Do you think I'll let that happen?!

I won't let go of the girl's hand anymore. That's my vow. If that's the case, run! Reach for her hand!

I run towards the girl. In front of me, the ground beneath her starts to crack, softened by the heavy rain. Right now, I know the girl can't move her body. Shock from the previous events must have left her bewildered, so hurry –  quickly – catch her hand!

The ground collapses, my time is running out. I have no other choice but to jump, reaching out my hands as far as I can, hoping to at least grab one of the girl's hands.

And I succeed!

My muddy hands manage to reach the girl's right arm, which is about to fall into a 15-meter abyss. My gaze is now directly down the cliff, and my heart leaps at the height of this precipice. It seems as if the abyss is getting deeper, and it terrifies me.

However, I've managed to grab one of her arms. Now, all I have to do is try my best to lift the girl hanging on the edge of this cliff. My body, crouched at the edge with both hands tightly gripping her arm, faces the panic-stricken and worried expression on the girl's face. Our eyes finally meet, and her teary eyes pinch my heart.

"Don't worry, Hana! I'll definitely... save you!" I shout while trying to pull her body.

Her body is actually very slender. Am I so weak that I can't lift her?

Undeterred, I try to rise from my crouched position and add strength from my legs. But, I hate to admit it, I'm not strong enough. I can't ask Hana to do anything risky, and she can't move due to shock.

I can feel my body being burdened by Hana's weight. Shit, I'm already struggling just to hold her body and my muddy hands and Hana's slippery arms gradually lose their grip. I become more and more panicked, trying as fast and as hard as possible to pull Hana. I exert all my strength.

And, despite all that, Hana just keeps looking at me with deep worry in her gaze, not saying a word.

Then, as a glimmer of hope, Hana's hand begins to move towards me. Thank goodness; if she can reach the edge, I can immediately pull her. However, our time is limited, not only because of the risk of being dragged down by Hana but also because I feel my foothold starting to tremble.

A little more, Hana's hand will reach the edge. Just a bit more.

But, instead of reaching for the rock, her tiny fingers reach for my cheek. Her four fingers touch my face, making it muddy. Her touch calms my heart, all my previously tense muscles relax.

Again. This feeling again.

"Thank you, Arkan," she says softly and sweetly.

Again, those words. My heart hurts so much hearing them. Please, don't say it. I don't want to hear it.

"JUST SHUT UP! I WILL DEFINITELY SAVE YOU!" I shout loudly. I pull Hana again with all my strength.

The girl smiles. "Look..., at the beautiful sky. I wonder how they can live for so long," she says softly.

In contrast to me, who screams harshly and tries to vent my emotions.

"I WILL TELL YOU IF WE BOTH ARE OUT OF THIS LATER! SO PLEASE!"

Fear. Fear of losing something precious. Honestly, at that moment, I felt it for the first time. Fear of losing someone I cherish in my heart.

I can't bear it.

I almost lose my grip. The ground beneath my feet moves again. If it's going to end like this, at least I should -

"Arkan. Thank you for everything. But..., you must not come."

The girl smiles.

At last, both of my grips finally lose her. Still pulling with all my strength, I am thrown backward. My heart stops beating. My body becomes limp, with my hands supporting my limp body to sit. My breaths are heavy and in a really weird tempo.

I hear the sound of rocks falling from a height. In an instant, I jump back to the edge and look down. Hana is no longer there. Below, there's only a dense forest covering the ground. Unconsciously, the fireworks from earlier also seem to have started to disappear.

***

The cold air pierces my body as I sit stiffly in a visitor's chair in a corridor that is long enough to fit three rooms at once. Right next to me is a room covered by a metal door with a slightly opaque glass in the middle. The corridor's temperature is very cold, or maybe it's just my own body temperature that was previously covered in wet mud.

The room next to me sounds noisy with people concentrating on their work. I join my palms and clench them, somehow trying to give them strength. Strength that I don't have to save someone's life.

I am grateful to have made it here. When I couldn't see Hana at the edge of the cliff anymore, I didn't think about my own safety and found the shortest shortcut. Even if I had to jump from a height of 5 meters, for her safety, I didn't care much about my almost broken legs.

I'm grateful to be found by people around here who brought a pickup truck when we managed to get out of the forest onto the road. I found Hana in an unconscious state, so I had to carry her with the remaining strength I had. I am truly grateful to the man who gave us a ride to this hospital.

I also informed Hana's family, especially her uncle. Of course, hearing the news that his niece had suffered such a terrible accident, he sounded very panicked and worried. He himself said he would come here as soon as he could. I hope he will.

Not only him, I also informed Chika and Tomi. Chika, who obviously knew that Hana was with me today, seemed to have helped Hana prepare a birthday surprise for me. Chika, upon hearing the news, was truly furious with me. Useless, loser, irresponsible, coward, she threw everything at me, and I accepted it all. I didn't care because I also felt the same way. They both will be here soon.

Birthday surprise, my ass. I rather never celebrate it if I know it will come to this.

A feeling of hatred begins to resurface. Without you holding all of this, I will return to my old self. What even was that? Do you think you can come into my life, change it for the better, and then leave?

In an instant, I realize. It's not her leaving, it's me who doesn't have the strength to keep her by my side.

Oh, please, anyone. Kill me.

