It rained again last night when I was already deep in sleep, the ambient noise was so calming that I overslept for the first time since forever.Finally when I got the serene moment to open my eyes, it was already brunch and the birds have started to sing along the usual smell of wet dirt. You can say it was a lazy start to a day of prohibition and moneyless, I have to find a way to put some bread in my mouth now that my money's confiscated. I could ask for a loan at Tanya or directly Henry's but I don't necessarily think that is what I want to do.

Not allowed to wandered anywhere in the inn, and probably shouldn't be free to roam around town after being arrested for thievery just yesterday. I ran out of options and would like to take a bath to rinse off all my hunger and emptiness. I got my old leather clothes out, once again heading North to the familiar pond, escapism is an acceptable coping mechanism, I suppose.

I opened the front door to a familiar face.

"The knight has returned to Deshla for his weekly duty!" Someone announced in the distance.

The knight in question, was the man who stood right at the door, also reaching to open it the same time as me, introducing Hewi Cocksworth. A very normal looking guy with a great physique and sky-blue hair.

"You got new clothes, Tanya No Lastname?" He asked

"You still wearing that armor, Hewi Cocksworth?" I answered, realizing he didn't smell like anything weird even though this is definitely the same armor he wore seven days ago, maybe iron armor just can't get smelly and I'm ignorant, he probably got different clothing inside...

"Indeed... Botol! Let me borrow our Tanya real quick, don't worry, I already looked at Deshla's water supply."

I turned around to look at Botol, who was squinting at us and left no comment but to just shrugged. And with that...

"Oh my..."

I was carried princess style against my will, one hand under my knees and the other on the upper half of my back, I looked up to see Hewi's smiling brightly as we made our ways upstairs. Am I just that light or people here are just that strong? All the men I've seen are more or less capable of making me a ragdoll, maybe women like Tanya or Silvia, too.

On our way to my room, I catch a scary glimpse of Amy and Sophia, staring at me, emotionless like dolls with their long black hair and green eyes from across the hall. But that thought was cut short when I was, INTENTIONALLY, dropped from great height above Hewi's head down to my bedsheet, it was not a hard surface like wood but definite not soft enough, and I groaned audible in great pain, maybe it was funny in his head but my day's ruined already.

"That hurts... I'm hungry... I just woke up and I want to take a bath." I whined.

"Ah, I'm sorry then, wanna grab lunch?" He asked, worried and confused shown.

"You should've asked before trying to get on top of me, no?" I answered, shaking my head, "No, I lost all my money just last night, so I can't eat anything right now, and I am not getting into any debts."

"So... Let me try to understand, you are going to starve yourself until death or until someone sleep with you and pay you? Why would you do that?"

"I do not know, but I guess it is something that is deep down inside my moral compass... You can say that I am a hypocrite, I still have half a tomato I can munch on, though."

With suspicion in his eyes, he looked at me up and down... As if wondering if anything I've said is true or not. The young knight sat down right beside me and asked to see my diary, the one that he gifted me, therefore, I showed it to him. He was, of course, clueless and couldn't read the English alphabet that I grew up with for fifty-ish years of my life. So I read it out to him

"Entry 1: She, the beautiful."

He sat there like an interested student investing in the wisdom that the teacher have brought, maybe a man with nothing else to do with his time but to spend it like a child listening to bed time story. I sat on my bedsheet while Hewi was on his back with his eyes closed, I soon got tired of sitting and laid down on his iron stomach as we reached Entry 3.

The room was silence, I probably talked to myself for at least an hour or two, reading everything out loud, so much so that my ears canceled out my own voice and all I could focus on while words was leaving my mouth was how windy today is and how nice the smell of after-rain was. I di not see a reaction from Hewi for the whole time, he stayed as quiet as a leaf in the cold forest and as we reached the latest Entry, Entry 8: Tough Situation; I looked at him for brief moment, but he opened his eyes, suggesting me to continue, so I did, finishing the whole diary. And, of course I skipped out everything about the Gaylord because I have vowed to keep a secret, even to a knight. But now on top of my stomach being unfulfilled, now my throat is dry, I think I would have eaten my own leg at the rate.

"The twins definitely was out to get you, Tanya. If what you're writing was true." Hewi commented.

"But I do not have any proof, nor can I do anything about it."

"I can, the authority of a knight exceeds that of the mayor."

"But that would be horrible, so please, do not. For no side would benefit from this, a lot will get hurt and change."

"... If that's what you want."

I nodded instead of an answer, and Hewi stayed quiet again, from staring into my eyes he looked at the sky outside my window and smirked.

"There we go, here is your 15Qo." Hewi suddenly said.

Obviously confused, I tilted my head slightly and didn't take his money, 15Qo is the charge I have for my service as a prostitute, but in no way this make sense.

"Why?"

"For your service."

"I would figured, yes. But, we barely moved for the last hour or so."

"Tanya No Lastname, you told me that prostitution is payment for time, I paid to lay on your bed resting my eyes while you tell me your stories, take it, no debts no nothing."

