Day 1

Mark sat there for a moment and waited for the Hyper-Spiro to have any sort of effect on him. He waited for the hormones to hit system, to be struck by the inextricable urge to go shoe shopping and then go back to his apartment to watch Legally Blonde or Mean Girls or anything like that, but he didn't really feel that different. A little relieved that he was finally starting, but that was about it.

"So, how's it feel?" Abigail asked.

"Kinda underwhelming, to be honest." Mark said.

"Do I detect a hint of disappointment in your voice?" Abigail asked teasingly.

"No, I mean, I just thought it was going to hit harder, I guess." Mark said. "I thought changing my body chemistry would be a bit more...exhilarating."

"Well, hey, it's supposed to take like half a year." Abigail said. "Maybe you're not supposed to feel it all at once, you know?"

"Yeah, guess that makes sense." Mark said. He put the paper bag with the pills in the backseat and started the car.

As they drove back to Mark's apartment, Mark kept waiting for the hormones to really hit, for him to suddenly feel like a woman, but he still wasn't feeling anything except an inexplicable urge to pee. Eventually they arrived at Mark's apartment building, and Abigail got out.

"Ok, I'm gonna give the glasses to Stone." Abigail said. "And I'll poke around to see what Nathan's up to with this top surgery story. Oh, and before I forget." Abigail reached into her pocket and pulled out an SD card, which she tossed to Mark.

"This is the card from your camera. I'd start doing video diaries or something." She said. "It'd be good for the documentary if people got to see the changes bit by bit, you know?"

"Yeah, makes sense." Mark said.

"Well, I'm gonna head out. Lemme know if you ever need anything." Abigail said. With that, she turned around on her heel and walked off to find her car. Mark grabbed the paper bag, walked into the apartment building and took the elevator up to his floor. He stepped into his apartment and took a deep breath. This was it. He was actually turning himself into a woman. If if he couldn't feel it, the hormones were probably already at work in his body.

Mark decided that it'd be best to try and act like everything was normal. He took out the pill bottles and set then next to his bathroom sink. He took a picture of the bottles and sent them to Stone. Stone called back practically nanoseconds after he sent the pictures, and Mark picked up.

"Hello?" Mark said.

"Gonna be honest, Mark." Stone said. "A part of me thought you weren't gonna be willing to do this when push came to shove, but you proved me wrong."

"Thanks Boss." Mark said. "Already took my first dose too."

"Really? Do you feel any different?"

"Uh, no." Mark said. "It doesn't really feel like I'm changing all that much yet, but maybe it just hasn't hit."

"Hmmmm." Stone said. "Well, keep me updated. I assume Abigail has the footage?"

"Yes sir, she's on her way to you with it right now."

"So?" Stone said. "Was the clinic as bad as we feared?"

Mark considered his next words carefully. The whole point of this was exposing the trans agenda, but the people at Everhope had been really good to him. He didn't want to rope them in with any sort of gender radicals, but he didn't want his boss to think he was being too soft on trans people as a whole, and god why was his life becoming so complicated?

"Uh, well sir, to be honest I think I went to one of the good ones." Mark said. "Now, I'm sure there are people out there just giving away those estrogen and testosterone shots, I mean heck, look at that story Nathan just did, but the people at Everhope were very professional about the whole thing." Mark went on to recount his whole experience at the clinic, and Stone never said more than 'Uh-huh" and "Hmmm" the whole time.

"Well," Stone said. "But I betcha those glasses caught something you didn't."

"You think so, sir?" Mark said.

"Yeah, we'll find something we can nail them with." Stone said. "Just focus on yourself in the meantime.  Let me know if you need anything, Owens."

Stone hung up. Mark set his phone down and went to his mirror. There still wasn't anything there; no feminine glow, no thick and shiny hair, no softening of his jawline, nothing. He frowned, and decided to just try and act normal until he noticed something.

He went to his kitchen and made some tortellini. He made a double portion, keeping in mind what Daniels and the pharmacist had said, but he could only finish about three quarters of what he'd made. He packed the rest in a Tupperware container to eat the next day.

Once he was done he walked into his bedroom and got his camera set up on his desk, like he was filming a normal vlog.

"UH, hey, this is Day 1 of HRT, took my first dose of Hyper-Spiro just after leaving the clinic." He said. "Uh, I haven't noticed any effects yet, nothing mental or physical, but it's only day one, so that's probably not gonna be the case for much longer. Hopefully Day 2 will be more interesting."