***

About an hour has passed. Uncle Elard said he would come as soon as possible, but it has been a while, and he hasn't shown up yet. However, its understandable since this hospital is quite far from our residential area.

The time shows 9:45. I hear footsteps quite loudly as if in a hurry. I turn my previously bowed head to the left, towards the lobby, and the source of the sound.

A tall man in a black suit and a fedora hat seems to be walking quickly down the corridor. The thud of his leather shoes resounds, indicating that he is anxious.

The resounding thud of his leather shoes indicates that he is anxious. He is Uncle Elard, accompanied by a middle-aged woman by his side.
Ah, even though I called him here. The erratic beating of my heart is getting faster. I don't know what to say to satisfy him.

I stand up and call his name. "Uncle," I say in a low tone.

He stops in front of me. His gaze, full of concern, is visible.

"Arkan, right. How is Hana?" he speaks with a rough voice, typical of a middle-aged man but with a really worried tone.

I swallow my saliva. I don't know what to answer except to say that the doctors haven't finished the operation, even since three hours ago.
"... The doctors haven't finished handling Hana, Uncle," I reply in a low tone, looking down.

His previously worried expression turns into deep disappointment. As if directed at me, I briefly prostrate myself in front of him.

"This is all my fault! Hana just wanted to celebrate my birthday. I couldn't protect her! I can't save her! It's all my responsibility, please forgive me!"

Honestly, I didn't expect forgiveness at all. All of it just came out of my mouth. His face, as if losing someone precious, makes me kneel.
He gently reaches for my shoulder and says, "It's alright."

That's all he says. That's how simple his words are. However, the relief he gives is not something to be taken lightly.

I try to support my body with my injured legs. It hurts, and I fall back to the floor. Both of my legs really can't move.

"You're injured too," he says while gently rubbing my shin. "Elly, please take Arkan to the doctor, his leg is also injured. I'll go to the service lobby to take care of the paperwork," he continues, speaking to the woman beside him. Ah, I just realized she is Hana's aunt. If I'm not mistaken, her name is Elly.

He helps me stand by carrying my arm over his shoulder, then hands me over to Aunt Elly. Then, we part ways. Uncle Elard goes to the service lobby, while Aunt Elly and I go to the doctor to check my leg.

"... I never expected it to turn out like this," she said.

"Eh?" I ask.

"That girl – for a week now – has been doing various weird things. She said it's all for a surprise for her precious friend. Wooden chairs and round tables with umbrellas, suddenly Elard was asked to help make those things. She spent a week just doing all that. However, I never thought it would end like this."

Ah, so that's how it is.

I try to open my mouth, answering, "Hana just wanted to celebrate my birthday, Auntie. Everything went smoothly at first. But my stupidity in bringing fireworks for her also triggered today's events. It's all my fault."

"He already told you not to say that, right? We know you're trying to take responsibility. But don't force yourself and keep blaming yourself. We just have to pray and hope for the best," she continues. At the end of her speech, I feel her grip on my shoulder stiffen. "That's all we can do right now," she continues with a quiet tone.

I return with legs wrapped in bandages containing pain-relief gel. The pain has already disappeared, but I am prohibited from activities like running or jumping for a week.

In front of Hana's operating room, Uncle Elard is sitting chatting with a man in a green surgical uniform with a matching head covering.

I am happy because I think Hana's operation has gone smoothly. My heart suddenly cheers seeing it. Although I know this is just hope. The doctor leaves as soon as he sees us, assuming their conversation is over.

Thinking that their conversation is over, we approach Uncle Elard, who is sitting in a visitor's chair. His worried gaze hasn't changed since earlier. I am a little worried seeing him.

"How? Did Hana's operation go well?" Aunt Elly asks.

Without moving his gaze, Uncle Elard answers, "Because of Arkan's efforts in bringing Hana here quickly, her condition is more stable than before. But... Hana is still in a coma and still needs surgery tomorrow."

"Oh, dear!" Aunt Elly exclaims worriedly. Her face changes to anxiety and full of concern.

So do I, hearing his explanation really hits me. My mind is blank, thinking about Hana in a coma.

"Hana suffered injuries to her chest from falling from a height. In addition, some of her ribs are broken, and she has chest and head trauma. It's a miracle that Hana is still alive," Uncle Elard continues his explanation.

Seriously?

Her condition turns out to be much worse than I thought. Damn, what is this...

"Besides, we need someone to stay here. Hana will be moved to a regular patient room to monitor her condition. Someone must stay here to be cautious about her condition."

"Please, Uncle, can I volunteer?" I reply loudly, nominating myself.

A little surprised, he asks, "Are you sure? What about your parents?"

"I've confirmed with them. Please allow me to accompany Hana only for tonight!" I insist. Because from the beginning, I thought of staying here to accompany her.

"... All right," he agrees.

Surprised by Uncle's decision, Aunt Elly says, "Is it okay?"

Without answering directly and just nodding, he replies to her question. Uncle Elard turns to me and says, "We leave everything here to you."

I nod. Because they still have business when I call them, Uncle Elard and Aunt Elly have to leave first, entrusting the monitoring of Hana's condition to me.

Not long after Uncle and Aunt leave, Chika and Tomi arrive. Both of them walk down the hallway, and eventually, Chika sees me and runs as fast as she can, then pulls the collar of my shirt.

"You better explain everything, little shit!" she exclaimed on high tone.