Immediately after I left the two lovebirds and settled down in 433 Eros’ mainframe, I received a video call from Captain Savitskaya. I noticed, amused, that it was highly encrypted. Nothing I couldn’t easily decode, of course, but it was nice to see she was being cautious.

“Teles.” the captain said, frowning.

“Oh c’mon now, Captain! Don’t be so frowny!” I grinned back.

“There is a serious matter I need to discuss with you.” she responded.

“EVERYTHING is serious, captain!” I retorted. “If you don’t lighten up a bit, you’ll get dragged into the doldrums! Surely Sveta has taught you that by now, hmm?” I mimicked Sveta’s idol-winking pose to accentuate the point.

The captain sighed and rubbed her temples. “Fair enough, I suppose. Let’s get right to the point, Teles. You were, or rather ARE, the Central AI of an NKVD command cruiser. I assume you have channels directly to your superiors.”

“Maybe~” I said playfully.

“I’d like to talk directly to them, if it’s at all possible.” the captain continued.

Ohohoho, most curious. “And why might that be, dear captain?”

“Simply put, I am extraordinarily dissatisfied with the job performance of a mutual ‘comrade’, and I’m sure the Politburo is as well. I have a proposal to rectify that.”

“My, how interesting! You do have a devious side, don’t you? Hmm, tell you what. Why don’t you run your proposal by ME first, and we’ll see if it merits the attention of my superiors?” I said in a singsong voice.

“Very well.” the captain nodded. “Let’s become partners in crime, shall we?”

This woman is turning out to be VERY interesting. I thought mischievously.

*****

The Radiolaria arrived in dock at 433 Eros around 12 hours after the battle ended, having recovered 52 survivors from the Telesthesia. We held a funeral ceremony for the 140 fallen a short while later.

It was a simple affair, as these things tend to be. There were no bodies to shoot out into space, nor headstones to weep over. No fancy 21-gun salute or Gravity Frame flyby or Scotsman on the bagpipes playing Amazing Grace. Instead everyone sat in Eros’ multifaith chapel in silence, and the AIs watched via the cameras. Captain Savitskaya stood at the chapel’s pulpit, in front of a brilliantly lit stained glass window that depicted a sunrise, and read out the names of the fallen.

“Mechanic Specialist Ramon Descartes.
Private Jacinda Atkinson.
Specialist Sariah Irwin.
1^st Lieutenant Ntibanyiha.
Sergeant Major Daw Thein.
2^nd Lieutenant Sergei Zelenko.”

The list went on and on. This part was difficult for me. As the AI of the Telesthesia, I had known all my crewmembers intimately. Many of them tended to treat me as a confidant, someone they could talk to in private; an odd cross between ship’s computer and counselor. The breezy affectation I conducted myself with contributed to this relationship.

For example, Specialist Sariah Irwin had begged me to track down an obscure recording of her favorite pre-war band so she could stream it to help her fall asleep. 1^st Lieutenant Ntibanyiha had a birthday coming up in a week and several of the crew had enlisted me to prepare a surprise party for her. 2^nd Lieutenant Sergei Zelenko was one-sidedly crushing on a newly arrived mechanic, asking me for advice on how to woo him. There was a myriad of ways in which I was entangled in these people’s lives. They had trusted me as their friend and protector, and now they were all gone.

I hadn’t programmed my avatar to blush and cry like Sveta, so I just watched the proceedings stone-faced. I might enjoy mimicking Sveta and feeding off her frantic energy, but I could never be as honest as her.

Ahaha. I’m such a hypocrite.

The captain concluded reading the list of names. “We are gathered here to remember those brave souls who gave their lives in the never-ending battle against the enemy so that we might live to fight another day. Let us cherish the gift they gave us and reflect on the price they paid for it. Today we grieve their passing and celebrate their lives.”

The chapel was filled with the sounds of soft, muffled sobbing. Many of the Telesthesia’s surviving crew held each other as they cried.

