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Being 6, I was now of age to go to a tea party. Now that I was engaged to the future Crown Prince, the number of invites for me had skyrocketed.

My mother had accepted the invite of Marchioness Maguire, so we were headed there right now. Prior to this, she had warned me to behave.

Honestly, I’m not sure why she keeps asking me to behave. I'm always on my best behavior....

Ehem.

Upon arrival, I could see several other carriages. Some of them I recognized the crest, others not so much.

I walked into the mansion, keeping pace with my mother. As the house of a Marquis, the Maguire mansion was huge, but it couldn’t really compare to the Blackburn mansion.

I took my seat at the table and watched as my mother walked into another room to talk with other mothers.

“Hello,” I heard a soft voice and turned to the owner. An adorable little girl was peering into my face.

“Hello,” I returned the greeting while trying to recall her older version, but my memory was failing me.

“I am Leonora Clementine. It’s a pleasure to meet you, Lady Lydia.”

‘Ah, Countess Clementine’s daughter,’ I thought, and my gaze darkened, “It’s a pleasure to meet you too, Lady Leonora.”

Countess Clementine’s daughter had drowned to death when I was 8. It had been a huge scandal because people had seen Marquis Gwendoline’s daughter push her into a lake.

As we exchanged pleasantries, I felt more and more stifled. I was talking with a dead girl. Waking up reborn had already been a surreal experience and this was even more surreal. I glanced at the other side of the table which was filled with giggles and chatter. Marquis Gwendoline’s daughter, Diana, sat there, her haughtiness already beginning to show.

I looked at the people I was talking to and the vivid expressions on their face. They were so young, but they were already beginning to have their own motives and schemes. But as children, they weren’t very proficient in masking their emotions.

I kept a smile plastered on my face while dreading my remaining my time here.  I felt immensely uncomfortable. Especially when I looked at Marquis Gwendoline’s daughter. She reminded me too much of myself.

 “Lady Lydia, is the Prince as handsome as I’ve heard?” Lady Isabella, Marchioness Maguire’s daughter asked me, her eyes twinkling.

Immediately, heads swerved to me. It was obvious many of them had been wanting to ask but felt hesitant because of my status.

I placed my teacup down and gave a small nod, “His Highness is quite dashing.” At my words, little squeals came from all corners of the table. Once the conversations switched to my fiancé, the cliques broke up and the girls focused their attention on me.

“I hear Prince Julius is also quite elegant,” another girl interjected.

“Oh, Prince Julius is beautiful,” a proud voice exclaimed, and all eyes turned to the owner. Lady Irene Calliwell was smiling, enjoying the attention on her frame. She had gotten engaged to Prince Julius sometime after me, so she naturally knew how he looked.

I lowered my head, hiding the pity in my eyes. Right now, these girls didn’t know Prince Julius’ true status, so they flailed over him. Although Prince Julius was a prince, he was a maid’s child.

And above all, he didn’t have the suffix, ‘de Edis’ in his name.

Queen Rowena was the princess of the Ganyetsa kingdom. The King couldn’t afford to lose all cordiality with her. So even though he forcefully entered Prince Julius into the royal family, he compromised with Queen Rowena by not adding ‘de Edis’ to Julius’ name. With the name ‘Kahler’, Julius was of royal blood, but without ‘de Edis’, his claim to the throne was almost non-existent.

The conversation devolved into discussion about the princes and since I was connected to one of them, I was dragged into it.

When the tea party was over, I almost leapt for joy. I stood at the entrance, watching as people began to leave and gave my farewells. I watched as Diana Gwendoline sashayed to her carriage, her shoulders prominent in the air.

‘Ah, she really reminds me of myself.’

I used to be…quite arrogant. I used to lord my status over people and look down on people under me.

Perhaps I was overcompensating.

I was hollow on the inside, so I had to look beautiful on the outside. I had to look proud. I had to look like I had everything.

And technically I did.

I had a powerful family, a powerful father, a powerful fiancé and I was on my way to becoming the future Queen. Although I wasn’t loved at home, I didn’t want anyone to know that.

No.

I couldn’t let anyone know that. So I puffed out my chest and acted with grandeur.

By the time I was 7, I realized that no matter what I did, I wouldn’t be punished. I might be reprimanded slightly but that was good. My mother payed attention to me when she rebuked me. My father too, sometimes when I crossed the line. However, as the Duke’s daughter, especially as the Duke of Blackburn’s daughter, nobody could do anything to me. Even the royal family had to be careful with me. 

At least, that’s what I thought until they put me in jail.

My eyes left Diana’s frame and moved to the soon-to-be dead Leonora Clementine standing beside me. She was also waiting for her mother and chose to stand with me. I suppose you could say we had moved from strangers to acquaintances during this tea party.

“You know my brother actually—”

“Lady Leonora,” I suddenly cut her off. She looked stunned at my abrupt change in tone.

“Yes, Lady Lydia?”

I peered into her eyes, but I didn’t know what I was looking for. Then I smiled softly, “Stay away from water.”

“Huh?”

“Lakes, ponds, springs. Stay away,” I didn’t know why I was telling her this. She’d probably forget everything I say here today. Children didn’t have the best memory. Just as I could barely remember attending this tea party in my first life.

Leonora looked at me and her expression slowly turned odd. She opened her mouth, wanting to say something  then she closed it. A moment of silence passed then she spoke, “I understand. Thank you.”

My eyes widened. She seemed to understand what I was saying. I suddenly looked at her anew. She still looked adorable, but her violet eyes looked oddly solemn.

‘Is there...something I don’t know?’

“I’ll have to excuse myself, Lady Lydia. My mother is out,” she bowed and walked to her mother.

My eyes silently followed her.

‘I guess everyone has their own issues.’

I sighed and looked inside, wondering what my mother was doing. Then I caught sight of Irene Calliwell. She looked happy. She really did. But I couldn’t help sighing again.

‘Poor girl.’

She’s engaged to a dead man.