Finding Out Who’s Mice @mtcmouse - 2 minutes ago

Shit, it’s Christmas in a week, and I got someone to get gifts for this year. 

I

Finding Out Who’s Mice @mtcmouse - 1 minutes ago

Should I just take her shopping? I mean, she can materialise any clothes she wants for herself, so I’m not sure.

 

Shark on the Shelf @mtcshark - Just now

@mtcmouse Mom I can read your tweets too you know. 

 

I turned from my phone to see Šárka waving hers at me with a cheeky smile. Right, that was one of the most important pieces to get from her room. I am only mildly surprised she didn’t grab it when she got kicked out. “I’d love to go shopping. Just because I CAN change outfits doesn’t mean I don’t want a wardrobe full of them.” She pouted a little bit, and I let out a giggle. 

 

“Alright, alright, I’ll take you clothes shopping as a christmas present. Anything else you’d like?” She gently shook her head in response. And that’s when I got an email notification. “Oh, huh. Looks like a client. Do they all have to send an email while waiting here already?” I sighed and opened up the window again, as someone with a gecko tail climbed in in full costume. They shot their gaze first towards me, then towards Šárka, then towards Dare, who was currently in the process of making a card pyramid. 

 

“Greetings Miss, Miss and Pet-” The lizard-like stranger spoke

 

“I’m a Miss too.” Dare threw a peanut at them from the snack bowl. 

 

“Apologies, then. I am Grasp. I am interested in procuring some equipment for robbery.” They stood up and straightened themself out. 

 

“Age. Targets. Headcount.” I counted on my fingers while looking at them. “Šárka, sweetie, take notes. I know how quick you type.” She nodded in response and moved to the computer, writing down notes. 

 

“Age? Whose age? Mine?” They held a hand to their chest in mock ofense. 

 

“Yeah the last person to climb through my window to ask for thievery stuff is my 14 year old daughter over there, after her dad kicked her out.” 

“Oh. Well then. I am...25. Yes. 25 years young, haha. As for targets, well, anyone is fair game to me, if they seem to have the means. And I am not good in a fight or scuffle, thus my headcount remains at zero.” I narrowed my eyes at their answer. 

 

“So you’d rob anyone, even if they’re flat broke? Would you kill them if they resisted?” I stepped closer, and they looked around the room. 

 

“Well, yes, I might accidentally or on purpose have to kill someone to steal what they own.” I nodded. Then I placed a hand of mine on their shoulder.

 

“You seen Spider-Verse yet?” They didn’t get a chance to answer. Convulsing on the floor for a second from the shock before being knocked out. “Šárka, we do not deal with Chaotic Neutrals or Chaotic Evils. Sorry to ask you hun, but could you like, drop them at the edge of town?” Šárka finished typing away and quickly dove into action, being back home within five minutes. 

 

“Edge of town, like you asked.” I ruffled her hair and closed the window.

Finding Out Who’s Mice @mtcmouse - 2 minutes ago

I was expecting to deal with chasers or something, not with edgy fucks hoping for me to make them a death ray. 

I

Finding Out Who’s Mice @mtcmouse - 1 minute ago

I don’t think they realised my brand is nonlethal bougievore. Eat the rich, redistribute the wealth, don’t hurt the little guy

I

Finding Out Who’s Mice @mtcmouse - Just now

Scariest part is that a couple found my house. I’m going to have to get an office now. Or a new house. Or maybe… 

 

I’m not going to tell Twitter I just had the idea to build an underground facility below my house for me to keep stuff in. Especially because that’d compromise itI. Plus it’s probably illegal to dig a bunker under your house without a permit. And if I did it the conventional way, I’d have to tear down and then rebuild my house. And I cannot do something like that to my foster daughter. Nevermind that we’re currently busy going through a mall with people staring at me. Parents sneering or huffing away, kids being enchanted. Several of the very small ones trying to grab my tail. Most of them failing. The ones that succeeded got yanked away by their parents quickly. Telling them not to touch me as if they had grabbed something off the sidewalk. At least Šárka wasn’t being pestered like I was. I mean, she does look just like any regular 14 year old girl, just kind of a late bloomer and with short pink hair and eyes that pass for wearing contact lenses. 

 

Unfortunately, there’s nothing like Hot Topic in the Czech Republic. At least not as brick and mortar stores in malls. So finding her style was tough. You know exactly what kinda clothing is marketing to young girls and teens. Bright, colourful, tight, small. Šárka liked her clothes gothy, geeky and comfortable. It didn’t stop us from looking. And looking. And looking some more. “Well, there goes the magic of the holidays. Although I bet somebody out there turned into Santa. I’m hoping nobody turned into Baby Jesus cause we know how he ends up when he grows up.” We were going through a dress rack at that point, looking for stuff. Don’t get me wrong I love dresses but I was in a similar camp to Šárka on comfort. 

 

Which we were about to not have much of, as a helpful store assistant approached us. “Excuse me, if you’re looking for stuff, the boy’s section is over there.” Šárka and myself didn’t even have to exchange glances to be able to answer in unison.

 

“We know.” Her customer service smile was amazingly trained. Truly. A Death Squad could be holding her hostage and she’d be keeping the same smile. But I saw it in her eyes. The discomfort and disgust. 

 

“I just figured your brother here might appreciate shopping over there.” 

