- Shari -
I ingrain into Liqu that if possible she shall ask me before killing people.
Reviewing what happened I realize that she knows something I need to learn.
"By the way how did you manage not to get startled when he punched you? When that beast attacked me in the forest, I couldn’t control the dissolving and ended up killing it." (Shari)
That is pretty important to me, as I don’t want to accidentally cripple someone because of a little scare.
"Ah yes, I found that one. Looked like you made a good hunt. But why did you leave and waste it like this?" (Liqu)
"Because unlike you I am no natural-born or rather created predator and I don’t intend to start being one." (Shari)
"But you had such a good start! As if you’re a natural. Luckily I could take it with me. The whole treating you was so taxing. So it was really appreciated. Thank you!" (Liqu)
Damn, I’m starting to get that imaginary headache again that I always get if I talk with her for too long.
"The question I’ve asked?" (Shari)
"Yes, yes, controlling the enzyme it was? It’s a little tricky. You can use it at will for your nourishment or it can activate when you feel threatened, to prevent any threats from entering your body and getting to your core. The latter happens unconsciously and you could avoid it if you maintain heavy awareness to prevent the activation." (Liqu)
"So I have no other choice but to mentally strain myself all the time? I don’t think I can maintain such a state!" (Shari)
"Oh no, you mustn’t. There is a little trick to it." (Liqu)
"Really, then tell me!" (Shari)
"It is easy! The activation happens when you feel threatened. At the moment you feel just too threatened by everything. The trick is to call to your mind, that just your core matters and touch everywhere else is fine. You are afraid to get hurt even if that’s impossible, so you activate defensive measures at every possible penetration. If you just keep a valid margin around your core that you can’t allow to get crossed and concentrate on this space, then touch at any other place is fine." (Liqu)
Quite much to process, yet she can explain those things well.
A comfort zone it is.
What bugs me is that to achieve the wished results, I am again forced to leave a bit of my humanity behind and think more like a slime.
Which isn't favored by me.
After giving formal thanks I leave my room again to look after the shambles the ordeal left, to be precise my parents.
I find them sitting on their bed.
"Well, that got kind of messy. But do you understand how utterly stupid that action was? She is still dangerous and killing comes naturally for her and you just threw your fist inside this monster!" (Shari)
"Yes, I know! I’ve lost it for a moment." (Jona)
"If she would have been an ordinary monster you would be dead by now!" (Shari)
"Yet, she isn’t." (Hannah)
"She is capable of reason and that is at least something." (Shari)
"Still, you want to leave with her? Are sure about this?" (Jona)
"I said it before. It’s not like I like her, but I am absolutely sure, that I can trust her. She is so obsessed with me that I could ask for nearly anything and so I have a little help. And in my situation, I think any advantage helps." (Shari)
"But still, a monster?" (Jona)
I sigh with a lowered head before I look again straight at my father.
"Look at me carefully and ask yourself: How am I supposed to see her when I am like this? It’s not that I have no prejudices, but if I call her a monster I am insulting myself as well." (Shari)
It seems I am forced to be a bit more open-minded if I want to adjust to my new condition.
"Forgive me, I didn’t think about your feels when I speak like that." (Jona)
"No problem. It’s something I have to deal with myself and I don’t believe that others will be trying to be considerate. So I should get used to it better sooner than later." (Shari)
"My poor little girl!" (Hannah)
Mother strokes me briefly along the neck down my back.
Although I wear a shirt, which got quite soaked now, when she touched my neck she came into direct contact with the matter.
I utilize the tip Liqu gave me.
Nonetheless, there is some concern regarding the possible risks.
So I am a bit startled.
"Th-thank you mum, but this is dangerous! What if I lose control over whatever melts flesh as we all could see already?" (Shari)
"Can’t keep me from caring for my daughter when she needs me." (Hannah)
That’s mother.
No compromises on things that matter to her.
"Thanks, I love you!" (Shari)
I sit down on the bed, not really minding if the pants are doing the covering job properly.
It feels as if I now can ease up a bit.
I strained myself and kept my feelings controlled to deal with the possibility that my parents might hate me.
But they don’t and this helps very much.
Everything was so exhausting and I'm so done and angry and in the end just somehow sad.
And all of this comes now at me.
Then a slime drop falls on the ground, then two, three.
"Shari are you alright?" (Hannah)
"No! No I’m not alright and I will never be alright again!" (Shari)
What reason is there to act as if?
