and I told them about Magellan and Hudson, the AIs that drove the Watsons’ two cars.
* * *
The postal system in the bigger cities of Modais was well-funded, fast and efficient, like some postal systems in Western countries before the telephone and then the Internet became widely deployed. It was three days after Razuko sent the letter to Pama nga Togaika that she received a reply, and I suspect it spent most of that time sitting in the publisher’s office before being forwarded. The return address simply had the author’s initials, not her full name, so Mipina and Bisur were not alerted that Razuko had received a letter from a woman. Indeed, Mipina remarked to me not long after the letter arrived and I levitated it up to Razuko’s room that she was glad one of Razuko’s school friends had finally written back. “They have been such bad correspondents,” she said with a shake of her head.
Razuko eagerly opened and read the letter, which I had already read using the same sense that let me read any book or manuscript in the house. It was as follows:
“My dear Razuko,
“Thank you so much for your letter inquiring about The Orphan Actress. That book is dear to my liver, though to my sorrow it sold fewer copies than my other books and my publisher has declined to publish more like it. Perhaps with a few more letters like yours, I can convince him to the contrary.
“Indeed, it is based on fact, specifically the life of a friend of mine who began as an actress and has become more of a playwright in recent years. I altered some details for dramatic purposes; she is not an orphan, nor did she begin in the middle class and lose everything before joining the theater. She was born to a working-class family and her parents are fortunately still alive. And she has never become as famous as her fictional daughter. But the means by which she — and I, and a couple of our other friends — acquired the feminine bodies we now have are real.
“I suspect you are like me and her. If I am jumping to conclusions, I apologize. But assuming I am correct, well, I can only advise you to save your money for a surgeon’s fee, and consider whether you want to have all your male parts removed, or only your testicles. The latter is somewhat safer, with fewer potential complications, though the former is not as dangerous as it used to be with today’s surgical techniques. The herbal drug to gradually make you grow breasts and hips and so forth is less expensive than the surgery, but is an ongoing cost for the rest of your life, though you may elect to stop taking it around the age when born women go through their change of life. The drug is somewhat effective before the surgery, though it becomes more so after the testicles are removed.
“If you cannot afford the surgery or the drug, you may be able to live more happily simply by shaving frequently, wearing your hair loose, and dressing in women’s clothing. I know some people and have heard of others who do this and are, if not perfectly happy, much happier than before they changed their clothing and habits of life.
“If I am making somewhat incorrect assumptions, and you were born a girl and wish to be a boy, there is another drug that is fairly effective to make you grow a beard and body hair and help you build stronger muscles. I am not as familiar with it, as I know only one man who is like us, and have never discussed this in detail with him. I believe he had his breasts cut out by a surgeon, but I don’t really know; perhaps they were always small enough to hide.
“If you are well off, as I suspect you might be based on the quality of the paper you wrote to me on, you may have another option. I have heard rumors of a wizard, or perhaps more than one, who can transform wealthy clients into perfect bodies of their desired sex. But these are only rumors; certainly no one I know has ever had the money to hire a wizard, whether to transform our sex or to cure a hangnail. I have never heard of a wealthy person who lives openly as a changeling, like some few in the theater and the less respectable part of the middle class.
“All this assumes that you are free to change. If you are young and constrained by your family, you have my sympathy. You may need to choose between your desire to be a girl, and your desire to cling to what is familiar and comfortable. Abandoning your privilege and leaving your family to strike out on your own is dangerous, and should not be undertaken without evaluating the risks, but it may be the least bad path. I have unfortunately known one woman like us whose family browbeat her into giving up her dream and living as a man again. She was miserable and drank herself to death in a couple of years. Please don’t let that happen to you.
“There is more I haven’t discussed — learning women’s speech and mannerisms, removing unwanted hair, altering your voice, and much else. I will write again when I have time, but please write to me with any questions you have.
“Your most humble and obedient servant,
“Pama nga Togaika”
Razuko’s face went through a whole portrait gallery of expressions as she read this letter. I projected my hologram sitting beside her on the bed, as though reading over her shoulder, although I had already mastered its contents while I levitated it up to her room.
“This is good news,” I said when she had finished. “Although she warns you that you may have to give up everything to become a girl, I don’t believe that will be necessary, not after my conversations with your parents in the last few days.”
“What did you tell them?” she asked, clutching her hands to her chest.
“Nothing about you,” I reassured her. “I only told them something about Juniper and other people like her back home. I will not tell you what they said in reply, as I respect their privacy as much as yours, but I believe they will accept you as a girl — if not instantly, then after a little convincing. And if I know your father, he will chase down those rumors of a spell to change a seeming man into a woman — at least once he is finished with his current passion project.”
* * *
We planned for Razuko to come out to her parents that evening after supper. One of Bisur’s afternoon clients canceled her appointment by letter (the intracity post was delivered three times a day), so Bisur had a free hour that day and spent it working on the spell to open a portal to my world. And it seemed that he had made a breakthrough, for he told me, “I have solved it, I think. I don’t have time to test it now, because my next client should arrive soon, but we’ll test it tonight after supper.”
