“Happiness [is] only real when shared” 
― Jon Krakauer, Into the Wild

 

"I hate you all so, so very much," Kakashi hisses under his breath after another of his ANBU-mates asks if he's really planning on starting family, since he's so good with children. And it's not even sarcastic question, but actual, genuine curiosity.

"For once," Tenzō says, "this is not my fault. I kept quiet."

"I know," Kakashi growls and glances at the purple-haired woman, sitting atop the lockers and practically radiating smugness.

"Is there any problem?" the woman – Yugao, if he remembers correctly, she's the one who found Sasuke after Massacre – asks with a very, very smug smile.

"No, not at all," Tenzō brushes off with a smile, and tugs his senior away, so maybe, just maybe, today in Headquarters will not end in brawl. Even if Kakashi never starts them, Tenzō is not sure it wouldn't change today.

---

She awakes to Sasuke, clinging to her for dear life, face nuzzled in the crook of her neck and fists gripping her oversized shirt-turned-pajama. Sasuke himself is still deeply asleep and Ren actually sighs in relief. He's calm, which can mean one thing; he isn't having yet another one of his nightmares.

(God damn you, Itachi.)

It's Saturday morning, so she only sighs, and closes her eyes again. She's already used to getting up at six (which wasn't difficult to achieve), but today is free, so she hardly thinks she will be up before ten. Getting up before ten during the weekend was inhumane, at the very least.

"Nee-san," Sasuke mutters into her collar, shifting a little, and then mumbles something complexly incoherent.

"It's okay, squirt," she whispers into his hair. "Sleep, we don't have school today."

He mumbles again and nods so slightly, that wasn't good portion of his head touching her directly, Ren wouldn't have even known. But, what becomes apparent to her, even he likes to sleep in sometimes.

As for Ren… Each time she closes her eyes for longer, she re-lives memories of the original Uchiha girl. It had become frequent static in her current life, and she doesn't even bother fighting it. Why in the first place? Those dreams of memories are her only source of information on her predecessor's actual life.

Spoiler: original Uchiha Ren was a mean, up tact little shit who just knew everything better. Kind of like pre-chūnin Neji, just… Mean…er. And so full of herself, she could burst any moment. Because she was an Uchiha, because she awakened her sharingan early, because she mastered the Grand Fireball. It was annoying, really, to Ren(ee). Also, the original didn't seem to get along with anyone. Didn't even try to, so assured that she's better, rarely speaking and thus appearing cool and aloof to bystanders.

Wrong.

And here she thought she was the antisocial one. Well, it happens, and Renee couldn't bring herself to feel bad about replacing the girl. Not anymore. It was still weird, wearing someone else's skin (which was whole foot, if not more, shorter than what she was used to), though.

But then, better this way than dead.

---

"Sasuke, is this my shirt?"

"Mhm."

"Why are you wearing it then, if it's mine?"

"Because I like it."

"Don't you have your own clothing?"

"Hn," he just Uchihas at Ren, crossing his hands on his chest and looks at the girl in almost daring manner, but refuses to answer whatsoever.

"Aa," she Uchihas right back, mimicking his pose and narrowing her eyes. They stay like that, staring at each other for a while, when Sasuke eventually gives up, after what feels like eternity.

"It has your scent," he admits, soft shade of pink gracing his cheeks. "I like your scent. It makes me feel better. Like… Like he isn't going to come after me any second. Or after you," he looks up at her with those big eyes, as black as the void itself, and Ren sighs, ruffling his hair affectionately.

"That's why we train, you know," she says, kneeling before him. "So when he comes, we can kick his ass. How about that?"

"I'm going to kill him," Sasuke says, his demeanor change so sudden from the embarrassed child to revenge-driven madman that Ren almost takes a step back.

"No," she says firmly, grabbing his small hands into her, not much bigger ones. "We are going to intercept the bastard. And then explain to him that what he did was so undeniably, completely idiotic- And that committing suicide through his younger brother's hands is not a way to go. Alright?"

Sasuke blinks at her, surprised, and asks; "suicide?"

"Why else would he want you to kill him?" she asks, and doesn't even have to feign surprise in her voice. Sasuke told her exactly what happened not even a week after they first meet, and she's been thinking out a way of getting him out of his revenge ever since. In all honesty, she was the only person Sasuke opened to after the Massacre. But, well, shared blood does that to some.