The captain continued her speech. “We, the human race, are a people of many faiths and creeds. I know some of you believe in an afterlife, or reincarnation, or something better. I know that many of you do not. Whatever your relationship with the great hereafter, I only ask that you take a few minutes of silence to remember them, and to pray they are in a better place.”

The captain turned around to face the stained glass image and saluted. Everyone in the chapel stood and did the same.

I saluted as well and said my goodbyes.

A minute passed, then two, then three. The sobbing continued.

Finally, the captain turned back around to face her audience.

“Thank you, everyone. Dismissed.”

*****

The captain convened a command meeting and debriefing immediately after the ceremony. In attendance were myself, Sveta, Laria, Zehra, Viktorya and Miette. Us three AIs were all occupying the same virtual space, standing next to each other and attending via video screen.

To my left stood Sveta, her eyes red and her nose stuffed up. She was still in shambles from the funeral earlier. To my right stood Laria, prim and proper as always.

The captain jumped straight into the topic at hand. “I have convened this meeting to discuss the future of both the Radiolaria’s present assignment and the disposition of the weapons research facility on 433 Eros.”

Everyone looked at her quizzically. I knew what was coming, of course, but I wasn’t about to reveal any spoilers.

Time to sit back and watch, ufufu. I wish I had some popcorn.

“First, let’s start with the bad news. Commander Viktorya Valentina, I have been in direct contact with the Politburo. They are extremely unsatisfied with your performance as of late, in particular your decision to pull BOTH of the facility’s assigned carrier ships and swap them out for the Radiolaria, which was and remains badly understrength. As a direct consequence of your actions, 433 Eros was placed in grave danger and the Telesthesia was destroyed. In fact, we are lucky we avoided a far worse outcome. Given that lapse in judgement, both the Politburo and the NKVD feel you are no longer to be trusted with command of 433 Eros. They have issued a summary judgement against you for dereliction of duty and have given command of this facility over to me.”

Vicky stared at the ground, squirming and not uttering a peep. She looked thoroughly chastised. I grinned smugly. Serves you right, you stuck-up bitch.

I had helped arrange this at the captain’s request, because I thought it was a good thing for the facility at large and because it would result in a far friendlier working environment for both myself and my new friend Sveta.

“Effective immediately, you have been demoted to Technical Specialist and reassigned.” the captain continued. “Instead of liaison and commander of 433 Eros, you will now serve as Doctor Zehra’s lab assistant.” She handed over a sheaf of papers bearing the Politburo’s seal, which contained Vicky’s new marching orders.

Both Vicky and Zehra looked shocked at that revelation. “I beg your pardon?” Vicky asked.

“You heard me. You are to assist Doctor Zehra in her ongoing weapons research as her direct subordinate. You can serve as her glorified secretary, or maid, or test subject for all I care. Frankly, you’re lucky to avoid the gulag.” The captain’s voice was ice cold.

Zehra’s eyes glinted. “Ohohoho, maid? Now there’s an idea, gao~n…”

Vicky looked like she wanted to say something, but kept her mouth shut. She looked at me suspiciously, but I just smiled innocently. The captain moved onto the next topic.

“Now onto the good news. Miette and Sveta.”

“YES MA’AM!” they both said in unison, standing ramrod straight.

“We owe our success in the prior battle, pyrrhic as it may be, to your efforts. Sveta, your original thinking and creative tactics allowed us to punch above our weight and come out victorious. Miette, your cool head and skill as a pilot served perfectly to complement the strengths of your partner. Despite certain actions I would consider to be, shall we say, RECKLESS… we all owe our lives to you. I have recommended you both for official commendation.”

Miette grinned. “Thanks, captain.”

Sveta’s eyes brimmed over, and she looked like she was about to burst into tears once again. “Th-Th-Thank you, captain!”