“Very good, sir,” I said, and immediately projected my hologram in Razuko’s room as well to tell her.
“Your father is eager to test a new spell after supper,” I said. “I am afraid he may resent a delay, however much he cares for you. Perhaps we ought to put this off until tomorrow?” In fact, despite the way her parents had reacted to my telling them about Juniper and other trans people, I was growing nervous about their reaction. If they reacted in the worst possible way, by disowning Razuko and ejecting her from the house, there would be nothing further I could do to help her, as I could not leave the house or even sense anything beyond its grounds.
“Maybe,” Razuko said uncertainly. Then, “No. I’m afraid if I put it off, I’ll put it off again and again until I have to go back to that terrible school and spend another year as a boy... I won’t spend another day as a boy if I can help it.”
“I commend your courage,” I said. “I will do my best to smooth things over, if your father seems frustrated with the delay.”
Razuko naturally seemed nervous and excited during supper that evening, as did Bisur for different reasons. Mipina noticed this, and asked them both what had gotten into them; Bisur answered plainly and in much technical detail, which allowed Razuko to put off her mother with a brief, “I’ll tell you after supper.”
When everyone had finished eating and I had begun levitating the dishes to the kitchen to wash, I projected my hologram next to Razuko’s chair and rested my hand on her shoulder, giving her a gentle telekinetic touch. “Excuse me,” I said. “Razuko has something to tell you all.”
Razuko glanced up at me, then back at her parents, and down at the table. Then she met her mother’s eyes and said, “I’m a girl. On the inside, I mean, in my liver, like Callie’s friend that she says she told you about. And I want to make my body into a girl’s, too, whether with surgery and drugs, or with a spell if Father can find or make one. Th-that’s what I wanted to say.” She cast her eyes down again, tensely waiting for their reactions.
Mipina and Bisur were both stunned, and did not reply right away. The first to respond was Zongi, sitting beside Razuko on the other side from my hologram, who blurted out, “You’re my big sister?” She leaned over and hugged Razuko’s arm, bringing a tiny smile to her sister’s face.
Mipina was the next to respond. “Oh, you poor thing! You must have been miserable... I’ve been worried about you, but I thought it was just overwork and missing your school friends.” She turned to Bisur. “Do you know a spell that can help him? Oh,” turning back to Razuko, “should I use ‘her’? Or would that be odd when we haven’t changed your body yet?”
“In my home country,” I said, “it is customary to use new pronouns as soon as someone like Razuko shares their true mental sex with their friends. Not to wait until they have completed their medical transition, which may take a long time for some people.”
“Oh, very well. To help her, then.” She turned back to Bisur expectantly, who had been looking thoughtful, stroking his beard and staring off into space. When he remained silent, Mipina nudged him, and he startled.
“What?”
“I asked if you could help Razuko change into a girl’s body.”
I thought about instructing them that since she was a girl, she already had a girl’s body. But since Modaisu lacked the terminology I would need to describe the sort of body she wanted, without devaluing the body she had now or the bodies some trans women chose to leave largely unmodified, I decided to remain silent.
“I’m thinking,” Bisur said. “There are some spells for healing congenital deformities that could be modified to serve. Another spell for changing fat into muscle that might prove a useful component... But at the moment, I don’t see how to create all the internal organs she will need to have babies. I’ll figure it out, though. It can’t be much harder than discovering a new world for the first time in over a century.” At this, he looked insufferably smug.
And Razuko? She looked absolutely radiant.
I love how he just instantly goes to figuring out the magic for her xD
That went very well! Bisur instantly getting lost in his brainstorming fits his characteristic, but once he speaks, it was clearly supportive. I’m happy for Razuko.
I think the liver being the core of a person is an interesting deviation, that still makes a ton of sense.
so this boy into girl is a real thing?
Yes, it's a thing in the real world as well as stories. Wikipedia has a good article on it. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transgender
A lot of readers and authors on Scribblehub are transgender. Some are people assigned male at birth who are actually women, others assigned female at birth but are actually men, and some are in-between or neither or both, like me.
She turned back to Bisur expectantly, who had been looking thoughtful, stroking his beard and staring off into space. When he remained silent, Mipina nudged him, and he startled.
“What?”
“I asked if you could help Razuko change into a girl’s body.”
...
“I’m thinking,” Bisur said. “There are some spells for healing congenital deformities that could be modified to serve. Another spell for changing fat into muscle that might prove a useful component... But at the moment, I don’t see how to create all the internal organs she will need to have babies. I’ll figure it out, though. It can’t be much harder than discovering a new world for the first time in over a century.” At this, he looked insufferably smug.
Like sees like, and the neurodivergent vibes that Bisur is giving are 💯
Woooo!!!!! Good for her!!!!!