"I… Uh… I don't know," boy admits solemnly, all hate fleeting from his features, much to Ren's relief. "I just… I don't know, nee-san."

"It's okay, squirt," she sighs, patting his head. "I'm here for you, remember? And your friends are, too. Naruto, Kiba, Hana-"

"Hana is your friend," he winces his nose.

"Yes, and because of that, she is also yours," Ren chuckles. "Now, how about we do some taijutsu practice? I know it's about time you start going through basic katas-"

"They're easy and boring," Sasuke sniffs.

"-and I know they're nothing. So, I'm going to teach you some more advanced stuff. How about that?"

"Okay, but breakfast first," he says, looking at Ren expectantly, and she chuckles.

"Don't worry, I'll make you your salad," she smiles.

(She lets Sasuke wear her shirt in the end. It looks like a dress on him, too long, too loose, but he doesn't mind, so she just brushes it off.)

---

They catch her by absolute surprise, really, those brats. Honestly, she hasn't suspected a thing, and the execution of their plan is as flawless as it could get for a bunch of kids. It's simple, really – Sasuke and Naruto avert her attention from what is happening (though there, really, is no need, she would hardly expect it even if it hit her in the face, this kind of situation), and Hana orchestrates everything.

At first, she doesn't know what to do. Why is it happening. For her it's another day, another date, the same as every other.

Not for them, apparently.

So, when bunch of people jump up from literally everywhere in the living room of Hokage Estate, yelling atop of their lungs 'Happy Birthday Ren', she's really, sincerely caught off-guard. Shocked, even, because, really-

It's the second of March. Her thirty-second birthday, and twelfth as well.

And Ren… Ren doesn't know what to do. It's been years since she stopped celebrating yet another year of her life passing by, and those big parties with tons of kids, and a cake, and everything? Yeah. Those she has ever seen only in television, in movies. She never even thought that they were actually real, as she never participated in one, or even heard about someone having it. Up until now.

And it's not only kids who greet her, no. There's Genma, of course, and the Hokage, too, and his family – his daughter and Konohamaru, because Asuma really is away and training – and somewhere in the corner there are also Kakashi and Tenzo, still clad in ANBU uniforms and all, but somehow less sneaky this one time. And, of course, a horde of small children. Kiba, Sakura, Choji, Shikamaru. And Naruto with Sasuke, holding her hands one each, one with big grin and the other with a faint imitation of smile that isn't a smirk, and she's absolutely speechless.

"Holy fuck," she manages, because this is the best birthday party she has ever had in her life and it hasn't even began. "Holy fucking fuck," because there are more people in the room than she thought it was possible to have positive relationship with.

"And here she is," Genma snorts, senbon clicking between his teeth. "Our beloved, flowery-mouthed birthday girl."

Ren doesn't even bother to pretend being offended.

"No, it's just… I've never had a birthday like this, ever," she admits honestly. "Actually, no. I never even cared at all, so- Well. I kind of forgot that I have birthday today? I didn't intend to celebrate it, really. But- But I appreciate. I really do. And damn, old man, don't you have, like, shit ton of paperwork to do?"

"I do," Sarutobi Hiruzen smiles, "but I do believe I can spare few minutes or so for your birthday. But true, I must soon depart to the tower to take care of all that… Gracious… Paperwork."

"Why you don't do birthdays?!" Naruto shrieks, hanging himself on her hand almost tripping her to the side wasn't it for Sasuke latched at the other. Boy looks at her with those wide, wide sky-blue eyes in shock, and Ren just sighs.

"I never saw the point, you know" she admits honestly. The Archers – her family, or people that she should feel were her family, but she hardly does – never made a big deal out of it. Or maybe she was just a special case, because birthdays and name days of all her uncles and aunts usually tended to be such a big deal.

"But you'll play with us, right?" Sakura asks, eyes wide and hopeful, and Ren would really like to say no, just because, but she can't. Because she's a kid again, and suddenly she can have all those things she never had before.

"Yeah," she agrees instead. "Yeah, I'll play with you."

And so she does. Because she's the birthday girl today, and the world seems like it hates her a little less (actually, it seems like this ever since she woken up as Ren, two decades younger and with actual possibility of future, and no orthodox family to drag her down each step).

