Seeds of despair…
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The paths stretched before him, a divergence of striking contrasts. One branch shimmered with celestial stars, while the other was a humble muddy trail.

The disparity between them was unmistakable, yet all pressed onward. But as Zhou Tiandi attempted to step forward, he found himself hindered, unable to move an inch, let alone progress.

With each effort came an unexpected pain, foreign to one at his stage of advancement. Yet, there was a haunting familiarity to this sensation.

...

Seated at the edge of the chaotic sea, frustration furrowed Zhou Tiandi's brow. His very essence throbbed with an agony mirrored by his turbulent surroundings. In his grasp, a seemingly ordinary tree branch hovered, emitting a faint hum.

|...|

Gazing at the branch, he briefly shut his eyes. It remained stubbornly ineffectual, defying all his attempts to harness its power, its guidance. Though he glimpsed at the "paths" ahead, traversing them was something he couldn't achieve.

It was a maddening ordeal, each failure inflicting a stinging pang of anguish. Resolved to find a way, he decided to seek answers from the one who gave this branch to him.

Upon opening his eyes, he was met with an unexpected presence, already waiting to meet his gaze.

Though unfamiliar in form, the figure's clouded, dull-red eyes were ones he was familiar with. It was the one who gave him the branch.

This form was similar yet distinct from any of that person's other forms he had yet seen, this one had ashen skin, dark grey hair, five curved horns crowning his head and those eyes accompanied by a eerily warm smile.

||Having trouble, I suppose?||

|...| Zhou Tiandi remained silent, not quite baffled but definitely a bit astonished... 

||Why not ask what weighs on your mind?|| The words bore no hidden agenda, a privilege reserved for the powerful.

After a moment of pause, Zhou Tiandi spoke, |I can not progress at all.|

||Is that so?|| To this, the red eyed one's smile widened in what seemed nostalgia. ||Well, it can be a rather strange thing after all... But, how should I say this...||

Scratching his horn, the being's red eyes wandered through the surroundings turning towards the chaos sea. ||It's not as esoteric as you might imagine, in fact it's quite simple.||

|Simple?| Zhou Tiandi frowned as he recalled all of his attempts till now.

||It's quite like the ascension to the third step, If there was a difference then it was that this one begins with understanding and acceptance of one's own self and not merely the understanding of one's Path till now and one's desire. It is "the" truth of ours, the truth that will never be questioned, ||

|...|

||As for why you are struggling? It's because you're a coward.||

|...|

||You leave matters unresolved ||

|...|

||You know there are people who didn't wrong you, yet, you can't forgive them since you are just so used to blaming them. However, you know deep within you that you're lying. Accept "your truth" and you'll naturally ascend.||

|...|

||Is the reason why you don't like "that one" also, because you cant truly forgive yourself?.||

|...|

 

||I guess you simply can't give up on that? Well, that's to be expected. After all...|| His smile widened as he looked at Zhou Tiandi, ||That is what makes you Zhou Tiandi.|| A wind blew along with a dark mist.

||How about familiarizing yourself with the 4th step? Lets see...|| The voice echoed through the mist reaching Tiandi yet, he couldn't quite locate it's source. ||... How about familiarizing yourself with an old acquaintance.||

...

As the mist dissipated, a scene unfolded—a new life entering the world amidst cries of "Waah! Waah!"

Deep, dark hair framed a pair of violet eyes, with a feeble hand reaching out for the new life.

The feeble trembling hand reached out for the child, "This child... Jianyu..."

Thus, life was born, even as another slipped away.

...Birthed of death...

The newborn, bereft of maternal care, grew into a compassionate soul.

With a gentle smile, he tended to those around him.

However, soon sorrows began to taint his life with a dark hue.

"Yu'er!"

His grandfather, one of the few who truly cherished him, hastened to his side, worry apparent in his demeanor as he looked at the state of his grandson.

"Grandpa..."

Weakly, he replied, a smile gracing his lips despite his frailty as he tried to get up.

"No need to strain yourself! Just stay like that!" His grandfather however, was extremely worried especially after knowing what had happened. "Yu'er... Regarding your condition..."

Words faltered as he gazed at his grandson, he had no cure for his grandson. The chaos attribute that plagued him was innate to his grandson, even his very soul was of such nature.

But that didn't mean there was no way for him to help his grandson.

"Yu'er... You just have to live happily... Your grandfather will make sure to save you!"

Having lost his daughter, he feared losing his grandson as well... 'Why... Just why did it have to be him!'

He had done everything, he was prepared to give anything to anyone who could answer him... Yet, he was helpless.