He turned off the camera and put it away, and then he sat down, waiting for something to happen. He knew it was stupid to expect some sort of Sailor Moon-esque transformation, but he was expecting more than just an anxiousness for the changes to start already.

He was startled by the sound of thunder. He looked out his window and saw that he'd been so wrapped up in his own head he hadn't even noticed that it had started to rain. He decided to just find something to do already. He browsed his bookshelf and found a book that felt appropriate for a dark and stormy night: Jonathan Strange and Mr.Norrell. He'd picked up the book years ago, but had never gotten around to it. Now he had nothing but time to catch up with stuff like this.

He took a quick shower (examining his body closely as he did so), changed into some pajamas (which felt luxurious against his smooth skin, and thus made Mark hope that this HRT really did stop his body hair from growing back so fast) and climbed into bed to read. He ended up getting to the part where a magician brought the stonework of a cathedral to life before he nodded off to sleep.

Day 2

Mark woke up feeling particularly exhausted. He crawled out of bed, went to his bathroom and did his normal morning routine: brush, shave, moisturize (which he'd been doing a lot more since that night with Abigail), but he couldn't help but feel like he was forgetting something. That's when he noticed the pill bottles next to the sink. "Oh, right." he said. He took out a Hyper-Spiro pill and swallowed it. Then he commenced an examination of his body. After finding nothing worth writing home about he put on some casual clothes and started his day.

As he sat in his living room eating breakfast he kept waiting for some sudden wave of femininity to wash over him, because that's how this whole thing is supposed to work, right? He figured that maybe he'll start really feeling feminine once he started taking the estrogen, and he didn't stop to consider why he wanted to feel feminine so bad.

For now Mark was stuck in the same routine that he'd been in during the week leading up to his appointment; sit on the couch, watch Netflix, play video games, wait for boobs. He periodically checked his phone to see either Abigail or Stone messaged him, but there was nothing but radio silence from his colleagues.

After lunch he decided to get off the couch and get some exercise. He went to his closet and pulled out a folding exercise mat he'd gotten years ago. He set it up in the living room and went through his normal routine of pushups, crunches, and squats. Mark greatly preferred working out alone over going to the gym. The gym was always loud, always smelly, and the guys there were always competing with each other. It was all in good fun, but Mark just wanted to focus on maintaining his health without feeling pressured to break his PRs or whatever.

Once he was done he went to the bathroom to shower. As he began to take off his clothes, he thought about how he always hated this part, he always smelled s0-

Wait.

Something's different. He thought.

He pause for a moment, trying to figure out why something felt off, and that's when he connected the dots.

I can't smell myself.

He raised his arms, and his nose was not assaulted by the vinegary smell that they normally produced after rigorous exercise. Instead, Mark picked up a very faint fruity scent that wasn't even that bad. It was as if Mark was wearing deodorant even when he wasn't.

"Oh, I can get used to this!" Mark said.

Day 3

Yup, his skin was definitely getting softer.

He poked at his thigh as he sat on the toilet. It was just a bit squishier than he remembered it being before all this. He rubbed his face; yeah, there was definitely a bit more fat there too. His skin also felt like it was starting to become less oily and clearer, like how it felt right after he moisturized.

He looked over at the pill bottles. He'd already taken his Spiro, but now it was time for the real deal. Hyper-Estrogen.

He got up off the toilet, washed his hands and picked up the bottle. He took out of the the pills; it was a small teal circle. One that would bring on the real changes.

Mark put the pill under his tongue and began to feel it dissolve. He stood there for a minute before realizing this was gonna take a lot longer than he thought, so he wandered into his living room and pulled out his phone. It looked like he'd gotten a text from Abigail in the middle of the night.

Abigail: Yo I think I got something with this whole Nathan story. Call me when you can.

Mark nervously waited for the pill to finish dissolving so he could call. Once he felt the last bit of it dissolve, he hurriedly found Abigail in his contacts and called.

"Hey Mark." Abigail said. "I think I got some tea for ya."

"Lay it on me."

"Ok, so I was appearing on this show y'all do, the uh, the book club one."

"Text Not Subtext?"

"That's it, and Nathan was gonna use the studio after us, so once we were done I managed to catch him as he was coming in and I asked him about the top surgery thing."

