Taking a moment to process what he had just witnessed, Carmen was unable to hide his praise for the creators of this 'Intro Message.' The thing itself was a First-Person perspective from the Creator of All, with the option to jump from his view to any of the other gods' views. It was truly an amazing feat of technology.
*Would you like to start Land of The Exiled?* [SAI]
"Yes, I'm ready for this new adventure." (Carmen)
*Beginning Boot Process, please enjoy this new world.* [SAI]
With that Carmen was brought to a space of pitch black, reminiscent of what everything was like before the Creator of All made everything. Following this thought process, a sprawling galaxy bloomed into existence and began to rotate.
Condensing, the galaxy turned into an identical copy of Carmen. The only difference was in the eyes. The eyes of this 'copy' were that of existence itself, all-encompassing as if one would be able to enter an entirely different world if they were to stare too long.
"Hello human, I trust that you are feeling no discomfort?" (---)
"Ah, I'm fine, thank you." (Carmen)
"That is good, I feared that this would fail." (---)
"What do you mean?" (Carmen)
"I am referring to the process by which I brought myself into existence." (---)
"Eh...?" (Carmen)
"Silly me, I mean that you are me and I am you." (---)
"Could you be meaning that I am a copy of you?" (Carmen)
"Indeed. Although, you are free to alter yourself in any way that you see fit, within the bounds of the race chosen of course." (---)
"That's pretty neat, I guess. Oh! What about my 3 choices?" (Carmen)
"Ah! Thank you for the reminder, it seems to have slipped my mind." (---)
Following those words, a prompt popped up in front of Carmen.
* Please choose one of the following cosmetic items:
->Weapon of Evil<-->Weapon of Good<-->Weapon of Neutrality<-
*
Looking at each of the options Carmen was confused. He had no idea what any of these would look like. Leaving it up to destiny, Carmen spun around and swung his hand down. Opening his eyes, Carmen saw that the prompt was still there, one difference was that there was an explanation.
*
->Weapon of Good<-
Item Type: Cosmetic
Use: Any Equipped Weapon
Description: A spirit of good will become one with any weapon you wield, transforming it into a representation of a Holy Weapon from the Church of Light.
*
Taking a moment in silent contemplation, Carmen considered how he wanted his character to look throughout the game. There were 3 possible routes he could go; dashing prince charming, mysterious expert, or random assortment noob. With these different choices, his future interactions would change.
With the dashing prince charming look, he could woo all females of the land and save the princess in the process. With the mysterious expert look, he could develop a cult following and possibly develop his streaming and raiding career. And lastly, with the random assortment noob, he would be able to have a very casual play-through, allowing for friendly interactions and close friendships.
Carmen was at an impasse, His choice would determine how much he would enjoy the game. The first two options had their perks, such as girls and fans, but the last option allowed for him to get the position of boy-next-door. This route of boy-next-door basically guaranteed that he would meet the much desired 'nice girl' ensuring he would have a life of love and emotional prosperity.
Looking to his copy Carmen made a choice.
"Hey, can you choose my route; Prince Charming, Mysterious Expert, or Boy-Next-Door." (Carmen)
"I am unable to choose for you, you are free to make choices at your own discretion." (---)
"Then get me someone who can." (Carmen)
*Contacting Customer Support.* [SAI]
"Ah!? Wait, that's not what I meant!" (Carmen)
*You have been connected to 'Karen' from Customer Support. Please state your issue.*
"Hello, this is Karen. If you have any issues, please state them now. This conversation will be recorded for the sake of improving our Customer Service system." (Karen)
"Ah! Yes, hi, hello Karen, my name is C-Carmen. I was wondering if you could help me solve an issue I'm having with s-selecting one of my three choices in the c-character creation portion of Land of The Exiled." (Carmen)
"What seems to be the issue; inability to select, item not received, no descriptions for items?" (Karen)
"No, nothing like that, I was just wondering..." (Carmen)
Carmen could feel the words trapped in his throat.
"Hello? Sir are you still there?" (Karen)
"Yes! I was wondering if you could help me choose between being a Prince charming, Mysterious Expert, or Boy-Next-Door!" (Carmen)
"..." (Karen)
"Hello... You still there?" (Carmen)
"Hahhhh...Y-yes, please hold as I consult with my superior." (Karen)
"Yes... I'm doomed." (Carmen)
*
Today started as the usual, I had woke up, ate, showered, dressed, waited in traffic, sat at my desk, answered the cries for help from these inept shut-ins. The key difference came when I got a Customer Service call from an SAI linked to one of the Limited Edition version capsules. As this one was no doubt a rich fellow, I composed myself and answered with my most soothing voice.
"Hello, this is Karen. If you have any issues, please state them now. This conversation will be recorded for the sake of improving our Customer Service system." I mentally gagged at myself for trying to appeal to this fellow I had no idea about. But if I'm to get out of this dead-end job, I must use my second greatest weapon; my voice.
"Ah! Yes, hi, hello Karen, my name is C-Carmen. I was wondering if you could help me solve an issue I'm having with s-selecting one of my three choices in the c-character creation portion of Land of The Exiled." Grinning, I knew I had snagged this fellow. He was stammering all over the place, no doubt enthralled by my voice. And by the sound of it, he seemed to not be too old, quite the bonus on my behalf--come to me Sugar Daddy.
Composing myself I continued to speak, "What seems to be the issue; inability to select, item not received, no descriptions for items?" Come, child, let this youthful mamma help you.
"No, nothing like that, I was just wondering..." He trailed off at the end there and I got lost in my thoughts as I waited for him to whisk me off to a life of luxury.
"..." (Carmen)
After waiting for close to ten seconds, I began to get worried. "Hello? Sir are you still there?" Somehow, I managed to let my worries come out in a way reminiscent of a loving mother. Ooh, I'm getting good at this.
"Yes! I was wondering if you could help me choose between being Prince charming, Mysterious Expert, or Boy-Next-Door!" Oh my, oh my, what a cute question. On second thought, I wouldn't mind taking care of the lad as a maid of sorts. I could become the maid he cheats on ever his wife due to his undying love for me, hah... I'm just too much aren't I. (✿◠‿◠)
After my own bout of silence, I must have worried the customer, "Hello... You still there?" He seemed so genuine, ah if only...
"Hahhhh...Y-yes, please hold as I consult with my superior." Ahhhh! I messed up, I let out a sigh. Good thing I know how to improvise, thank you high school me and thank you, high school boys.
"Yes... I'm doomed." He said as I was removing my earpiece and microphone combo. I could have sworn I heard him say something adorable... Time to go see Ms. Charlotte I guess.
Getting up from my lounging position, I began to make my way towards Ms. Charlotte's office.