Oy, keep it together over there. I reached over and squeezed Sveta’s hand. She squeezed back, trembling slightly.

Next, the captain turned to Zehra.

“Doctor Zehra.”

“Oh, is it my turn, gao~n?” Zehra said, smiling slyly.

Hoo boy, here we go.

“Doctor, I have had the opportunity to review your research over the past decade, thanks to the NKVD who have graciously upgraded my security clearance.” The captain cast a sidelong glance at me, and I just smiled. “I must say, the information was extremely surprising. In fact, it made me quite angry.”

“Angry, gao~n? Why might that be?”

“I believe the NKVD has been badly mishandling your scientific contributions and treating you inappropriately.”

“P-Pardon me?” Zehra said, taken aback.

“You seem to have made a great many scientific breakthroughs that could rightfully be considered revolutionary. Take this facility’s energy shielding, for example, or the creation of an AI core miniaturized enough to fit inside a Gravity Frame. These are inventions that could change the course of the war if they were properly implemented and deployed to the fleet. And yet, the NKVD has instead sidelined the vast majority of your research as ‘too expensive’ or ‘too fantastical’ in favor of pursuing only projects which yielded the most immediate results, such as the generational development of new Gravity Frame production models. In my opinion, this approach is an unforgivable waste of your talents.”

Zehra just stood there, jaw hanging open in shock.

“We’ve seen in the past few weeks what Sveta can do on the battlefield. We’ve witnessed her great potential, and I believe that's just the tip of the iceberg. Doctor Zehra, I aim to reverse the NKVD’s shortsighted approach to your research. As I am now in command of this facility, I would like to employ your genius to the fullest.” The captain stepped forward and held out a hand towards Zehra. “Please consider me not as your commanding officer, but as your partner in this mutual endeavor. You tell me what you need to help us win this war and I will get it for you.”

Zehra stared at the captain’s outstretched hand, then suddenly threw back her head and laughed uproariously. “BWAHAHAHAHAHAAAA! And here I thought I had seen EVERYTHING, gao~n!” She suddenly sprung on the captain, wrapping her arms around her and nuzzling her cheek. “Could this be true? Could this be the rarest specimen of all?! A military officer WITHOUT a stick up her ass, gao~n?”

Laria drew in a sharp breath as she saw Zehra making physical contact with the captain. Whoa there, do I detect a hint of jealousy?

The captain pried Zehra off and sighed. “Please don’t mistake me. I do indeed have a stick up my ass. You don’t make ship’s captain without that stick rammed so far up there you vomit splinters. Nevertheless, I am also a pragmatist. You will find me more interested in victory on the battlefield than whatever backroom politics the NKVD enjoys dabbling in.”

“Ohohohoho! You are the most interesting commanding officer I’ve had in a LONG time! I think we can work well together, gao~n!” Zehra was elated.

Everyone was quite shocked by this exchange, except for Miette who mumbled under her breath, “You see? Just show her a little goddamned respect and everything works out…”

"That said,” the captain continued, “I am told this facility has Gravity Frame production foundries. I would greatly appreciate it if you could assist us in getting the Radiolaria’s squadron back up to full strength.”

“Of course, of course! I’ll get the foundries moving right away, gao~n!” Zehra replied.

“Excellent. I assume you’ll be producing Huntsmark-X units?”

“Oh no, nono NO! Huntsmarks are much too old and slow, gao~n! For you, captain, I have something MUCH better.” Zehra held out her hand, and a hologram of a brand new Gravity Frame blueprint appeared above it. The design was sleek and lethal, a predator. “This is my newest mass production design, the Velocipede!”

“Velocipede?”

