CW:

Spoiler

Not much. a touch of self-harm talk and worry about returning to abusers.

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No. NO! This… they… But…

 

“Hey… hey! Lyra, It’s alright. ” Awnya coos soft comforts while holding me so tight. “No one’s going anywhere, and this plan isn’t set.”

 

That… helps stop my spiral. End my furious and sudden terror as I pull her soul ever closer. Incredibly careful but… also needing to feel the truth in those last words.

 

“I… C– can s– s– say n– no?” Is all I can whisper.

 

“Yeah… And we’re going to trust you.” Awnya says.

 

“No.” I reply instantly.

 

She sighs but… nods. “Alright, but… can we talk out the whys? Decide this together?”

 

I pause at that, pull her arms closer and up to nibble at wrists and fingers and savor the taste and texture and warmth of her skin as I consider her request.

 

So stupid. Risking this. But… but while I beat back the weird Fuzzy Fae that… that took time and… and what if another one appears? What if they don’t stop bubbling up and getting stronger and… and I never get to hold Tretion or our Children ever again!?!

 

“Oke.” I finally murmur. “Wh– whys?”

 

“Firstly, She may very well be one of the safest options.” Tretion starts. “She, more than anyone else, has worked very hard to keep you loyal to her.”

 

A well kept tool.

 

“Which… That’s why I think she helped us in the Fae Wood.” Awnya chimes in. “That’s why she didn’t try and force her way here. I would have fought if she tried. She knows that if anything happened to me you’d never forgive her.”

 

Blighted by my Beloved’s love.

 

“B– but… Wh– what if sh– she h– hurts you?” I whisper. “O– or… or k– keep t– till I g– go back?”

 

Tretion tilts her head and tendrils. “How would she keep you after you returned? You’re stronger than ever now. And… if she did hurt Awnya or I could you ever really forgive her?”

 

I wince as… as such horrid fantasy’s drift through my mind's eye. Of Tretion hurt and broken or… or worse…

 

No. No I would… would… I’m not sure. But forgiveness wouldn’t be an option.

 

I shiver and shake my head.

 

“B– but… Sh– she… I… j– just…” I stammer quietly, then finally whisper. “Y– you hate h– her.”

 

Tretion nods, and Awnya’s soul thrums in obvious agreement as she chimes. “Yeah. Of course.”

 

A pause, and somehow Tretion just… understands the worry I have festering.

 

“Lyra…” She whispers. “I mean to simply speak with her. Will gain Oaths like she gave when I first met you to ensure things remain peaceful. And as much as I’d like for my own barbed insults to wound… I doubt rousing her to anger is a thing I could do.”

 

“H– how g– get t– to tell things?” I ask.

 

“Trades.” Awnya picks up. “There are a lot of valuable things here. Books and treasures and the like.”

 

I consider that. All the… the little oddities Thendra collected over the years. Often prizes for the things she had me do. The… the souls she had me Reave.

 

Awnya squeezes me tighter, sensing my darker thoughts.

 

“B– but…” I murmur, gently latching teeth once again into my Fae Beloved’s wrist. “Wh– What if only w– want m– m– me?”

 

Or worse… What if she doesn’t?

 

“Then… I leave. And my earlier words hold true.” Tretion shrugs easily, then pauses in thoughtful considerations before slowly continuing. “Lyra… I think… If I had to guess that Reaver is very old. Which is odd for a soul drinker, and why even my grandmother thought her nothing but a young beast. Sorts such as her don’t last very long, but when they do… it's for a reason.”

 

[The cost of tearing fire from the Dream and infesting yourself with all their Blights.] Comes a soft murmur from…

 

I very nearly jerk as I curl around my Awnya to regard the lump nuzzled in the corner. She… She’s healed. Looks and feels better than she did when I woke to her wounded and scared. Still roils with annoyance and hatred for me but… hasn’t attacked or talked or like… done anything!

 

Just watched.

 

“Wh– what?” I murmur.

 

A single sandy eye peeks out from the bundle. But she does not repeat herself.

 

“Lyra?” Awnya asks, “Did… Did that spirit talk?”

 

I nod and… try my best to repeat her words.

 

“Yes.” Tretion nods, tendrils swaying in both worry and interest as she turns to regard the space she thinks the spirit huddles in. “And that’s what worries me. For a thing to survive as long as she had after feasting, means that she either has a way to stave off any illnesses or ailments from the act, is immune, or… simply bears them.”

 

Awnya huffs. “Would explain why she’s such a cunt.”

 

I watch the Fae spirit for a reply but… she only turns away and nuzzles deeper into her fuzzy pile.

 

“Did she…” Awnya prompts after a moment.

 

I shake my head.

 

“That’s alright.” Tretion states instantly. “Thank you for your words. I… I would be more than willing to extend to you whatever hospitalities of this Manor I can offer, if you’ll claim the same as our guest.”

