Chapter 5

The preparations for a royal débutante were in full swing. Estel became scarce - she and the Prime Minister Vonne worked together to create a lavish event. Amirya had been extravagant for many years now, so they wanted to appease her on the day to avoid a meltdown. Also, it was a royal’s party, so no one thought it wise to leave it to the princess. She didn’t mind, because she had no inclination to take on any responsibility.

Inside one of her Flower Palace’s drawing rooms, Amirya lounged on a large, plush blue sofa in a comfortable but elegant yellow dress. She fiddled with the fake flowers sewn into the lace.

I like it, but it’s so different from when I was Zee. I wonder how much it would startle these people if I showed up in a black leather miniskirt and chains? The thought amused her enough that she chuckled as she imagined it.

Sunlight beamed through the wide windows and bounced off the ornate walls and decor. Madame Koe, the most sought after dressmaker in the capital, and her assistants scurried about to set up cloth and fabrics, accessories, lace, dresses, and other ornaments in an appealing layout. Etora leaned over the objects, her eyes glistened, and she bounced on her toes. Usually, an excited aura was cute and jovial, but Etora’s was stained with covetous dark green tones with a tinge of bitterness.

“Princess,” Etora called tentatively, “I got a message from one of the Queen’s court ladies - she said she’ll pay for your party dress! Isn’t that amazing?”

Yanafir poured fresh tea and flinched slightly when Amirya scoffed. Well, she still hadn’t thrown or broken anything, so still an improvement. “Do you think a princess can’t afford her own dress?”

“Ah… no, Princess, it’s just-” Etora’s face conveyed worry, and she raised her hands to shake them in denial. Her spirit riveted in anger. Auras like hers nauseated Amirya.

“Shut up,” Amirya snapped. Whenever she slept, she’d remember bits and pieces, and her tolerance thinned. Memories thick with emotion were easier to recall, and they were also the worst.

Etora and Yanafir both reported to Corentine, and at first, she despised them both. She came to understand why Estel taught Yanafir. Like Estel, Yanafir took pride in everything she did, but unlike the older woman, she was weak and anxious at heart. But-

She’s never hated me, even though my existence causes her distress. Rather than hate, in her own way, she tried to protect me. There was nothing a mere maid, from a fallen noble family at that, could do against the Queen. In the future, Yanafir tried to keep the princess calm and out of sight to avoid the ‘lessons’ Corentine had Petra bestow. Meanwhile Etora relished in the humiliation of the princess. 

“I bet she has something picked out for me, since she’s so graciously said she’ll use Father’s money - the same money I’d use - to pay for the thing? Or did she dip into her own coffers? And I bet those precious gifts are so new and trendy that their hideousness is simply due to me lacking the education or culture to appreciate it? And who said you can just use ‘Princess’? Call me properly.” Amirya’s words dripped with contempt. With an elbow on the side of the sofa, she leaned into her hand and gazed at Etora with half-lidded, bored eyes. 

In those glimmers of her first life, Etora and other maids loudly gossiped about how the nobles would disparage her at the party for various reasons: the embarrassment that was the ceremony, her refusal to attend the Royal Academy, and otherwise. After a fit, Amirya decided against a party since she didn’t have to debut yet. She was already engaged, so why did she need to? She was manipulated out of the Academy and out of the party. They tried it this time, too, with a slightly different angle. But this time, she notified Estel, who punished them appropriately.

“N-No, Your Highness, forgive me, I didn’t-” Etora paled, not used to a princess that wasn’t easily manipulated.

“Perhaps you don’t know what shutting up means?” Amirya interrupted without raising her voice. Yanafir averted her eyes and kept her position to the side of the couch while she silently wondered to herself which version of the princess was better. “I thought the queen picked educated little girls for me? Go away. But summon Nanny here before you do.”

Etora opened her mouth to argue but closed it, bowed deeply, and ran out. She only clasped her hands together for the bow, too shaken to thread her fingers. Slowly, Amirya’s eyes fell on Yanafir, who kept her composure while her aura swirled. Perhaps she waited to see if Amirya would snap at her too.

“Do you lack anything, Your Highness?” Yanafir asked after several minutes.

“Jelly cookies.” She mused. “How could I entertain guests without that much?”

“Of course,” Yanafir bowed, her hands laced. It showed respect, used for royalty and the higher nobles from those of lower status.

One of Madam Koe’s girls brought a book over to her and bent deeply at the waist, a small tremble in her fingers. Amirya waved her off and flipped through the catalog nonchalantly, which relaxed the tension from the girls working with the Madam. Instead of focusing on the images in front of her, she thought of A Witch’s Magic for the hundredth time.

