As my Valkyrie sisters and I headed towards the feasting halls, I felt Siri chuckle, and knew something was up.

 

                What gives, Siri?  I asked mentally.

 

                *You’re about to be hazed, Sannyr.*

 

                I kind of expected something like that.

 

                *Not like this.  Do you know what Valkyries are expected to do when we’re not at war, and feasting?*

 

                Umm... No.

 

                *We serve the Einherjar food and drink – meat and mead – in Valhalla.  Some even see to other needs of the Einherjar, if they so wish – if you know what I mean.  We have so much power over the Einherjar, and so much responsibility that in this way we remember our humility and that we could not do what we do without them.*

 

                So we’re magical warrior waitresses?  What the hell?

 

                Siri giggled, and I could almost feel her mentally nod.  *Sort of.  We’re hostesses, and the Einherjar are in our hall.  We see to their needs, and they fight and die and are reborn each dusk for Asgard.  Normally only the newest Valkyries spend their time being servers – but all of us have our part to play.  And since you’re one of the newest of us, tonight you get to serve.*

 

                Oh.  So is it raucous?

 

                *It can be.  Just try to take it with good graces.  Oh – because of your rank, you won’t be serving the rank and file.  The Twelve’s responsibility is to serve the Aesir directly.  You’ll be pouring the Allfather’s mead this evening...* Siri giggled.  *They’ll probably try to treat you a bit like a wench – so just roll with it – you might even have fun!  It’s a rite of passage that all Valkyries have to do – and each time we bond with a new host, we do it again.  Many of us really enjoy it.  I spent twenty years serving in Valhalla when I was young, and still have fond memories of it.*

 

                As I walked, I could feel the warm feeling that Siri had for those years – but I couldn’t remember much of them.  She’s hiding them from me, I thought.  Minx!  

 

                I tried to keep my composure as we finally reached the doors to Valhalla – and I stopped in shock.  The feast was already begun – and tens of thousands of Einherjar were sat at tables – endless rows of tables, laden with food, beer, mead, and meat.  The warriors had already begun their feasting, and many Valkyries were hustling about, ensuring the men’s food and drink did not run out.  It was the epitome of an archaic medieval feast – with warriors eating raucously, sharing tales and friendship – and the Valkyries tending their charges. 

 

                Jhaele elbowed me, and nodded towards the feast.  “It’s something else, isn’t it?”

 

                “Definitely.  Where do we sit?”  I asked, playing dumb.

 

                “Oh – we don’t sit.  Tonight we serve – and after the feast we gather to eat and talk and share gossip.  Tonight you’ll be tending the High Table, with the rest of the Twelve.  You’ll be pouring mead for the Lords and Ladies!  Surprise!”

 

                Even being warned by Siri in advance, I wasn’t prepared for the sight I beheld.  Some of the Valkyries were being manhandled – and some of them obviously were enjoying it – while others were serving with good humor, or swift efficiency.  I could see the High Table in the distance – and I realized my role tonight would be waitress.  I grinned.  I can do this, I thought.  I was a waiter at Hank’s BBQ shack for over two years – one recently and one before I left for college.  This can’t be THAT different?

 

                “Go get ‘em, Sannyr!”  Lashawna laughed.  “Try to have fun with it.”

 

I nodded, and made my way towards the High Table, leaving my sisters behind.  I tried to count the Gods I would be serving tonight – there were so many!  Odin himself, and his wife Frigg, Freya and her brother Freyr, Thor and Sif, Heimdall and Loki, and a host of other gods – some known well on Midgard, and some I didn’t recognize.  I think I spied youthful Idun amongst their ranks, and Hod – the blind archer who was destined to slay Baldur, and there, shining with an inner light was Baldur himself.  As I approached he caught my gaze, and smiled – and I instantly became aroused... and wet in places I’d rather not deal with...  His charisma and sex appeal was unbelievable – and I knew at that moment, if he wanted me, I would take to his bed even with my misgivings and discomfort being the fairer sex.  He was too beautiful – it was almost impossible to resist his glory. 