"And, what'd he'd say?"

"That's the thing, he was real cagey about it. He said he was just protecting everyone's privacy, which I guess makes sense."

"Hmmmm...."

"What is it?"

"Nathan's never really shown that much concern before. He's usually willing to call out stuff like specific hospital and surgeons and stuff who do this sort of thing, even though Legal hates it."

"Want me to keep digging?"

"Yeah. Maybe ask Stone about it, see f he caught any of those red flags."

"Will do. How you feeling?"

"Oh, like an absolute doll."

"Really?"

"No, not really. Just took my first dose of estrogen, though. I keep waiting for to like, feel feminine but it hasn't happened yet."

"Do you...want that to happen?" Abigail asked.

"I mean....kind of?" Mark said. "I'd feel like it'd make this whole thing a lot easier if the E really helped me feel like a woman, you know?"

"Mark, lemme tell you something." Abigail said. "There isn't a woman out there who 'feels like a woman' by just laying around playing video games."

"I'll have you know that I'm watching a movie, thank you very much."

"Point is, if you want to feel like a woman you got to proactive about it." Abigail said. "Want me to come over and give you a makeover?"

The proposition made Mark's heart beat like a jackhammer. Abigail, coming over and putting on makeup and painting his nails and doing his hair and-

"Mark, you still there?"

Mark shook his head. "Yeah, yeah sorry, I was just thinking about if I wanted to do that."

"And?"

Mark squirmed a little. "I dunno...I think I want to let the hormones do their thing for a little bit. I don't wanna look like...like..."

He knew he was gonna say, he knew he was trying to say like a man in a dress, but why was it so hard to say when that's what he would be?

"Ok, I get it." Abigail said. "We'll wait until you're properly voluptuous to do you up."

Mark didn't know why but the idea of being voluptuous of all things was incredibly exciting to him. "Thanks Abigail. For everything."

"Anytime." She hung up.

Mark felt something on his face. He reached up a touched a wet spot on his cheek.

Was he crying?

Day 4

Turns out crying could feel really good.

Mark knew it was his hormones changing, but he was starting to feel so much more now. It was like all the emotions he'd felt before hand had been filtered and diluted before reaching his brain, but now he was getting them straight from the source.

He'd first started crying yesterday after thinking about how sweet Abigail was being throughout this whole thing, including looking into whatever was going on with Nathan.  It'd felt so cathartic to just cry with no one to judge him for it, and no one could tell him 'boys don't cry' because, well, he didn't have the body chemistry for that excuse to make much sense, even if he still was a boy deep down.

But then thinking about Nathan had gotten him super angry at him, thinking about how he'd spent years trying to one-up him only to watch the subscriber gap grow larger and larger, and then thinking about that made him think about this project and how excited he was to be doing it, and it just kept going like that all day. But this emotional roller-coaster didn't feel exhausting or annoying; it was exciting for Mark, a chance to really understand women's emotions.

Not that he was a woman or anything like that. 

But that's how he ended up here, browsing his various streaming services until he could settle on a movie that would turn on the waterworks. He was cradling a plate of stirfry as he did so; He'd been worried that he'd forget to eat the nutrients required or something like that, but turns out his body was very good as telling him that he needed food constantly.

He eventually settled on Titanic; He'd seen it years ago because that was just one of those movies everyone was supposed to watch at some point, but he wondered if it would hit differently now.

Day 5

It did indeed hit different.

Mark had sobbed himself to sleep on the couch after finishing the movie, but he woke up feeling better for it. It was so good to feel like he was actually reacting to things properly instead of feeling some combination of neutral or angry all the time.

He got up to shave and realized that it had taken his hair a day longer to get the point that he felt like he had to shave it. Guess he was lucky enough to get the slow body hair thing, which made him happier that it probably should have.

However, he woke up to notice something very different; his chest, and his nipples especially, were feeling incredibly sensitive. He could feel the way his shirt moving across that region of his chest constantly, and once he was done with his shower he decided to go shirtless for the foreseeable future until that region of his body decided to calm down.

There was a logical part in the back of his brain trying to tell him exactly why his chest felt like this, but he tuned it out. It was way too early for any changes like that to start happening.

Right?

He went to his phone to distract himself and decided to text Abigail.

Mark: Hey Abigail

Abigail: Hey what's up

Mark: Nothing much. Just rewatched Titanic.