"Why… Why had it to be me? The world is so unfair and I can’t even vent my frustration as I want. I couldn’t even blame the one properly who is at fault! For what? That she was lonely? That she doesn’t understand humans enough? That she doesn't follow the same moral code as humans? That she is just so damned stupid? That she didn’t kill me as any normal monster would?! I could just as well scream at the heavens that all this came together only to hit me! That is just unfair in itself! And I don’t know how to bear it!" (Shari)
As if the world is just playing a joke on my costs!
"Before this, my greatest concern was if I would get married or just live alone as I did always here in this village. And now I can count myself lucky if no overeager people with weapons are killing me, believing to do a good deed!" (Shari)
I yell and cry at the same time not minding the tears that drip down on my pants and the floor, staining them.
And then something unbelievable happens:
Mum embraces me!
"It’s okay; everything’s going to be alright. I’m still there for you." (Hannah)
"And what if not?" (Shari)
"You were always strong, independent, and smart! There is no way that you wouldn’t find a solution to any problem, no matter how difficult!" (Hannah)
"Mum…" (Shari)
"And you have that biting sarcasm that allows you to challenge even the world." (Hannah)
"Glrb!" (Shari)
She might be right.
If my mum as a human can accept me then there might still be some hope for me.
I think I can make it!
"And dad tries to imitate a statue standing next to us." (Shari)
"It’s not like there is much to add for me." (Jona)
Huh, I think he patted my back!
But now it seems that the lack of resistance of the liquid is embarrassing him for his action.
"Thanks, dad." (Shari)
It is nice to know that someone loves you.
After a long emotional talk followed by themes not regarding recent developments, I leave again back to my room.
It starts to get late and I want to go through the things I need for my departure.
Liqu is sitting in the corner I assigned her last time.
However, something’s off.
Usually, she would in an overjoyed manner rush at me or gabble some nonsense or at least make some kind of move on me.
Yet this time, she is awfully quiet and looks down to the ground.
I am not used to this change of behavior and it is quite concerning.
"Something’s wrong?" (Shari)
.
.
.
"Hello! I'm talking to you!" (Shari)
.
.
.
"I…" (Shari)
"I am not stupid." (Liqu)
"Huh?" (Shari)
"I am not stupid because I don’t know things! I didn’t know many things, but I learned! I am still learning!" (Liqu)
I don’t really get her point.
What is she referring to?
Wait! Did she eavesdrop on me and my parents?
Well, I wasn’t actually quiet or tried to conceal it, but this might explain her behavior.
"It’s not like I didn’t understand anything. Maybe a bit, but the general idea was there." (Liqu)
"What are you trying to say?" (Shari)
"I knew you wouldn’t like what I was doing. I knew that you might not accept it! Not accept me! Hate me! But I ignored all these thoughts!" (Liqu)
"And why did you do it then?" (Shari)
"Because I am selfish. I did want it to work somehow, anyhow! I was ready to give so much of me just for the glimpse, of a possibility, that might be! For the chance to not stay lonely!" (Liqu)
Hard to respond as someone who just delved into the love of her family and took it eagerly in.
The scariest for me was the perspective that no one will ever act normal to me.
I was never extremely sociable or drawn to public events, but the possibility to be forever alone was something that terrified me so much that I was sure I couldn’t bear it.
And this possibility was her reality.
"And why this whole changing thing? You could just have me restrained like you did if talking was all you want!" (Shari)
"Didn’t want it in the first place, but you would have been fleeing without." (Liqu)
"Still, why this?" (Shari)
"Perspective, I think. Maybe a bit destroying the borders and a drop of dependency." (Liqu)
"So you planned it out fully aware of what you did?" (Shari)
"Half-aware. I have just a faint idea of the importance to you. Probably more than I thought. But, my desires came first. Couldn’t hold them. Couldn’t forget them. Didn’t want to give up on them! I had something to cling to, to keep me aware, besides awareness. For that bit of change, I would have done everything, instead just to bear with it. As far I know there was nothing like me in this world and this in itself is pain. Even if I fared better than the others in practice." (Liqu)
"So you decided to put me in the same misery?" (Shari)
"Then it wouldn’t have been one, as we wouldn’t be lonely, you would have me and I a reason." (Liqu)
"Nonetheless, you understood that I wouldn’t like you after what you did and probably never will?" (Shari)
"That's okay!" (Liqu)
"Then what is it that you want?" (Shari)
"You!" (Liqu)
"I don’t understand." (Shari)
"It is enough that you exist, enough that I can stay close without fight or flight, enough to can talk with someone. To have you is enough." (Liqu)
"So, you’ve got what you want, simply because I am not trying to run anymore? Was it worth it for you?" (Shari)
"Yes! Alone the first talk after you changed and could move was more than I ever had before. It was greater than anything I could imagine." (Liqu)
She is crying the whole time.
