Lichen was woken up by something disturbing its body. Lichen was tired. It couldn't physically feel exhaustion, but it could feel mental exhaustion. But at this moment it felt an emotion similar to frustration.
|A-.A.n.n.o.y.e.d.| |T.i.r.e.d. R.e.s.t.| |B.u.n.d.l.e?| |B.u.n.d.l.e!|
The bundle's presence made itself known to Lichen’s senses, and it was radiating unknown and healthy. It’s annoyance was forgotten, |J.o.y! J.o.y!| |H.e.a.l.t.h.y!| |N.o.t N.o.t.-h.e.a.l.t.h.y.| |�̢̟̯̈�̡̱̭̭͔̺̮̫ͨ͂͋̒�̛̠̮͒�͖̲̯̹͓̮̎̓̐ͣ͟�̮̳͙̻̟̱͙̥́͠�̟̥̞͔̳̫ͨ̈́͞|
Unable to form the unknown feeling, it just ended up throwing out a wave of white noise — it was grating, unable to be deciphered, and just a cumulation of multiple feelings radiated at the same time, all fighting for dominance.
The Lichen wriggled in displeasure at its attempt, its sense felt grated — if put to human terms, nails scraping against a chalkboard.
Lichen started feeling the bundle for any remnants of not-health or any strange feelings. The feelings were all strange, but feelings that carried wrongness within them.
It found none, making it harrumphed of victory by wriggling. Lichen even felt the thing moving its body stop, which made it even happier. It radiated out joy, and even braided a few feelings together, |J.o.y, N.o.t.-.h.e.a.l.t.h. G.o.n.e|, it twisted the feelings of empty and void together to get gone, which made it even happier.
Lichen radiated overwhelming joy. It wriggled again, and started feeling the bundle. Now it could sense it without worry of not-health.
A bit of time passed as Lichen felt the feelings of the bundle — trying to comprehend their base idea, then the multiple feelings making up the major feeling, and finally trying to repeat the feeling back by braiding multiple feelings together.
But its feeling time was cut short by its bundle starting to leave its sensing range. It didn't want it to leave, it wanted to feel the bundles other feelings, |N.o. G.o.n.e!| |N.o. G.o.n.e!| |R.o.o.t!| |R.o.o.t. L.i.c.h.e.n!|.
The patch of lichen tried to make the bundle understand, but it didn't feel its feelings, and still continued leaving Lichen's sensing range. This made Lichen question if it was the only one of its kind. |Lonely.|
It had felt a little bit entitled to being able to feel the bundle from removing the not-healthy. It was having so much fun feeling its feelings, but it was leaving Lichen. |Lonely.| |R.o.o.t. L.i.c.h.e.n?|
But the patch of lichen still tried to communicate with the bundle, to make it stay, and not to leave it. |F.u.n?|
The bundle stopped. |J.o.y. R.o.o-|. Lichen's creation of feelings was shattered as a wave of emotion passed over it. Lichen could taste the potency of the feeling. It drowned out all others, making a void where only the bundle’s emotions existed.
Lichen was terrified, but sad at the same time. It knew the feelings weren’t directed towards it, but it didn’t know what to do. It had never dealt with anything like this. But it was wrong, and Lichen needed to fix wrongness.
Lichen began sensing the emotions to find their source, so it could remove the source, and that would surely remove the bad emotions from the bundle. They emotions were too chaotic. |S.a.d.| |B.u.n.d.l.e M.a.k.e. L.i.c.h.e.n. S.a.d| |F.i.x. S.a.d|
With newfound determination Lichen delves deeper into the raging pile of emotions. The emotions tried to consume Lichen, try to take part of itself, and replace it with the emotions.
Lichen fought back, delving deeper, and, |S.o.u.r.c.e!| it had found the source to the emotions. They were focused on, |N.o.t.-h.e.a.l.t.h!?|, It was the spot it missed before passing out. It noticed the not-health had changed, becoming stable and losing its wrongness, but in turn something else replaced the wrongness.
The feeling was the same as the aura that permeated Lichen's surroundings. The lichen didn't know what to do. If it was not-health the lichen could fix it, but it was the aura. It couldn't even fathom the idea to remove it. So it froze, it couldn't fix it, the lichen felt useless. |U.s.e.l.e.s.s| |L.i.c.h.e.n. U.s.e.l.e.s.s.| |U.s.e.l.e.s.s!| |F.r.u.s.t.r.a.t.e.d.|
Moments flew by. The emotions calmed, rose, and changed. Then the bundle fell back into Lichen’s senses. It felt ashamed, due to it being unable to help, but it didnt want to be useless.
Lichen felt its body being disturbed again, and the bundle’s emotions began to calm.
Its resolve steeled, and it began braiding a complex emotion. Making it denser and denser, slowly releasing it in hopes the bundle could feel it. The lichen was trying to match the feelings' strength, but counteracting them with opposite feelings.
They were powerful, wrong, sad, and many more. So it needed stronger, happy, joy, health, and any positive it knew. Even if Lichen couldn't remove the negative emotions it still wanted to comfort the bundle. It never wanted anything to feel those feelings, not because they were wrong, but something within Lichen hated the idea of them.
