Min's heart skipped a beat as an unexpected turn of events unfolded on an otherwise grey day. The sheer presence of Hyun, seated right next to him, sent a jolt of excitement and nervousness pumping through his veins. It was a rare occurrence for Min to have such proximity to Hyun, who was almost always positioned far beyond his line of sight. Min would often find himself scanning the area, squinting his eyes just to catch a fleeting glimpse of his crush. Hyun's perpetual movement only added to the challenge, appearing in various locations like a dragonfly darting about. Whether he was reluctantly present in the library, indulging in snacks with friends by the canteen, or engrossed in an intense game of basketball, his restlessness was reminiscent of those agile insects Min had watched in nature documentaries during his younger days.
Min had grown accustomed to appreciating Hyun from a distance, making this close encounter all the more unusual and difficult to handle. There had been only one other instance when Min found himself this close to Hyun. It happened two months ago during the peak of soccer fever when Hyun accidentally kicked a ball out of the field amidst preparation. The ball rolled toward Min and Akio, who were engrossed in a heated conversation about mint chocolate, the ghost in the toilets, and even the possibility of the school founder's body being buried beneath the flower bed in the garden. Akio groaned in annoyance as the ball interrupted their passionate debate, prompting Min to pick it up, unknowingly setting a life-altering scene into motion.
As someone approached them at a brisk pace, Min soon realized that he should have heeded Akio's advice. Regret washed over him, growing stronger with each passing second. Finally, after what felt like an eternity, the towering figure reached them—it was Hyun.
Min's entire being froze, rooted to the ground like the flowers in the bed Akio had pointed at minutes ago. He desperately wanted to move, to appear nonchalant in the presence of his one true love, but his efforts fell flat. Hyun stood before him, drenched in sweat from head to toe, evidence of his intense practice sessions in pursuit of the coveted tournament trophy. Despite the cuts and bruises on his legs, he exuded a vibrancy and freshness that surpassed everyone else in the vicinity. Even amidst the rigorous training, Hyun emitted an enticing scent that enveloped Min like a gust of wind, reminiscent of the impact a soccer ball had once made on him in a sensitive region.
"I'm sorry! I hope I didn't interrupt your conversation," Hyun said, his hand nervously grazing the back of his head, a hint of apology gracing his face.
Min longed to assure him that no trouble had been caused, and to express gratitude for the blessing of his mere presence. However, his lips were rendered motionless, failing to release the words trapped within. Observing Hyun in his sleeveless white top and short black shorts, with his toned arms and legs on full display, Min became captivated, lost in a daze. A healthy, rose-pink flush swept across Min's cheeks, unable to conceal the effect Hyun had on him.
Taking the ball from Min's hands, Hyun turned to Akio and asked, "Aki, is your friend ok? His face is quite red."
"Min? Are you alright, bro?"
"...."
"Min? Well, I guess it's just allergies or something."
Hyun chuckled warmly and patted Min's back.
"Take care, Min!"
With that, Hyun jogged back to the field, kicking the soccer with renewed vigor.
As Min and Akio sat on a stone bench beneath the comforting shade of a royal poinciana tree shielding them from the scorching heat, a soothing warmth enveloped Min's entire body. It wasn't the enervating heat from outside the shade that sucked his energy dry but rather a cozy sensation that made him feel at ease and content.
Anyway, Min," Akio exclaimed with conviction, interrupting Min's thoughts. "I'm telling you, the founder's body is right under there! Look! Doesn't that place look haunted?" Akio's tone carried a hint of frustration as he pointed his finger toward the mysterious garden.
Although Min was physically present, his mind wandered off to a distant world. He found himself mentally transported, detached from the conversation that somehow continued in the background.
A whirlwind of thoughts stormed Min's mind. Initially joyous, they soon morphed into a melancholic torrent. Min believed that pursuing a relationship with Hyun was an unattainable dream. He saw himself as an ordinary, timid boy who could never match Hyun's league. But the sadness went deeper. Min was plagued by the realization that he might be destined for a life of solitude. Being naturally introverted, his attraction to boys only added another layer of complexity to his struggles. He longed to like girls exclusively, to fit into society's mold and avoid the fear and backlash he associated with embracing his true self. It pressed on him, even though he had committed no wrongdoing. He hadn't come out to anyone, yet his internal battles were already overwhelming.