Mark: except this time I was SOBBING

Mark: You ever see people cry in one of those Ghibli movies?

Mark: it was like that

Mark:

Abigail: LMAOOOOOOO

Mark: It's not funny

Mark: But it was very satisfying

Mark: I've never cried at a movie before.

Abigail: Must be the 'mones

Abigail: I was like that during puberty

Abigail: You learn to deal with it

Abigail: Oh

Abigail: I have something to tell you

Mark: Is it that you got that meeting with Stone?

Abigail: Yes

Abigail: I was just upfront about it with him, was like "Hey something's fishy here" and he just said the same thing as Nathan

Abigail: Protecting people's privacy, respectful, yadda yadda

Abigail: He did say that Nathan had like, verified the source was legit with him tho

Abigail: so i'm not sure if this story is real or if they're both in on it or if Nathan managed to fool him or what

Mark: Dang, though we'd be able to nail Nathan with something

Abigail: If it's any consolation this has made me only more convinced that he's faking it

Abigail: it's too suspicious

Abigail: But I'm new around here, I don't have any weight to throw around.

Mark: What're you playing at?

Abigail: Well

Abigail: Since you asked

Abigail: why not come down and play detective?

Abigail: You'd get more people to talk.

Mark: Oh

Mark: Um

Mark: I'm not sure if I'm comfortable going out right now

Mark: Plus everyone except Nathan and Stone think I'm dealing with serious health stuff.

Abigail: That's fair

Abigail: Oh

Abigail: Maybe you could just go over to Nathan's place

Abigail: Use your newfound feminine wiles

Mark: LOL

Mark: I can assure you that i have no such thing

Mark: Not yet anyway

Abigail: So you're saying you wouldn't be opposed to using them, you just don't have them

Mark: I ain't ready for this conversation

Abigail: I'm just teasing.

Mark: I'll just talk to Mr.Stone about it.

Mark: Laters.

Abigail: laters.

Mark went to his contacts and found Mr. Stone.

"Hey, Owens, how are ya?" Stone said.

"Uh, well, I think the changes are really starting to kick in." Mark said."Been crying a lot."

"Uh oh," Stone said, "you're not getting hysterical on me are you?"

Mark knew he meant it as a joke, but something about that comment stung. "No sir, I'm handling it just fine. Physical changes are slow going though; my skin's softer and my body hair is growing back slower but that's about it."

"Well, glad to hear you're holding up trooper." Stone said. Mark couldn't help but pick up an edge in Stone's voice.

"Something wrong, sir?" Mark said.

"Well," Stone said with a sigh, "I've had the boys in Legal comb through the glasses footage like it was the Zapruder film, and we just can't find anything to nail that clinic on."

"Oh, no." Mark said, trying his best to sound disappointed. While the radical trans mob was most definitely out there, he didn't think the people at Everhope were really part of it, so he was glad they'd be spared from Stone's wrath.

"Yeah, it's all legit." Stone said. "I watched the whole thing myself, and, well, it seemed just like a normal doctor's visit. Doesn't give us a whole lot to work with. I'm thinking we can either have the boys in editing chop it up a little to make it seem quicker than it was-"

"Well," Mark interjected, "wouldn't that be a bit...dishonest?" He instantly regretted it. His mouth seemed to be running faster than his brain could keep up; he had no idea why he called out his freaking boss now of all times, but he had felt an instinctual urge to object to Stone's suggestion. Thank you, inner journalistic integrity,  for being so inconvenient. Mark thought.

"Kid, if we don't mess with this stuff in post we ain't gonna have a story to work with." Stone said.

"Sure we will!" Mark said.  "I mean, I've been recording these daily video diaries, and I've been doing stuff like talking about how I'm crying way more and I'm getting less masculine and stuff. So maybe we can focus on like, how dangerous the hormones themselves are." That's when Mark got an idea for a killer segue.  "I mean heck, Nathan already running stories about like, that kid who got top surgery so maybe we can just let him go after the clinics."

Stone was silent on the other end for what felt like an eternity. "Ok, I see what you're getting at Owens." he said. "I think we can make that work."

Mark held the phone away from him and let out a sigh of relief. Looks like Daniels, Steph and Amy would be safe from Stone's army of lawyers and Muckraker's loyal fans for a little while longer.