 

“She’s my daughter.” I turned to face assistant head on. Now, I understand customer service folk. Had a summer job taking calls right after graduating high school that turned into a part time job in uni. So I wasn’t going to go Soccer Mom on her. Honestly I don’t think I got the entitlement in me to pull it off. What I do have, however, is laughter to hide away the pain. “You seen a boy dye his hair pink yet? This shade of pink? Did you not notice the skirt, miss? I’m here with my daughter getting her christmas gifts. If we need help, we know how to ask. Thank you.” At that moment I looked towards Šárka, who shook her head and gestured to leave the store. “Looks like you don’t have what we’re looking for. Maybe if there’s a next time.” I returned the smile and walked towards the door, before turning around and walking through it facing her. 

 

“I’m in a skirt and look nothing like a boy, how the fuck!!!” Šárka threw her hands up in the air before crossing them. “It’s not like I can hold a 5 years on HRT for forever. I need to reach that point by adapting.” She huffed and I placed my hand around her shoulder. 

 

“The Cis are Oblivious. I mean, I came out to grandma, wearing a very pretty dress, obviously feminine with what I had done, and she still saw a boy. The most annoying thing is getting stuff like that from customer service workers. Like, y’all are busy dealing with soccer moms and you really make the time for casual transphobia?” Shaking my god damn head. We had spent like three hours at the mall by then, just going through clothing stores. “Come on, we’ve hit every clothing spot that might cater to you. Let’s hit JRC, see about grabbing some merch possibly, maybe a game and go home, what do you say?” Šárka looked up at me, sighed and nodded her head. 

 

“Dare asked to grab some puzzles for her to solve. I think it sounds like a cute christmas present for her.” I had to nod in agreement. 

Finding Out Who’s Mice @mtcmouse - 2 minutes ago

Due to unexpected circumstance your present delivery method this year shall be a robotic fox dragon.

I

Finding Out Who’s Mice @mtcmouse - 1 minutes ago

She did manage to get the outfit, but just be ready to see her coming down your chimney. 

 

“I’m not climbing down the chimney in this outfit for the gag, Bridget. Do you know how difficult it is to clean plastic feathers? Extremely difficult! Especially when they’re attached to you.” Dare was hanging out on top of the christmas tree, putting down the angel. 

 

“I do. Almost as difficult as not choking on carp bones while eating it.” I shouted from the kitchen, smacking the fish on it’s head with a mallet. “It’s amazing I found a small enough one for two people being sold. I ain’t gonna defrost a frozen carp fillet to make christmas dinner with when I got people here.” I grabbed a knife and began gutting. “Šárka, honey, I’m almost done with the gory part, I’ll let you know when the breading part comes.” I yelled back into the house, getting an “Okay!” from her bedroom. Careful with the organs now, don’t want to rip anything open. There we go, and onward to descaling and filleting. 

 

Oh, right, important fact, Czech Christmas Dinner doesn’t have a turkey. Nothing massive like that. Traditionally fried carp with potato salad, with fish soup as the first course. Some families replace the carp with pork cutlets, or with other types of fish. And I mean, no surprise, eating carp is like playing surgery. It’s full of bones you have to be careful about. But, it does taste quite lovely when coated and fried. 

 

The sun set, me and Šárka enjoyed our meal. And then presents happened. Turns out adopting a daughter and showing her off online will net you a LOT of packages sent to your P.O.Box addressed to her in time for christmas. Somehow. Maybe someone got teleporting powers and was using them for delivery? I heard rumors of folks called ryfters. Maybe I could use those to expand my web of influence, as currently folk have to come to me to get stuff, which limits my clientele. No way to ship a smoke bomb through the post. 

 

Finding Out Who’s Mice @mtcmouse - 24.12.2018 20:05

Ohmygod Y’all how did you get stuff for Šárka here so soon it’s only been like 10 days!!!! I’m thankful for y’all but come on!!!

 

The night had finished with us relaxing in a pile of shark plushies. The picture of that was on twitter right away along with that tweet. What woke me up the next morning was a text message. There were only four people in the known universe I had given my phone number to, one of them I didn’t talk with, one of them had fallen asleep on me in the pile, one of them employed me from time to time, and the fourth? According to the text message, the fourth was waiting outside. “Glad I got no alcohol cause this here is gonna make me feel like I got a hangover.” I gave Šárka a headpat and climbed out of the pile, making my way over to the front door. 

 

On the other side stood a familiar face. An extremely familiar face. To be completely honest, I had been looking at that face with minor differences ever since I emerged. Well, regular human features compared to my mouse girl traits aren’t really that minor. She stood there with her light blue hair in an undercut, snakebite piercings and an eyebrow one. Leather jacket over a plaid shirt, ripped jeans with leggings underneath them thank fuck, and combat boots. “You know you could have come visited right when it happened, sis.” 

 

“It looked like you had it under control, Bridget, based on your vids. Would it be rude of me to ask to feel your ears?” 

 

“A little bit. I mean go ahead if you want to, hell you squeezed my tits when they started coming in from HRT you little shit.” 

 

“Hey that was five years ago! I was 14 and you were developing faster than me.” She pouted and I giggled. 

 

“So. This is the traditional christmas visit? Crashing on my couch cause you’re still single and got nobody else’s couch to crash on after mom flipped her lid?” She shrugged and nodded. “Alright Klára, come in and meet your niece.” I moved aside to let her in, not noticing somebody had joined us before it was too late

 

“Dropfoxdragon!” Dare had landed on Klára’s shoulders before giggling to herself. 

 

“Bridget. Holy shit. She’s so fluffy!!!! You need to build me my own!!! Late christmas present!” I shook my head as we made it to the living room, where Šárka was yawning and rubbing her eyes awake. 

 

“Morning, sleepyhead, your aunt Klára came to visit.” She had already made her way to the girl in the pile of plushies, kneeling down and extending her hand. 

 

“Nice to meet you, Šárka.” She smiled at her as the younger of the two shook the older one’s hand.