19th October, 2015

Seoul, South Korea.

The news that day announced the suicide of a young student who threw herself onto the train tracks.

----[Shin-ae Heewon's perspective]

-Hey, Heewon, could you help me set up Photoshop?

Suddenly, I feel a voice calling out to me. I turn to look at it, taking off one of my headphones and asking.

-Did you call me?

It's my colleague from next door. She gives me an expectant look.

-Yes, I did. Do you have any idea how to set up Photoshop?

I don't really know her name... I hope I don't make it obvious, we've had no contact by any means. But I guess he must want something if he spoke to me first. It would be good if I just act cordial with her.

I make a small gesture to signal her to pass me her computer.

-What do you want to do?

-Ah, I just want to get all the basic settings the teacher indicated, but I didn't pay enough attention. You always take notes, so.... Will you please help me?

She's always been like that. Uncaring and always begging for help when she doesn't know what to do. But I guess her pretty face is the plus point that makes it easy for her to convince someone to do something for her.

It's a good thing I didn't meet someone like that in high school... I'm pretty sure I would have been abused by her too if that were the case.

It doesn't take me long to type everything I need, and I'm done. I finished quickly because I had already done this on my own computer.

-Thank you very much Heewon, I owe you one!

Just listen to her, calling people by name when they haven't given her permission. I forgot to stress that before.

I gather my things and get up to leave the room. I had been deep in thought because I was listening to music, but the class had already been over for a while.

Without talking or saying goodbye to anyone, just that. Shin-ae Heewon is that kind of person. Without a single friend.

I can say that even though I look different now, it's all because of the way I looked until last year... I used to be very chubby, and my features weren't as pronounced as they are now.

Such appearance made many of my classmates take it against me and hurl insults like "Pig", "Snorlax" or "Fat ass" just because of my appearance. I didn't ask to be like that. I was simply born that way because of my parents' genetics.

But still, everyone was horrible to me. It was because of such behaviour that I developed an aversion to socialising or anything related.

And yes, I thought about it. I thought many times about committing suicide because of the way everyone referred to me.

I just never had the courage to do something like that. And I just dismissed such stupid ideas from my head, moving on with my life.

I couldn't do well in my grades either, and ended up taking up graphic design because it was the easiest thing to do with my qualifications. Thank goodness my parents never reprimanded me for my poor performance in class, as long as I didn't drop out, everything was fine.

That being the case, I grew up without any friendly environment around me.

I've never been able to make any friends or anything like that because I'm afraid of what they might think about me.

Although it's not like I'm much prettier now than I was back then... I just stretched out and I'm not fat anymore... but my face is still the same.

Leaving the university, the night sky greets me. Wow, looks like I got lost for a while.

I hadn't taken many steps when a message landed on my mobile. It was from my mum.

[Daughter, when you get out of university buy me a packet of sausages and mayonnaise.]

I opened the messaging app and replied with a cherry sticker saying "OK".

I'll have to take a little detour then... but, well, it's on my way home anyway. I'll just walk to the nearest train station for now so I can get the hell out of there.

It's been a long day... and mostly I couldn't write anything today. That's what frustrates me the most.

You see, even though I'm studying graphic design, my real hobby is being a writer. I've done several drafts for a story, but they've all been rejected by publishers. I think they've had twenty-three of these so far.

The last one is still under review, but I'm not hopeful anymore.

I doubt they'd want to take a story like that. The stories are told as such, where the female protagonist is reincarnated and becomes very strong. It seems that the audience doesn't really like that it's different from the stereotypical male protagonist.

That being the case... I don't stand a chance in the writing world if I want to innovate something never seen before.

Could someone tell me where I'm wrong?

I doubt it very much.

Sorry, Leah... it looks like we're going to have to wait a long time to show the world who you are. At least until they can understand that the powerful protagonists of stories can't only be male.

In fact, I wish I was as lucky as that Japanese guy, what was his name...? Tatsuda or something... A few days ago that boy, only 15 years old, received the Akutagawa prize in literature!

I haven't been able to read his book yet, but the general critics are delighted with his work and are looking to give him a boost worldwide.

It's funny. Because it makes me think of something I had never considered before.

Tatsuda expressed it as "That entity that we shape every day". I wonder if that is true. If there is some "God" by which we make the world be influenced.

The message is somewhat abstract, as is the very idea of it. But it hits on a lot of philosophies of the greatest thinkers. That guy is a fabulous writer. When I get to read his book, "The Catharsis of Atheism", my perspective on things may change.

A "God" who is an atheist of herself? Why didn't I think of that before?

It's a brilliant idea no matter which way you look at it. Meanwhile, me, being rejected multiple times for the same job but with changed ideas just because I think the popularity will be low having a female lead.

I've finished arriving at the train station, and I've already paid my ticket, so I just have to wait on the safe side of the tracks, it shouldn't be too long now... but I still have that bitter taste in my mouth.

I'd like to show them how wrong they are...

「Oh. Then you should do it in the flesh」

Such a voice infiltrates my thoughts, and before I could even react at least, I could feel my feet detach from the ground.

My thought process begins to dilate. My whole brain tries to process who such a voice was about, but I couldn't come up with anything. There was no escape. There was nothing to do anymore, because the blinding light of the train's headlights covered my range of vision.

And... this is how Shin-ae Heewon's life ends.

But before her consciousness fades away, despite the horrifying death she died in which her whole body was mutilated by the force of the train. She hears.

- - -

[Welcome to the "System"]

- - -

Only for everything to go black afterwards.