All she managed witch-wise since the library was meditation. A frown pulled at her lips, and Amirya was ignorant to the trepidation that mounted on the other side of the room from the small action. She couldn’t recall the details from Elle’s teachings. The knowledge that there was astral or elemental magic, spells, potions, and whatever else tortured her since she couldn’t remember how to do them.

She had to open that damn book. So she meditated. She’d breathe in and exhale in a controlled manner while she imagined the energy of the cosmos moving through her. To the maids’ horror, she even ordered them into staring contests as she tried to read their thoughts or hypnotize them. It didn’t work, though she can handle aura better even after that meager training.

Goes to show if I had even tried a little bit before… Amirya shook off the thought.

“Princess,” Estel called as she approached, “are you picking a dress? I saw His Majesty’s servant before, he wanted to know the fabrics and colors you chose.”

Usually, a dress was chosen much earlier than this, but the Queen, who managed gatherings at the palace, lacked consideration for this débutante.

“I need Nanny’s help,” Amirya responded.

“Oh, nonsense.” But Estel grinned and dusted off her skirt as she sat on the chair closest to the princess.

Amirya gazed at her happy, dancing aura. “Nonsense? So then can I have a black dress? With lots of straps and maybe chains as accessories?”

Estel’s horrified expression caused Amirya to snort.

“My princess, I may be getting too old for your jokes.”

Amirya hummed and watched how Estel attentively considered the options.

“Will Sephine debut at the party?” Amirya asked suddenly.

“Oh, that girl,” her aura danced even more, “maybe next year, I’m thinking. She’s too beautiful, just like you; I don’t need creatures like men to look upon her. And she’s more than happy to keep working with her father. Every year, she puts it off one more, but there’s no reason for me to refuse.”

Sephine, Estel’s daughter, was only a year older. Right now, before her birthday, they shared the age of eighteen. They used to play together as children, but Amirya ruined that, too. Her only friend - and she threw it away for a triffling cause - just because Sephine said she liked Valerian.

Amirya sighed.

“The lady-in-waiting is still not decided,” Amirya stated and broke Estel’s concentration in the design book. Yanafir returned with a cart full of various snacks and desserts along with a small tower of different jelly cookies. “Prepare tea for Nanny, and then Yanafir, sit down as well.”
Both Yanafir and Estel gave surprised expressions. Amirya sighed again, “It’s not like I’m good with fashion. I’ve always depended on the two of you.”

After pouring the tea, Yanafir carefully sat in another chair, eyes focused on her hands. Her discomfort was almost enough to make Amirya feel guilty.

Estel shifted, cleared her throat, and obviously corrected her language before she spoke, “Yes, the queen should have designated at least three lady-in-waitings by now. I’ve compiled a list and am carefully considering…”

“I only need one.” Amirya responded. One corner of her mouth pulled up in a small smile. The rare tilt of her mouth softened her expression quite a bit. One of the servants of Madame Koe gasped - she had been watching the princess carefully the whole time, and she turned and whispered into the ear of another. “And for Yanafir, she can be my close, personal maid. She can handle duties another lady-in-waiting ought to. As of now, though, I can’t have someone from a fallen family as my lady.”

Yanafir choked on her spit. Amirya didn’t bother to pay her any mind. “And what do you think about Sephine, Nanny?”

The question held a hint of uncertainty. Sephine was trustworthy, even if the past put a wedge between them. The princess worried that the wedge was not something Sephine would easily forgive.

Estel blinked, happy but tentative, “I don’t think Sephine would decline my dear, and I would be honored for my daughter to hold such a position. She’s always worked in her father’s business to pick up the trade, but this would be better, and she could even go to school with you…” Estel let herself trail off before she began to ramble.

“There is no one else I would trust more,” Amirya said softly.

Estel’s small smile warmed her heart.

Amirya finally turned to Yanafir. “Yanafir, you’re fine with this, right? I can trust you.” She added the last comment to torture the girl a little bit.

Yanafir paled but shyly met Amirya’s eyes and she nodded. “Then this conversation didn’t happen, did it? We’ve been enjoying jelly cookies and giving Madame Koe’s people a difficult time, huh?”

Yanafir nodded again. The princess’s personal maid was still a promotion and would move her directly under Estel’s care.

Amirya smirked and flicked her hand and called loudly, “Approach.”

Madame Koe and two of the girls eagerly came forward. Madam Koe engaged Estel and Yanafir since Amirya’s disinterest was clear, and those two were determined and excited to pick the perfect dress. Yanafir’s aura turned soft and earnest, the calm flow of her energy was a new sight from her. Amirya’s eyes met with one of the girls who assisted the Madam; the same girl who watched her incessantly before. The girl blushed and continued looking on. The princess raised an eyebrow at her, but the girl merely covered her mouth and nose with her hands as her aura jerked about in elation.

I think I would have an easier time if they were adverse to me rather than whatever this is. Amirya was not proud, but she looked away first.