A strange mix of desperation, sadness… and joy!
"That means you didn’t want me as your partner or consort?" (Shari)
"Huh?" (Liqu)
"Figures, you don’t even know this concept. A pair that loves each other, lives together, and does things for each other. You hadn’t intended that?" (Shari)
"Oh, I want to stay with you! But I don’t need anything. It is enough if I can hold you dear. To have a reason to exist is bliss and I won’t let go of that, of you!" (Liqu)
She is smiling while the slime droplets are flooding down her face.
Pure joy!
A lovely picture, if not for the situation and the part about her being a monster.
Just picked on myself here.
I come closer and tower myself in front of her.
"You know, I am angry at you! Furious!" (Shari)
Her look shows understanding, though also fright at what has to come.
"Because of all you did! Because you do not truly understand what you did! Because of your mad talk that I have to change to adjust now, as true it might be! Because of the way you still draw close to me, besides all reasons that oppose this very idea! And foremost because I can comprehend your stupid reasons, you stupid slime!!!" (Shari)
She blankly stares at me, failing to process what I just said.
Which isn't surprising since I failed too!
"Goddamnit, you won!" (Shari)
"Won?" (Liqu)
"I will keep you, but you have to follow each one of my words and no protests!" (Shari)
"Eh, ah… hick… hick, glirb… Waaahhhh!" (Liqu)
If before her tears flowed steadily from her eyes, now there's a concerning gushing waterfall is emerging.
"Okay, I already said you won! You can stop the wailing!" (Shari)
How am I supposed to deal with someone this unstable?
"And cut these hugs!!!" (Shari)
After spending the night beside my bed, minding the experience of last night, which was tolerable due to the lack of negative input this body does experience, I wake up for my departure.
Still far too early, but I can kill some time by packing my stuff.
If there is one positive point, then it would be that my current body doesn't feel any kind of muscle strain after I get up.
This was a rather chronic problem I had to deal with since my occupation included quite a bit of bending down to rip out plants.
Now it is not the slightest bit hard to get up and going.
Yet that is directly less great if you consider that the reason is that my condition involves a general lack of any muscles which could pain.
Besides this state of affairs, it was also a little off-putting to not only find Liqu directly on my opposite but also to discover the fact that she apparently sleeps as a blob.
Wait! How do I look when I sleep?
I don't think I do this, as I am used to the shape of a human body and nothing was unusual when I woke up.
Liqu on the other side gives a completely new definition to morning-stretching when she shapes back.
Body extension might be more fitting to describe it.
She literally spreads to each side of the room.
To summarize my morning, waking up was weird but bearable.
Although it’s not fair to my mother, I changed my clothes and now wear a black shirt along with black pants, since the old ones were very soaked and I now can still take advantage of having access to my wardrobe.
I’ve chosen black because it isn’t so prone to change color when soaked by the slime.
I will also wear gloves, thick boots, and a raincoat, despite the shining sun.
I made Liqu wear brown pants, a white shirt, and boots, as I couldn’t allow her residue to leave a trail.
Naturally, she as well wears now a raincoat.
My wardrobe was never so big, so all we have for changing are the clothes I prepared yesterday.
Liqu is going to carry half of it in her sack since she has to do her part.
I also have a map, which I need to be careful not to touch directly, and my knife.
Because I did not think the knife stored together with the other things would be a good idea, I reluctantly decided to store it in my body, naturally far away from the core.
There was also the idea that while I couldn’t punch anyone for self-defense, I need to have some way to do something when I get pressed.
Mum provided some rations.
But as they are vegetarian, the impact should be small.
Nonetheless, the gesture is appreciated.
I noticed that my parents seemed very tired.
Maybe it was because the last time they slept our house got raided by armed men, yet I would rather blame Liqu.
Sleeping next to a genuine monster is difficult.
First-hand experiences!
Also, they have a lot on their mind.
