I’m such a stupid idiot, Steph thought, tears streaming down her cheeks.   I just cheated on Andrew... dammit I mean Alley!   What the hell was I thinking?   Why did he kiss me?  Why did I kiss him?!  She didn’t want to admit it to herself, but Stephanie realized she wasn’t thinking - she was reacting to raw attraction - and that she felt an honest attraction to Billy - and still felt it to Alley.   How did this happen?  She asked herself.  I care about Andrew, even if his recent change to Alley happened.  How the hell does Billy fit into all of this - aside from being handsome.  And charming... dammit.   She tried to ignore her thoughts, but visions of Billy kept floating in front of her mental eye, making her feel more and more guilty.  I need to talk to Alley, she thought.   At least tell her what I did before she hears it from anyone else.  I’m such a shit... I wouldn’t be surprised if she dumps me.   Fear and stress raged through Stephanie as she walked back towards the city of Trondheim.

 

*              *              *

 

Billy hit his head off the steering wheel one more time.  “Stupid asshole.”  He said to himself.  “You know they’re in a relationship.  You KNOW that.  Why did you do something so stupid?”   You know damn well why, he thought.  You’re so fucking lonely that you can’t breathe at night and it hurts so much your bones ache, and ever since you met Stephanie and Andrew you’ve been worried that bitch Groa might have been right after all...  “If I ever get that son of a bitch who got me killed in my sights, he’s fucking dead.”

 

Billy sighed, running his fingers through his hair.  Dammit, this is my fault - not hers.  You know what kind of effect you have on the ladies, Billy!  And with the emotional roller coaster she’s been going through, it was a dirty fucking move...   But dear god, I never expected her to nearly suck my face off kissing back!   She must feel something!   Billy sighed again, and put the car in gear.  I’d better look for Stephanie, then get back to the hotel.  No matter what happens, there’s going to be a shitstorm.  Billy said.   He nudged the car into traffic, and headed back to their hotel.   He kept an eye out for Stephanie - they needed to talk.

 

A few minutes later, he caught up to Stephanie, still walking along the shoulder of the road.  He pulled up alongside her, and lowered the window.   “Hey Stephanie - get in!”  He called.  She didn’t react the first time, so he called again.  “C’mon - get in the car, Steph!”

 

Steph turned and looked at Billy with anger - but almost immediately tempered her looks with regret.  “I’m not in the mood to talk, Billy.”  She replied.   “It might be better if you went without me.”

 

“It’ll be easier to be mad at me if you’re dry and at the hotel.”  Billy said, mostly not joking.   “I shouldn’t have kissed you when you’re committed to Alley.  It was a shit thing to do...  Would you please get inside – I’ve got like eight cars pulling up behind me.”   It was probably more like six, Billy thought - but it was hard to count when he was driving and looking at Stephanie.

 

Stephanie sighed and relented, realizing she could brood - and apologize - while dry, or she could do it tired and wet.   “We need to talk.”  She said, getting in to the cars passenger seat.

 

“No shit.”  Billy said, sadly.  “I’ve got something to tell the both of you once we get back to the hotel.”  If I don’t chicken out like a coward, he thought to himself.  After all the crap I’ve taken from the other Einherjar over the last five years from what Groa the seer told me, no wonder I’m nervous.  I always wished she was wrong, but now I don’t think she was.

 

“Billy, I don’t know why you kissed me - but what you did wasn’t a shit thing - it was just a thing.  I did a shit thing by kissing you back...  I cheated on Alley.   I don’t understand why - but I feel torn between you both, and I don’t know why either.   It’s confusing as fuck, and I just pray Alley doesn’t dump me outright.”   Stephanie looked as if she feared the worst.

 

Billy nodded, knowing anything he said would probably only make it worse.   The two drove back to the hotel in silence.

Billy kept his eyes on the road, trying to not glance over a Stephanie, who was fretting and staring out her window.  Smooth move, idiot.  He thought.  What are you going to do if Alley does dump her?  He asked himself. 

 

*              *              *

 

Thorn shook his head in frustration... “No, mistress - not like that!  If you do that, you’ll expend your energy but have little to no effect.  Listen to the sound of the Green.   Feel it with your skin, your eyes - you have to feel it.  It just happens - you don’t have to try so hard.”

 

“I AM trying, Thorn.”  Alley said, a little frustrated.  “I’m not used to this stuff - and I am trying.”   Alley was sitting at a table in their hotel room, with a potted plant - a spider plant - in front of her.  This afternoon’s lesson was talk to the plant - and so far it was NOT going well.  At least breathing water went better than this – I’d have needed resuscitation if I’d screwed that up.  Alley grinned - learning these magic tricks was hard, but it was pretty cool all the same.   So far she’d learned to breathe water like Aquaman, and learned how to protect herself from falling debris and being buried alive... Rose called the ability ‘Safely Interred’ - which sounded like a really fancy way of saying not getting crushed to death by rocks and dirt.

 

“So, what should happen when I get this to work again?”  Alley asked.

