“A-ano, Sensei Wraith is here.” Nozomi spoke as she used the ornate knocker to rap on the door. The entrance itself was an ornate double door made of engraved mahogany, the carved images of lightning bolts and the Shimazu clan mon (emblem) dotted the edges while in the center the thunder god Raijin was displayed with meticulous detail. In fact the door knocker itself was one of his three clawed hands holding onto his hammer used to play the drums surrounding him in a circle. The thing was so life-like that I could swear I saw its eyes following me. 

“He may enter, but you must remain outside.” The mouth of the carving opened and a melodic female voice came from it. I now realized that this was an over-the-top way of installing an intercom and I really wanted one for my own home. Though if I were to have one it would be a carving of a chick, a really hot chick.

“Yes, headmistress.” Nozomi bowed before opening the door for me. The feeling of four different sets of eyes locking on me as I entered the stuffy office room made me feel a little nervous. These four were easily top-10 in terms of exorcists in Japan and even on a world stage the headmistress would be able to compete for a top-10 spot in global rankings too. 

“Hello Shimazu-san, sorry about being late. My alarm clock got unplugged while I was asleep hahaha!” I watched as her face soured at my use of her last name, oh right family issues. Damn, the mangaka really likes broken and dysfunctional families apparently because I haven't met any main character with a normal loving family.

Her blue-grey eyes narrowed as she zeroed in on my clothes. Her own body was clad in the same type of black pantsuit she wore the last time I saw her. Her pale, inhumanly translucent skin was revealed by the ample cleavage of her blazer, my eyes drifted there as I noticed the necklace around her neck was missing. That and maybe I was sneaking in a few peaks because this is the first time I’d ever seen the woman not wearing an undershirt under her blazer jacket.   

 

“I accept your apology Mr. Wraith, just make sure this does not become a common occurrence. Please take a seat.” With those words her eyes drifted away from me as if she had lost all interest in me. She placed her hands on the meeting room table and steepled her fingers as she leaned forward. I grabbed hold of the back of the empty chair in front of me, the wood squeaking across the floor caused all of those who heard it to grimace. Sitting down I was met once again with the other three teachers various stares of disapproval, amusement, and an emotion I couldn't track. 

“Ahem, before we were so rudely interrupted I’d like to get to the main reason the headmistress called for this faculty meeting today. The annual Exorcist Academy Goodwill Tournament will still be held on June 1st and last until the 3rd like it has for the past 71 years. We cannot show any sign of weakness to our sister school  in Kyoto after the attack if we want to keep the clans from joining in on their side entirely.” The man who spoke gave me a glare with his crimson eyes. His hand slicked back his hair as he looked back down at some papers scattered across the meeting room table. The man wore suspenders over his grey dress shirt, his jacket having been draped over the backrest of his chair 

I could recognize the bloak had it in for me because he was the same type of stickler toward Daichi in the manga. Rules and regulations committee president and owner of the largest stick shoved up his ass, Homura Yuto. He was the fourth year teacher and I kind of forgot he existed as I was preoccupied kicking ass and fucking babes, but truthfully forgetting about him wouldn't really effect much because unlike Daichi this bastard can't touch me. He can whine, bitch, and tattle tale all he wants but the worse that can happen is I get a slap on the wrist by the headmistress. The thought of having some alone time with Shimazu Hikari being ‘punished’ doesn't sound half bad.

“Are we sure this is a good idea?” My eyes turned toward the large man wearing a Hawaiian shirt still busy nibbling away at what appeared to be a hunk of grilled meat. His tan-skinned hands were soaked in grease as he held onto the bone of either a large bovine or some species of animal only known to this world because the thing looked like something a caveman would eat in a cartoon. 

Despite his pudgy and jiggly physique, I had no illusion that the man wasn't a deadly combatant as underneath all that fluff was the musculature of a powerlifter. Yamazaki Souta, the second year teacher was a fan favorite due to his eccentric look and even weirder personality. It helped when you were a jolly fat man who could turn into a deadly killer in an instant giving the audience much-needed bursts of levity and badassery. He was the deadly dad bod as fans liked to call him.

“Come now Souta-kun, there's nothing to be worried about. After all, we’ve got our very own Tier-3 killer here~!” An unfamiliar voice and even more concerning an unfamiliar face greeted me. The man wore a purple top hat, a silk bow was tied around the base of the hat along with a golden watch. The second hand ticking along the pink clockface told me the thing was in working order. 

The man himself had shoulder-length plum-colored hair underneath the hat, the silky strands framed and dangled over his face. His deep amethyst eyes gazed at me as if he saw the funniest joke, and yet his lips were pressed firmly in a line. The pale makeup covering his skin was uniquely clown-like and his mauve-painted lips were a flamboyant addition to his entire lavender ensemble.   

