He could still feel all of the emotions that had tormented him throughout his battle with that beast...Anger, sadness, fear, and terror had wedged themselves in his heart, and he had fully given into them, allowing himself to drown in his own madness and despair…

 

He raised his left hand and clenched it tightly, his vision of the candlelit room blurring as tears began to drip onto his fingers…

 

He now broke down in tears...

 

-I...I’ve been here so long...and...I know that I’ve been terrified for most of it...but somehow...!

 

[Hic!]

 

Fate: “S-somehow…*hic!*...I j-just making it out by…*hic!*...s-some miracle, a-and...t-telling myself…*hic!*...that I can…!”

 

[Hic!]

 

His tears sunk into his bandages, staining and wetting them, and he quickly covered his tear-soaked face with his similarly-soaked left arm, hiding his eyes…

 

-That I can...get stronger...and I keep trying to tell myself that...I am getting stronger, and that...sometime in the future, I’ll be able to fight back...to stand up for myself! But...every single f***ing time, I failed!!!

 

It was true, no matter how much he tried to train and reassure himself, nothing ever seemed to change. Even though his battle with the boar had ended in his victory, he had been forced to flee for most of the fight, and had only managed a victory by last-minute planning and sheer luck.

 

[Hic!][H-hic!]

 

He didn’t feel like he could count this as a win...the shame and pain that he felt now had eliminated that possibility…

 

-...In the end...even with 『Fire Magic』...I barely managed to slow it down! What managed to bring it to death...was Jacob’s potions...not me!!! And...this f*cking pain…!

 

He slowly removed his arm from his face, exposing his reddened eyes and tear-stained face to the silent, stone room around him and the sleeping servant by his side, who he, once again, began to stare at with guilt now fully grasping his heart.

 

[Hic!!]

 

Fate: “A-and again...I l-lost...and I c-couldn’t even...bring myself to do anything but run...w-when faced with that monster…!”

 

[Hic! Hic! Hic!]

 

-She...managed 

 

When he had burned himself in order to attack the boar, he was already too entrenched in his own madness to feel the pain that had only now become properly able to assault his body and mind. However, Liza…

 

[Hic!]

 

-...But...she...she managed to keep a smile on her face...she didn’t break...not like I did...but on the inside...what the hell was she feeling…?!

 

He had tearfully apologized for his actions, but if simply apologizing for your wrongdoings could completely pave over your past mistakes...the world would be a paradise…

 

-Just...because she smiled then...it doesn’t mean she wasn’t hurting...screaming on the inside...

 

Fate had soon shoved these regretful thoughts to the back of his mind, and had focused on understanding and escaping from the ‘shadow world’ that pulled him from his sleep, only for him to become trapped in the Witch’s game for an entire month, meanwhile, Liza was forced to suffer through the blistering pain that he had caused her while she recovered…

 

-S...she did that...it was because I couldn’t...no, it’s because I didn’t want to deal with my own problems...she allowed herself to suffer...so that I could focus…!!!

 

He had barely given any dedicated thought, and now, here she was, watching over him, even though he hadn’t truly done anything for her. Fate wiped the tears and snot from his face, as he thought about what she must have been through…

 

His mind now began to replay the experience of the flames dancing around his arm...such power at his fingertips, ready to scorch whoever he deemed to be his enemy...the thrill of waiting for his opponent to suffer nature’s wrath, only to suffer retribution for his hubris!

 

The flesh being scorched under the light of the flames, his skin cracking and peeling away, beginning to  melt the layers underneath...how the destructive element rampaged through his arm, even as he hammered away at the boar’s skull…

 

It was such a powerful force...and yet, if it could cause such harm to its own caster...what could it do to  those that it did not serve…?

 

-She’s...I-I...I don’t understand her…! How the f*** can she keep smiling...how the hell could she deal with that pain with only some tears and a whimper...how can...how can she keep smiling at me, the one who made her suffer through that?!!

 

All sorts of emotions swirled inside of Fate, crushing his heart!

 

He thought to himself...how he wouldn’t have had to have suffered…how Liza wouldn’t have suffered, if he could’ve taken action by himself...if he weren’t such a coward!

 

-How...how could I have stopped it…! How could I change myself...to not be this pathetic, cowardly loser anymore?!!

 

Anger, self-loathing, sadness, shame, madness, and more...these feelings took hold of him, leading his thoughts in one direction…

 

He could feel his entire body quaking, as he continued to clench both of his fists tighter and tighter, forming a pair of vice-like grips...If he had one thing...if he had the thing that could give him the courage to face whatever came at him...to have the confidence that he could stand against any foe, no matter how strong...

What was it he desired, what could grant his desires, and give him the power to achieve his goals with his own two hands...? 

 

Fate: “P-power…!”

Fate stuttered out in an enraged, hoarse tone, as he grinded his teeth together!

His bloodshot eyes were completely dry now, empty of tears, with the last ones slowly drying on his face...only a few dripping down to the soaked blanket below…

 

Suddenly, just as the last of his teardrops reached the blanket…

 

Jacob: “Power...is that truly what you think will help you, young master?”

 

A cold voice rang throughout the small room...

 

[Snap!]

 

Fate’s reddened eyes widened, and a furious expression appeared on his face, as, with a snap from a dimly lit corner of the stone room, the candles that were placed around him were snuffed out, plunging the room into darkness…

 

However, just as quickly as the light had disappeared, it soon returned, with the glow of a small candle that suddenly flickered to life in the corner, illuminating Jacob’s expressionless face…

 

Fate: “You…!!!”

...