"Haha..." 

His lowered gaze shifted to his grandson, who chuckled softly.

"I'll be fine, Grandpa!"

A radiant smile, yet it weighed heavy on his grandfather's heart.

...

"He's the one right?"

"...the one who killed his mother upon birth."

"Bending the sect's rules like that..."

Wherever he went such whispers trailed him like shadows. But, he did not care.

"These bastard with their mouth!"

He was happy since there was someone to get angry on his behalf.

"Haha, leave them be. It's not like such words can hurt me..."

Still a fragile looking child, yet grown to be a responsible young man.

Looking at his grandson who behaved as such, his grandfather felt afraid of what sorrows might this child hiding within his heart...

...

"Congratulations on this grand union between the two families!"

The two esteemed families, the Yin and the Xin family had United under the engagement between their young lady and young master.

The young lady of Yin family was also in a similar situation like his, so Jianyu attempted to befriend and help her.

However, no matter what he did, it always resulted in a failure and soon both had become estranged.

...

The boy now a man had grown stronger not as fragile as before with his strength now evident, something that would have been celebrated... Alas, a war set ablaze the five continents.

The young man partook in the war himself. Yet, even in war he mourned for lives lost irrespective of their origin.

His gentle smile remained for his comrades. After all, a smile will always spread happiness to others.

This was what he believed in and many followed him, truly believing him to be the true hope within the world.

...Yet, despair followed...

On a battlefield strewn with corpses, the weapons that pierced him pierced deepest of all. Yet the ones that stood out the most were the ones impaling his back...

"Why..."

The man asked, his violet eyes longing for an answer... 

Yet the one his eyes sought did not answer instead it was the another one who stepped forward.

"The Xin family has gathered too many enemies!"

"..." However Jianyu simply lowered his gaze ignoring that one, causing that one to frown.

"Ha! Well then, act tough!" That one snarled, "By now that grandfather of yours must've been dealt with as well~"

Jianyu's body twitched upon hearing this with his shoulders drooping. Seeing this only brought smiles to his enemies.

"Was it wrong for me to desire happiness...?" Jianyu asked again, however this time, his voice trembled with pain.

"Why must you do this..." Hushed words yet, they were heard by others clearly, "To betray and steal from from others..."

Silence reigned, broken only by mocking laughter. The enemy army laughed, mocked and took those words lightly.

Finally the one from before stepped forward with smirk, "Hahaha... It is the nature of life! To devour each other, to grow and to prosper!!"

"Nature of life?" Jianyu muttered those words over and over. "All that for your greed?"

...Do Fools like this deserve that hope?...

"Hahahhahahhahaha!" The battlefields had silenced again as everyone stared at the source of the laughter.

...Of course they do. How else would they understand...

"It's in life's nature to devour and grow? Then revel, for you shall ascend as life's pinnacle, unshackled by karma, untouched by death!"

...The echoing of those clinking chains...

"Aarghh!" Nobody knew how it appeared but a pitch black metallic chain pierced through the one who was mocking Jianyu... Wrapping around his body as his body began to convulse and change.

Another intervened, only to face a similar fate as yet another chain claimed yet another soul. "Vengeance? Surely you jest! Offspring of traitors, shielded and embraced as kin... Of course, such traitorous seed inevitably yields this fruit!" Jianyu continued to yell as he smiled at the one pierced by those chains.

Another chain materialized, seizing yet another soul, "I'll savor the death of your kin too... The fall of the oh so illustrious Yin family."

"Hahahahaha!"

...Echoing laughter, a chorus of despair...

...

⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅∙∘☽༓☾∘∙•⋅⋅⋅•⋅⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅

...

As reinforcements arrived, they were met with a scene of abject despair.

Chained down to the ground were countless beings, formerly creatures of life. They now belonged neither to death nor to life, With their hands clasped they repeatedly lowered their heads begging and praying in fear, not paying attention to anyone of the reinforcements. They continued their futile, desperate prayers, prayers that will only serve as a little melody for their "God".

"Feng'er!" Yin Meili rushed to where her "granddaughter" was, no one following her held any warmth for Yin Xifeng. Yet, even they couldn't hide their distaste for her current state.

A mound of a soul and flesh created from amalgamation of souls and body bursting with vitality as it continuously grew and as it grew, it ate itself to grow more.

As Yin Meili approached it a chain materialized barring her path.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you." The sudden voice drew all attention to a man seated upon a rock, his tattered clothes and unruly black hair framing piercing violet eyes. Till now none had noticed him. The man in that rugged state was one they were all familiar with. The man was completely unlike his former glorious state.