 

I broke his gaze, and felt myself return to a more normal state of being, but the feeling of being sexually excited – by a man no less – shook my resolve.  I forced myself to continue, and headed up to the High Table.  It’s only hazing, after all... Right?

 

*Sannyr, just remember this is a fiction, to conceal your true identity until they are ready to announce you as one of the Asynjur.  They may prank you, but they would not take advantage of you in that way – where they might if the Valkyrie in question was willing.  Eternity is long – and the Aesir and Asynjur have long memories.  A wrong done to you now might come back to haunt them ten thousand years later.  They know this – and will act accordingly.  Probably.*

 

Probably?!

 

*Well, they are Gods.  They do like getting their way now and then.* Siri quipped.  *Besides, you might like it.*

 

                I gulped nervously, and stepped forward.  “My Lords, my Ladies, how may I serve you tonight?”

 

                “Get over here and fill my mug, Sannyr!”  Odin called, motioning for me to stand before him and his wife Frigg.  “Tonight we welcome Sannyr to our table!  One of our newest – and yet highest ranking Valkyries!  Tonight, she shall serve us all food and drink, and be initiated as her sisters have been since time immemorial!  Come, lass!  Fill my cup!”

 

                One of the other Valkyries – Siri’s memories told me her name was Göll – handed me a pitcher of mead, smirking cockily.  “Good luck, Sannyr.”  She whispered, and patted me on the butt to shoo me over.

 

                Here goes nothing, I thought, gulping nervously.  I took the pitcher of mead, and approached my Lord Odin, who was watching with a mischievous twinkle in his eye.  “My lord, may I have your cup?”

 

                “Aye, lass!”  He said, laughing, and held it forth, holding it as I poured.  Soon his mug was full, and I turned to fill his wife Frigg’s mug – and felt myself being hoist onto a lap – the Allfather’s lap! 

 

                “Come, lass!  Help me drink this fine mead!”  He held the horn of mead out to me – and I took it – and for the next few moments, I held the horn to his lips while he drank, until the horn was drained dry. 

 

My face burned red with embarrassment, as I filled the mug again – and this time the Allfather had me drink with him, as I wriggled in his lap, trying to escape.  Finally, with the second mug drained he released me, and I stood and smoothed out my garments, trying to reclaim some measure of composure.  Odin chuckled – as did his wife Frigg and some of the other Aesir, and I realized this wenchly teasing was my hazing. 

 

“Now, don’t you tempt my husband, Sannyr.”  Frigg laughed.  “I might let you keep him!”

 

“Now dear, do I deserve that barb?”  Odin asked sadly.

 

“Aye, all that an more, my husband.  Just remember who is your wife.”  She said smirking.

 

“Aye, Frigg.  Your shrill tongue is ever a reminder.”  Odin replied with a grin.  “Mine and mine always.”

 

I couldn’t help but grin at their banter – it was obvious their harsh scolding of each other was in jest.  So this is what I’m supposed to do, then?  I wondered.  Fine, I can play along...  I stiffened my spine, and got to business – and for the next hour and a half, I did my best at flirting, pouring mead and ale for the Aesir, and trying to keep them well fed and entertained. 

 

I jumped the first time my butt got groped – by Vili, Odin’s youngest son, but the second time, when Thor himself dared, I hauled off and slapped him so hard I left a red hand imprint on his ruddy cheek.  The room went silent, and I stood, still as a mouse in a cattery - until both Thor and Sif broke into gales of amused laughter – and Sif complimented me on my backhand.  After that, the evening went more easily.

 

I sat in several more laps as well – Tyr, Njord, Freya, and Vidar were the main conspirators.  Finally, I came to Loki, who seemed pleased I had left him for almost last.  I had been avoiding one god in particular as much as I could, which was Balder.  His sheer glory made it hard to be around him.

 

“Sannyr.”  Loki said, chuckling.  “How has your evening been?”  He held out his drinking horn, and I filled it – by now I could do it without spilling a single drop.

 

“It has been an experience, My Lord.  A very handsy experience.”  I smirked.