Suddenly, Min snapped out of his bittersweet daydream and focused his gaze on Hyun, slumbering peacefully at the adjacent desk. Hyun, not even a math student, sought refuge in the back row for some rest. He slept soundly, his head resting on the desk, and his vulnerable face turned toward Min. His hands hung loose, resembling the prop roots of a banyan tree. Despite the prominent dark circles under his eyes and a slight drool, Min's heart soared. It brought him happiness to witness Hyun's adorable sleep.
At that moment, realization washed over Min like a breaking dawn. He might not fully embrace who he was, but he couldn't fathom a life where he couldn't appreciate the depth and beauty of men. The indescribable feeling that surged through him when he saw Hyun or his favorite actor on screen exhilarated him. It painted a rare smile on his face, even in the midst of life's draining challenges beyond his sexuality. Min grappled with his inner struggle, but he understood that trying to deny a fundamental part of himself and yearning to become someone he was not would only lead to further anguish. He wanted to accept and love himself.
Finally, the endless class came to an end. Min wished he could feast his eyes on the handsome boy for a few more precious moments, but the chatter of Hyun's troublesome gang just outside the classroom reminded him of the reality. He swiftly made his way to the dining area, eager to satiate his rumbling stomach.
As Min savored his solitary lunch, the absence of Akio was conspicuous. He suspected that his friend was occupied with his girlfriend, a suspicion fueled by the unmistakable joy that illuminated Akio's face whenever he glanced at his phone or zoned out during recent conversations.
Amidst the boring routine, the teachers announced the cancellation of all classes for the remainder of the day in anticipation of the annual school music festival. Music held a special place in Min's heart, yet he believed he wasn't destined for the spotlight. He harbored doubts about subjecting innocent and unsuspecting ears to his supposedly dreadful voice, or so he convinced himself.
Upon hearing the announcement, Min's expectations for the day skyrocketed. With no performance obligations, he found himself liberated for the rest of the afternoon. Despite a looming workload, he resolved to indulge in his passion for drawing at his cherished hideaway—a weathered bench nestled deep in the garden, concealed by a dense curtain of shrubbery.
Min, while not a master artist, found solace in the therapeutic act of drawing. Despite his self-perceived shortcomings compared to the school's talented art students, he appreciated the freedom of bringing his imagination to life with a simple pencil and notepad.
His preferred subject matter often revolved around monsters, using his gloomy thoughts as inspiration to create nightmarish characters that symbolized his perceived faults. However, on this particular day, Min's mood had lifted slightly, prompting a desire to observe and sketch the pretty sunbirds that frequented the flowering bushes during that time of day.
As Min reached the entrance of the garden, he maneuvered his slender frame through the narrow gaps between overgrown bushes. Finally emerging on the other side, he was left in awe.
Typically, the bench was adorned with foliage that required gentle displacement. The surrounding area teemed with life, yet an undercurrent of desolation permeated the atmosphere. Plants, insects, and sporadic birds thrived, creating a paradoxical juxtaposition of vitality and melancholy. Despite the haunting ambiance, Min felt a deep connection to the place, as it mirrored his own character. Usually, the spot remained enveloped in a profound silence, punctuated only by the occasional chirping of birds, buzzing of insects, or the gentle landing of falling leaves. However, today was different.
Before him sat a tall figure on the bench, his hands vigorously rubbing at weary eyes, shoulders hunched forward, and his neck sagging. He exuded an overwhelming sense of despondency, with ceaseless tears rolling down his cheeks. Though muffled, his subdued whimpers carried the emotion of immense pain and suffering.
Compelled to investigate further, Min cautiously approached, eager for a clearer view. It was then that he noticed the boy's arm—a waning crescent moon tattoo on his wrist. And at that moment, realization struck Min like a lightning bolt.