She's on the verge of crying, in all honesty, when they all wish her happy birthday and give gifts, and share cake and laugh. There's that pressure tightening her throat, hot and unyielding, and she has hard time fighting it. But she manages, in the end – barely, but she manages.

Konohamaru with his mom give her a cookbook with various recipes. It's something that will be of use a lot in later date, since Ren already started taking over the kitchen when preparation of her and Sasuke's meals is in question.

Sakura gets her a necklace, custom made, obviously, a glossy piece of metal resembling a fan, Uchiha-painted and hanged on rather short chain. Just fine to be tucked under her turtleneck and remain there.

Shikamaru and Choji, apparently not knowing her long or good enough and unsure on what to give, just settle in with regular sweets. dango, Uchiha-predisposed food (much like Uzumaki and ramen) however prove to be a good bet. There is more than a dozen different flavors, she notes, and they might have actually went on and bought her every single flavor.

Sarutobi gives her a scroll on basic fire techniques with a motion and aura she always wished her grandfather would show more. But she'll take this, and the scroll, and if the way Sarutobi flinches at her almost-sadistic enthusiasm about burning things with ninja magic, well.

Kakashi, perhaps out of spite, perhaps because he's just a shit like that, actually gives her a wallet with a piece of paper inside. 'Start making your own and stop leeching off of me, you little piece of shit. Love, Hound.' it says, and Ren perhaps should feel offended, because it was only once- But she's just amused instead.

Tenzō gives her weights. They're not that heavy, but a start, and he just hit the jackpot, because Ren hasn't really thought about them up until now. But wearing those all the time? That was going to improve her strength and speed like a magical spell and she straps them on her hands and legs right on.

Kiba and Hana actually buy her a glass tank, fully equipped and all, and decorate it with something that resembles a small forest with a plaque that says 'Do not disturb the spider'. Ren is honestly amused, and Awai takes instant liking to his new home and refuses to leave it for the remaining time of the day.

Naruto gives her a plushie, and Ren has hard time fighting a snort, because it's a blue llama with a pink ribbon around its neck. But she accepts it gratefully, because she's always loved plush toys, only never truly managed to get herself to collect them like she wanted. He tells her that he bought it himself, and Ren can't help but wonder just how much that means. For the boy to go to the toy store, just to get something for her. Into the place where everyone makes it widely known that he's not wanted. And she's grateful for him for that he did, for her.

Genma gives her additional set of basic ninja tools, for which she's grateful, because one can't have too many kunai, and gloves. But not just any gloves – those are hardened on knuckles with wire-induced fiber, and metal plaque on the outer sides of palm, with whirly symbol of the Leaf engraved, and if Ren's smile grows even more sadistic, he doesn't comment, or about how lovingly she slips them on. Genma is just so nice, that he pretends that he totally doesn't wonder about how many jaws is she going to break with those.

Sasuke brings her a katana, and not just an ordinary one. It's a heirloom, that much is obvious, and it's something Sasuke fearlessly waltzed into the compound for yesterday. She knows, because he asked Tenzō if the man couldn't take him there to get something. And the sword itself? It's amazing, really, well-crafted and thrumming with unspoken power. A blade that has been in family for years, pale blade, almost white, singing with every move. Black handle and cherry-colored sheath with a motif of a dragon on it.

And then she runs and plays with other kids up until the night falls, and then plays some more, and she's actually, genuinely happy. It feels great, to be a kid again, to gang on Genma and watch the Tokujo allow himself to be caught and found repeatedly. To spin the kids around just for screams of pure glee.

They even manage to drag Tenzō and Kakashi – who does it very, very reluctantly – into their game of hide and seek, and, actually, Naruto is the one who somehow never fails to find the two, even if they cheat and hide around ANBU-style.

That's… Amazing feat, honestly.

In the end, Ren is happy. Like, very happy, ridiculously so, giddy and tired, but that day was really, really well-spent, and maybe, just maybe, she's going to like the idea of birthday.

But with those gifts she got? She's going to put them into a damn good use on her way of becoming one woman army, a frontline heavy-hitter that as much as mention of whose will give enemy a second thoughts, starting yesterday.

Graduation is in two months, and she can't wait.

(She doesn't even know yet, or begin to realize, but she's been on her way of becoming the ninja equivalent of Boogeyman ever since she made up her mind on changing the fate.)