So I hope that they can find just a little peace now.
I know they love me and that they believed my crazy story was wonderful, but I wouldn't expect them to feel comfortable in the long run.
I turn to leave, but at this moment my mother grabs my hand.
"Shari! Just know, even if it will be dangerous you can always come back to us! We are still your parents, so don’t think that we wouldn’t welcome you whenever you need us. Nothing will ever change that you are my daughter and I couldn’t see you as something different no matter the circumstances." (Hannah)
My mum gives me an intimate hug and when she separates from me, I notice I have her mirror in the glove of the hand she briefly took.
I am close to my tears, but my mother just smiles at me and I can catch myself.
After that, I give my farewells and mum embraces me again, while fighting some tears.
Dad is again acting somewhat hard, yet somehow I manage to catch his gentle nature through this facade he maintains while setting me off.
And so I begin my journey together with a slime who has to be considered unstable at best.
Literally!
Thx for the chap.
Your humanity is your mind not your body and your mind is in your core, so that can not be so hard.
"As if the world is just playing a joke on my costs!" --- Yep, blame the author here.
"It is nice to know that someone loves you" --- hummm Liqu don't just love you, she go Yandere for you, that one heavy love.
I guess the Yandere tag was the right decision.
I thought about separating the last part as some kind of epilog for the first arc, but the departure was too small (guessed this would be a good point for a cut).
However, since this is a webnovel and I didn't plan an end we have still quite much in store.
Adventuring part on!
Shari was under the concept that Liqu didn't know any better cause she was a monster. But here she clearly learn that Liqu did all that knowingly even though she might get hated and all that.
Anyone would be livid at this moment, yet Shari just shrug it off and accepts it all.
YET she can't dissolve animals or behave as a slime while she now is a slime. All this is just so confusing. How come she can accept that and not that she is a slime?
Shari is not a very vengeful person, but more selfcentered. She does focus on what would be important for her own situation, instead of going after others.
Regarding Liqu she has to admit that she might have gone crazy in her stead. Like this she can understand why things happened. She doesn't suddenly like Liqu, but decides to ignore her anger so she can take advantage on her. Also she sees Liqu still more as something between an animal and a young child who acts all based on emotions.
Shari is simply the type who wails that something bad happens to her and blames the situation itself instead of venting her anger on others. Like I said, she is selfcentered and her own misfortune is what she concentrates on.
f*cking disgusting.
Edit: And you blocking me just makes me feel even more correct in my assertion. This story is disgusting.
So, for anyone curious, this is what I meant when I said the author refused to engage in conversation. The literal first thing I bring up. Liqu admitting 'she' doesn't care about ruining Shari's life. "I've had many people say that Shari was too harsh, also she's only 10, so she doesn't know any better."
This is both blatantly untrue AND dismissing the point. Liqu KNOWS what 'she' did was wrong, how 'her' assaulting and torturing Shari would RUIN her life, but Liqu didn't give a sh*t about any of that. It's NEVER brought up as a point of contention because "Shari understands why" is somehow good enough. They force Shari to just move on and accept Liqu wholeheartedly. They say "Well, Shari doesn't like her JUST yet," but that implies the abuse victim WILL come to like her abuser over time. Which is, frankly, f*cking disgusting. The levity the comments have when discussing this is also disgusting.
Okay...
How do I have to take this?
@expentio Liqu outright admits it ruined Shari's life while fully understanding that and Shari just says "okay :) understandable"? Nah, that would form an irrevocable rift in literally any kind of "relationship" that could ever form. Liqu is a deplorable, irredeemable, unlovable monster that deserves absolutely nothing but literal hell and Shari being forced into a relationship with that f*cking thing is exactly what I said it was. f*cking disgusting.
The absolute best Liqu deserves to ever be is a tool Shari uses to further her own goals. The idea of Shari being forced into a relationship with that f*cking thing is disgusting.
@KoolAidDogan Kinda funny that I have many comments later on who say that Shari is treating Liqu too harshly.
Seems like there are many different possible opinions on that matter.
Personally, I think that Liqu is at no stage of her mental development to really think empathetically about others. Aside from an idea of "may not like it at first" she isn't all that aware to the consequences of her actions. Therefore it might be right to wait for her mental development to decide if she's redeemable or not.