Slowly but surely Lichen felt the bundle’s negative emotions disperse and be replaced by calm. Its body was still being disturbed, but it concluded that it helped in removing the negative emotions. It didnt know why it helped, but it did, so it didn't care that its body was being disturbed.
The bundle finally stopped radiating the negative emotion. Lichen didn't stop though, and continued to comfort the bundle. It didn't ever want to feel those feelings again, and eventually it fell asleep.
Lost awoke. He let out a yawn, feeling refreshed. He noted that his back was sore from laying on hard ground. Dirt, moss-lichen, stone, roots?
He did not exactly know what he had fallen asleep on, but that wasn't the major problem of the current state. Lost’s mind was calm from the nap, but he knew he would start to panic again if he looked at his foot or even thought about it. So he deliberately ignored it.
He needed time to come to terms with it, but right now he needed to get away from the water, but at the same time he thought it might be better to do it when he was near the moss-lichen.
The moss-lichen just had this calming effect on him. Eased his heart, and cooled his head. Squeezing it makes me not stressed.
Was it now or later he would need to work this all out, and steady himself for anything like his — No, get away from that. — foot or worse.
He mentally steered away from bringing up his you-know-what, and forced down the emotions that came with it with a breath, and a squeeze of moss-lichen.
Letting go of the moss-lichen he internally made a plan, it’ll take a bit to go through it, but I don’t exactly have time, I do, but I don’t want to meet that alligator again, while I'm silently brooding and accepting all those emotions.
With that plan made in a few seconds of silent contemplation. Lost stretched on the ground, while taking in his surroundings, and adding them to his plan. A forest, and a lake. Not much.
Lost body cracked and popped, prickling in the pleasure of stretching a stiff muscle. I’ll brood while I walk.
Lost twisted his back left and right from the ground, popping it, then popping his neck with his hands. He rolled his jaw and blinked a few times to get the sleep dust out.
With half of his morning stretches done Lost’s mind woke up enough to form conscious thoughts. He got into a sitting position, then stood up using a knee as support.
“I always found it weird that someone can think without mentality vocalizing it.” Lost thought, while interlocking his fingers and stretching his arms forwards. A few pops sounded out, “ . . . Always?”
“I know stuff, but I don’t know why I know. Why do I know the stupids shit,” Lost twisted his back, arms out to his sides, “like … okay I didn’t need two know dolphin’s fuck everything. . . Am I just doing this to keep my mind on everything?”
He froze, arms still outstretched. Yes, Lost nodded with his mental answer. “It is better to keep your mind off something, till you get to a spot you are comfortable with letting your emotions out. I know I'll be in a gloomy state once I start. And that just feels like a fog covering my mind, damping my thoughts.” He began rolling his neck.
“Which it is better to not think while in that state, because one thought can muddle the emotions. Ruining their purity, and making it harder to understand them, and accept them. Just like I did when dad died. . . Died?”
A wave of emotion crashed into Lost’s mind, his knees buckled, and a memory took him.
Lost was in a room painted white. A dresser was in front of him, a nightstand to his right side with his phone on it, playing music. Lost laid in a bed, right arm covering his eyes. Tears flowed from them, moistening his arm hair. His chest ached in phantom pain, and his mind was foggy. He was allowing all of the emotions to come at him full force. He was no longer trying to comprehend them, and accept them, he just wanted to feel something.
Ever since his father died, Lost felt numb and empty. But after being called by, the memory fuzzed and returned to normal, he broke. The flood gates opened. He has been laying on his bed remembering everything about his father, from good to bad.
Then through the tears and pain he oathed to, the memory dispersed. Lost woke up in a cold sweat, not understanding what just happened.
“What the fuck was that!” Lost scream, “It felt so vivid, almost like I was there in the person. . .” His eyes water, ‘Dad. . .I miss him.” Lost slapped his cheeks, “No time. We already went through it, no need to do it again, well for now. I accepted it, but I still haven't gotten over it. . . No time me! Dad would want us to die like this. But what was that oath?”
“Nevermind.” Lost said, standing back up. He pointlessly brushed the dirt on him, Lost was covered in dry mud and blood. “Oh god that's a lot of dried blood,” sorry for using god in that way, but it calls for it, “How am I not dead. . .” Lost shrugged, “I'm alive, and that's all that matters. Well, minus the you-know-what part.”
Lost turned to the river. “Should I wash off? No.” He eyed the water longingly, “I'm pretty sure the mud is insulating a lot of heat for me. Blood or not, hypothermia would be bad.” He turned away, glanced at the moss-lichen, “Thank you.” He began marching into the forest of mangroves, kicking up a stick he saw on the ground and grabbing it.
“I’ll survive.” Lost said, but those words carried more intent than one could pick up. They steady him for which will come, forging his will to be harder than steel, but as flexible as water. He was ready for anything. He began twirling his stick, “I’ll name you sticky.”
He stepped through the line separating the shore and tree’s. The canopy covered him shadows, and protected him from the drizzle that pelted him.
“It’s time to explore and brood.” Lost said with a smile.