The people from Yin family felt guilt form in their heart as they saw him... or rather they would have if the Yin and Xin family didn't have a long standing rivalry. Moreover, some had even begun to look down on Xin family knowing what had happened to their patriarch.

"You...!" Yin Meili glared at him, not even attempting to hide her contempt.

As he met her glare his smile widened as he dissolved into the shadows... And thus began the Yin family's descent into despair.

A malevolent curse, or perhaps a vile disease, gnawed at the Yin lineage, consuming them from within. Their flesh became a prison for their souls, and even the matriarch fell victim to its insidious grasp.

...

"Why are you doing this?" Even the sect leader himself visited him desiring an explanation.

"The Yin matriarch..." He began, his gaze fixed on his painting rather than the sect leader, "Her decisiveness to help her kin no matter the cost truly is something that I admired."

"Then-!" The sect leader attempted to interject, but was swiftly silenced.

"I wonder... Had I possessed such resolve, would things have differed? I truly admire artists, being able to weave worlds through words, paint dreams through their brush... To be able to express their feelings in such a way. But alas, I am no artist. This bland canvas fails to convey my admiration."

With a dismissive gesture, he cast the canvas to the ground before the sect master.

A dreadful image, yet it lacked something, it was bland and inspired no emotions.

"So..." His smile widened as he continued, "I wish to plunge her into the same despair that I experienced, loss of all that was held precious."

...

It continued till only one true successor of that family was left, who begged the source of her despair for the sake of her family that the Yins were "spared". 

And spared they were. When asked for the reason for his actions, the cause of her despair answered with a smile, "I am sure you know why, already~"

Similar fates also befell the sect's adversaries... yet no clemency was shown to them.

...

⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅∙∘☽༓☾∘∙•⋅⋅⋅•⋅⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅

...

A withered husk, a body clinging to life yet destined to depart soon. "I... apologize..." Even on his deathbed, remorse weighed heavy upon him.

"There's no need." The woman at his side squeezed his hand, her worry evident in her gaze.

"It must've been hell to be married to someone like me..."

He chuckled lightly, though beneath the humor lay a well of emotions.

"I rather enjoyed it," she confessed.

"Ha... If only..."

"..."

"Ah... It's time..."

Leaving behind a wilted flower, "Despair" had reclaimed what was birthed of it. Xin Jianyu, the seed of despair had wilted.

...

 

 Born of a corpse

Marked by those violet eyes

 Wielding Broken chains, a symbol of the unbound

Yet, forever bound by despair

The seeds of despair struggle, only to be reclaimed by despair

 

...

These words etched themselves into Tiandi's psyche, summoning forth distant memories. An everlasting smile, violet eyes, a life etched with sorrow, and an end far too... 

|What do you want me to do then?| He asked.

||How would I know that?|| The voice seemed joyful at his inner turmoil, "I can guide you through your path or even to your very destination. But, If I guided to your path, would that even be your path?"

With the mist fading away, Zhou Tiandi found himself to be at his "abode" sitting in a lotus position as he held a ethereal branched structure.

He saw a path before him, that he would soon walk on. His mind felt light, his uncertainties had cleared... It was not that he no longer held any hatred, on the contrary his hatred was immense.

But it was now targeted at only one person, who deserved it all.

...

⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅∙∘☽༓☾∘∙•⋅⋅⋅•⋅⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅

...

Observing these events from his throne, his dulled red eyes gleamed with satisfaction. The power of guidance had functioned as anticipated... No, it exceeded his expectations!

Now, it was time to embark on his greatest endeavor yet.

||That figure... how nostalgic...||

It had been ages since he beheld that form from his youth. Reflecting on the past, he smiled. Those memories held warmth, yet he was not one to dwell in them indefinitely. Such was true for nearly all beings of his kind.

Self-serving creatures, indeed. Craving to mold existence to their whims, unwavering in their chosen paths no matter how flawed they were.

Thanks for reading, I'll be gone for 2 months now also, this was an alt version of Jianyu one without Zhou Tiandi intervention .

Also, do check out my new work! https://www.scribblehub.com/series/1027343/reincarnated-assassin-loves-the-fool-xianxia-kinda/ It's a good ol female assassin falls for a a dude and shit. Please read it!! 

Also, please join my discord so that you can ask me shit, tho it is pretty bare bones... since i dont know how to use it. But hey I will eventually understand how to do shit later on! https://discord.gg/k93Qv857B9

Ok then good bye!

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