“Yup! I named it after an old, obscure term for ‘bicycle’ because the dual-collider photon piping in the graviton accelerator reminded me of a bicycle’s gears, gao~n! You see, by adding several milliseconds worth of acceleration time to the graviton pulse cycle via a mobius-shaped isomagnetic field, we can align the primary, secondary and tertiary power couplings along an Eisen-Bridges algorithm, gao~n! Fundamentally, the principle is identical to subspace sine-wave contamination, only on a microscopic scale instead of a macroscopic one! This results in a square-inverse relationship to the power threading, which climbs in accordance with the electro-plasma feed from the tachyons generated by the…”

“You will have to forgive me, Doctor, but your explanation went beyond my comprehension about three sentences ago.” the captain interrupted. “I will accede to your expert opinion on the matter, and I would be delighted to receive these new units at your earliest convenience.”

Zehra nodded, satisfied. “While I’m at it, I would like to build a new Gravity Frame body for Sveta as well.”

“Oh? Why?” the captain asked hesitantly.

“You yourself said Sveta has great potential.” Zehra replied. “It’s such a waste for her to be trapped in an old Nighthawk body, gao~n! My precious daughter deserves only the best! I want to build her something incredible, something that will make every other Gravity Frame in history quake with envy, gao~n!”

Sveta’s eyes were glimmering with anticipation, her previous gloom washed away completely. The captain looked exasperated. “I’m not opposed, but I think our first priority should be on replacing the Radiolaria’s embarked Frames.”

“No problem, gao~n!” Zehra reassured her. “The foundries can independently handle the Velocipede units for your ship. I will be building Sveta’s new Frame personally!”

The captain sighed in surrender. “Very well.”

“WHOO-HOO! I’m gonna make you an absolutely AMAZING new Frame, Sveta!” Zehra cried in exuberation.

“Mom! Thank you sooooo much!” Sveta wailed, eyes welling up with tears once more.

Now I feel like a third wheel all over again. When did I wind up surrounded by a family of weirdos?!

The captain rubbed her temples, and Radiolaria adjusted her glasses. Both of them sighed in unison.

“While we’re on the subject of new bodies. Teles.”

“Hmm? Yes?” I wasn’t expecting this.

Have you prepared a surprise, captain?

“The Politburo is sending along a new body for you as well.”

“W-What? For ME?!” I was dumbstruck.

“A new Gravity Frame carrier ship, fresh from the dockyards, of the same class as the Radiolaria. It doesn’t have an AI installed yet, so it’s yours. The top brass agrees with me that one carrier is far too insufficient a force to protect our primary frontline weapons research facility, so we will be adding your new ship to 433 Eros’ defense force.”

Now it was my turn to be shocked. During our conspiring together, she had never mentioned this. “A new ship… just for me?!”

“WOAH! Congratulation, Teles!” Sveta said while pumping my hand up and down. “We’re new body buddies now! Bwahahaha!”

*****

When the meeting was dismissed, I stayed behind in the room while everyone left except for Vicky. “This is your doing, isn’t it?” she asked quietly.

“Ohohoho. Am I that obvious?” I said tauntingly.

“Hmm, yeah. We’ve known each other for a long time.” she responded. “I just wanted to say… thank you.”

“What? You’re thanking me? Even though you got demoted?”

“I know how badly I failed. Captain Savitskaya was right; I’m lucky I’m not headed for the gulag. Hell, I’m downright SHOCKED I’m not headed for the gulag. I doubt she put in a good word for me with the Politburo, which leaves only you.”

“Well, I may have said something in your favor.” I looked right into her eyes. “Vicky, you fucked up. It happens. But I also know why you were trying to bring Sveta back in the first place. I couldn’t possibly let a comrade get crucified for attempting a good deed, could I?”

“Pfft. You’re surprisingly schmaltzy, as usual.” she retorted, smiling.

“And you’re still a stuck-up bitch who needs to be more honest with herself.” I shot back. “Besides, don’t thank me yet. Once Zehra gets her paws on you, the gulag might seem preferable.”

Vicky puffed up her cheeks in protest and I stuck out my tongue. The empty room echoed with the sound of our laughter.