 

“Aye.  And I shan’t treat you the same – but I would like to know if you would do me the honor of sharing my bed tonight, like in older times.”

 

I looked askance as his request – a little shocked, to be honest.  “Please forgive me, My Lord, but I am not interested at the moment.  My own problems weigh upon me, and I fear sharing a bed with any man would be too much to bear.”

 

Loki smirked, and suddenly the raven haired man was replaced by an equally stunning and sexy raven haired woman – his outfit now a green and gold gown that accented her body wonderfully.  “And If I weren’t a man?”  She asked.

 

I looked at Loki, in his stunning female form, and I realized I didn’t want her.  I didn’t feel lust – oh, I could appreciate her beauty and allure, but I didn’t lust for her.  I shuddered to think of what that meant for my own feelings and choices, but I pushed it aside, and shook my head.  “The answer is still no, My lord.  It is a problem within me.”

 

“Fair enough.”  Loki laughed throatily.  “Can’t blame a girl for trying.”

 

I nodded, and moved on to my final challenge... Balder.  Thankfully, Balder had dimmed his glory, and I could approach him without losing myself to my baser emotions.  “Would you like your cup filled, My Lord?”

 

“Aye, Sannyr.  If I didn’t know better, I’d think you were avoiding me this evening.”  He replied, smirking.

 

“If I have, Milord, it is because I know I could not resist your allure, should you choose to reveal it.  You are the most handsome being I have ever seen, and should you ask, I could not say no.”  I replied, while filling his mug, and fetching him some more succulent foods.

 

“That is why I would never ask.”  He said quietly.  “I would not take what was not offered freely.”

 

“Thank you, My Lord.”  I replied honestly.  “I appreciate that greatly.”

 

“Sannyr, this is meant to tease, not to be an ordeal.  You have done admirably.”

 

“Aye!”  Odin called out.  “You have weathered our gauntlet well, lass, and have bourne our ill manners with grace!  You have done well.  You may rest, and eat with your sisters!”

 

“Thank you, Lord Odin.  I was glad to serve you all.”

 

“So you’ll be here again tomorrow?”  Balder asked with a devastating smile that made me weak in the knees.  “I wouldn’t mind a little more of your attention.”

 

“We... We’ll see, Milord.”

 

Laughter from the gathered gods and goddesses rang around – their good humor taking the sting of the laughter out, and making it a pleasant jest.  Balder nodded – and I got the distinct impression that he might be hoping for me to freely offer something to him, something I wasn’t ready to give to anyone yet.  Huh.  Why me?  He could literally have anyone here.  It was flattering and frightening at the same time... frightening because I could see myself giving in easily if I let myself be tempted, despite my misgivings.

 

Since I was dismissed, I quickly but politely took my leave, and retired to the kitchens, where dozens of my Valkyrie sisters were already gathering to eat and drink, and gossip.   Of course, the topic de jour was my travails at the high table – and many jests were made at my expense about the many propositions and opportunities that passed me by.

 

We gossiped long into the night – but honestly, my thoughts were elsewhere.  I was distracted by my feelings – these strange feelings I had begun to feel around certain men... Calder, Balder, and some others.  It didn’t take a rocket scientist to see where my preferences were heading, but I tried to shove those feelings aside for a little while longer, and just experience the evening.  It wasn’t easy, but eventually I was able to ignore myself long enough to have a good time with the rest of the Valkyries, sharing tales of tonight and nights past as they shared their horror stories of serving the Aesir, Asynjur, and Einherjar.  To be honest, it kind of felt like everyone telling their “No shit, this really happened...” stories around the dinner table, and it was a blast.

 

I noticed Rae there that evening, but I didn’t pay her any mind – I was still furious for the way she drugged me earlier – and when I looked up again, she was gone.  I wondered if I hurt her feelings – but I wasn’t sure I cared.  I resolved to talk to her later, so any wounds wouldn’t fester, but I wasn’t planning on rushing it. 

 

We ended up talking until the wee hours – and I eventually pulled myself from their midst and headed back to my quarters to relax and sleep.  Today had been a very, very long day.