 

“You should be able to speak with it.”  Stump said in his baritone voice.  “It can tell you who was in here last, and all sorts of things.  People rarely watch what they’re doing in front of a plant.  The same idea works if you can talk to cats or dogs - no one keeps their tongue held in front of the family cat.  It’s amazing what plants and animals see - you can get a lot of useful information from them.  Plus plants are nice people.”

 

Alley smiled, and patted Stump on the head.  “Yes they are, Stump.  Yes they are.”

 

“Are you ready to try again, Mistress Alley?”  Thorn asked.

 

“Sure - might as well give it a try.”   Alley turned her thoughts to the plant, opened up her mind and just... listened.  It was faint at first - it sounded like music to her - but then it took on a more coherent tone, and she began to recognize words.  “I think I’m getting it - I can hear words, but I can’t make them out.”

 

“Good, Mistress.”  Thorn said.  “Try listening closer.”

 

Alley turned her attention to the spider-plant once more, and focussed on what it was saying - or trying to say.  Slowly, she began to make out its words... 

 

“Hello?  Hello?  Did you say something?”  it asked.

 

“Yeah - Sweet!  I figured it out!  Hey plant!”  Alley called out.

 

“Hey yourself - what do you want?”  The spider-plant asked.

 

“See anything interesting in this room lately?”

 

“Aside from five sprites?  Depends – I’ve seen some weird stuff in this room.  There was a while six months ago when the room was rented by four people for an orgy - that was weird.  They were rubbing their pistils and stamens all over everything - sap was everywhere - yuck!   I’ve seen a person get murdered in here - that was weird.  I guess it depends.  A lot of what you people do is weird for us plants.”

 

I don’t want to ask it to clarify what it just said.  It sounds like one of those questions you don’t want the answer to.  “You’ve seen someone get killed here?”  Alley was just amazed she could talk to plants at all - the fact they had stuff to actually say was pretty damn amazing!  

 

“Yup.”  The spider plant said.  “It was messy.  The police found the victim the next morning...  I knew what the killer looked like, but nobody asked me.”  The spider plant almost looked glum at that.  “I would have told them, no problem - but it’s been so long since I’ve had someone to chat with.  I thought people talking to us was a fairy tale.”

               

Alley snorted.  “I think you’re right - I thought it was a fairy tale a few days ago too.  Don’t worry about it.” The Spider plant agreed, and lapsed into silence.

 

Rose smiled.  “I think you’ve got it, Mistress.  What do you think Thorn?”

 

“I agree.”  Thorn said.  “Why don’t we take five minutes to break, and then well teach you that hypnotic command spell that Hariko used on you, and Sif used on Stephanie.”

 

“Sounds good.”  Alley cackled.  “Oh the fun I’ll have with that power...”  Her mind tittered in anticipation - she was finding she was more than a little bit of a prankster these days.   Maybe it came from having fewer inhibitions, she wondered.   Her reverie was broken by the door to the hotel suite opening, and a distraught, wet and bedraggled Stephanie and an equally distraught Billy came into the room, Billy closing the door behind them.  

 

“What’s wrong, you two?   You look like someone ran over your puppy.”  Alley asked.

 

Stephanie stopped, and hung her head.  “Alley... I screwed up.   Billy and I were talking, and he kissed me - and I kissed him back.”

 

Alley looked at her, a little confused.  ... And?  So she kissed him?   “I’m not thrilled, but why the long faces?”

 

“And that’s it - I shouldn’t have done it.  I’m sorry - please forgive me.”  Stephanie looked like her world was about to collapse.  Compared to Alleys reaction so far, it seemed silly.

 

Alley just stared at Steph.   What!?  Is that all? She asked herself. She must be really upset about this...  “Is there something more, hon?”  She asked.  Maybe there was something more, she realized.   Maybe Steph didn’t want her anymore, now that she was Alley.

 

Stephanie nodded.   “It’s an attraction - I don’t know how it happened, but I’ve been attracted to him - and it just boiled over.  I can’t explain it.   I love you, Alley - and I don’t know what I’m feeling about Billy, and I don’t want to screw us up.”   Stephanie looked truly chagrined, and very upset.

 

Alley heard the words, and breathed a sigh of relief.   It’s not me – it’s something else.   What the hell is her problem – it’s just a kiss!   So she likes Billy - no biggie - I never thought I was into guys and I’ve been noticing the guy the last few days too.   If I don’t do something to shake her out of this pity party, she’ll never calm the hell down.

 

“So.  So what?   You kissed.   It’s not the end of the world.   I’ve noticed myself wanting to kiss him the last few days, myself.”   Alley grinned.   “I’ve had to change my underwear more than once, in fact – I’m definitely not used to being around a handsome guy right now.   No worries.   I’m just glad you still love me.   Stop apologizing - but thank you for telling me.”

 

Stephanie stared.  “How can you be so blasé about this?”  She asked.   “I practically sucked Billy’s face off we kissed so hard.   Doesn’t that bother you?”

