“No, dude, you’ve got to get The Voice right; it’s like a Voice with a capital V, like Dune,” he said. “You know, Timothee Chalamet with all the bass turned up, except you turn the bass down, kinda, and not all raspy like the bald lady in the 80’s. You’ve got to sound like you want to be, but kinda mystical, and then it goes out from the mouth.” He gestured vaguely at his face and neck.

“Yeah, I heard the recording. It’s like: ‘I’m a pretty lady with good boobs’, but less squeaky.”

“You might have been close that time, but more, like, woo-ha, I don’t want to actually do it because it’s kinda sore on my chest; all the growing and shrinking. It’s more like: ‘I’m hot and I  A!HEM!’” He cleared his throat and his Adam’s apple came back. “Sorry, I felt it starting.”

“Yeah, I saw it. You know, I thought the video you showed me might have been you fucking with me, and the girl I met was like some actress you hired, but your chin really kinda changed there. Ok, you said it was like Dune, so let’s go: I must --” Wow, something was happening, hot in his(her?) throat. “-- not fea-r --” The R caught and croaked, “SHIT!”

“No no, you had it, you we’re doin’ it, but with a u like Dune it, dewin it.”

“Ok, again: I must not fear --” He felt it bitter in his mouth, minty, his neck felt warm, outside pulling in; he held his nerve. “-- fear is the mind killer --” Warmth over his face like a sunburn; he felt his eyebrows relax -- was relax the right word? “Fear is the little death that brings… Ow! You’re right, that does sting.” He dropped the phrase but not the Voice. It was still high and powerful; some part of his brain was focused there. His breasts hurt, and his head was being covered; was he making his hair longer? “Is it working?” The feeling paused as he did, but didn’t recede.

“Yeah, it’s working! You’ve got Bene Gesetits!”

“Oh dear god, if you keep saying things like that I’ll stop speaking like this… Urgh! weird! it’s going down to my eUeueuUGH! Uh, that went faster than I wanted! That had better come back when I stop.”

“Yeah, don’t worry; mine did, big as ever.”

“Somehow that doesn’t mean much to me, but I’m glad you got both of your inches back.”

“Stop that! You’re looking and sounding pretty hot right now, that’s too much like flirting!”

“Ok I’m just going to say some bullshit to get it all the way down to my toes aaaaaannnnndd, done!”

“Ha! I didn’t need to know about your girl toes.”

“Dude, what, are you into that? Gross!”

“No, I just... nothing... Take a look at yourself in the mirror and you can drop the voice and go back to normal.”

“How did you even figure this out?”

“I was aiming for Mickey Mouse, coughed a bit weird, and then I sounded like Marilyn Monroe and my dick was an innie. Like what you see?”

“Huh, I do, I’m hot! But how did you say I go back?”

“Just do your normal voice again?”

“How do I? Was I down here? No, that just sounds like a girl doing a boy. What’s the trick again, SHIT!”