 

A surprised flutter but… still no more words. Just… a thrumming of weary fear and pain.

 

“Let us know if she says anything else. There’s no rush.” Awnya adds.

 

I nod and turn back to face our beloved Watcher.

 

“Did she ever tell you how she does that? Handles the burden or washes off the consequences?” Awnya asks.

 

I think on that, then shake my head. “Sh– she didn’t c– consume o– others m– m– much. O– only…”

 

Me.

 

Our Watcher can’t suppress the flutter of sadness and worry. “Did she ever talk elsewise about what she wanted from you? Both in the long or short term?”

 

“J– just…” I whisper. “N– no. J– just K– k– k–k–”

 

Kept me.

 

She nods. Understanding so easily. “Alright. Then… While this isn’t the most preferable path, it avoided parlaying with Fae. They… Well after that huntress ambushed Awnya I think any hope of peace with them is long past. Thendra is the enemy of our enemy. She only gains from peaceful talks with me.”

 

I bite my lip and look away. Sea-bed writhing in worry and fear and… and…

 

Dreamer’s Tits I… I…

 

“And… wh– what if F– Fae a– attack again?”

 

Tretion smiles a bit darkly at that. “No Fae song will enchant or ensoul me again, beloved. If a huntress appears like one did with Awnya… Well, she’ll find us prepared. I will burn anyone to ash who would keep me from returning or attempting to follow.”

 

Awnya tenses but… nods. “Yeah, that… They should know better. But after what Thendra did to that Huntress you’ll need to be extra careful. I hope that was enough to scare them off but… I didn’t even know Fae like that existed.”

 

“And if Thendra fought something that horrid off once before she’ll no doubt be ready to do it again.” Tretion adds.

 

I… Would you? I think at the shard within my soul. Please? K– keep them both safe?

 

“And the plan would be to avoid Theradas and all Rifts they may know we might frequent. Send messages through allies and proxies to organize a meeting on neutral ground. Probably a Blighted Rift.” Our Watcher continues.

 

“Yup, The Fae will avoid those places, and Tretion will have Raska with her to battle back any Rot once they arrive.” Awnya agrees.

 

I wince and look away. Stare at the fuzzy Fae napping in the corner.

 

“B– but… D– don’t want t– to… to lose you.” I whisper. “E– either of you.”

 

“You won’t.” Tretion whispers softly, “Never again. I will keep my promises to you. Will burn anything and everything between us. But… Nor will I let this mantle hurt you while I’m still able to help. Thendra will give me answers, then I will return to you.”

 

“A– and… if no r– return?” I turn my most serious look on her. “W– will c– come find y–you. N– not Awnya. M– me.”

 

They both go still at that.

 

“Oke?” I press. “I a– agree to th– this, b– but if d– don’t c– come b– back then… th– en I Br– bring you b– back.”

 

“Beloved, I…” Our Watcher stammers, tendrils all a mess. “That’s not…”

 

“Yeah no, that’s a no from me.” Our Fae chuckles. “If something happens and Tretion and Raska don’t make it back when expected we’re both going out. Together. Nothing in the Rifts or beyond will stop us from bringing you back, love.”

 

I can’t stop the grin that bubbles up as I let myself fall back into my wonderful Fae and her support in this.

 

“I… fine. Yes.” Tretion huffs, “Of course. I’d not want either of you alone out there, especially with our young, but… nor would I want any of us to be alone. Never again. Would… and…”

 

A pause, and our wonderful Fae’s soul alights with Inspiration.

 

Tretion catches whatever it is in her eyes and freezes. “No.”

 

“Why not?” Awnya counters.

 

“For… for dozens of reasons!” Tretion stammers.

 

“Alright, then lay them out to us.” Our Fae presses.

 

“Wh– what?” I twist to look between them.

 

Tretion sighs and falls back to sitting back a bit. Regards us both.

 

“Do you trust her… or don’t you?” Awnya whispers softly. “If the answer is no then I can respect that.”

 

“It’s less a matter of trust and more… more a matter of…” Tretion trails off. Openly glaring at a far wall.

 

“I know love.” Awnya murmurs. “But… I think it kinda needs to happen that way. It’s… we’re a family. And if making sure one of us comes home means everyone else needs to take on some risks I… I hate that we need to. Sure. But I would honestly face all the horrors in the Dream with you both by my side than see one of you lost to me.”

 

And then I get it.

 

“A– all g– go?” I whisper.

 

“Yup. That’s what I’m thinking is best now.” Awnya nods.

 

Tretion winces. “I just… Lyra I…” She takes a deep and shaky breath. “I’m afraid. Not that… that we’d be attacked. We could handle that. Easily. But…”

 

She trails off, and looks back to me.

