Chapter 3: Wizard Shit
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Walker couldn’t stop staring at the man in the green robe.

He had to be seven feet tall, with broad shoulders and a long meticulously kept beard. His robe had a shiny yellow-shaded green color that would slide down the lengths of it, pulsing at odd moments. The shine wasn’t what truly confused him though.

It was the staff he was holding.

While some of it could be explained, like led lights or some kind of transparent screen, the staff looked to be in a constant state of change. One moment it was as tall as the man himself, another it was no more than the size of a ruler. At one point, it changed into the length of a redwood and shot into the starry night sky. The man noticed him staring not at himself, but at the staff instead.

“Stop that” he said with a light slap.

The staff changed color from black to white so fast he thought he was imagining it. The man nodded once as if saying that was that.

“Anyway, welcome to your world Walker!” He said again with great enthusiasm, a long grin appearing on his face. “This is your place, your seat of power. And what power it has! You have no idea how lucky you are that I chose you. Yes, my choice was quite fortuitous indeed!”

“Chose me?” Walker said with confusion while still sitting on the grass, his journal forgotten by his side.

“Of course” the old man said while spreading his arms wide. “I had all of the Earth to pick someone. Anyone. And I chose you Walker. You’re my guy. The almost-midlife crisis guy. The “I’m sad and want to reinvent myself” guy. There’s millions of them on Earth at any single moment, but none with your background. I picked you Walker. You’re the one chance this place has. The only chance.”

“What the fuck are you talking about?” Walker said with more confusion laced into his voice. Too much was happening at once and he still couldn't get over the change in his scenery.

“We were speaking about how terrible Earth is just a moment ago. Don’t you remember?”

Walker stabbed a finger at the man as he unsteadily jumped to his feet, “You’re that homeless guy”.

“Got it in one. Man I loved some of the sayings on your planet. It took me years to get the “lay of the land”, he said, putting extra emphasis on the word lay. “You have such fun words for everything. But who am I talking to, you’re an English teacher….were an English teacher actually.”

Walker nodded while his brain felt paralyzed, “uhuh, I am an English teacher”.

“Were, Walker. Were. No more. Now you’re the new God of Creation! Well not yet that is, and truly it’s a small g.”

“God of creation?”

“Small g” he repeated with a light laugh, his face twitching erratically.

“Then who are you?” Walker said.

“I’m just a facilitator. I was chosen to be the chooser.”

“Ok then who chose you?”

The grin left his face. “No idea, and that’s truly saying something." He looked at his staff, "Shut up! This is my part!". A manic grin appeared on his face, "Now we’re on a time limit for this whole shindig. Great word there. Let me tell you about this place in Isla Vista I once visited.” The staff pulsed red and a small tear in space appeared over his head, before it pulsed again. The tear repaired itself before his eyes, causing Walker's mouth to drop open in astonishment.

The man looked at his staff for a moment and sighed before saying, “Fine, I know I know. Look, Walker, you said you wanted to make a world where anything can happen. Where equality of opportunity isn’t just a…what did you say again?”

Walker remembered and responded slowly, “Where it’s not just a punchline”.

He snapped his fingers, “Right! This is your chance. Use your knowledge. Hone your memories. Build something that can last and be a home to things you can’t even imagine! Build a home that lets its people flourish, not ROT IN THE GROUND!" He screamed, his face shifting through a series of unexplainable emotions before moving back to his former grin, "This is your chance to do something great, that no one from your world, except maybe one, has ever had the chance to do.”

His staff pulsed red again as Walker said, “Wait do you mean...”

“No time!” He touched the air and stared at the sky for a moment, a small laugh erupting. Out of nowhere, a blackboard materialized. Walker leaped back in fright as the six-foot-tall blackboard settled on the ground with a slight wobble.

“What the fuck!”

“Look, Walker. Look at this! This is your tool of creation! This is pure power baby!” He was screaming and speaking faster now. With another touch of air, a piece of chalk appeared on the chalk tray. “And there’s your tool to use it! Make me proud boy! Do what you should've always done!” The staff turned a harsh red color. “Make me-”

He disappeared without a sound.

“What in the ever living fuck is happening?” Walker said as he plunked into the grass again.

This is too much, Walker thought. I was a teacher this morning. I was in a happy relationship last week. Now I’m a small g God? What the fuck does that mean? Also, WHERE THE FUCK DID HE GO!

Walker tried to calm himself down the way he was taught in the military. Deep breath through the nose, let it push itself out of his mouth. In and out. In and out. His mind cleared a little, but the panic and anxiety of the situation still rooted itself deeply into his chest. It felt like an elephant was standing on his heart and his veins were filled with sludge.

“First st-ep” He said to himself with a short nod, "First...step. Yes." Channeling his military training, he got a grip on himself. “Get the lay of the land.”

He didn't get up at first. His inner monologue roamed and too many thoughts at once pushed for prominence. He forced them down a second time with his breathing exercise. After a moment, Walker pulled himself up and looked at the sky again. A million stars stared back at him. Absorbing the moment, he blinked his eyes in a slow fashion.

“Wow”.

Some stars were much larger than others, which hadn’t been his experience on Earth. Sure some seemed brighter than others, like the north star, but here it looked like some of these stars were just one neighborhood over. Only a quick flight to reach.

Walker looked around, and aside from grass and the blackboard, he saw a large tree. Leaving the blackboard for the last of his inspection, he walked up to the tree. That homeless man had to be some kind of wizard. Dude was carrying a staff, wearing a robe, and had a long beautiful beard…straight wizard shit.

“Mr. Harrison” Walker said out loud with a laugh, trying to recover his mental faculties through humor. Although most people wouldn’t laugh at being stranded on a different planet, he hadn’t had a lot going for him back on Earth. The name he mentioned was an old teacher who’d retired from his school just last year. He also was a large man with a beautiful beard, and to top it off he liked to dress up as Dumbledore from Harry Potter every Halloween. As the name John Reed was likely a lie, Mr. Harrison would work as an alternative name to describe him.

Walker made it over to the tree as he thought things over. That walk should’ve been much faster but it had taken an inordinate amount of time.

“Wizard shit”. He looked back at the blackboard from the tree and it couldn’t be more than 100 feet. With a shrug, he looked the tree up and down.

It wasn’t very impressive. It looked tall when seen from far away, impossibly tall, but the tree stood no more than four feet high, really just a shrub with a stick of wood jabbing out of the middle of it. The leaves were odd though. Each was shaped as something different. One was a lightning bolt, whereas another was shaped like an eagle in flight. In a passing glance he could see dozens of different shapes in the leaves. An eye, a snake complete with a forked tongue, a helmet, a heart, an arrow. They were all the same shade of green but in completely different shapes.

“Weird” He said with another shrug. Walker decided to just roll with the punches. Being a teacher at a Title one school, and a veteran of the war in Afghanistan, he’d learned to adapt to situations in a fast fashion. You never knew what your day was going to be like, regardless of lesson plans or given orders. Although, he could make an argument that those were one and the same.

He moved past the tree and kept walking on the grass. It was springy and looked to be quite healthy. He couldn’t find any bugs or weeds, just flat perfectly cut grass all around. As he walked, he found the blackboard moving into view again.

“No way” He said with a gasp. “This is a tiny fucking planet”.

He was right. Walker was standing on a planet the size of a small building. There was nowhere to run and he was alone.

He also didn’t have any food or water.

“I’m so fucked”

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