"Although, speaking of which, I wanted to bring something up with you." Mark said. "It's about Nathan's story--"

"Oh?" Stone said.

"Well sir, it just doesn't seem to meet our usual standards." Mark said. "Nathan doesn't give any information about the mom, the girl, the clinic who did the surgery, anything. We go after the mainstream media all the time when it comes to using 'anonymous sources', but isn't this just doing the same thing?"

"Listen, son," Stone said. "When NBC and CNN and all those other three letter agencies do it, they're just trying to keep the public from questioning things. When WE do it, we're protecting the privacy of a mother during a very difficult time in her life."

"Oh, um, yeah, I guess that makes sense." Mark said.

"But I can assure you that Nathan came to me with this, and it all looks legit. We're just trying to not let people dogpile and this mom and her kid. That's all it is, Owens."

Mark nodded to himself. Yeah, yeah that makes sense. Nathan's a douche, but he's number one, he wouldn't fake a story while he was king of the hill; it'd be such a stupid move!

"Ok, thanks boss." Mark said. "Whole thing made my inner journalist a little suspicious."

"Understandable." Stone said. "That kind of dedication is exactly why you're the man for this gig."

That man Stone threw in there stung Mark a little for some reason, but he brushed off the feeling. "Thanks boss, I appreciate the compliment. Talk to you later."

Mark hung up the phone and went to the bathroom for a full body shave.

Day 6

Mark was staring at his face, trying to figure out why it felt so familiar and so different at the same time.

He knew that his face was starting to really feminize, his jawline didn't look as defined as it had in that first video he'd recorded, and his skin wasn't as oily as it had been, but he didn't look like a bombshell or anything. He looked like a REALLY feminine man, but still recognizably a guy.  But he couldn't deny that he was looking different. It was a weird transitional (Ha! Mark thought) state that he was eager to get past.

He checked more of his body. He chest still felt very sensitive, and he noticed that his nipples were like, rock hard now. They were a part of his body that he'd never paid much mind to considering that they were 100% vestigial, but now they were feeling everything; his morning shower had been rudely interrupted by the fact that the hot water felt like a million little needles hitting his chest.

As he examined himself, he realized something he'd been neglecting a part of his body he'd never expected to neglect.

He looked down into his pants, and too his relief his package hadn't shrunk down to a nub while he wasn't looking. However, he realized that he hadn't really felt it do much of anything this last week. He hadn't woken up with morning wood since starting the hormones, and he was actually quite glad about that once he thought about it; the idea of it not getting up at the slightest provocation anymore felt like it'd be pretty convenient, actually.

He thought about what Daniels had said about atrophy, but he didn't really feel like doing anything to stop that. Not right now anyway; anything involving that part of his body had always felt like a chore, so he wasn't that eager to engage with it when it wasn't demanding his constant attention for once.

But since the Nathan thing had been mostly settled he didn't really have much to do anymore. He put his shirt back on (a loose fitting and baggy one that didn't rub up against his chest that much) and sat down at his computer.

He went to the Everhope website and found their email address.

He opened up a new email and wrote "Need Help with Voice Training" in the subject line.

It was something he was going to have to get to eventually, and he had nothing but time these days, so hey, why not? It can't be that hard, right?

Day 7

Mark woke up in his bed and yawned, then he did some hums till he found his head voice. He'd spend most of yesterday going through the YouTube links the clinic had sent to him, which were mostly all video by trans women on how to get a 'passable' female voice. That had turned into a rabbit hole of various throat muscles and sound jargon that he was just beginning to understand. He had found a few tutorials that boiled everything down to a few simple exercises, so he had just spent most of yesterday running through those. The one thing that all the tutorials had emphasized was constant practice, so Mark had resolved to maintain 'girl voice' as much as possible.

He got out of bed, lightly singing to himself (another suggestion by the ever-wise trans women on YouTube) and went to his bathroom. He knew he was on an accelerated timeline, but he was still surprised by just how much he was changing day by day. His skin was so much clearer and softer, and he spent a minute just running his hands over his face, enjoying the sensation. He ran his hands over his legs and arms, delighting in how the hair there was taking longer to grow back.

He managed to keep his hands off himself for just long enough to take off his shirt, prepping himself for his morning routine, when he felt a slight jiggle and froze.

No way. No way no way no way, this soon?

Mark finished taking off his shirt and looked at his chest. There was no doubt about it.

He had breast buds.