 

“No... Do you want it to?”  Alley responded.  “You seem like you want me to be outraged.  I’m not.   I’m a little confused where this came from, but I’m not pissed off.   Billy’s a handsome guy - and any woman would be odd to not be into him a little, if they liked guys at all.   We’ve been working closely for days - weeks almost - and it’s kind of natural wed be drawn to one another.   Still, I could be angry if you preferred, I suppose.”

 

Stephanie looked a little calmer.  “I don’t understand why you’re not worried or upset - but I am glad.   Why are you forgiving me so easily, hon?”

 

Alley gulped.  It’s now or never, she thought.  In three steps she strode over to Billy, grabbed him behind the head, and pulled him down to kiss her.  She kissed him back enthusiastically, until a very surprised Billy pulled away from Alley.   It was the first time Alley had kissed a guy - it was kind of nice.  Not like with Stephanie - she didn’t really count as a guy in Alleys mind anyway, except by technicality.   Billy smelled nice - like Old Spice, and as she kissed she felt butterflies in her stomach, like the first time she and Stephanie kissed.   She wasn’t sure what that meant, but it could wait for later.

 

“What the hell was that?!”  He asked, equally confused.

 

“A kiss.  Was it that bad?”  Alley asked.

 

“What?  No!  Why did you kiss me?”  Billy asked, sputtering.

 

“Ummm....  Cause you’re handsome, I wanted to, and I wanted to show Stephanie it’s okay.”  She turned to Stephanie.  “It is okay, you know - as long as Billy doesn’t mind.   I know you love me - and I love you - so unless that has changed, which I’m sure you’d tell me, I don’t worry about it.”

 

Stephanie didn’t know what to say.  She likes Billy.  She loves me.  She’s kissing men.  “What the hell has happened to you, Alley?”  Steph sat on the edge of the hotel bed, a little stunned by the developments.  “I was expecting to get yelled at - told how evil I was - not get told no worries and have you kiss Billy too.  What the hell is going on?   I’m a little confused, hon.”

 

“So am I, Steph.”  Alley said.  “What brought all this on - why did Billy kiss you in the first place?”  She turned to Billy.  “Why did you kiss her in the first place, Billy?”

 

Billy surprised them both by looking actually afraid for a moment - like a deer caught in the headlights.  He visibly steeled himself, and took the plunge.  “It’s because of a prophecy - a vision - an ancient seeress told me when I first reached Valhalla - when I died, and became an Einherjar.   She said I would be alone until I met my true loves - plural - and that they would both be men.   I didn’t believe it at first, but ever since I’ve met you - both of you – I’ve been falling in love with you both.   I love you both - and it’s killing me that I upset you, that I might drive the two of you apart.”  Tears were rolling down his cheeks as Billy continued.   “I don’t know what to do about it either - I don’t want to break you up - I just can’t help how I feel.   Maybe you should send me away - back to Valhalla, Stephanie.  Get me out of your life - ask for someone else.”

 

Petal, who until this point had been silent, flew over to Billy and gave him a hug with her tiny hands.  “Don’t be sad, Billy.”  She said.  “It’s okay... isn’t it mistress?”

 

Alley stared in surprise - the last thing she had expected was a declaration of love - and from the look Stephanie had, she hadn’t expected it either.  She looked at Steph, then at Billy.  Please understand what I’m trying to do here, she thought to Stephanie, and then walked over and gave Billy (and Petal, still on his shoulder) a big hug.

 

Stephanie, like Alley had guessed was equally stunned by Billy’s admission of love.  He loves us?  BOTH of us?   And now he wants me to send him away?   What the...?   Steph thought a moment, and realized she didn’t want to send Billy away.  Sure - he was annoying, aggravating, and sometimes silly and childish - but he was also brave, strong, and a good friend.  He opened his heart to me earlier - and I...  I felt something too.   I don’t know if I’m making a big mistake - or what Alley is doing, but he’s a friend.  He needs us.  She came over and hugged Billy too. 

 

The three of them stayed locked in a desperate hug for some time, the silence only broken when Stump and Thistle flew over, poking the three of them to see if they were still awake.   Their antics earned some laughter, and soon the tension was broken, and the three friends sat down to sort out this difficult emotional mess.

 

*              *              *

 

Hours later, after much discussion and a ho-hum takeout meal, Billy, Alley and Stephanie had sort of figured out what was going on between them... and laughed more than a little when the sprites compared it to one of the daytime soap operas.   Alley and Stephanie loved each other - that had not changed - and Alley was attracted to men now as well, and liked Billy.  Steph had always like both men and women - but was attracted strongly to Billy - and Billy was falling in love with both Alley and Stephanie at the same time.   The only thing all three of them agreed on fully was that they didn’t know what the hell to do about it right now - so they mutually decided to put it aside until after Stephanie’s trial...  Distractions like this could get all three of them killed.   They headed to bed, after discussing the battle plan for the next day - and drifted off to sleep, more than a little confused.   The sprites did their best to mediate between the lovestruck humans, and took turns standing guard over their Mistress and her two friends.   It was a quiet night.  One way or another, Stephanie’s trial would end tomorrow...