As of writing this, entry 9, I turned back to read the first three entries, and no, nope, I did not say that at all. But at the time I believed him, thinking maybe I just have a bad memory? Lying fuck got me.

"Haha... Thank you, Hewi Cocksworth, I'm starving and thirsty, I'm going to get water at the well and some bread at Henry's real quick for a tomato sandwich before I pass out."

And that was exactly what I did, I left Hewi in my room and paid my tax, 10Qo went towards Botol but 5 was enough to buy a loaf at Henry Hagglesack's for 3Qo. I couldn't stop the happiness surging so I took bites out of the big flavorless loaf in happiness while was still walking down the streets, by the time I was home to store the bread, my hunger was gone already .

"Thank you again, Hewi... To be honest with you, I thought my life would have ended today, or tomorrow if my stomach is resilient."

"You are thick in the head lady, if you'd rather die starving than to owe 3Qo." Hewi commented.

"Maybe... And was just thinking about how much of a hypocrite I am... I could have just refused the 15Qo you gave me, but I shaped my morals in a way to accept it without feeling guilty, but in fact... I should have not, what am I?" I sighed.

"Never have I thought I'd see a prostitute with existential crisis and moral dilemma." Hewi said.

"You understand those words?" I asked, though looking back; I may a bit cocky to the fact that people of these times did not have good education to be able to use words with more than 2 sounds.

"Royal academy's top class, but I'm weak in actual combat, hence why I'm here to cleanse water for a living." He explained.

"Ah, so a nerd?" I remarked.

"Shut up."

Hewi fidget around with my notebook, trying to decipher all the words I've written because I already read it to him, is it a habit of men? Because David did the same thing, maybe that's just what boredom gave after me not setting boundaries, but, I do not necessarily need to keep this a secret, except for when asked like in Entry 6 and 7.

 "I have a question, Hewi." I asked

"Yeah?" He answered

"How far is the extent of your water cleansing ability?"

"What do you mean?"

"Can you drink piss?"

"What kind of bloody question is that, I just laid down."

"It has been bugging my mind for a while now, figured now's the time to ask."

"Actually... That was a frequently asked question in training, and yes. But know that we can cleanse it, not purifying it."

"I do not understand the difference."

"Cleanse is an ability that protect affected from dirt, poisons, debuff and unholy effects, but not germs and living microcreatures."

"Ew." I expressed, to my understanding; his job is boiling mud water?

"We're trying our best." Hewi tilted his head in place of a shrug in response. "Say, do you have any plan for the day?"

"I was going to take a bath at the pond mentioned in my diary, but someone decided to break my hips by dropping me from height down to my bed."

"... I apologise, profusely. I thought your bed was softer than that."

"Reasoning not accepted, but forgiveness granted."

I sighed, laying down after releasing my inner rage, admittedly I was being unfair. Since my hips are fine and I was letting out my pent up frustrations over the last few days (mostly from David, Silvia, the twins and weird looks from the townfolks) onto Hewi. Which he didn't deserved. I looked at the young man in armor and instinctively plus randomly, reached my hand over to cup his cheek, then our eyes met. My blues to his blacks, he widened it for a moment, flattered, before putting it in a slight rest. I simply could not get enough of touching, and...

squish squish

I pinched Hewi cheeks, he didn't have much fat on his face but I can make do.

"You're weird in the head, Tanya."

"It's Tanya No Lastname."

"You're weird in the head, Tanya No Lastname."

"Hehe." I chuckled.

Hewi glanced his eye over at my hand that was on his face, noticing something, the young knight held it in front of us and examined closely.

"There are cuts... No, bite marks on your thumb." He asked, worries shown.

"I have been practicing."

"Biting your finger off?"

"Giving blowjobs."

I giggled as Hewi turned from a worried look to utter confusion.  I tried to hold back the laughter while elaborating.

"Like the journal mentioned, I tried my first time on Trek, but the young man was hurt so I practiced on my thumb until I can't feel my teeth anymore."

"So now you're capable of giving head?" Hewi squinted.

"If yours' the size of my thumb, yes. But I do got the general technique down." I answered

"... You should be proud. I could have never think about practicing something like that." He said.

"You want to give blowjobs too, Hewi? I could give you a general guide for some Qo." I smirked.

"Bloody yourself off." He answered with a laugh, which translated to a fuck off, I supposed.

We chill in quiet for some more moments in time, I, unconsciously since whenever, had laid my head down on Hewi's thigh so casually. We don't even know each other that much I supposed, but when I finally realized what I have been doing and looked up, the knight didn't seem to mind either. Resting his hand to scratch my hair while his eyes fixated on the diary, written in a language he could not fully comprehend.

I don't think I care about the notebook to the point of feeling anxious about it, so I started to feel bad, again about that time I yelled at Trek for snooping. Ever since appearing in this Tanya body, I have been able to easily detach myself from my possessions... Was it really this easy, always? But I was subject to not. I felt like, a weird sense of... surge of emotions, rushed through me again, nostalgia but right now, emptiness but not empty, romance but not loving.

"Hewi..." I whispered.

"I'm listening."

"I am going to take a bath, do you want to come?"