I arrive well before Jessica and James. The address is a bit further out than I was expecting; yeah, I knew the street, but the house number put it a good seven miles away. But I can run at fifteen miles per hour forever, so it only takes me thirty minutes to get there. I'm not breathing hard, mostly because I don't breathe unless I need the air to talk.

It's a small house with a white picket fence on a decent chunk of land.  The nearest neighbor's house is about a football field away. No trees, and the lawn could definitely use mowing; the grass reaches my waist.

The house is a two story affair with an attached garage. Yellow paint in good shape, looks like a heat pump on the side, solar panels on the roof, and a solid slab of concrete for a driveway. It's pretty inviting, other than the lawn.

I look around a bit while I wait. I've been doing a lot of waiting today. But it's not like I have anywhere to be.  I don’t have the keys to my car or apartment anymore, no ID, no debit card, no job, my family and friends won't believe I'm me….

When Detectives Jessica and James Jones arrive, they find me sitting on the front porch, bawling my eyes out.  Jessica sits down beside me and gently puts her arm around me. James doesn't say a word, he just takes a breath and waits.

I sniffle, "I … I’m sorry, I just… I just…"

Jessica tries to comfort me, "It's OK. You've been through more than I can imagine. You're OK, we'll get through this…"

The man I presume is James speaks up, "Seriously? This is the magic lady?"

In what's very much not my best decision ever, I glare at him, and cast Acid Splash. It burns a hole in his suit, and into the skin of his chest. He curses and jumps back, quickly ripping off his suit coat, shirt, and undershirt… not that the spell I used does any continuing damage, but it's not like he knows that.

"OK, OK," he says, now showing off his bare chest, which is bleeding where the acid burned him, "I'm convinced."

Realizing just how stupid that was, I try to make amends, "Here… let me fix that…" Mending solves his clothes issues, but he backs away with a bit of fear in his eyes when I reach over to tap him with Infernal Healing. Probably just as well. It is very efficient for healing HP damage, but that "can sense the evil of the magic" clause would probably bite me.

He does seem impressed that the holes in his clothes are gone. He doesn't put them back on yet, though: He's bloody, after all. And it's not like he's got anything to be ashamed of. He's got tanned skin, muscular arms, a chiseled chest with black hair, and a well-defined six-pack. It compliments his square chin, large nose, blue eyes, and groomed hair quite well, despite his five o'clock shadow.

Jessica says, "Let’s get that bandaged up," and lets go of me, standing up, walking to the dark oak front door, unlocking it with a key, and leading us all inside.

Inside, there's a lot of good furniture; it's plush… but unused. There's a layer of dust over everything, clothes and takeout boxes are scattered everywhere. Seems the homeowner is fond of the "Wanton Violet's Takeout Hut".  Honestly, it looks like a bachelor pad.

"Are you ever gonna clean up this place?" - wait, it's James that's asking?

"You know how busy they keep us," is Jessica's reply, "but come on, let's get you bandaged."

They go into the bathroom, and I wait outside. Well… Prestidigitation is good for cleaning… I start picking up the trash and stacking the laundry with my move actions while I use my standard ones to focus on the cantrip, cleaning things up one cubic foot at a time.  Of course, I run out of things to pick up first.  It's a 300 square foot living room, it'll take like half an hour to run Prestidigitation over everything; more, given the furniture. But I’m halfway done, with all the stuff picked up, by the time the two detectives are done. James comes out first, the bandage on his chest and pauses in shock at the half-pristine room. Jessica bumps into him, and they tumble.

"What’s wro…" Jessica starts to ask as she gets up… and doesn't complete the sentence, instead asking, "How?"

"Cleaning cantrip," I answer, "Vacuuming would be faster for the carpet, probably the couches too, but you get a fairly deep clean doing this."

"You’re hired," Jessica exclaims, "We can sort out compensation later."

"Magic Maid has some nice alliteration, I suppose. Probably already taken," I chuckle, "but right now I have nothing but the clothes on my back, so I can absolutely use any cash you can spare. I mostly did it to chip in, though. If I'm going to be living with you for now, it behooves me to be a good houseguest."

"Well… thanks. And you'll still need to get a real job, but yeah, I'll take you shopping. Ready to go?" Jessica looks at both James and myself.

"Sure. I suppose I don't exactly need to show anything to your partner now…."

"Definitely not," James responds, "I'm sold that you are real." He turns to Jessica, "Drop me off on the way?"

"Nah," she says, "Chris here needs a full set of clothes. We need a big, strapping young man to carry all her things."

"Umm…" James doesn't seem sold.

"... and of course, we'll need someone to judge her outfits." Jessica adds.

That James considers, "Fine," he says.

Jessica actually squeals, and drags the both of us back out to the car - presumably hers, given that James spoke of getting dropped off - and hops in the driver's seat. James gets in the passenger's side, and that leaves me taking the back… which is apparently where they dispose of their fast food wrappers during stakeouts. I clean it up a bit before sitting down, stuffing the trash into a Dairy King bag and using Prestidigitation to actually clean. I spend the trip cleaning the rest of the car, because I don't have any underwear, I'm wearing a barely-there skirt, and eww. I'm done cleaning when we arrive at the local thrift store, as a car is much smaller than a room. All that's left is to dump the trash… and there’s a convenient can on the way in.

"Are you going to do that everywhere we go?" James inquires as he opens the car door for me, looking at the sparkling clean back seat. I notice he has a tent in his pants, and remember: I'm always wet, and he's been stuck in a closed car with me for several minutes. I expect he's reacting to the scent.

"Probably not," I respond as I grab the Dairy King bag and get out, "But a super short skirt, no underwear, and a messy back seat don't mix."

"Yeah, that's fair," Jessica adds as we walk into the store and I drop the bag in the trash, "and you're not going to hear me complaining about someone cleaning up after me. If I do that, you might stop."

We all get a good chuckle out of that.

When we are in the store proper, James chomes in with, "Your show, ladies."

"We should probably start with underwear; I can help you look. What's your size?" I know Jessica is trying to be helpful.

Sally, I can't give her a good answer, "I umm…." I look around at the other shoppers, and try to be circumspect, "... had a 'growth spurt' very recently, and have no idea what my current sizes are. How do I find out?"

James cracks a smile as Jessica's face reddens,"I … will need to show you how to measure." She looks around, "Let’s get to the dressing rooms."

Now, I legitimately have no idea how to determine my size, and absolutely need help figuring this out… but I have discovered that Jessica is really fun to tease. I shouldn't. I really shouldn't. But I don’t think I can help myself. I wonder if I'll develop body shyness about my chest? Hmm.

"That’d be great, thank you."

Jessica leads me to the changing rooms, and as I step in one, I immediately say, "Oh, sorry," and step back out, closing the door.  It's occupied by some slutty stripper. I start moving to the next, but Jessica interrupts me.

"Umm, Chris?"

I pause, "Yeah?"

"The stall is empty. That was a mirror."

"Oh," Well, I knew it was bad… "I suppose I need to face the mirror sooner or later.  All right then…." I take a breath, find it's not as calming as it used to be, close my eyes, open the door, step in, and really look at myself for the first time since I changed.