 

“A– afraid I’ll w– want t– to g– go b– b– back.” I huff, and nod. “Y– yeah. S– sorry. I… W– want to. K– kind of. N– not always. Not as m– much. B– but won’t. W– want to st– ay w– with y– you b– both m– more. K– keep J– jellyfish s– safe.”

 

Awnya leans into me. “This… this is gonna hurt. I think. A lot. But I think you can do it. Can tell her no if she asks or… or demands you return. Especially with us there. With your children close.”

 

I take a deep breath and nod. “H– hard. B– but… w– want to d– do this.”

 

Our Watcher’s eyes bubble with tears. “Were it so easy? Lyra I… I know what it is to have someone who hurt you endlessly, attempt to lure you back with but the barest showing of affection. Can understand just… how helpless we can become beneath that, and that’s with myself knowing very much that I did not suffer as you did.”

 

All I…

 

No.

 

No, I deserve this.

 

Them. This happiness.

 

Right?

 

“I kn– know. B– but pr– promi– mised. W– want th– this. W– will c– come b– back.” I reach out to touch the edge of the barrier. “C– can tr– trust me? Pl– please? L– let m– me keep s– safe.”

 

“And what if another spirit attacks or… or rises up at the wrong moment?” She pleads, leaning forward to touch her hand to the other side.

 

“Th– then y– you bo– both k– k– keep Jellyfish safe.” I lean forward, “A– and I h– handle it. B– better to d– do b– before g– get bad. F– fuzzy Sp–spirit won’t att–tack. N– not again.”

 

A pause, and I can see it. See her about to say no.

 

“A– and… Need t– to s– say things…” I whisper. “T– tell Th– th– Thendra g– goodbye.”

 

In person. See how she reacts to that and… thank you for… for finding me in those woods. But… I don’t tell her that part.

 

She nods, slowly. “I… But we’ll need to lay things out. Meet on neutral ground and… prepare more magic items and spells and…” She pauses tendrils writhing in more pointed worry. “I… I still want Raska to be with us.”

 

I repress my own urge to wince, instead nod with more confidence than I know I have. “Y– yes. O– oke. G– good t– to h– have h– her.”

 

“Would…” Awnya murmurs. “Okay, Dreamer Tits, let’s… We should probably call her into this then.”

 

A pause passes.

 

“Are you comfortable with that, love?” Tretion murmurs. “I need to free her from the Oaths so we can all talk and share openly. I’ll ask her to… stay on task. Avoid talking about your past together?”

 

I nod. “Oke.”

 

Raska arrives quickly. Moves to stand close but remains silent. The core of her flame dancing in anticipation and curiosity.

 

Our Watcher turns and smiles softly. “Have a seat?”

 

Raska hesitates, but nods. Sliding down to sit but, back still. At a distance.

 

“We’ve talked some things over and… decided on some changes.” Tretion begins. “Big ones. We’ve… decided that none of us are willing to face a future where someone we love doesn’t come home. So… we mean to make this outing together. All together.”

 

The Spark between her horns dances as she takes that in, glimmering eyes drifting between her and Awnya and myself. Amwella suddenly all wiggling with disparate thoughts and feelings and… honestly more than I can spot. Much less understand.

 

“Which… means we need to make additional plans and preparations. And… for them I’d like to free you from this Oath of silence when in the presence of my Beloved.”

 

She goes stiff at that. Face twisting into a mess as her soul splits between such odd angers and hope and worries.

 

“But… with a few requests.” Tretion murmurs softly. “We’d like to keep these talks on task, alright? Avoid… topics of past events unless they pertain to this outing?”

 

Raska swallows, nods. Amwella even more divided but… solidifying into pained acceptance.

 

“Alright, then… Duenna Raska of the Everflames, I free you from your Oaths of silence.”

 

An odd…. Swirl wibbles through Raska's soul. Causing her to shiver and tremble as that Spark flares a bit. Then she takes a gulp of air I didn’t realize she was holding back.

 

“Th– thank you. Matron Tretion. And…” She rasps, then freezes, very carefully turns eyes to mine. “Lyra. Awnya. I… yeah. Thanks. I’ll do anything I can to help keep you all safe.”

 

I want to look away. Can see all sorts of things I’d to run away from bubbling up and through her soul but… but can only lean just a little harder into our wonderful Fae.

 

She winces, looks down.

 

“Hey, let’s not get this all tangled.” Awnya squeezes me tighter. “We’re going to keep each other safe. You’re walking with us as an ally, not a guardian. Your girls would never stand for us letting you get lost out there.”

 

I nod, manage to whisper. “E– e– ever– y– one c– comes h– home.”

 

She glances back up. Nods. “Yeah. Okay. Absolutely. Two Fae, A Matron of Watchers, and a spitfire like me should be able to handle anything. No problem.”

 

“But that still means we need to plan things.” Tretion prompts. “Organize ourselves well. So, let’s get started.”