@expentio and it never should've been given the chance to find out. Liqu is a f*cking monster masquerading as a child that irrevocably ruined Shari's life and KNEW it did. "She" doesn't deserve the chance to grow a conscience, and judging by the later chapters I skimmed, "she" literally never does. "She" doesn't deserve Shari. Shari shouldn't have even viewed "her" as something worth caring about if Shari was actually a person instead of a story character forced to accept Liqu. That f*cking monster doesn't deserve moral consideration. The single best thing Liqu could have done before forcing Shari to rely on it is kill itself.
As for everyone telling you otherwise, they're either psychotic or have put zero thought into how terrible of a monster Liqu is because "Haha, funny slime yandere". People humanize serial killers and rapists if they're appealing enough at a surface level, and Liqu is about as bad if not worse than that, so it really isn't surprising... but it's just as disgusting. Though maybe a bit less since it's a fictional character.
@KoolAidDogan Seems overly harsh to me. In particular, I would be careful with saying things that could be considered insulting, like calling others psychotic. Before everything else, it's simply not a good base for a discussion if one gets directly so aggressive. As you said, it's about a fictional character. While it might be true that fiction can portray reality in some way, one should at least try to be constructive about one's criticism and not be overly harsh in the response when talking to others. Communication is an important ability that nowadays gets all too rare when people only demonize the other party. That's at least my take on that.
Personally, I like the idea that hatred can be overcome. Not every wrong needs to conclude in more bloodshed. It might be idealistic to think so, but I believe sometimes people can change and redeem themselves. People who always call for blood are dangerously close to cross the line themselves and be subjected to the same treatment. So while every wrong shouldn't be immediately forgiven, sometimes corrective actions can bear better results.
By the way, Liqu is ten.
@expentio "10 years" too old, by my count. And, no, I honestly don't care about disparaging others. Is it mean? Yeah. Does it matter though? Not really. I'm hardly talking to them, now am I? Though considering how you're entirely refusing to even engage with the topic and offering worthless platitudes about turning the other cheek in the face of someone entirely ruining your life just because they're a selfish piece of shit, I honestly don't even know how much I'm actually talking to YOU.
And dont get me wrong, it's a nice idea. But Liqu doesn't deserve it. Liqu is a monster that has done nothing and WILL do nothing to improve, because it views humanity, and thus Shari's thought process, as lesser. "She" doesnt give a f*ck and, even hundreds of chapters down the line, will give absolutely no f*cks about anyone or anything but Shari for literally no reason other than Shari also being forcibly turned into a sentient slime. Against her will. By "her". Which "she" will also continue to give no f*cks about. Which Shari has already entirely forgiven "her" for, for literally no reason except the story demanded her to.
Liqu is a detestable, irredeemable monster from start to finish, and you have given literally no signs of "her" being anything but. It's something made to be killed, because all it is is a blight on the world. The only reason Shari isn't is because she IS human, even if the little piece of sh*t tried to make her otherwise.
@KoolAidDogan In my opinion I answered to all the things you said. I wouldn't know where I disregarded you so much that you would have a reason to think I'm not talking to you. Also, I don't think anything I said were worthless platitudes. For me, these were my honest opinions. Instead, I need to say it's quite demeaning to claim that the things I'm saying are worthless while only you can be right if there are differing opinions. It shows a certain disregard for other people if you're claiming all they say are worthless platitudes. In fact, I said at no point anything about offering the other cheek. Not even in a roundabout manner. I didn't say that self-defense isn't fine. Only that I believe one should at least try corrective measures before going about killing those one doesn't like.
Especially, that you have such a very different opinion from others is a good example why one shouldn't just jump to killing others. All people on this world have their own character and judge things differently. If your worldview would be applied everyone could easily land on the list as "irredeemable". Me for writing this story, just as you for your commenting attitude. Everyone in the end.
Also, yes it matters if you are badmouthing someone in an open forum. They all have the chance to read it. In the end, you brought more hatred into this world by unnecessarily claiming them to be lesser. Unnecessarily writing something that you know isn't constructive but solely destructive. You can also mistreat others without directly engaging with them. I really don't see a reason why anyone with a good character would want to make the world a little worse for others. You may disagree with them, but harassing them only because they share different opinions than you about stuff I see as fully debatable makes you the only one who deliberately hurts others.
After the tirade you let out there its more than understandable they blocked you.
Its one thing to make ones viewpoint know, but its hell of another thing to do so in a manner that is simply dehumanizing and hurtfull to other people.