Mum let Stanley know I had permission and soon it was finally time for the tape to be shoot since the weather was good. He is giving out minor merch from his shop to avoid certain areas being used while Pat records our lines. It starts with Casper just doing some general skating on a basic line, nothing fancy just to show the basic skills, soon it expands to Ryan as well and getting more technical and finally it is my turn. I got told a set of instructions on what is wanted, to start with just dropping in, going back and forth a little, keeping it basic with a few stalls or plants before he gives me free reign. Honestly, when the leash is dropped the true skating comes out, this isn’t really just a normal tape but one to sell the product, I am not using Scarlet today but a fresh board just for this with his store logo on it. I did have to switch the trucks out but it is fine. I miss my own board, but the heart of a board is in the trucks not the decal.

Everyone is watching, since some of the park is basically shut down for us, the crowd is bigger. It is uncomfortable to be watched like this. If I was on Scarlet I would be fine but this is different, it feels a bit wrong. Still, I soon manage to shake it off and am relaxed enough to push myself. After finishing a pretty tiring line I stop at the top of a halfpipe signalling I need a break and drinking from my water bottle. He switches to Ryan and Casper while I recover. I watch carefully. Casper is a master of manuals and it is impressive watching him. I can’t really manual to save my life and here he is going from a trick to a manual to another trick to finish on a rail before landing. Granted, if I asked him to drop in he couldn’t really do that. It is interesting watching how we built up our styles. I got mine from basically just racing downhill, Casper apparently lived pretty isolated for a while and built his up on whatever he could, and Ryan just had access to this sort of place from the beginning.

Soon enough, it will be my turn. They want this recorded in a pretty short time frame, normally tapes would be done much more naturally hitting gaps or whatever is around that inspires them. I guess as I have become a vert skater I can just throw myself at a halfpipe and be recorded but it is still about pushing myself meaningfully not just practising.

I start getting a bit restless whenever I am sitting around but soon it is my turn again and it is back to the halfpipe. I feel very comfortable with what I am doing but not really inspired, after my latest run I think it is time.

“Hey Pat, you are only using a small amount for the ad tape, right?” I ask.

“We will cut it down a lot and use the best while showing off an increasing level of complexity, did you have something in mind?”

“I have been trying to push for something but I haven’t been managing it. I thought of trying it again, if that is okay?”

“Sure, just let me know when you are ready and I can get to recording,”

“I am good to go,” I say as I put my board over the edge. He gives me a thumbs up when he is in position and I start a line, it isn’t the most serious but about maintaining and trying to build up speed. Finally, I try the 360 and crash down hard.

“You okay?”

“Yeah, going to try again if that is okay?”

“Sure if you are up for it,”

I am pushing myself a lot and still failing, there should be usable footage in the build up but it feels wasteful, there are more lines from Casper and Ryan, Ryan does some amazing vert content too, but I am beating myself up that I still can’t master this trick.

“This should be plenty, thanks everyone,” Pat goes but I’m not satisfied.

“Can I have one more run?”

“Sure but just one, ‘bout to run out of tapes.”

I get to the top of the halfpipe and give the signal that I am ready and get one back from him. It starts clean enough, usual stuff and I just think about how it doesn’t matter if I make it or not, I managed to be a part of this, people are actually going to see me skate, I will get a new mag in a few days and it will be free. The best kind of mag really. I finally make my attempt and as I land it, I can’t help but think it is sketchy. I have to touch my hand to the ground to keep my balance as I even out again before coming to a stop.

“Rad, you got it Cel,” Ryan calls out bringing me into a side hug.

“It was sketchy, I don’t feel I did it,”

“Everyone gets sketchy landings on the first few times, you succeeded, that is what counts. Your hard work paid off,”

“I guess so, thanks” I flash a smile, I am not sure if it is a win, but yeah, I landed it without falling even if it wasn’t perfect. We all sit down as Pat starts to pack up.

“Shit, I am exhausted, I haven’t been able to skate that much in a day before, it is always switching out to let someone else have a turn.”

“Yeah, I know what you mean. Still, just being here feels right,”

“Yeah, this feels like home more than anywhere else,”

Next week, after I have finished skating, I drop in to get my first free magazine from Stanley. I still have Scarlet with me from going to the park.

“Celia, perfect timing, always just before closing. I have your mag and some tapes for you,” Stanley calls out, quickly getting up.

“Tapes? You know I can’t afford them too often,” I respond, getting a bit worried.

“Oh these are your tapes, free of course. I have a copy of the complete and extended ad tape but I put some stuff together for your first official tape, the Skater Celia tape,”

“Shit... that is rad,”

“You are a skater, don’t be so surprised. I saw the footage, impressive. Actually, next time you come pick up your mag, can you come say twenty minutes earlier?”

“Yeah sure,”

“I will see you then, I imagine I will be busy when this ad gets out,”

“Good luck,” I pick up my stuff and give a wave. It isn’t me being rude by not saying bye, this is just how we interact and if I get home too late I will be in trouble.