His suit was...you guessed it purple. Golden chains laced across the gap in his violet jacket along with the chain for his pocket watch. The man was more decorated than a Christmas tree and studded out in more chains than any rapper. How in the hell could I not remember this man's name? It should be easy as out of everyone in the room he looks most out of place, hell the bastard was twirling a cane around in his hands as he spoke like a comically evil villain! 

“Hmm, what's wrong Garridan-kun~? You look a bit pale.” The man’s eyes narrowed on me as he spoke, the playful gleam still shining brightly in them hadn't faded even with his added suspicion.

“Isn't it obvious Prett-san, you’re putting too much pressure on the guy!” Souta spoke for me as I found myself unable to address the man in purple, a blank coming to my mind on his name. Prett...Prett, it's such an alien name, and yet my brain is screaming at me that it's just on the tip of my tongue. 

This is the memory I lost using [Sheol] isn't it? A sinking feeling grew in the pit of my stomach as I realized I might have made a grave mistake. This man is clearly a villain, his outfit, mannersisms, and distinct personality are all tell tale signs of an evil clown. It would be like going to the world of Hunter x Hunter and forgetting about any relevant information on Hisoka or like being summoned to Lugnica and having no idea of the sinister devil that is Roswaal L. Mathers. That would make me Natsuki Subaru, and no one wants to be Subaru!

“Yamazaki-san is right Crawford-san, you’re putting too much pressure on him. After all it's not like he actually killed the Dōji sisters right?” Yuto fired off that pot-shot while I was still contemplating my mortality. So when he got mad that I ignored his stupid comment I had no idea.

“Homura-san, I have already made myself clear that Mr. Wraith did in fact defeat three Tier-3 phantoms and rescued not only his assistant Charlotte Kraus but also a student of ours Ueda Daichi. Please show me proper respect by not accusing me of being a liar next time in the presence of others.” The headmistress gave a scathing rebuttal to Yuto who bowed his head at a ninety-degree angle and began the time-honored tradition of the Japanese, that being apologizing profusely. 

“Let us get back to the topic at hand, and discuss the tournament then~!” Prett gave the brooding headmistress an amicable smile as he tried to steer the conversation back on track. My own thoughts turned toward the original plot of the story and how this would’ve been the same event where Char would be attacked by a Tier-2 phantom and fall in love with her knight in shining armor Daichi. Though since the plot has already been fucked to hell and back I might as well throw away any assumption of what I think will happen and just prepare for the worst-case scenario. 

“What is there to discuss, won’t it be run like it always has since its inception?” Souta asked the headmistress, his teeth tearing into a particularly large hunk of meat as he spoke. I'm assuming his family’s technique requires an excess of calories to change their physical size like in the manga. The question is, how did they evolve their light aether node to be able to do such a thing?

“It has been decided that the usual team fight of the first day will remain, but the other two days are left up to the two Captains of the schools respective teams to decide. That also leads us into the real reason why I called you four in here today. We must decide who will represent the school and lead the team as Captain this year.” Everyone eyed one another, Prett grinning at me as we sat across from one another. Damnit I forgot about this, we have to fight one another to see who gets to be the leader of the school team for the tournament. 

In the manga, Charlotte barely eeked out a victory against Souta who is way weaker than Yuto. The only problem though is that my memory of the final fight was blurry, the event was a blank in my mind and the only thing I knew was Char won. That meant that instead of the fourth-year teacher winning the first round it was in fact the enigma sitting across from me. How she beat the clown standing in front of me I had no idea but I felt oddly uneasy about it. I hate to admit it but the Roy Mustang wannabe Yuto is definitely stronger than Char and even in her current state of training he would soundly win. The clown beat him, and I had no clue how the freaky anomaly fought. 

“May the best man win~!” Prett smiled at me, his eyes glancing at his other two potential opponents. 

“Just know I won't be holding back, I've already hit the buffet twice today in the cafeteria!” The Jolly laugh of Souta filled the air. How the man didn't choke on the food still in his mouth was a mystery best left explained away as geist related. 

“When I win I’ll make sure only the best students participate in the tournament for our team,” Yuto spoke those words while he glared at me. I could only shrug my shoulders at his open disdain of me. After all, it's not like I’ve done anything to him to warrant this, at least that he knows of.

“When I win I’ll make sure to save at least a spot for your guy's best students. After all, my kids will need some substitutes so they can catch their breath after kicking ass all day.” I smirked, this is so going to be a shitshow so I might as well stir the pot!